99 to one

You’re a post apocalyptic private investigator, 70 years after a virus wiped out 99.99% of humanity.

One day, you’re hired by an old woman. She tells you her case is a bit stranger than most, but the pay is good. “Find who killed the world!” she tells you before she herself dies.

At first you think she’s delusional, but as you go through the things she left to you before she died, you find a deeper mystery afoot.

Somebody caused the apocalypse on purpose. And it’s your job to find out who.

anonymous asked:

(occasional-wott-bros) Pixel sniffs you curiously before sitting before you and saying "Snoot!" excitedly. What are you going to teach him?

99% sure no one else can teach hitting sticks like I can. These ones are also good for chewing on if that’s you style too.

@occasional-wott-bros

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When Brooklyn Nine-Nine Does The Thing™ (aka the best 7 minutes of your day)

The Director: Merle, please keep an eye on Angus today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get himself punched.
Merle: Sure, I’d love to see Angus get punched.
The Director: Try again.
Merle: I will stop Angus from getting punched.
The Director: Correct.