*The Clergy’s press members seek out opinions from longer outstanding bands about the mysterious Ghouls and their anonymous crew*
Iron Maiden: yeah they’re pretty fantastic! we’ve toured with them once before and plan to do it alot in the future. they’re great. I really wanna know who they are under those masks though…..they are masks….right?
Rob Zombie: hmn….I think I may have heard of them before.
Interviewer: *hands him a picture of Papa* that’s the lead singer.
Rob Zombie: oh yeah!! I remember now….hmn…that guy looks like the guy tattooed on Sherri’s ass…..HEY WAIT A MINUTE-
MCC: *sweats nervously*
System of a Down: I mean, they’re not our scene or genre. but we’re open to pretty much everything. it was mentioned by a nameless ghoul- that’s what they’re called right? yeah it was said by them that their theme is critiquing man and not god. it’s uh, it’s very interesting to say the least. definitely refreshing. we wouldn’t mind meeting them.
Marilyn Manson: they’re alright. I’ve heard their songs before. never have had a chance to meet them in person though so I can’t really give my full opinion. I’m a little indifferent. I was the first one to do the whole anti christ shtick anyway.
Rob Zombie: *coughs*
Marilyn Manson: what was that??
Rob Zombie: me?
Marilyn Manson: you got something you wanna say???
Rob Zombie: no not me man. it’s just stuffy in here.
Behemoth: MAH BOYS!!!!
Candlemass: Papa III performed with us on stage before. they are an absolute delight. definitely a band I would recommend.
Rammstein: we’ve played at a festival or two witb them before. they have a reoccurring theme of sin, alot of sex, and the female orgasm. we like that….we like that a lot…..Ghost is good.
Ozzy Osbourne: FUCKIN GHOST. THEY ARE FUCKIN CRAZY. I ‘MEMBER HEARING ABOUT THEM BACK IN THE 70’S.
Ozzy Osbourne: THEY WAS STEALIN MY FUCKIN SHIT. SABBATH WAS THE ORIGINAL FUCKIN THING MAN. I HATE FUCKIN PEOPLE LIKE THAT FUCKIN DO YOUR OWN FUCKIN THING FUCKINN
Interviewer: if you would not mind me intervening. Ghost first was birthed in 2008. and they….did not take inspiration from you….not much anyway. no offense…
Ozzy Osbourne: WHO???
Ozzy Ozbourne: GHOST??? AH THOSE FUCKKNNNN MOTHER FUCKERSSSS ARE FUCKNNN SAVAGE MAN I LOVE 'EM TO DEATH THEY ARE A FUCKINN GOOD SHINDIG IF THERE EVER WAS ONE.
Interviewer: ah! yes…good to know we’re on the right track. now-
Ozzy Osbourne: IM THE PRINCE OF FUCKINNN DARKNESS!!!!!