“So, Mel,” I hear no one asking me but I’ll pretend anyway, “What’s your favourite ‘cassarric’ related singy-song? I’m just dying to know what gets you in the mood to write them!”

“Well,” I answer with a wink and a nod, “good question, nobody! It’s actually a cover of Fine Young Cannibal’s ‘She Drives Me Crazy’ by Miracles of Modern Science!”

“But why?” I hear from the back of the completely empty room.

“Why, I love the idea of Varric doing the first verse, Cassandra doing the second, and them coming together for the last verse!”

“That sounds dirty,” said everyone who wasn’t there actually. “Like, really dirty, you weirdo.”

I turn my head and sigh aloud. “Aye,” I grin. “‘Tis.”

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