And I find comfort in that..

The Candle Meditation Technique

As you might have guessed, a candle meditation is practiced by gazing at a candle flame.

For some people this type of meditation is quite easy, as they find it easier to let go of thoughts when they are concentrating on a physical “thing” rather than on a mantra.

For others, this meditation can be a bit of a challenge - yes it can sometimes be tricky to keep your eyes open and focused on a candle without them blinking or watering. However, with a little practice, most people find that they gradually become very comfortable with this type of open-eye meditation.

One thing is for sure, this meditation is a fantastic way to improve your concentration skills, and it can lead you into a profoundly deep state of meditation if practiced properly.

Read on and I’ll tell you how to do this meditation the right way, and how to know when you have really succeeded at it!

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Because I’m an INTJ, I’m always concerned that I’m saying mean things without knowing or not caring enough about other people’s feelings, because this is what I do instinctively. I’m very direct and honest, but I found out that most people don’t find this comfortable. So my friends already know me and love me for that part of me, but whenever I meet new people, I try to not reveal this part of me at first, and act as concerned and loving as I can.
—  Submitted by aya34
Emma and the Deckhand

I’ve been bad and haven’t written a fic in a while. But inspiration hit me in the middle of the night and I had to write this down. I really hope you like it. It was a ton of fun to write.

What if evil!Charming hadn’t managed to kill deckhand!Killian, and he’d gotten away with Emma and Henry? How might have the story unfolded differently?


He was alive. She’d been so scared he wouldn’t be. But they’d all managed to get away from … her parents … just barely. And now they were back on his ship, sailing to find Regina. His ship was comforting. One of the few things in this world, besides Henry, that was still right. Emma was leaning up against the railing, a few feet away from Killian at the helm, letting the sound of the waves soothe her. After a moment, she pushed off of the side of the ship and turned to walk over to Killian. She hopped up onto the wooden support behind the ship’s wheel.

“Hey.” She smiled at Killian.

He gave an awkward smile back. He was so unlike her Killian. But she could still see the man she knew inside of him.

“I wanted to thank you.” She leaned forward slightly. “For risking your life back there.”

“Well, I, ah, couldn’t just let your boy die now, could I?” He replied, without the bravado his counterpart might’ve had.

“Still. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

It felt strange to not have him say ‘love’ at the end of every sentence. It was silent for a moment. Not an awkward silent. Well, at least not for Emma. She was watching him and he was trying to not watch her, just facing forward as he sailed the Jolly Roger.

After about a minute, he swallowed thickly and looked over at her. “So … ” He seemed like he wasn’t quite sure what to say or how to say it. Whatever it was. “I believe we left off with you telling me about your world. It seemed … interesting.”

Emma laughed softly. “Yeah, interesting is a good word for it.”

“Could you tell me more?” He kept his hook on the wheel to make sure the ship didn’t stray from its course.

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Your Secret Is Safe
  • Your Secret Is Safe
  • Atli Örvarsson
  • The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (Original Motion Picture Score)
Play

This, in my opinion, is probably the most striking 30 seconds of the entire City of Bones film score. This little understated gem was hidden in the film beneath a scene that really didn’t do it any sort of justice, unable to be fully appreciated, but by itself is the single most beautiful and haunting thing on the entire album.

I listen to it often when writing, as it feels so inherently human - pain, truth, raw vulnerability, hope. It sounds like Max Lightwood, and how our heroes returned from battle to find the Lightwoods openly grieving in the Accords hall. It also sounds like Magnus and Alec - the private, intimate conversations of love and comfort and sadness we have yet to see between them. It’s the sound of Jace’s heart breaking as he learns Clary, the one person he has ever wanted for himself, is someone he can never have. It’s the sound of Isabelle’s tears as Simon gives up his immortality. It’s the sound of Simon’s undeath, of knowing he and Clary will be forever separated in the ways that make them human. It’s the sound of Raphael’s sacrifice, and the sound of Magnus sitting all alone, having cut Alec free. It’s the sound of Tessa and Jem watching Jace play the piano at Jocelyn’s wedding, reminded of Will.

