ARE-TRYING-TO-KILL-EACH-OTHER

anonymous asked:

I don’t particularly trust what the writers or the producers say - they are the same people who thought it was normal to have Steve kiss Sharon only 48 hours after Peggy died,>> They justified why , Steve had been interested in her since TWS. It is not their fault as people refuse to see it. They confirm that Tony wanted to kill Bucky, I can not go against what the creators said just because I am deluded into thinking that Tony is a good guy.

‘kay!

look, frankly i dont care that tony tried to kill bucky - you wanna know why??? because it’s a superhero movie. they all try to kill each other at some fucking point. t’challa spent the entirety of the movie running around trying to kill bucky, wanda spent the majority of aou trying to kill the avengers, in bvs batman literally tries to kill superman….like, ,, ,, my dude it is Very Hard for me to be like upset about this when im so desensitised to it,,,,,

this genre literally does not at all care about the moral or psychological repercussions of trying to kill someone my dude! its just a stupid movie!! 

But what about vampire history teachers. Vampires who read something from a text book then proceed to light the book on fire and throw it out the window because “No. that’s not even close to what really happened. Listen up nerds I’m about to teach you what really happened in France during the revolution”

“… well, I admit that it didn’t exactly go as planned…”


His eye twitched. “Didn’t go as planned? Your ‘pet’ killed a girl!”


“I was not aware that…a certain student would go wandering into this part of the school at that time…”


“It’s a girl’s toilet, Tom. Who do you think was more out of place there?”


“…”


- Tomarry [ Time Travel AU]

anonymous asked:

Dude I thought of how hilarious if Philip and Theodosia jr got together but like Modern AU, so like Alexander and Burr are trying not to kill each other because they love their children too much (and like the dinner tables Eliza is holding onto Alexander and Theodosia Sr is holding onto Burr complimenting Eliza's cooking)

hamilton realizes the situation could be  m u c h  worse

also sorry for my horrible looking nails lmao

Ed and Oswald aren’t really going to try to kill each other. It’ll just be Ed pointing a gun while Oswald screams, “EDWARD. EDWARD. EDWARD. EDWARD.” and Ed screaming “THE RIDDLER.”

That and them doing petty things to each other.

*Lights go out at Oswald’s house* “What the fuck?”

Ed from somewhere in the house “GUESS WHO CUT THE POWER”

And, *Ed takes a sip of coffee then his phone rings*

“REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID YOU POISONED MY COFFEE. GUESS WHAT ASSHOLE?”

*Ed spits out the coffee and starts to panic*

“HA GOT YOU.”

How can people link Vampires™ to Twilight when Anne Rice literally created the vampire version of the kardashians before the kardashians even existed.
Like we have the ambiguous 17 yrs old lookin who’s in love with an alcholist with purple eyes, two gay drama queens in love (but that constantly try to kill each other) who adopt a little girl out of nowhere and other vague family members that we’re going to name The Straights™ who don’t really like the youngest and gayest of the gang. Also let’s not forget that everyone hates Drama Queen #1 Lestat but they all listen to his music and even buy his book.

Lance again

-this bitch knows so many languages, I’m not kidding, he knows Gaelic, and he will whisper sexual things in Shiro’s ears, Korean (yes Keith he heard your moonwax poetry about Hunk’s muscles and his caramel eyes), Japanese (Shiro often mumbles under his breath about Lance’s beauty), and so many more.

-he listens to any music from the 20s-to modern and any genre, he doesn’t care what era or what country as long as he likes it.

-as stated earlier he plays the ukulele, I’m adding the guitar (acoustic and electric), and the shamisen (I desperately want to learn how to play this grandiose instrument) and the classical instruments.

-his fav color is grey, or black. He also likes the rain. It makes him feel clean.

-he wears booty shorts and crop tops when he feels like it, which is often.

-Shiro is internally crying and trying not to jump Lance

-lance paints his nails azure and he made his nail Polish himself, fuck space malls and their outdated fashion.

-who the fuck wears parachute pants anyway??

-Lance watches The Addams Family, The Munsters, ghost hunting shows and serial killer documentaries.

-when Haggar does that magic voodoo bullshit she gets the fuck out real fast and vows never again. bc fuck the blue paladin is fucking horrifying, why does he know how to cook and eat a human?? Why does he know eighty ways to kill a man in an empty room?? What the fuck??

-Lance has existential crises on the ship, Allura hears him talking outloud about the inevitably of death and the numbness of existing,, she is shook and has to sit for hours to recollect her will to live, she vows to solidify Lance’s place in the team and thier hearts

-Lotor freaks tf out,,, how is someone so damn beautiful hanging about his such riffraff,,, he tries to snatch lance away after lacing his drink,, Shiro shoots Lotor in the ass for even trying to steal his koi.

