CLICK THE THING

me: [enjoys my garbage]

some pretentious fuck: excuse me, but that thing you are enjoying has no real intellectual substance and I don’t like it and you are stupid for liking it

me: [enjoys my garbage MORE AGGRESSIVELY]

some of my favorite silly plotlines from Scottish ballads
  • Small village thinks illicit whiskey stills are its biggest problem until raiders show up and trash their everything. Death, destruction, etc. Raiders find whiskey still, get lit, pass out. Villagers murder them. Peace restored. Whiskey is king.
  • Shepherd lad spots fair maid skinny-dipping. Fair maid pleads for her virtue and/or clothing. Shepherd lad is complete gentleman, escorts her home with clothing and virtue intact. Fair maid demands to know what she has to do to get laid around here.
  • Plucky heroine’s boyfriend goes to sea, fails to return. Plucky heroine dresses in drag and goes to find him. Plucky heroine discovers boyfriend happily married to someone else. Plucky heroine shoots his head right off.
  • Do Not Stop By The Local Weaver’s House, You Will Get So Pregnant, Like, Super Pregnant, I’m Not Kidding, This Has Been A Public Service Announcement.
  • Wealthy farmwife habitually searches her maidservants’ dorm for SIGNS OF MEN out of concern for their virtue. Maids less concerned for their virtue are having None Of It. Maids hide scarecrow in dorm, farm mistakes scarecrow for prowler, farmwife decapitates scarecrow. Farmwife believes herself a murderer. Maids now permitted to do as they please, virtue-wise. 
  • Idiot son sent to market to sell cow. Scheming lass seduces idiot son out of cow, pants, and even shoes.
  • Dad returns from business trip to find daughter Super Pregnant, demands to meet the man responsible. Dad takes one look at man responsible and tells daughter “okay, you’re off the hook, I would have banged him too.”
  • Handsome stranger bribes fair maid to leave town with him. Fair maid rejects various bribes until handsome stranger flat-out offers her money, which she accepts. Handsome stranger turns out to be, to no one’s great surprise, the actual devil. Fair maid regrets her life choices.
  • Gallant knight goes forth to slay dragon. Dragon eats knight, but has indigestion.

ETA: If anyone has been reblogging this and wants to know what the songs are, here is the list! Or if you’re too lazy to click things, The Devil Uisge Beatha + Shepherd Lad + Billy Taylor + Tae The Weaver’s Gin Ye Go + The Straw Man + Cow Song + Willie Winsbury + The Devil’s Courtship + Sir Eglamore

7

- “Have no fear… For I am here now.”

Sometimes Todoroki dreams of the past. 

Midoriya lulls him back to sleep with soft touches and heavy nerdiness.

6

The Night Court - Inner Circle ~ The court of dreams

“The people who knew that there was a price, and one worth paying, for that dream. The bastard born warriors, the Illyrian half breed, the monster trapped in a beautiful body, the dreamer born into a court of nightmares. And the huntress with an artist’s soul.”

honestly, living in a point-and-click/hidden object game must be so wild like

you want to go to the shop to buy some milk? Okay just hop in the car.

except you’ve lost your car keys.

so you look around for them, but they’re nowhere to be found. you’ve recently found there’s a mouse living in your house and you saw it holding something shiny earlier. maybe its got your car keys? so you go to lure it out with some cheese. except you don’t have any cheese in your fridge. so you go over to your neighbour’s house and ask if you could borrow a little bit of cheese. they say yeah but they need to find their handkerchief first. it’s gone missing and they simply must have it. after some looking you spot it caught on a telephone wire. your neighbour has a ladder but most of the rungs are broken. so you go to the forest and gather up some wood. while there, you meet another neighbour who’s lost their favourite necklace, and asks you to tell them if you see it. there’s an a abandoned shed in the wood and in it you find a rusty old hammer. there are nails, but they’re bent and rusty. so then you scout around your house, your neighbours house, the wood, the shed, and your otherneighbours house, and collect up some random shards to metal that are just lying around.

so go back to your first neighbour’s house and fix the ladder with the rusty hammer and random metal shards

using the (dubiously-fixed) ladder, you get their hankie from the phone line. the moment you’re back on the ground, the ladder breaks but who gives a fuck because you got the handkerchief. you give the hankie to your neighbour, they give you the cheese. you go and put the cheese outside a mousehole. the mouse comes out

it’s holding a marble.

it drops the marble, and you pick it up.

you go outside, and there’s a kid searching around. they lost their favourite marble, but they found this nice necklace. you give the kid the marble. they give you the necklace.

you go back to the woods. your necklace-neighbour isn’t there. you go to their house. they’re not there. you go to the handkerchief neighbour’s house. not there. your house. not there. eventually you find them in some ignorable part of the map that has had no relevance to now and will have no relevance again.

you give the neighbour the necklace.

they claim they found your car keys out in your drive.

finally

finally you can go to the shop and get some milk

you go home. read a specific piece of paper to get the code to your garage, and collect three keys.

using the keys and the code, you open your garage.

your car has no wheels.

8

jyn and cassian (from various videos)

2

You have to be honest about how bad it feels so you can move on

2

“You are alone.

The cosmos stretch before you, endless, 

and the sea of stars drowns you in its vastness.”

Finished my first digital piece based on a story I’ve been working on!