Bear-King

anonymous asked:

is it me, or does Goetia's Buer sound like a good guy? or at least a true neutral at that, this descriptions make him look like a intellectual in philosophy, a tea aficionado and a skilled medic. so what if he is a polite daemon? MAYBE he lacks true morality but from what i can tell from this descriptions, he seems like at least a cultured (possibly) polite dude.

You know, there’s a lot of them that sound like they wouldn’t want to immediately rip your throat out. That’s why I was waiting to answer this one; I wanted to go through all 72 and pick out the Goetia Goodies (O) and the Goetia Goons (X). Let’s see, in order…

  1. BAEL: Hoarse voice, spider legs, fussy. Sounds like a royal pain! (X)
  2. AGARES: I doubt he can always rein in that croc. (X)
  3. VASSAGO: One of many to tell the past and future, he can also help you find things you’ve lost. Just so long as you keep it clean, I guess. (O)
  4. GAMIGIN: A horse with a hoarse voice. That’s unethical. (X)
  5. MARBAS: Can cure diseases, but also cause them. Surely in league with Big Pharma! (X)
  6. VALEFOR: Tempts people to steal! (X)
  7. AMON: Spits fire, but cures controversies between friends. Can also cause feuds? But I have a soft spot for Amon, so… (O)
  8. BARBATOS: Lets you understand birds and dogs, opens magical chests. What a pal! (O) 
  9. PAIMON: The most obedient to Lucifer, definitely a Bad Boy. (X) 
  10. BUER: And here we are at the gentle Dr. Buer. (O) 
  11. GUSION: Depending on what a “Xenopilus” is, he’s otherwise all about friendships. (O)
  12. SITRI: One of those who makes people horny. Armed and dangerous. (X) 
  13. BELETH: He’s got all those trumpeters. Very annoying! (X)
  14. LERAJE: The belligerent demon Robin Hood. (X) 
  15. ELIGOR: Knows all about wars, but doesn’t seem to be all about fighting them. Still, will err on the side of caution here. (X) 
  16. ZEPAR: Can make people infertile! What a dickweed. (X) 
  17. BOTIS: Future-telling, reconciliation, but never trust a viper with a sword. (X) 
  18. BATHIN: The first of those who can teleport people. Neat, but rife for abuse (and Star Trek-style transporter accidents). (X) 
  19. SALLOS: Another croc-rider, but specifically saying he’s peaceful. Well, I’m sold. (O) 
  20. PURSON: Rides a bear. Despite that, the Kings are probably not to be trusted. (X)
  21. MORAX: The bull-man who just want to make the world a smarter place. (O)
  22. IPOS: The Ugliest Demon, but he makes people witty. A Cyrano in our midst? (O)
  23. AIM: A pyromaniac. (X)
  24. NABERIUS: Another teacher! (O)
  25. GLASYA-LABOLAS: “An author of Bloodshed and Manslaughter.” (X)
  26. BUNE: Dispenses money. Commie! (X)
  27. RONOVE: The monster man who nonetheless is a rhetoric expert. (O)
  28. BERITH: He is the Philosopher’s Stone in demon form. All that gold will crash the markets! (X)
  29. ASTAROTH: One of the nastiest. Plus he has bad breath! (X)
  30. FORNEUS: More rhetoric and friend-making. (O)
  31. FORAS: Can make people invisible. Lead us not into temptation! (X)
  32. ASMODEUS: Need I say more? (X)
  33. GAAP: Makes people ignorant. (X)
  34. FURFUR: Another fickle one about summoning, can also cause thunderous storms. (X)
  35. MARCHOSIAS: Vomits fire, but really wants to be an angel again, so perhaps would still be on his best behavior. (O)
  36. STOLAS: All about that astronomy and those herbs and precious stones. No bias here! (O)
  37. PHENEX: A sweet singer and poet. Another who wishes to be an angel once more. (O)
  38. HALPHAS: Probably nice, but is also the bad kind of gun nut. (X)
  39. MALPHAS: Can read the minds of your enemies. As if you don’t already know from their passive-aggressive tweets and comments. (X)
  40. RAUM: Another dirty thief (but of rich kings, so maybe it’s OK), but also destroys cities. Oh. (X)
  41. FOCALOR: Kills and drowns people. Right to the point! Or to the bottom? (X)
  42. VEPAR: Guides warships, but also putrefies sores and causes worms to breed in them. Gross! (X)
  43. SABNOCK: Like Halphas, only for armor, but shares Vepar’s vile worm-breeding-in-sores power. (X)
  44. SHAX: The stealer of senses! (X)
  45. VINE: Discovers wizards and witches (!), but causes rough storms on waters. Also a King. (X)
  46. BIFRONS: Doesn’t seem so bad, but hangs out with the dead so he’s probably fetid. (X)
  47. UVALL: Another Goetia PUA. (X)
  48. HAAGENTI: More alchemy. These demons need some new hobbies! (X)
  49. CROCELL: Can discover baths and warm them up real nice, but also creates noises that sound like rushing torrents, like some weirdo. Consider it ambiance, I guess. (O)
  50. FURCAS: This Knight is a “cruel old man” who teaches pyromancy. We live in the universe where pyromancy is OP, so… (X)
  51. BALAM: Invisibility, King, Bear. Not a good enough ratio. (X)
  52. ALLOCES: NO MORE WARRIORS ON HORSES, PLEASE (X)
  53. CAIM: The bird-man, he lends understanding of animals and the waters (!), and things to come. He answers in hot coals, so as long as he’s not summoned near flammable objects Caim probably won’t give you any trouble. (O)
  54. MURMUR: A PERFECT philosophy teacher and mediator to the dead. Just wear earplugs for his trumpeting cohorts. (O)
  55. OROBAS: Tells of the past, present, future, and of divinity and the creation of the world. Said to be “very faithful” to the summoner. What’s not to love? (O)
  56. GREMORY: Future-telling, but another that messes with the hearts of women, if commanded. Come on occultist, just use a dating app like everyone else! (X)
  57. OSE: Ose can transform the summoner into “any Shape.” Keep your fetishes to yourself. (X)
  58. AMY: The flaming liberal science teacher. Like Caim, practice fire safety and you should be cool. (O)
  59. ORIAS: An astrologer, but can also magically promote people through ranks, presumably those undeserving of it. (X)
  60. VAPULA: A winged, lion-headed professor of “all handicrafts and professions.” (O)  
  61. ZAGAN: The bull King, can transmute blood into wine. Sounds a hair more effective than a wine festival. (X)
  62. VOLAC: Tells where hidden treasures are and where serpents may be seen. Needs a friend, badly. (O)
  63. ANDRAS: If you treat him as a joke, Andras will straight up kill you; suppose he’s tired of being laughed at for being an owl-headed man riding a wolf. (X)
  64. FLAUROS: Another particular demon; will lie if things aren’t just right, but can also burn people to death. (X)
  65. ANDREALPHUS: Who wouldn’t want to learn geometry from a peacock? (O)
  66. KIMARIS: The last horseback warrior. Logic, rhetoric, rules spirits of Africa, etc. (O)
  67. AMDUSIAS: The musician of Hell, Amdusias can also bend trees to the summoner’s will. That’s so weirdly specific I think I have to give it a pass. (O)
  68. BELIAL: The King Belial seems to be another fickle with the summoning process, requiring gifts and sacrifices, but is written to have a better demeanor than many others. Still, play with fire… (X)
  69. DECARABIA: The original star man and ornithologist, he just wants you to understand birds! (O)
  70. SEERE: He’s like a demonic U-Haul truck, carrying things to and fro as demanded. Tells of thievery, but doesn’t seem to condone it explicitly. (O)
  71. DANTALION: The last great teacher of the 72, but can control people’s minds. (X)
  72. ANDROMALIUS: Perhaps the most just of all the demons, Andromalius is said to catch and punish thieves and “discover all wickedness.” There must be a lot of internal conflict in Hell’s hierarchies, eh? (O)