It’s so little, and yet so much at the same time, and it always brings me to tears. This small moment of music is my most favourite thing from The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones, and even though it was part of a film that failed to deliver on so many things, it’s an important piece of the Mortal Instruments world for me.

No Matter What the Day

Fandom: Naruto
Rating: K+
Characters: Naruto and Hinata
Length: One-shot.
Summary: She draws her strength from his smile. He draws his from her laugh.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto.

A/N: I fell in love with Naruto’s character song that when I first heard it, I was so inspired to write - thus this was born! I hardly write in present tense, so a lot of the wording here is going to be kinda awkward.

———

She wakes up three hours after midnight to find the spot on his bed empty. Groggily, she sits up, limbs popping in disagreement at the sudden movement. It takes her quite a while to process her own actions, but eventually she tosses her legs over the comforter and puts on her slippers. Quietly and still out-of-sorts she paddles her way to the dim lighting of their living room, tugging her large shirt closer to her frame. Winter is approaching.

She finds her fiance hunched over a stack of papers with various scrolls surrounding him. His prosthetic arm clutches onto the white handle of his porcelain mug, with him taking occasional sips. He hasn’t noticed her standing by the door-frame, engrossed in his own world. She decides to give him time and chooses to watch him - she has watched him for so long, a few more moments hardly mattered.

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2

Edward John Barrington Douglas-Scott-Montagu, 3rd Baron Montagu of Beaulieu, photographed in 1946 (© National Portrait Gallery, London) and more recently in his musuem.
Sad news today that Baron Montagu of Beaulieu has died peacefully at his home, aged 88, after a short illness. In addition to being a motoring enthusiast who established the the National Motor Museum at Beaulieu, the Baron was a bisexual who was convicted and imprisoned in 1954 for homosexual sex, a charge he denied. In a 2000 interview he stated, “My attraction to both sexes neither changed nor diminished at university and it was comforting to find that I was not the only person faced with such a predicament. I agonised less than my contemporaries, for I was reconciled to my bisexuality, but I was still nervous about being exposed.” In 1954 he was charged with performing “gross offences” with an RAF serviceman during a weekend party at the beach hut on his country estate. Montagu always maintained he was innocent of this charge “We had some drinks, we danced, we kissed, that’s all”. Nevertheless, he was imprisoned for twelve months for “consensual homosexual offences” along with Michael Pitt-Rivers and Peter Wildeblood. The trial caused a backlash of opinion among some politicians and church leaders that led to the setting up of the Wolfenden Committee, which in its 1957 report recommended the decriminalisation of homosexual activity in private between two adults. Ten years later, Parliament finally carried out the recommendation, a huge turning point in gay history in Britain. In a 2007 interview, when asked if he felt that he and his co-defendants had been instrumental in the decriminalisation of homosexuality in Britain, Lord Montagu said, “I am slightly proud that the law has been changed to the benefit of so many people. I would like to think that I would get some credit for that. Maybe I’m being very boastful about it but I think because of the way we behaved and conducted our lives afterwards, because we didn’t sell our stories, we just returned quietly to our lives, I think that had a big effect on public opinion.”

He made the world a better place for both car enthusiasts and homosexuals, may he rest in peace

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Douglas-Scott-Montagu,_3rd_Baron_Montagu_of_Beaulieu

Between grueling production schedules, traveling, and creating content for her lifestyle site Amore & Vita, it’s hard to believe Shay Mitchell has any time for herself, let alone 20 minutes to squeeze in a workout. But despite her often busy and ever-changing schedule, the Pretty Little Liars actress has made health and fitness an integral part of her everyday life. So much so, she even joined the athleisure design game, creating a collection for Kohl’s calledFit to Wander. Created with the girl-on-the-go in mind, the 19-piece line features stylish and comfortable silhouettes you can take from your morning gym session to afternoon brunch. So just how does she do it all? We caught with Mitchell (in between workouts) to find out. Keep reading for our exclusive interview.  

