As a songwriter, if you write a song that helps somebody get past losing someone that they trusted, and loved, and let into their life.. if your music helps somebody with that, when they’re heartbroken, when they need music more than any other time in their life.. it’s the nicest compliment that you could ever give me, so if that ever happened to you, thank you for letting my music into your life.
One of the things that’s so devastating about having your heart broken is not the initial pain.. it’s the aftershocks of it, and trying to move on, and trying to replace all the habits that you had with this person you had in your life.. with new ones. And something like that can only happen over time. But I think the most devastating thing that happens when you have your heart broken, or when you lose somebody that you loved, or you lose a friend, even.. is that you start to regret letting people in.. you start regretting trusting people.. and you think, “God, I’m so stupid”, “I’m so foolish”, “Why would I let that person in my life?”, “Why did I trust them?”. But I wanna let you know something right now.. letting people in, and trusting people, and being vulnerable enough to do those things is NEVER stupid, it’s brave. So I don’t want you to ever regret that.
And so, once this happens, you feel humiliated, and you feel embarrassed that you maybe chose the wrong person to trust.. and they betrayed you, or they deserted you, or.. it just didn’t work out for one reason or another.. and so, you go about your life and over time, very slowly, you start to replace the habits, like getting a text message in the morning from them.. waking up and expecting that, or a goodnight phone call, or little surprises. You start to replace spending time with that person, with spending time with your friends. And then maybe decision by decision, day by day, maybe you start living your life more on your terms, and not on anyone else’s. And then one day, maybe months later, maybe years later, but there is that day, when you look in the mirror and you don’t feel like heartbreak is written all over your face anymore. And all of a sudden, that day happens, and you feel.. clean.
Taylor Swift, “Clean” speech - 9/17/15 (Columbus, OH)