what she means: i don’t understand the concept of mermaid man and barnacle boy. are they supposed to be average sized humans? if they are then does that mean that spongebob and all the citizens of bikini bottom are actually human sized? how did they get so big? how come in the spongebob movie when spongebob and patrick are on the beach they are so tiny compared to david hasselhoff and the other people on the beach? are these regular sized human beings or are they actually giants? if they’re regular size then why are mermaid man and barnacle boy so tiny? how did they get that tiny?
“Ah, Saturday morning in Bikini Bottom. SpongeBob is watching his favorite Saturday morning show: The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. Enjoying a bowl of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Bran Cereal, and wearing the official Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy breakfast biters.”
—but with those sexy ass snaps that he sent you, there would also be some hella derpy ones too cause yah know… this is taehyung
—randomly saying lame but extremely cute pickup lines
—"can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back, babe.“
—and you going along with it sometimes
—"of course you little cute piece of shit…”
—other times, however………
—"tae baby, I love you but kindly shut the hell up, please.“
—CUDDLING IS LIKE A RELIGION TO HIM
—really sweet and soft kisses
—hella tongue action when he’s in the mood
—like literally his tongue can make you orgasm in like 4 seconds if he was that needy
—youre the “playful” couple
—always finding an excuse to touch you not even like sexually it’s like holding your hand, playing with your hair, thigh caressing, forehead kisses, etc etc
—eskimo kissing is a huge fuck yeah!!!
—hand kisses cause he’s a sweet lil gentlemen
—defiantly an a$$ kinda guy 🍑
—booty grabbing 👀
—ass slapping 💥👋
—anything with your ass he is totally down for it!!!
—handcuffs, lingerie, role play, strip teasing, blindfolds, voyeurism, ear muffs, mouth gagging, organism denial, breath play, you name it he is willing to do it cause he’s a kinky freak himself 👅💋👀
—not that vocal in bed bUT SOMETIMES HE JUST CANT HOLD HIMSELF BACK AMD WOOOOWW HIS GROANS AND MOANS ARE SUCH HUGE TURN-ONS FUCK YEA!!!
—random text early in the morning saying shit like “do pigeons have feelings?” “is it called sand cause it’s in the middle of the sea and land?” “if barnacles is a bad word in SpongeBob than what does that mean for barnacle boy???”
—defiantly wants to be a father ASAP
—fighting about what gender your first child will be
—"tae, I want a girl first…“
—"well, that’s gonna suck when we have a boy first, amirite?”
—which then lead to making out 😛
—which then leads to making out and more 😛
—the kind of bf that can never get enough of you like he is just so in love AWWWW 😊
—fckin’ hella jealous type 😳
—denies the shit out of it tho
—"just admit that you’re jealous and I’ll cancel on taemin tomorrow, okay?“
—"but that’s the thing, love. I’m NOT jealous!"
—gets set off by you even hanging out with one of the members for too long!!
—defiantly the boy you’d bring to meet your parents
—you support him in every way cause he needs that shit!! #protectmytaebby 😇
—stressful day at work= rough sex ✊💦
—then afterward, you’d stay up all night to talk about how his day went before slowly drifting off to sleep in his arms 💤💤
—he buys you anything and everything gucci cause that’s his favorite brand and "my love will always be wearing gucci cause that’s just how much she’s worth”
—seriously gucci produces prices are set to as high as 15M like I’m shookenth like ????????
—binge watching hwarang and fangirling whenever he comes on screen
—"OMO! TAE YOU LOOK SO GOOD WITH LONG HAIR!“
—"AHHHA! YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD ACTOR!”
—"baby, calm down…“
—"MY BOYFRIEND IS SO CUTE!!”
—"aww, thank you, but my girlfriend is soooo much cuter”
—attacks you with kisses
—like all the time!!
—pillow fights that are so hardcore sometimes you guys have to go out and buy brand new ones cause the last ones ripped open oops???? 😇
—always messing around together
—cooking turns into food wars 🍕🍟🍔
—baking turns into frosting fights 🍪🍰
—clothes shopping becomes a fashion show
—grocery shopping becomes “who can get to aisle 7 faster with a shopping cart”
—telling him everything that bothers you
—him telling you everything that bothers him
—not only would you be dating the best bf ever, but as well as your best friend and you’re so thankful for taehyung cause wow
—and of course, taehyung feels the same exact way. 😊✊ hwaiting~! 💗