Byrdie: What influenced you to make fitness such a big part of your life?
Shay Mitchell: Well, for me, it’s all about balance. A lot of people that know me know that I absolutely love food, pizza in particular. I work out not only to balance food, but also to keep my mind focused. And for me, that comes in many different forms. It can be taking a walk outside, boxing, or going to dance. Anything physical has such a positive impact on people; the dopamine and serotonin that get released when you work out—afterward, you feel amazing.

B: Was that the catalyst for designing your own athleisure line?
SM: I really wanted to do an athleisure line because I feel my best after I’m done working out. And another thing on top of that was I’ve tried on so many different workout brands, but I was finding that there were certain things I was looking for that I could never find. You know, for the sports bra, I always felt like it would cut me off at a certain angle and then for pants, they were always falling down when I was spinning. So I was always taking notes of things I wanted to find, and then I was like, you know, “I could just do it myself.” I came up with Fit to Wander, and it was a name I loved because it wasn’t specific to just being worn at the gym or when you are working out; it can be worn from boot camp to brunch. And for me, I never know what’s going to happen in my day, it’s always changing, so I wanted to be able to wear something you can take from morning to night, and that’s how it came about. I wanted to put a special note from me in the collection, so I put positive affirmations in every single piece. I just think it has such a great impact on the rest of the day when you read them.

B: Do you have a favorite piece?
SM: I would say the wrap with the hood. It has thumbholes on the inside, an extra-long hood so you can really cover up, and the material is so soft. It’s the perfect-size wrap, and I’ve probably worn that more times than anything.

B: Will we see a second collection?
SM: Yes! Clothes for me are so fun, especially with different seasons; you get to play around with different colors. It’s going to be fun, and I’ve already started working on it, and I’m very excited about it.

B: How do you tone up?
SM: I have to switch it up because I get bored, so I’ll try different classes. Cardio for me is a spin class. I think it’s great. I get so amped up with other people in the room, and there’s just a really good energy about it. So I’ll usually start with a spin class, then it will be something like weights or working out with my amazing trainer—we do a mix of Pilates and leg toning. And then I’ll go take a Body by Simone class. There are so many amazing classes here in L.A., but my favorite is boxing. I love it because there is the cardio at the beginning, and then we’re sparring afterward and then we do stretching and weights.

B: Have you tried any unusual workouts?
SM: I have tried the aerial workout. It was amazing; I’d love to get more into it. Pole dancing was a really good workout. Not going to lie, it was really hard and I felt it the next day. There are so many amazing apps where you can sign up and see what’s going on. For me, it’s about trying everything from rock climbing to dancing to martial arts. It’s finding what you like and mixing it with other things you like.

B: What’s your secret to staying fit when you’re working so much?
SM: If you can’t fit a workout in, it does really come down to your eating. Me being on set, I drink a lot of water. I try to opt out of coffee and drink green tea instead. There are always options. But I have my certain favorite things with me all the time when I’m on set. And when I’m craving something sweet, I’ll have my pineapple chips or always make sure to eat a salad before I have something else just so I’ll be a little more full and not want double up on the main course. I think it’s just finding a balance and not cutting anything out. I hate that; I hardly ever diet. I think it is just about making smart choices when you can’t get a workout in.

B: You mentioned pineapple chips; what are some more of your favorite guilt-free snacks?
SM: I’m a pro at making kale chips. I know that was all the rage a while ago, but I still think I make the best ones. I do Brussels sprout chips quite a bit, and I make fruit schikabobs, as I call them. They are like fruit skewers, and I will always have them in my fridge because they are easy to grab and go. And then watermelon with cinnamon.

B: How do you navigate the craft-service table?
SM: It’s called sharing. So instead of having my own, I’ll share with Ashley Benson. She’s probably my food partner in crime, so if she’s craving something, I’ll be like, “Let’s split it.” That’s how I do the craft table.

