Context: One of our campaign members (samurai) had just finished 1v1ing a bugbear, and was looting his remains while the other two (myself (sorcerer) and another member (ranger)) told him what to loot

Samurai: I loot his corpse, what do I find?

Ranger: Take his swimming pool-

DM: You find some dried meat, almost like jerky, and a cock ring-

Ranger and Sorcerer: Take his cock ring!

Samurai: I do NOT take his cock ring that is his forever

DM: You take the cock ring, it fits around your wrist

there’s a lot of stuff about lance’s ethnicity i’ve seen where he’s cuban and stuff but i’m gonna slide in my own headcanons over here where he is … … will smith pose ‘indonesian’ or more exactly, ‘balinese’.

  • i’ve seen the picture of lance’s family and i sort of see it as a mixed race family, which leads me to believe lance is mixed.
  • lots of people i know who live in bali have parents who are indonesian and foreign (usually from america or from europe or sometimes from east asia).
  • lance is probably half indonesian/balinese and half something else (i’m leaning towards american but u know whatever floats ur boat)
  • honestly if someone were to put a bunga kamboja in his hair i’d start crying bc he looks so good in it im cry
  • bali is an island surrounded by water and it’s people (as well as the majority of indonesia) are deemed as a very hospitable, warm, and open to new people. (proof here also i live here so)
  • which probably explains why lance was chosen by the most accepting lion, and they’re the guardian of water and bali and indonesia in its entirety is surrounded by water.
  • i hc that his dad was a pilot for normal planes that carry people from country to country for vacations and stuff (coughs he was a pilot for garuda coughs) and he’d probably bring lance and his family on a lot of plane rides from place to place (lance’s favorite place was probably varadero beach bc lance loves beaches but some beaches in bali are really dirty bc that’s sort of a general thing here in indonesia, we’re working on it)
  • okay but consider lance playing soccer everywhere because he used to do that as a kid in the streets of bali asldjfndsaf
  • lance, leaving the house with sandals on: guys i’m going to the nearby mosque/temple to do stuff 
    keith probably or someone else: oh okay see you later
    lance, upon returning: (is barefoot) don’t.
    other person: what happened
    lance: dON’T.
  • lance has probably lost his sandals twenty times already and he’s ready to file a fucking lawsuit. (it’s a thing here where apparently you gotta name your sandals when you go to a religious place where you have to take off your shoes or else they’ll be stolen, my uncle has filed a complaint to a nearby police station about this to which the police replied with ‘it’s happened to me fifteen times before’ lmao sometimes even if you do name them they’ll just fucking disappear)
  • he literally looks like a drawn version of my balinese friend but that’s irrelevant
  • when lance swings his hips all i can think of is the traditional balinese dance, also notably the way he moves throughout the entire show reminds me of the traditional balinese dance. (you can see a video of it here, i especially see lance in the baris warrior dance (starts at 2:43 in the video) which ‘depicts the courage of a man going to war’)
  • TO
  • WAR.

Originally posted by letpidgesayfuck

like despite the high kicks i can sort of see it aadsfjnladsfn r u sure you’re ready for war lance

things that are banned from the attic (nursey & dex)
  • ok the first thing to go: nursey breaks up with some douchebag his junior year (he and dex get r&h’s dibs ofc) and he literally plays like needed me by rihanna on repeat for weeks until dex is like “WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO GET YOU TO STOP BLASTING THAT SONG LITERALLY I DONT CARE I WILL SUCK YOUR DICK NURSEY” and like… its right at the end of the song….. and like ….there is an extended silence………..and then nursey just grins and says “promise?” and dex wants to jump out the window but also throw nursey out of it & long story short chowder has to pry dex off of the window sill & its traumatic. rihanna is banned.
  • dex likes to watch like, tutorials on how to fucking build porches and desks and like comparisons between cedar or oak and like weird shit, right? and nursey hates it bc hell come home and dex is just sitting there intensely watching this dude talk about plywood for 20 minutes like its interesting when HE has things to talk about. he gets so fed up that he literally closes dexs laptop w/o his permission and is like “if u think fucking clark martin’s 21 subscriber ass is more important than me uve got another thing fucking coming poindexter” and they get into a screaming fight at 2am and. home improvement tutorials are banned.
  • nursey starts lowkey banging this lax bro and his cologne is super fucking pungent. also dex is allergic to it. he lays down in nurseys bed and breaks out in hives. its the lax bro or dex. lax bros are banned.
  • nursey also rlly likes candy and he has the biggest sweet tooth & he loves lollipops. u kno where im going with this. dex sees him eat one, one time. instant ban.
  • dex does some stalking on nurseys facebook & learns that 14 year old nursey was ready 2 hop on gerard way’s cock hardcore. so. hence the 100+ pictures of gerard way plastered all over everything nursey owns. banned under the threat of nursey moving into chowders room.
  • dex got into 7th heaven bc of jack their freshman year ((i have this weird headcanon that jacks really only caught up with the 90s the rest is beyond him)) & now he watches it when he misses him so in retaliation nursey watches martin bc theres like no poc in 7th heaven dex & basically they have a 90s sitcom fight is what im saying & it ends with nursey trying to drown out sister sister w/ seinfeld & its a hot fucking mess, so. 90s sitcoms = BANNNNED.
  • any and all mention of the 2016 winter screw. u dont want 2 kno. fuckin unspoken rule right there, brah. banned for the sake of their friendship.
  • the words “fight me” under any circumstances. dex said it once & they accidentally broke nurseys desk chair. then he said it another time & they broke a lamp. but it got banned bc tbh nursey popped a boner one time & that was weird. banned under the pretense that they keep breaking things.
  • any and all memes past 3am or before 12pm, banned 4 self preservation on nurseys part. ((this includes roadies, he doesnt want to talk abt it))
  • the words “no homo” (dex) followed by “yes homo” (nursey). banned right after the first time they kiss. ((then again after they fuck))



Sebastian meets Enhamed. 


- Did he ever tell you what that “S” means?
- The House of El.
- Yes, but, it also stands for a Kryptonian phrase, our family motto. “El mayarah.” It means “Stronger together”. You say people will see me the way they see Superman one day, but I don’t want to be a hero like him. My cousin, he’s so used to going it alone, he doesn’t know any other way. But I do. I see it now. You, Winn, my sister, Ms. Grant even, you’ve all showed me that. James, part of being your own man is knowing when to accept help.