-When Lance goes swimming Hunk goes with him, lance doesn’t go alone after he decided to go surfing at night on veradero’s coast. He was taken down and nearly drowned

-lance has always wanted to be a waterbender, so when a druid hits blue with a quintessence blast ending with lance and blue melding their quintessence together he gains the ability to manipulate the states of water he fucks around with everyone, Keith’s pants suddenly get wet, Pidge’s water stays in the glass (even when she holds it upside down), Shiro’s shirts are always wet and they stick to him like a second skin. Ice covers Lance’s arms and he panics resulting in some queen elsa bulllshit

-if you piss Lance off be prepared for a fucking guilt trip,, he will wreck you and your bloodline.

-He will call Shiro out on his favoritism daily,,, bc you can’t favor two people out of a crew of seven, including yourself, self care Shiro. Self care.

-Lance can hold his liquor like the Irishmen of old. Challenging him to a drinking contest is asking for alcohol poisoning

-Lance is a romantic/angry drunk.
(“Shhhirrooo, dance wif meee”///“I will kick your ass, I’ll kick my own ass, I’ll kick the Sun’s ass”)

-Lance always wanted to be a surgeon, or a coroner. The human body has always interested him, this explains why he watches those documentaries

-Pidge snaps one day at Lance for no reason, lance don’t play that white people shit where the young ones rule the damn world, Pidge now understands La Chancla™ and the fear. She also gets a timeout and naptime.

-Lance will mother the shit out of anyone and anything.

-alien refugees? Boom! Mother lance at your service!

-he gives Lotor a strict talking too, it doesn’t work and lance is left with a bruise the size of a volleyball.

-Shiro nearly kills Lotor with his organic hand.

-Hunk and Lance cook and bake and talk about boys. Pidge is ace, Allura is asexual, and Coran is faithful to his deceased wife

-Hunk is also Lance’s sparring partner, neither of them ever hold back, one day Kieth walks in on them and thought they were trying to kill each other

-lance dislikes the quite, he fills it with his voice so he doesn’t go mad with depression and kill someone.

-he contemplates death so much. It’s worrying

-the mind meld thing? Yeah, everyone comes out mildy scared and mildly threatened.

-Shiro thinks its pretty hot when lance rambles about serial killers, Shiro supposes it kuro trying to break out.

-Lance loves having shaved legs and wearing cute dresses and skirts

-florals are his favorite pattern

-this boy is a leggy boi.

-he wears heels and slays the make-up game.

-Allura is jealous.

vld cast as monsters

WHY DO I DO THESE????!!!