B: You’ve only got 20 minutes to work out. What do you do?
SM: Sprints. I’ll just go out on my street or find a good staircase and run up and down it. Twenty minutes is definitely enough.

B: Do you have a favorite do-anywhere exercise?
SM: Just taking a skipping rope with you wherever you are is such a good idea because it’s such an amazing workout. It’s the easiest, and I can bring it with me anywhere. And you only need a small amount of space.

B: What’s the best tip you’ve received from your trainer Gunnar?
SM: He is all about eating well, too. I’ll go to him and get the most insane workout, and then afterward, he’ll be like, “Okay, Shay, you can’t go and have pizza the minute you walk out this door. You have to eat well.” He is all about taking your workout with you on the go. He knows how much I travel, so it was his idea to take the jumping rope and to do squats in the hotel room.


[SOURCE]

1. I fucking miss you a lot and you’re the only one who pulls me out when I’m in over my head and I need you right now because I think I’m drowning. I just need your support.

2. I’m glad you’re happier now, I really am, but I’m not happier without you here and I don’t know how you don’t feel this ache that I feel.

3. Your face is on a loop and it keeps flashing over and over again in my head and sometimes I yell, “STOP,” but most of the time I just let it be because I find comfort in you. I love you.

—  Journal Entry #124. - Three texts I will never send.

Happy birthday to Kiyotaka Ishimaru!!

I’m so happy such a wonderful person was born today, he’s so important to me and so many other people out there. Countless times has he helped me feel more confident and comfortable with myself and helped me find the motivation to keep going with the things I’m passionate about. Who cares if he’s fictional, that doesn’t make him any less special and close to my heart. C:

(I’m gonna finish the inking eventually but I know I can’t get it done today, so here you are anyway. I’ll get it done ASAP though, that’s a promise!!)

anonymous asked:

I always wondered in s1 when carmilla and Laura had similar dreams if they were actually literally in the same dream. Like Laura said there was a "dark prowling thing" under her bed and I always took that as carmilla in her cat form protecting Laura from the vampires but she has no idea about cat carmilla yet so she finds it scary instead of comforting. And after that Laura keeps dreaming about the black cat and those are the nights carmilla doesn't sleep well. If it was confirmed I missed it

I thought the first time it happened it was just Carmilla watching Laura’s videos and messing with her. Though I don’t think I’ve really discussed that with anyone so I don’t know.

Also I don’t know if this was ever confirmed or not, but I know fandom was talking about Carmilla literally protecting Laura from her bad dreams which was why she was so tired in 1.30. Because rather than actually sleeping she was helping Laura with her nightmares. Again I don’t know if this was confirmed or denied (or unanswered), I forget. But that’s a theory I know exists.

Don’t

Original Request: I’m going through a really rough break-up and was wondering if you could do a fluffy Deanxreader where the reader comes home to the bunker and he comforts her and admits his feelings for her and stuff? I love your writing so much ><

Word Count: 544

Summary: The reader runs into an ex on a hunt, leaving her a bit shaken. Dean finds a way to help her forget about the past and helps her move on to happier times.

NOTE: I DONT REMEMBER HOW TO WRITE AMSLDRASKDFNASEKRASD. Seriously. I’m so out of shape. I have no clue if this is any good or not, but when I got the request I thought I might stretch my legs a little. I went through a bad break up a while back and stories really helped me, so I wanted to help. I just happened to be in a writing mood, but I hope that I’m not insensitive! I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS YOU GUYS.

The bunker door slammed behind you and you jumped slightly. Your nerves were shaken, and it wasn’t because you were fighting monsters every day. You slowly made your way to your room, each foot barely lifting as you stepped. You could hear Dean and Sam call after you, but you shrugged them off.

Not right now.

