You are sensitive to your own feelings; you indulge yourself in feelings which are always and exhaustingly about your reactions to people and events. You haven’t the faintest idea about other people’s feelings – how you affect them. You invent complications, you analyse without reason or need very simple occurrences, and you analyse with very little true knowledge of people. It does not occur to you that this is an outrageous burden on others; not friendship but emotional tyranny.
…Emotional tyranny, Betsy. The rule, your rule, is: tread softly, by God, or you will disturb my feelings. It’s an enormous stupid tedious bore. You can have all the feelings you want, but the only practical way you can handle this is: cut out the people who distress your feelings and take the rest of the world at face value, the face the world presents, because everyone has enough real problems without getting bogged down in the problems you manufacture.
Because, with all your feelings, you have never stopped to look at yourself: a woman who sulks when events don’t work out as desired, who has innumerable absolute needs which are not life and death matters but your absolutes, who has to be kept happy or else by golly it’s miseryville all round. Friendship is fun and a loose mutual aid society. It isn’t soul-picking (your soul, note) and you’ve made me as furious as I’ve ever been. I won’t have this nonsense and this tyranny. I have never had it from anyone else and I’m not having it any more from you. Try growing up.
Martha Gellhorn, from a letter to Betsy Drake written c. January 1983
Imagine getting so close to love that your lips get all trembly from its vibrations. And then in the second it takes for your eyes to close, for your soul to flutter open for it, it’s gone. Gone, but it’s all you see or remember. Love distorts reality. It commands chaos. Love is glorious and terrifying. You gotta brace yourself.
Dazzle Brite and The Xolor kids!!! Mash up of the X-Men and Rainbow Brite’s Color Kids. Dazzler / Rainbow Brite Scarlet Witch / Red Butler Wolverine / La La Orange Jubilee / Canary Yellow Rogue / Patty O’Green Ice man / Buddy Blue Northstar / Indigo Psylocke / Shy Violet Gambit / Tickled Pink Storm / Stormy Nightcrawler / Moonglow
As to writing. What I have to say, I must say: simply to get it out. After 4 hours trying, whether it’s failed or not, one is physically and mentally exhausted. I mean it. All I want to do is creep into bed, notably after failure. Also one cannot think coherently of anything else. It eats away in the brain, a ceaseless conversation with oneself. The smallest chore is horrendous to get through. People do not stimulate; they exhaust.
Cary Grant and Betsy Drake with Fleur Cowles enjoying an indoor picnic, 1956: “My husband and I were in Spain when Cary [Grant] was filming “The Pride and the Passion”. Our picnic on a hill overlooking Toledo -interrupted by rain—was brought back to the hotel at Cary’s insistence. Betsy [Drake (left)] and I kept our hats on. The waiter thought we were mad!