So out of the 72, I have determined that 27 of them would be kind of nice. That’s not bad! But aside from the many teachers among them, Buer probably ends up with one of the best professions and demeanors, if not the best.

Of course, all of these demons still have command over X number of demon legions, Buer with 50, so it’s probably all relative, anyway.

2

Queen Cersei laughed. “Wait until you birth a child, Sansa. A woman’s life is nine parts mess to one part magic, you’ll learn that soon enough… and the parts that look like magic often turn out to be messiest of all.” She took a sip of milk. “So now you are a woman. Do you have the least idea of what that means?”

“It means that I am now fit to be wedded and bedded,” said Sansa, “and to bear children for the king.” 

- Sansa IV, A Clash of Kings

Consider this a 3 am AU written entirely on mobile tumblr in which Neil is a runaway prince and Andrew is a bandit/thief/Robin Hood-esque whatever the fuck with his family + Kevin, and like most of the plot is over and done with.

o0o0o0o

“Abram.” The name rolls off of Andrew’s tongue, unfamiliar. “Abram,” he repeats. “Is that a truth?”

“It’s the only truth I know,” Neil responds. “But if ‘Neil’ is a lie, I’d like to keep it so for as long as possible.”

“You are Neil Josten,” Andrew says. His tone holds no room for arguments. Neil has never been good at listening to such things, though.