You changed clothes quickly, hoping to get the memory of the hunt off you as fast as you could. Even after slipping into the most comfortable, lazy clothes you still felt wound up. You sat on your bed and sighed softly.

Why did it have to be him?”

“[Y/N]?”

Dean’s voice accompanied a light tapping at your door. It shook you from your train of thought.

“Eh—Come in,” you said as you cleared your throat, attempting to hide the fact you were close to tears.

Dean stepped in tentatively. He wasn’t the softest man you knew, but when it counted he was there. There was something about him that put you at ease. Most of the time, at least. Now it just made you uncomfortable. He was someone you admired. Someone you wanted to emulate. Impress. And you made a complete fool out of yourself.

Dean had been the start of new life away from your ex hunting partner/boyfriend. A toxic relationship that ended on pretty bad terms. You had sworn off hunting with partners after the split, but the Winchesters changed your mind quickly.

A partnership was formed with the brothers. A strong one. A healthy one. As healthy as hunting evils of the world can be. You felt like you could trust them, a feeling you never felt with your ex. Those led to your feelings toward the elder Winchester growing. Feelings that you weren’t sure you would ever surface.

“Hey—Um,” Dean said slowly. “Just wanted to check up on you. I know it ain’t easy seeing an ex and all…”

“Seeing an ex is different than having your ex destroy your hunt,” you said softly. “Made me look like an idiot, Dean.”

“That guy was a dick,” Dean spat flatly. “You can hunt circles around him. He just had dumb luck tonight. I don’t see what you saw in him.”

“Me either.”

“Anyone who would dump you is a friggin’ moron,” Dean said, fueling the momentum you two had built up. He didn’t realize what he said until you stopped talking. He looked over, wide eyed.

“I’m sorry… I mean, if you have feelings for him still—“

“Hell no,” you growled.

“Did I say something wrong then?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve never heard you so passionate about relationships before,” You looked at your hands. The scars from hunts glared back at you. Hands no one would want to hold again. Suddenly, Dean’s hand slipped into the very ones you were staring at.

Your eyes darted upwards to him, but his eyes were still downcast.

“Don’t…” he whispered but didn’t finish.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t let him make you feel this way. Not while I’m here.” Dean’s grip tightened. “Let me show you how much better off you are without him.”

He finally looked into your eyes, a smile brimming at the corners of his mouth.

“And with me.”

In an instant you were in his arms. In an instant the hunt was gone. In an instant you felt like you had found solid ground again.

anonymous asked:

I was thinking hard about what happens to unromanced fenris after the end of the game and I get so sad? Like he finally has a home, friends he can count on and then every one gets separated aside from whoever hawke romances. I just get so upset about it that I don't think I can romance anyone else cuz I really would hate if he'd have to be alone again or apart from Hawke.

;;;_____;;; cry my tears, fenris being alone is  10000% never-gonna-happen, can u imagine him at the end of his quest during Act 3 being like ‘ i am alone’ and not having hawke comfort him afterwards (idk what happen rly bc i always romance him…) 

but i’d also like to think that he find affections with the relationship that he has with the gang, like bethany…. and aveline(who makes him smile by kick slavers’ asses) or even isabela, when she manages to pull out a laugh from him.

xxthevampirediariesexpertxx asked:

Are you comfortable with pictures of NSFW? Like using them in your imagines and stuff? Maybe you can start imagines with visuals? Are you comfortable with that??

I personally love them lol adds to the experience but I feel like the majority of people would find it really jolting and might not be ready for visuals especially my younger followers (which don’t read my filthy smut pls lmao).

Ok I’m also glad you brought this up because I was originally going to do an actual dick pic in the nate au but for the above reasons I thought it would startle people and a bulge was more palatable for the masses. But if my freaky followers want nsfw shit hit me up and I’ll see what we can arrange 😏

don3dmodelling asked:

Hi, this may seem a stupid question (if so then I'm sorry), but do you have to be a good texture artist to be a good 3D modeller?

it is highly desirable in the industry -and I can’t stress that enough- that a modeler also knows their way around texturing. They both go hand in hand. 

