pristinepastel said: Hey, i know you like the first mummy, but what about the mummy returns?
I HAVE RETURNED…after like a day.
but what the people want, the people get!
RIGHT SO THE MUMMY RETURNS!
aka the only sequel that is 1000% just as good as the first one. like holy shit.
ten years later and we meet our heroes again. rick and evie are happily married, going on adventures, and evie’s dream of becoming a respected scholar has come true and they’ve made a tiny human!
the only unrealistic part being that they only had one kid, i mean they are still all over each other ten years later and you’re telling me they only had ONE kid.
okay. sure jan.
but boy o’ boy is that one kid awesome!
alex o’connell. this kid is literally:
50% evie super-klutz-genius.
50% rick screams-at-things-that-are-illogical-to-scream-at.
50% uncle jonathan’s sheer dumb luck and wit.
10% i’m really bad at math.
you get the point. HE’S GREAT. also the actor passed on harry potter because, JUST LIKE ME, the mummy 1999 was his favorite movie and he just HAD to be in the sequel. alex is just such a smart-ass little shit. that much like his mother, accidentally brings about the apocalypse by opening something he shouldn’t have:
ARDETH BAY TIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. he has a much bigger role in this one. GOD BLESS.(because he was supposed to die in the first one, but test audiences loved him as much as we do, so they kept his fine ass around) he still looks prettier than everyone and is still so done with white people once again.
*after almost being killed on he bus* “this was my first bus ride.” *after realizing they’re gonna make him fly again* “why can’t you people ever keep your feet on the ground?”
he’s just such an awesome A+ friend goals, because while he probably needs to go be with other medjai to prepare for battle against anubis’ army (yikes), he stays with the fam to rescue alex. it wasn’t even much of a thought for him really, rick and evie just batted their eyelashes and he was like: *sighs* “these white people are always messing my shit up, but they are my white people.”
jonathan: still beautifully the same as ever. witty, clever, and would do anything for his family.
“be quiet alex! if there’s going to be any hysterics, they’ll come from me!”
“if you see anyone come running out screaming, it’s just me.”
when he boasts about being a good shot and ardeth is internally like “i’m gonna die.” THEN HE SAVES ARDETH. hell yeah.
rick: he’s still screaming at things. BUT IN DAD MODE. he’s the ultimate dad.
“you, lighten up. you, big trouble. you, get in the car.” *sweetly* “honey, what are you doing, these guys don’t use doors.” “knowing my brother-in-law, he probably deserves whatever you’re about to do to him, but this is my house and i have certain rules about snakes and dismemberment.”
evie: still a super-klutz nerd, but with C O N F I D E N C E. little baby librarian is now a honey badger of ASK ME IF I GIVE A FUCK! and also a re-incarnated princess
“no harm ever came from opening a chest.”
rick: “i swear that kid gets more and more like you every day.” evelyn: “you mean more attractive, sweet and devilishly charming?”
we meet izzy, another one of rick’s ex boyfriends, who is a much more reliable mode of transportation than previously mentioned murder buses.
imhotep: still emo. still wants to make out with his gf.
anck su namun/meela: hella good villain. she bomb af and 100% wants to take over the world. amazing. she actually has like a really cool role this time too!!! like so much screen time.
the rock…i mean the scorpion king, he’s another emo villain with goofy cgi rendering and like 4 million terrible made-for-TV spin off movies that you are lying if you haven’t watched at least one of them and felt that utter disappointment. but who cares the rock is pretty. and this was his first acting role and the reason we have him where he is today.
thank you mummy returns for giving the world actor rock johnson #blessed
THE ROMANCE AGAIN:
normal action movie sequel romance: same guy. different girl. repeat of first movie’s romance. hehehehhehehehhEHEHEHEHHEHH.
not here bitch.
rick and evie’s love has only grown stronger. they still bicker like old ladies at bingo night. the still look at each other like they hung the moon. they’re still disgusting jonathan because they CANNOT KEEP THEIR HANDS TO THEMSELVES. one kid my ass. they still support each other and protect each other like crazy. they love each other so much and it’s so healthy and pure and there is some good in this world mr. frodo.
the bottom line here is. what’s the point of watching the mummy 1999 if you aren’t going to watch the mummy returns immediately after?
I was feeling inspired for today’s quote of the day, by my best friend Jodi! We have so much love and appreciation The Mummy… “Hey Beni! Looks to me like you’re on the wrong side of the river!” … Rick O'Connell is hilarious, can just hear the way he says this line now 😂😍👏🏼🔥
As some of you may know, I am a South African. And as a South African who watches a whole lot of American TV, I have developed a pet peeve against having South African characters showing up in American TV shows because I can count on my one hand the amount of times they’ve gotten the accent right.
So, for those of you who don’t know, South Africans do not sound European, German, Dutch, or Australian, which are the accents normally given to South African characters, and it really greats my cheese.
South Africans have many unique accents, and they rarely ever actually get heard when South African characters show up on American TV (I don’t watch much British TV so I can’t speak for them)
Now, don’t get me wrong, I know South African accents are difficult, but it is not impossible to learn how to do them.
For those of you would like to hear what a South African accent really sounds like, you can find them here:
> Leverage s01e01 - Gina Bellman is amazing and her South African accent in this was so well done, I almost thought she was South African.
> Captain America: Civil War - Dear, sweet Chadwick Boseman did such a good job with his accent when he played T’Challa, and John Kahni, the actor who played King T’Chaka is a South African man, you can’t get an accent better than that.
> Avengers: Age of Ultron - When Andy Serkis showed up on screen as Ulyesses Klaue and opened his mouth a legit thought I was listening to a South African man speak. Imagine my surprise when I found out that he wasn’t one! Guys, I have not heard a better South African accent done by a non-South African than I what I heard coming from this man’s mouth.
> Voltron Legendary Defender S02E03 - Bet you guys weren’t expecting this one. Yes, my fellow Voltron fans, when you hear Ulaz speak, you are indeed listening to the voice of Arnold Vosloo, another South African man. Hearing his voice made me so happy, especially since he did not hide his accent as I have heard so man *cough - Charlieze Theron - cough* actors and actresses do.
So, there you have it people, don’t trust every South African accent you hear on screen, chances are you will be hearing some other accent.
ps: this was brought on by the addition of Doctor Becker on Chicago Med. She is supposedly South African. Her accent suggests that she lied about where she comes from coz it sure as heck ain’t South African