BriTANicK

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JUST SHOOT THE BALL, LANCE  [x]

BRITANICK'S "Eagles are Turning People into Horses: The Movie" the Ginger Ale Scene
  • Lyle: Listen, if things get hairy, you’re gonna have to sneak out the back. You’ll need an alibi.
  • Hannah: I’m scared.
  • Lyle: That’s good thinking. Act scared. So, if they ask you, say that you were with your boyfriend when all of a sudden, he and his friends set a plan into motion that they have whenever a girl tries to move a relationship too fast.
  • Hannah: Okay. Wait, what?
  • Lyle: An expensive, complicated plan meant to scare the girl away forever, filled with horses and eagles and all this nonsense, just because he can’t break up with you honestly. Just because he can’t stand to look you in the eye and say… You have such an annoying laugh. What is so God damn funny that it causes you to make that sound? My God, woman! You sound like an overweight whale with throat cancer. Everybody hates you!
  • Frank: I hate you!
  • Lyle: He hates you so much!
  • Frank: Did you take my ginger ale?
  • Lyle: Did you do it?
  • Frank: DID YOU TAKE MY GINGER ALE?!?!
  • Lyle: Did you take it, Hannah? We know you did!!
  • Frank: Oh yeah, ‘cause I have a lot of things! No, I don’t, Hannah! I’ve got ginger ale! I HAD ginger ale and then you drank it!
  • Lyle: You like to walk around and then you steal a drink and then you go [sip] “Mmm! This is a tasty drink! I do enjoy this! Hahaha!” Oh, wait no. That’s not how you sound. [walrusy whale type noises]
  • Frank: Did you take my ginger ale?
  • Lyle: How can you look at me like this when you laugh like that and you take his ginger ale?? And you go around marching from state to state in your little trotty car –
  • Frank: DID YOU TAKE MY GINGER ALE?!? HANNAH?!?
  • Lyle: You sit in your fucking tower and you look down on those beverages which aren’t yours and you say “I will have that! Thank you muchly!”
  • Frank: NOBODY ELSE DRINKS IT!
  • Lyle: I’M GOING TO SHOVE MY FINGER INTO YOUR EYE! DO YOU KNOW THIS?!?!
  • Hannah: You bastard!
  • Frank: Guys? Guys.
  • Hannah: I knew something weird was going on!
  • Lyle: This is all hypothetical, Hannah!
  • Frank: Guys!
  • Lyle: [shaking Hannah by the shoulders] Hannah! You have to trust me before I leave forever!!!
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“Something’s wrong.”
“WHERE’S MY PENIS.”

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“I work for the COA”

“The CIA?”

“FUCK THE CIA. The COA. It’s an organization”

“What do those letters stand for?”

“If only there were enough time to explain what every letter in every word could possibly mean! But there isn’t any, because I just explained all that”

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People of tumblr, please watch this fucking video. 

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The Dinner Party

Britanick knows how to drive a joke past the obvious parts in the first twenty seconds, then build two more acts before landing on a classic punchline.

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This is my favorite scene in cinematic history.

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I found this amazing webseries called NEXT TIME ON LONNY at work today.  It stars Alex Anfanger and features the BriTANicK boys.  My stomach was killing me after watching all five episodes! It shows about 30 seconds of the show Lonny then 2-4 minutes showing you what happens next.

I hope they make more.