  • So Keith’s a witch 
    • “Not a warlock, you dumbass, a witch. I don’t need entrails to actually do things, read a book for fucks sake.”
    • In case you didn’t notice, he gets all miffed about the comparison 
  • Allura’s a sorceress
    • The main difference is Keith basically needs a spell book (Lance calls it his cookbook, since he never really ‘casts’ things, just bakes potions) 
    • Allura doesn’t need a book, but she does have to say enchantments
  • Shiro’s a zombie
    • His family adopted Keith
    • Then a few years later he died
    • Keith went all witchy tying to get him back.
      • Obviously, Mr. and Mrs. Shirogane flipped but, eh, they got their son back so no biggie
    • TBH tho Shiro’s lost his arm so many time’s now that Keith’s given up on sewing a new one on him and just got him a prosthetic
  • Hunks a werewolf, comes from big family of them
  • Shay and her brother are were’s, too, but they were Turned, not born
    • Hunk’s family (nobles) don’t give a crap about all that
    • So they took Rax and Shay in when they could
  • Coran’s a seer
    • He’s prophetic and can actually tell what’s going on past all the illusions and glamour thrown around
    • Save for that, Coran’s normal
    • He met Alfor a little after Allura’s mom died and they kind of hit it off
      • He’s pretty much her second dad
  • Lance is mer
    • No, they don’t have tails 
      • they evolved from that eons ago, duh
      • They just control water and have gills, so they move the currents underwater to swim
    • His family lives by the beach near campus so everyone visits often
      • It’s funny cause Allura and Lance’s twin often try and see who can bewitch more people during parties
        • It’s crazy and Coran nearly dies every time
  • Matt’s a ghost
    • He didn’t die, he’s just in a coma, has been in one for a year or so now
    • He hangs out everyone since…
    • …Well…
    • …Let’s just say Keith done fucked up 
    • So now Matt’s tied to the college campus!
    • And he can’t leave whatsoever!
    • Great, huh?
      • “Keith, what the fuCK?!!!”
  • Speaking of college, everyone’s in the same fraternity … sorority … thing ..
    • Well, there’s no gender separation 
    • So it’s just everyone in the same building 
      • As they try not to kill each other and
        • Or blow up the entire campus
  • So one of the most annoying things they all have to deal with is Pidge
  • Kinda
    • So, Pidge is human and doesn’t know about the supernatural
      • Obviously
    • But because Pidge is mortal, they can’t find out about, well, everything
    • But they kinda did?
    • Oops
  • Anyways, it all started when Hunk and Lance brought Pidge home for a project
    • And Matt flipped his shit
      • “…Huh, now that you mention it, she does kind of look like you.”
    • So of course now everything is awkward
    • Hunk is all careful around Pidge, never really talking about his dorm and shit
    • Lance honestly didn’t change cause he’s an awesome liar 
      • Siblings + blackmail = a 100% guarantee he won’t spill the beans 
      • But Pidge will just suddenly look at him, all judgmental and stuff and he’s just like
      • Sweating bullets, like, what the fUCk Hunk how do you deal with this??
      • “I’m feeling something?? is this guilt??? why do I feel guilt?!?!?!”
    • Then there’s Allura and Shiro, who happen to be in a poly relationship with Matt as of second semester
    • One time Shiro almost spills the beans
      • “Honestly, your nothing like your broth - brochure! ….You’re nothing like your brochure?”
      • “…Thank you?”
      • *Allura screaming in the bg*
    • Eventually they all get over it and Pidge is allowed back in the dorm
      • Cause, ya know, they kicked them out for a bit
        • “This place is awesome! How do you apply?”
        • “………. Uh, I don’t really know, Hunk, uh … Lance?”
        • “Ya know, Hunk’d know more about it. He’s the one that got Shay and Rax in.”
        • “What?! I … RAX! Come explain?”
        • “…..fuck.”
    • And now Pidge just frequents the place
    • Sure, there’s weird things going on every other second
      • Like that one closet that Keith won’t let anyone into
      • Or when Shay and Rax get all crabby at random times of the month
      • Or like people including non existent entities in on conversations
      • Or perhaps those moments when random things start to move 
      • “… Why did that mug just … ??? … you know what? Fuck it. Hunk! Come here, I wanna blow shit up!”
    • Everyone manages to keep them in the dark for a whole six months
    • It’s a big project, just keeping Pidge from figuring things out
      • The main problem is because they’re fucking smart and don’t believe in coincidences
        • “No, Pidge, that glass didn’t move. Are you feeling okay?”
        • “No, Pidge, you didn’t just see Allura jump from the second story down without breaking a leg.”
        • “No, Pidge, Keith just really likes his book. Okay. He really likes his book.”
          • “…Is it some kinda kink?”
          • “…Sure. Yeah, let’s go with that.”
            • “Lance, why the fuck does Pidge think I have a fucking book kink?!!”
    • Allura casts a few masking spells and Keith manages to brew a few sealing potions for certain … areas of the dorm
      • But Pidge is sneaky
      • Not to mention immune to Wolfsbane
        • “What the literal fUCK?”
        • “Come on, it can’t be that bad.”
          • Te-he, it’s that bad
            • “Wolfsbane is the basis of all things, the foundation, the - the - the … the flour in cookies!! You can’t just leave the flour out of cookies!!”
            • “…You can still make cookies without flour.”
            • “But they’ll be fucking terrible cookies!”
    • Lance smooth talks them out of a few things, too