I know they’re both different beasts and takes a while to master each, so I suggest you GIT GUD with modeling, and when you get to a comfortable place with it, then GO HAM on the ins and outs of texturing. Find a style (photo-realistic, hand-painted, or hybrid) and make it your thing. I suggest you pick a style that reflects the company you would really love to work for.

Hope this helps! :D

I miss you like mornings miss the moon,
Like a little girl misses her mother of the first day of preschool,
I miss you vigorously.
My bones ache like they’ve been strung too tight this time.
My body misses the way your lips feel against it,
My lips miss the way your body feels against them.
I miss the sound of your voice in person,
The way it dips comfortably as your tongue finds the right place to sit in your mouth,
I miss your mouth.
Your hands.
Your eyes.
I miss you like this.
—  I Miss You by Macey Giles
Who Do I Have To Kill Now?

Pairing: Mason Hewitt x Reader

Request: Can you please do a mason imagine where it’s totally platonic &you’re his best friend and so much like a mother to him so he bring boys that he likes &basically asks for the readers approval & he finds a boy that he really likes &he introduces u to him after u tell mason that u don’t like him &u get into a fight because he really likes him maybe a week after they’re dating mason sees him kissing another boy so her goes to the reader &the reader is like wtf (bc mason is crying) so she’s like  who do I have to kill? &mason tells the reader everything &the reader comforts him as she’s like a mom to him

Requested by: Anonymous (:

AUTHOR’S NOTE: I really hoped I did a good job with this one! I really loved that you requested one with Mason! He’s a cute addition to the Teen Wolf Family (: Thanks for the request. Enjoy xx

“I think I found a winner” your best friend, Mason told you. You and him were sitting in your living room, catching up. You rolled your eyes, “You say that overtime you see a cute boy” you replied. “This time I think it’s true!” he said. “What’s he like?” you asked. “He’s tall, short blonde hair, green eyes, athletic but nerdy looking” Mason told you. “He doesn’t sound like your type” you admitted. “Having specific types, is so yesterday” Mason replied. “Have you even talked to him?” you asked. “Uhhhh, no… Not yet” he confessed. “Talk to me when you have talked to him” you said.

THREE DAYS LATER…

“Y/N, I’m bring Daniel over to your house so you can meet him. I need your approval” Mason told you over the phone. “No Mason! You do this to me all the time, so no!” you said back. “Too late” Mason said and then hung up the phone. “Damnit Mason” you said to yourself. You had no time to prepare, Mason would be here any minute. This happened a lot, Mason would find a boy that he thinks was “the winner” and he’d bring him over to introduce you and you start to like them and the next thing you know, they stopped seeing each other. Mason would always ask for your approval, which was sweet but you seemed to fall for them more than Mason did.

The doorbell rang and you took your time to answer it. Mason was standing there with a tall, weird looking guy. “Y/N, this is Daniel. Daniel this is Y/N” Mason said, introducing the two of you. You shook Daniel’s hand and right away you could tell he was bad news. There was something about him that seemed off, he seemed like a sneaky guy. Definitely not good enough for Daniel. You tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, you just met him.

“So, Daniel. How did you meet Mason?” you asked. Obviously not from school because you’ve never seen him before. “At a night club” he replied. You looked at Mason and gave him the evil eye, “I told you not to go there anymore” you whispered to him. “You’re being dramatic” he whispered back. Daniel seemed like he was a player, the whole time you guys were talking he seemed to be too cool for words, he was slouching in his seat, and he was very disrespectful. You hated this guy and you hated saying that. Mason was all lovey dovey with him, staring at him and smiling, it made you sick. You couldn’t wait until this gathering was over. Daniel wasn’t the person you wanted for Mason and you were going to make sure tell Mason that. “I gotta get going, I have to practice for my lacrosse game. I’m the number one scorer so I’m pretty important” Daniel said. You rolled your eyes again, “Good for you” you mumbled, Mason heard you and shot you a look. “I’m going to take him to practice and then I’ll swing by again” Mason told you. “See you later, nice meeting you Daniel” you said.

