2

“His fingers touched the strings, and all my thoughts were displaced. The sound was pure and sweet as water, bright as lemons. It was like no music I had ever heard before. It had warmth as a fire does, a texture and weight like polished ivory. It buoyed and soothed at once.”

- Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles, page 34

2

so those student athlete memes huh

Alternative Titles for the Iliad

1-Hello Naughty Trojans it’s Murder Time

2-100 Times a Therapist was Needed

3-This War Really Wasn’t Worth it

4-Fight Club but it’s just Achilles

5-Patroclus Didn’t Deserve this

6-Things Historians Pretend aren’t Gay

7-Nothing Means Anything we’re all Going to Die

8-Hector Gets his Ass Handed to Him

9-There is no Heterosexual Explanation for This

10-Fuck it up, Achilles

11-Someone is Responsible for this but not Helen

actual Proof that patroclus and achilles are Soft Boyfriends™

  • achilles once woke patroclus up by pRESSING THEIR NOSES TOGETHER 
  • that was so gay i cannot and Will Not put up with this
  • achilles: *tries to get patroclus’ attention by fucking juggling figs*
  • patroclus literally Officially became achilles’ number 1 dude when they were like 13 can i live
  • was i dreaming when patroclus described achilles’ lips to be like BEES what the hell why are they so small and cute
  • not only handjobs but handjobs A) under the constellations and B) on achilles’ 16th bday
  • they played together in the lake and wrestled each other and hung off of tree branches on the Magic Mountain that patroclus risked everything to follow achilles to !!!!!!
  • “now i know how to make you follow me anywhere” shuT
  • achilles tending to the wounds on patroclus’ feet after he hurt himself because he found out about the prophecy :-((
  • tiny achilles highkey avoiding sleeping with one of the servant girls because he was highkey crushing on patroclus
  • these boys just love each other so much and are so small and so sweet and so In Love

In Ancient Greek we don’t say “I love you” we say “εἰ δὲ θανόντων περ καταλήθοντ’ εἰν Ἀΐδαο αὐτὰρ ἐγὼ καὶ κεῖθι φίλου μεμνήσομ' ἑταίρου.” which translates into “And though the dead forget the dead in the house of Hades, even there I shall still remember my beloved companion.” and I think that is beautiful.