    • Turns up the charm and Mer’s his way outta things
      • At least, he tries to
      • But Pidge is ace
      • They don’t feel sexual attraction
        • “I can’t do anything! My voice doesn’t work, my charms don’t work, hell, I could flash them and they wouldn’t react.”
        • “Oh trust me, they’d react.”
    • And now Shay and Rax have to come up with stories about all their pills
    • Hunk, the lovable jerk, doesn’t need pills
      • But he does need to explain how he can grow a full on beard in two days
        • “…Blame my mom?”
    • Coran stops doing his freaky glowing eyes thing 
      • Well, he tries
      • He has a few … episodes when Pidge is around and boy
      • Those were fun to cover up
      • Turns out Pidge now thinks Coran’s big into theater and bright blue contacts
    • Even Shiro takes a few precautions
      • He re-sews his stitches nightly so they don’t fly off in the middle of Taco Tuesday
      • He drinks those disgusting potions Keith makes
        • “They keep your body healthy!”
        • “They taste like butt, Keith, like butt.”
      • He spritiz himself in perfume after Pidge notes that he “kinda smells like the earth
        • “Pfft! Smells like the earth? Yeah, that’s eau de coffin.”
        • “Matt, shut up.”
  • In the end, it’s actually Keith who finally spills their secret
    • You see … he and Lance were kind of making out
    • And Mer’s kinda … sorta … glow when they release endorphins
    • So Pidge walks into the living room unannounced and there’s Lance just
    • Sitting there
    • Glowing like a fucking angler fish
  • Covers blown just like that
  • They actually take it really well
    • “… So Lance is a mermaid?”
    • “Kinda.”
    • “And Allura’s a sorceress who’s over ten thousand years old?”
    • “Sort of.”
    • “And Shiro’s dead?”
    • “Oh definitely.”
    • “…Okay.”
  • So, yeah, Pidge now knows what’s going on around the house
  • And after a few quick spells, courtesy of Allura, they can see all the ~magic~ (rainbow, shiny, sparkly) they couldn’t before
    • That also means they can now see the fact that Keith has freaky ass veins after he brews a few potions
    • He can also see Lance’s gills
    • Oh, and the fact that Allura’s hair is fucking silver
      • “Holy shIT! ow the hell did I miss this?!!!”
        • “Uh, hello, Pidge, it’s me, Matt, you haven’t seen me in a year.”
  • But, of course, since Pidge knows now….
    • Hehehe
    • Oh boy
    • Buckle up, everyone
  • First come the questions
  • Everyone, and I mean everyone, had an hour long interrogation interview on how the hell they got away with all this shit
    • It involves lots of secrets, the occasional assassination, and  ~magic~ (rainbow, shiny, sparkly)
  • After that, Pidge pulled Shiro aside and had him explain how the fuck he’s alive
      • “So Keith … dug you up and force fed you a radioactive cockroach?”
  • Then comes Lance’s weird ass explanation of his powers
    • “Let’s see, I can make myself seem beautiful, though I already am~~~, I can breathe underwater, I can force involuntary drownings-”
    • “WHAT?!”
    • “-I can pitch my voice up to a C9, which is awesome cause it’s not even on the keyboard, and …. oh! And I can make people fall in love with me! That one’s fun.”
      • Which then, of course, leads to the awkward explanation of how he and Keith got together
        • “So, let me get this straight, you had a crush on him and he had a crush on you.”
        • “Yup.”
        • “But neither of you knew so Keith gave you a love potion, which then spurred you into pulling your charms and forcing him to fall in love with you.”
        • “Uh-huh.”
        • “And then he thought you didn’t like him so he voodoo’d you both?”
        • “Yup.”
        • “And now you’re technically soulmates with bound hearts?”
        • “Yeah … is that weird?”
        • “No, no, it’s perfectly normal - of course it’s weird, good god what the literal fuCK Keith?!”
  • They question Hunk next
    • The most they manage to get out of him as to how he does what he does it magic (~rainbow, shiny, sparkly~)
    • Shay and Rax don’t fair well, either
      • “I think I’d be more concerned about turning into an over glorified Chihuahua rather than exactly how it happens.”
      • “Speak for yourself. I always thought of myself as a Shih Tzu.”
  • Pidge tried with Allura but she dove right into runes and spells and they just zoned her out after fifteen minutes
  • Keith didn’t fair well either
    • “Why are you purple again?”
    • “…It’s an after effect.”
  • All in all:
    • Everyone is crazy
    • Allura and Lance blow up half of campus trying to make magical lush products
      • “Too much bomb, not enough bath.”
      • “Shut UP, Lance.”
    • Keith raised the dead
    • Again
    • Hunk accidentally runs around campus as both a wolf and a very, very naked man in the same night
      • Pidge was chasing after him with a net
    • Shay and Rax convince everyone to play spin the bottle and it ends with Keith and Lance actively making out in the corner while Shiro strips
    • Matt has managed to accidentally get kids ‘expelled’ ten different times due to his inadvertent need to poltergeist
    • Coran sees the future twice in one day and each time it included chicken nuggets, a thong, and one of Shiro’s detached limbs
    • They nearly destroy the world five times and save it once
    • That involved ketchup, a fourth wall break, and a klance fanfic written by Shay and Pidge

No but if Nico di Angelo, Sadie Kane and Alex Fierro would meet up, they’d immediately start trying to kill each other in the most brutal ways while destroying the whole place, and Will, Walt and Magnus would just sit there, eat cheese crackers and watch them like proud moms.