9.19.11

Visited the Glee set today...

i feel like it was barely real life though. i still need time to process most of it and will have a decent write up for you tomorrow or maybe Wed (since tomorrow will probably be too glee filled)

the best moment for sure was meeting Chris Colfer, especially after we almost got killed for it (seriously it was like a real-life Sunshine story up in here, filled with crack dens and horribleness.) he was incredibly sweet, shook hands with all of us and stood to chat for a moment even though they were calling him back for make-up. he said hello to my friend on the phone and listened to me thank him a hundred times for bringing me and my friends together.

he also commented on my pink sunglasses earrings and said “Did you make those? Darren would freak!”

he kindly took a picture with us but asked us to not put it on the internet and even though other pictures of him and his outfit have linked, i am staying true to my word to him and not posting it until AFTER the episode airs. if you are good followers then you won’t mind seeing it a little late, and honestly, i will still probably be flailing about it in a few weeks time. i know it’s probably unnecessary but i promised Chris, and my loyalty to him is something i hold dearly so it’s under-wraps until then. thank you for understanding.

i love you all. i only got three hours of sleep and spent like 14 hours outside in the sun, not to mention the emotional roller coaster of a day it’s been so I am going to sleep!! GOOD NIGHT!

9.19.11 - I'm Running Out Of Stupid Names For My Stupid Poems.

Lately,
I smoke cigarettes less out of habit
and more out of a desire to remember you.
I spend more time around bonfires.
Rub my body against the pines and cedars.
I bathe in this salt water Summer
and stain my fingers black
with berries.
My lips burn with smiles
before sleep and when waking.
My heart is heavy,
full of words
and repeating.
The last full moon that I saw you
told me I could catch you on the next one.
So for now,
I’ll leave this up to atoms, impossibility and infinite things.

There is very little that does not remind me of you.

I was half in love with her by the time we sat down. That’s the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they’re not much to look at, or even if they’re sort of stupid, you fall half in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can.
—  The Catcher in the Rye
Holden Caulfield in Chapter 10
9.19.11 - Letters

We’ve been writing you letters.
Keeping them tucked under typewriters,
inside old records
and crumpled up in all the old cigarette boxes.
They all use a lot of words,
like “missing,” “loving,” “hoping,”
and “you.”
It’s all a bit madness, you know.
I don’t know who you are
and you may never meet me.
I just thought it was important to tell you these things.

9.19.11 - Indian Summer Jeans/Dreams

There are two hundred and forty three stitches in these jeans.
In them,
I’ve probably jumped in 2 separate oceans, nine lakes, twelve rivers and
had two wet dreams.
Sometimes these things can’t be helped. 
Holes come and go.
Roads come;
they grow longer.
I’m not sure yet, 
if they ever end.
I danced under the full moon in these jeans.
Dreamt of kissing your mouth,
unbuttoning both buttons and
dropping them to my knees.
I tied them around my neck,
in the desert,
stood warm & wet
 in my underwear.
I saw a mirage
or maybe it was G-d.
Maybe it was you.

These days, I’m never quite sure of the difference.