“I am Nathaniel Wesninski,” he says, barely forcing the words out. “I am Prince Nathaniel Wesninski and my father–”

“You are Neil Abram Josten.” Even if he had not spoken, the conviction behind Andrew’s eyes would have been enough to shut him up. He wonders, not for the first time, how anyone could believe him to be heartless. How anyone could believe him to be The Monster that they’ve all labeled him as. Perhaps Andrew is more human than all of them. Maybe he just knows the truth better than all of them. Maybe, perhaps. “You are Neil Abram Josten and you are one of us.”

It’s the last words that knock the air out of his chest. “I’m one of you?” Neil breathes, eyes wide.

“Don’t be an idiot.” Andrew leans forward to flick his forehead. “You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t.”

“I’m dangerous to you, and your family.”

“So is Kevin.”

“But you have a deal with Kevin.”

“I had a deal with you.”

There’s a silence. A bird chirps. The wind rustles through the trees. The moon just barely shines through the leaves above them.

Andrew lifts a hand and it hovers just beside Neil’s bandaged cheek. He’s giving him a choice. Neil leans to the side, letting him cup his cheek as he closes his eyes. He hasn’t touched Andrew since Riko took him. He is still warm, although the air is cool. He had thought Riko would bring him to is father, and he’d never feel him again. He’d been prepared for that. Now, he doesn’t know if he would ever be able to leave again.

“Your father still believes Riko to be alive and on his way to him,” Andrew murmurs lowly, stroking his thumb along the bandage. “All it would take is a worded letter to your uncle. He would be dealt with–him and his men.”

“And who will take over?” Neil asks. He opens his eyes. “I am not fit to be king.”

“You are a leader, Neil Josten. You will do fine. It is your birthright.”

“I have not been learning to be a leader in years. I am out of practice.”

“Your uncle can help you. You can build an alliance through your father’s death, and he can teach you to be king. He loves you enough to do so.”

“And what of you? And Nicky, and Aaron, and Kevin?”

Andrew is quiet while he ponders this. “What do you want? What is it that you wish for us to do?”

“I wish for you all to be able to find somewhere to rest.”

“Even Aaron?”

“…I suppose. He is your brother. I can retract your criminal status. You can have a place in the palace.”

“So you are planning on becoming king, then.”

“I–.” Neil blinks. He hadn’t realized. “I suppose so.”

Andrew nods. “We shall send a letter to your uncle, then?”

“I do not need him to fight my battles.”

“You will not fight your father.” It’s an ordwr, but it sounds like a plea. Neil is and likely always will be weak to Andrew. He cannot argue when he can hear that something behind his voice.

“Okay,” he murmurs, “we will send for my uncle.”

Andrew looks at him, looks into eyes that Neil hates because they are wholly his father’s. They are eyes that Andrew finds intriguing, he knows. “The era of Wesninski will soon be over,” he says. “You will be a king bearing the name Josten. You are not your father. You will be better than him.” You are better than him, he doesn’t say.

“Andrew…” His hand is still to his cheek. He isn’t inclined to remind him to remove it. “Yes or no?”

Neil has not kissed Andrew since the night before Riko had taken him all that time ago. The last time they kissed, Neil was aware of the time limit hanging above his head. He had wanted to know the feeling of being something to Andrew before he was forced to leave them.

There is still a limit, but he feels like they have all the time in the world. Nicky and Aaron and Kevin sleep, far enough away to not be heard but still be seen. In this moment, it is Andrew Doe and Neil Josten and no one else. This is the one thing Neil has ever truly wanted. Whatever ‘this’ may be.

“Yes.”

It is Andrew who closes the gap. Andrew who presses his lips so, so softly to Neil’s in a way that is odd, but not unwelcome.

It is not a kiss in a haze of lust. It is not one of desperation. It is not one that speaks of a goodbye and the knowledge that ‘this’ will never be anything ever again.

It is a kiss that holds the promise they had made all those months ago, and the silent promise they made just then. It speaks of that 'something’ that Andrew refuses to acknowledge. It speaks of the things they will never tell each other, but know, deep down. It speaks of battles hard won and the freedom that is so, so close. It speaks of whatever Neil Abram Josten and Andrew Joseph Doe are.

It is a kiss that speaks of everything.

8

Asoiaf meme (minor characters): (3/9) scenes ⟶ Stannis reads Lyanna Mormont’s letter to Jon

Jon took a knee. The king frowned at him, and rattled the parchment angrily. “Rise. Tell me, who is Lyanna Mormont?”

“One of Lady Maege’s daughters, Sire. The youngest. She was named for my lord father’s sister.”

“To curry your lord father’s favor, I don’t doubt. I know how that game is played. How old is this wretched girl child?”

Jon had to think a moment. “Ten. Or near enough to make no matter. Might I know how she has offended Your Grace?”

Stannis read from the letter. “Bear Island knows no king but the King in the North, whose name is STARK. A girl of ten, you say, and she presumes to scold her lawful king.” ― Jon I, A Dance with Dragons.