Can't-tell-if-serious

the signs based on people i personally know
  • aries: probably the hardest working and also the best procrastinator. they have no filter. will drop everything to help you. has the wildest almost unbelievable stories and evidence in case you don't believe them. can make you smile even when you feel like shit.
  • taurus: the biggest romantic with the biggest heart. you don't think they care about you? they do. fuzzy blanket enthusiast. no matter how busy they are, how much work they have to do, if you need to talk, they're there. they won't share unless you ask. always watching a new tv show.
  • gemini: probably knows the scientific explanation behind that. not two faced contrary to popular belief, but is just so goddamn charming they can get along with various types of people. will literally wallow in their negative emotions until they burst. humour is their best defense mechanism.
  • cancer: will call you out if you act stupid. wants you to remember all the good times you've had with them because they're scared you'll forget and leave them behind. willing to drive for hours to get some really good food.
  • leo: has the courage to say the things that everyone else was too afraid to say. can be sobbing one second and making jokes the next. has the most random things on their wall, but in an organized way. will drive to your house at midnight because they wanted to be with you.
  • virgo: their room is actually a mess most of the time. likes to avoid their problems a lot. but once forced to deal with them, it didn't even seem like they were struggling at all. more of a listener. often has flashbacks of dumb things they've said.
  • libra: prioritizes the wrong things. it takes a while for their jokes to be understood by the public. has a recognizable catchphrase. has no tolerance for assholes and will literally go off on you and make you rethink your life choices.
  • scorpio: so determined. will do anything to distract themselves from their emotional instability. has hundreds of friends but only considers 3 of them as real ones. sleeps a lot because its the only time their mind shuts up. will remember that one thing you said seven years ago.
  • sagittarius: always thinks of something fun to do. has a lot of doubts and insecurities about themselves and won't believe you when you try to reassure them. very picky about the people they choose to spend their time with. clumsy af and will literally trip on air. you probably owe them money.
  • capricorn: sometimes you can't tell if they're being serious or if they're joking. often questions the validity of their friendships. probably cried the other night. likes to go on roofs. good at looking productive but they are actually just looking at cat videos.
  • aquarius: so incredibly talented. cannot multitask for their life. belts at the top of their lungs in the shower. when they're walking it looks like they're walking to the beat of some 80s funk song. they are the shoulder you cry on. handles confrontation well.
  • pisces: tries to act really tough and independent but in reality they just want a big hug. loves insulated water bottles. has an encyclopedia full of inside jokes they share with their friends. was probably the teacher's favorite. owns books they haven't even opened
  • Taserface: "You've gone soft old man!"
  • Yondu: "I AIN'T GONE NOTHIN'!"
  • *Yondu kills everyone that betrayed him, rescues Rocket and Groot, helps the Guardians kill a celestial being, and sacrifices himself to save Quill.*