You didn’t know how you were going to tell Mason that Daniel was a jerk and a player. You didn’t know much about him, yet you knew enough. Mason was sensitive, so you had no idea how you were going to break the news. He always came to you for approval so this shouldn’t be that difficult.

Mason came back, thirty minutes later. He walked into your house all confident and smiley and laid on your couch. “So? What did you think?” he asked you, still grinning ear to ear. “Mase, he’s not a winner” you said, letting him down gently. “What are you talking about? He’s great” Mason said. “No, he’s really not. He’s a jerk, stuck up, disrespectful, cocky and a player.” “How would you know, you spent the whole conversation rolling your eyes and not paying attention!” Mason replied, defensively. “I was listening to every single thing that annoying guy said” you responded. “How come you don’t want me to be happy?” Mason asked you. “Oh please, Mason. If you think that, then you have something wrong with you” you answered. “Every time I bring someone by to meet you, you hate them!” he said. “That’s not true, I liked Dylan, Brad, Tanner and even Ty. They were all nice, not like this loser Daniel” you shouted to Mason. “That is the last time I ever ask for you approval” Mason shouted back. “Mason. He’s a tool. I bet he flirts with every guy he sees. I just have a feeling he’s bad news” you told Mason, in a calmer tone. “I don’t care what you think. You don’t know anything” Mason yelled at you, he stormed off and left your house. “Well that went well” you said to yourself.

You and Mason weren’t speaking. You were mad at him for being angry at you. He was angry at you for not “letting him be happy.” It was a mess. It was weird for the two of you to fight, you always got along quite well. You were two peas in a pod, the two amigos. He was your best friend in this entire world and you felt all alone. There were many times where you picked up your phone to call Mason, but you stopped yourself, remembering the fight. You were upset that Mason didn’t think you wanted him to find his happiness. Of course you did, that’s all you wanted! Maybe you were too overprotective, maybe you didn’t give Daniel an actual shot. You wanted a re-do.

You text Mason and told him you’d give Daniel another chance. Mason text back agreeing to this second chance. You told Mason to bring Daniel over again. You swallowed your pride and tried to like Daniel. You listened to every word he said, every lame story, every conceited story, you listened to it all. You fake laughed many times, you even fake smiled, and Mason seemed to be believing it. “It’s late, time to go” Daniel said. “You go to the car, I want to speak to Y/N real quick” Mason replied. Daniel left the house. “You’re a bad faker” said Mason, who looked angry. “What?” you said pretending to not know what he’s talking about. “I can tell when you’re lying or faking. You still hate him. I can’t believe this Y/N. Just be happy for me” Mason said, storming out of your house again. “I TRIED” you yelled.
Word on the street was that your best friend, Mason was now officially dating Daniel. Mason didn’t tell you because the two of you haven’t talked since the re-do night. Whatever, you didn’t care. But that was a lie, it was tugging at your heart strings, the fight with you and Mason. You hated not talking to him every day, he made everything better. You missed him, even though you wouldn’t admit it.

That night there was a loud knock at your bedroom door, you slowly got up and looked out your window. Mason was at your bedroom patio, crying. You opened the door, “Mase?” you asked. “I’m a complete idiot. You were right all along” he blubbered. Mason can be sensitive, but you’ve never seen him cry, especially not like this. He couldn’t stop crying, tears were streaming all down his face, and he was a mess. “Who do I have to kill?” you asked, giving him a much needed hug. “Daniel” he replied. You broke the hug up and got serious. “What happened?” you demanded to know. “I caught him kissing another boy” Mason confessed. “I KNEW HE WAS A PIG” you shouted, “Sorry” you apologized to Mason who was heartbroken. You walked him to your bed, you let him cry on your shoulder. “There, there” you said, stroking his hair. “I should have listened to you. You could tell he was a tool, so why couldn’t I?” Mason asked you. “Because, I wasn’t into him. He sweet talked you, not me. You really liked him so you weren’t able to see the true him” you said, trying your best to comfort your best friend.

