Okay so yesterday I felt like I was getting in a little deep with the Control Freak..she does that to me. She really makes me second guess myself sometimes and I wanted to stop for the day. But here we go to continue family as I know it.
Mr Gruff just appears to be that way to most. I know him as someone who has worked hard to provide his family with what the needed. Not necessarily everything we wanted but we never went without that’s for sure. He came into my life when I was bout 8 or 9 but he has always been dad to me. He may not have always super affectionate but I knew he loved me and still does. Mr Gruff is now sober and has been for a few years; there were many when he wasn’t. Wow that was hell to watch but it also taught me a lot about what type of person I wanted to be or not be as the case may be. The relationship between him and Control Freak also showed me what I wanted for myself when I got older; I didn’t want to have a huge amount of drama, volatility, and buyers remorse. One thing I noticed as I got older is that their relationship was definitely one that lacked communication and maybe some resentment. For example - When Mr Gruff was a drinker Control Freak was a gambler. So when Mr Gruff drank Control Freak gambled or vice versa. There were times that foreclosure was facing them, overdrawn bank accounts, or even the threat of repossessions. It was a vicious cycle that I watched continually…sad really. But now that he is sober and Control Freak doesn’t appear to be gambling so much they have managed to have a somewhat normal retirement and they moved a state away. So much for micro-managing my life right? I could only hope….lol
For those of us who all have siblings I am sure that one is always considered the Golden One…yeah I definitely have one of those (cue rolling of the eyes). This is the one that was the cheerleader, popular, cute, and could do no wrong..cough cough bullshit cough cough. Oh did I say that…sorry back on track now. Parental units bought the first car for her and oh did she think she was cool cruising around in her camaro (oh it was used but still very nice). Now mind you I was very close to this one as well and she looked up to me for some reason…there are quite a few years between us. Frankenstein, Ronin, Golden One, and I even shared a house together. She worked and went to school; didn’t have to pay rent or anything as long as she was in school. Cool deal right?? Wish I had that at 17. Anywhoo…let’s fast forward to the present and why yes she is still the Golden One. She has some issues along the way that I feel were enabled by most or just swept under the rug with everything else yet again. We are talking pill addiction, meth addiction, attempted suicide (twice), and rehab. Now don’t think I am being cynical or uncaring, this is my sister ya know. This is just me standing on the outside looking in and seeing what I see. But when she was down and out the parental units took her in (as any good parent should help their child) but the enabling became painfully obvious. She didn’t have a job, they bought her a car (which she later scrapped when she took off again), and she didn’t have to do basically anything except exist. She has always needed to be center stage and that’s just how it goes. She went to school for certified medical assistant; for years this all she knew. No other schooling or skills so to speak of. She now works where I work (thankfully in a different department) but she lied to get her job and has not proven she can do it after 4 years. This irritates the crap out of me because I have been here 11 years and worked my ass off from the bottom to get where I am today…oh yeah did I mention I got my Master’s degree for what I do? Accounting is definitely not in her vocabulary and it shows. She has definitely found the way to manipulate the system in a lot of aspects. Man I wish sometimes there were days I could just say to hell with everything and do what I want. But then you would see me picking everything up putting it back in order and continuing on because I am the responsible one dammit. Oh and she has one child and is currently single. Got married young (not to the child’s father), got divorced, went on a blind date (come to find out it was someone we knew from our Cali days…weird I know), got pregnant, had a volatile relationship with baby daddy (this was all before her damaging days of drugs and running..that came later). NEXT!
The Impulsive Prude…oh this is going to be good. Hang on! So this is my youngest sibling who I am still close with today. There was definitely a time when I wasn’t because I didn’t agree with her decisions (most of which were made for her I believe and as a young girl she didn’t know how to change them). She was always the quiet one, did her chores, and went to school. Didn’t have too many friends and would babysit for money. Our cousin had three kids that she would go babysit for regularly…until we discovered there was more than just babysitting going on. Frankenstein and I lived 2 houses down from him and were always curious when we were told that Impulsive Prude was babysitting but his vehicle never left the driveway. Yes this was brought to the attention of the parental units because seriously how could they let this activity happen. Well…we didn’t know what we were talking about and absolutely nothing like that would be going on between them. Oh really? Okay so when we moved back to Cali and the Golden One and her came for a visit and she brought some of his clothes with her and called him all the time that wasn’t weird?? Oh now mind you…said cousin is about 18 years older than her. When we would ask her about what’s going on she would get REALLY defensive and tell us that we didn’t know anything about her life. Shut us out really. But I can say we tried, maybe not hard enough but we tried. Obviously not hard enough because they ended up getting married…in Vegas because they couldn’t legally where we are..and had 4 kids. We won’t even go in to the times she left him, moved in with us and our kids, went back to him, stayed with us again, went back to him and the times there was a revolving door on her own house with him moving in and out. Now I call her the Impulsive Prude because she shops impulsively and thinks any type of sexually conversation is just gross….ummm excuse me but you have 4 kids; you know how this works…lol. One of the times she left him she had a large enough vehicle for everyone in their house (yes his 3 kids lived with them) she decided that she wasn’t going back and just went to the dealership one day and traded it in for a smaller vehicle for her and her two kids at the time. Or the time she actually just went and bought the bigger vehicle all on her own without telling him. Hmm…I always discuss large purchases with my partner..especially and $60,000 vehicle that comes with a hefty payment. So Impulsive Prude it is. Fast forward to today…she still works in the medical field (she went to school with the Golden One for certified medical assistant as well), is divorced, has her 4 kids and works her ass off to make ends meet. I love her dearly but she needs to think seriously about some other issues and how to make ends meet with his help…doing it without it is killing her. I do as much as I can to help her when I can but I still have kids at home too.
Peter Griffin will be my last entry to this post and the next post will be all about Frankenstein’s family. So Peter Griffin is the son of Mr Gruff..I first met him when he was 2 and lived with his mother. The memories of Peter Griffin are scarce because I never really grew up with him, just the occasional visits when he was young and then at some point he lived with the parental units and I saw him when I came home for visits. I am closer to him now as an adult then I ever was growing up. Now I call him Peter Griffin because that’s what he dressed up as for one of our epic Halloween parties and it just stuck…lol. So as a person I love my brother I really don’t have any issues with him and we hang out pretty often. He has a good girlfriend whose son was actually friends with Ronin I think about the same time they got together. Weird…but we do live in a somewhat small town. Peter Griffin works for the same place I do…in a different department..and has been there awhile. When Peter decided to move back to this area he called up the parental units to see if he could stay with them until he started his job and could get on his feet. He had been through a divorce and was trying to figure out his life. So they said sure come on down and we’ll help out as much as we can. So Peter moved in and started his job, kept pretty much to himself, and came across the street to hang out with us when he was off. Peter Griffin likes to hang out and have a good time; this usually included alcohol. Not that we cared let’s do it up when we don’t have anything else going on. Well this irked the Control Freak as you can imagine. So what did the parental units do? Started charging him rent…$500 a month? What??? How did they expect him to get a place of his own and save up for it if they were going to charge him that? I just shake my head because I don’t get the reasoning. Not to mention he worked nights while they were home and slept during the day when they were at work. He did his own laundry, made his own food, had remarks made when he didn’t eat the leftovers because Control Freak had made enough for him too but then got yelled at because he ate the leftovers. What in the actual hell is going on here?? Oh and just for the record Peter Griffin is older than the Golden One and Impulsive Prude. Finally he got his own place and started doing his own thing but our relationship has always been good. We are the black sheep of the family ya know.
Whew…that was an overload of family drama!! Happy trails…and I will see you soon!