“I’m sorry I got so mad at you, I’m sorry we haven’t spoken in a while. I didn’t mean for this to happen” said Mason. “I missed you Mason, so much. I’m glad that you aren’t with him anymore though.” “Me too, I don’t want someone who sucks other guys’ faces” he confessed. You laughed, “Next time I tell you a boy is no good, please trust me. I’m always right” you told him, giving him a playful wink. “I’ll listen next time, trust me” he replied.

“Why are you the best?” Mason asked you. “It’s a gift” you responded. It was nice that you and Mason reconciled everything and it was even nicer knowing that Daniel was out of Mason’s life, you just felt bad that your poor friend was in so much pain. “I sure did hate him” you whispered.

Story time: I was on a plane on my way to visit family back home. Handsome bloke next to me starts up a convo. We get along nicely. He starts asking to hang out once we get to the city. He says he can offer me a ride into the city. At this point we are talking like “old friends.” He made me feel #comfortable. He made me #smile. But my instincts flared up and my lower tummy started getting antsy and tight and hot. INSTINCTS. I said “no.” He immediately got #upset. He took personal offense to it. The stewardess had noticed our kindly convo. She winked at him and began helping him pressure me to ride with him! Even though I declined like 10 times, they pressured me until I said #maybe (to get her to fuck off, knowing I was going to find a way out). We get to the airport and he insists upon escorting me to the baggage claim. I went to the washroom to collect my thoughts and get my wits straight. He was waiting for me outside the bathroom door. I kindly but firmly rejected him and told him I wasn’t going with him no matter what he said. I can hardly put into words the anger and malicious energy that was rolling out from this guy. He pressured me again and I basically told him to fuck off and walked away. The only reason I was nice is b/c I thought he had a weapon. It’s soooo easy to peg victims as weaklings or like they’re stupid or live a high risk lifestyle. I don’t have to give a disclaimer here to describe how I am none of those things. But girls & guys as well get #cornered into situations. There is #fight and #flight, but it is scientifically proven that there is also #paralysis - and for some reason no one talks about it. Psychologists & scientists acknowledge it but the general public does not. Victims will freeze up like a deer in headlight when they are in a life or death situation - #perpetrators know that & they will #manipulate #bully #sooth #coax you in whatever way they can to have their way. If you ever see a situation like what I described above happening to someone, please #HELP the person being victimized or manipulated. They are experiencing #paralysis or falling into their #limbicsystem and they need help. #community #support #mmiw #staystrong

i’m finding the most unexpected comfort in voice recordings and videos and sky pics and silly selfies. sort of like being here for myself has turned into this v personal thing where i talk to myself and just go through the thoughts and then feel/love myself lots. ill listen to the stuff i say and i know where it’s coming from, and i just want to pluck it out and kiss it and hold it soft. also, a lot of things are starting to feel v whatever. i’m coming to this point where its very “well this is it and idk, but might as well do me cause who gives a shit”. also wanna be stubborn and see this through. 

anonymous asked:

I identify as genderqueer, but I know it's an umbrella term. Is that okay? I identify as neither, then both, then more feminine then masculine; so I feel like it's the one I feel more comfortable. Is that okay? I feel like ppl won't take me seriously

Hi there! It’s definitely find to use genderqueer as an identity term for yourself - for a lot of folks, it sums up their feelings very well as not identifying as 100% man / woman. Gender fluidity might be something else for you to look into, but it isn’t necessary to describe yourself as anything else besides genderqueer if you don’t gel with it. I have identified as genderqueer for several years now. Although there are more specific ways I could describe it, and do get into if people really want to know where I’m at gender-wise, genderqueer is still the term that resonates with me the most.

~Marilyn