7:50 pace

Just friends, right? END

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Warnings: mild language

Word count: 1760 (oops it got longer than expected)

Summary: Bucky and the reader are madly in love but they both are unaware of the other’s feelings

A/N: Yay, My first completed series! I hope you guys liked it! Feedback, as always, is greatly appreciated.

Part1       Part2       Part3

Originally posted by bagelbarnes

It was 7:50 pm as you paced anxiously around the gym waiting for Bucky to enter. Every slight noise put you on edge expecting him to burst through the door. You had been reciting what you wanted to say to him for the past hour and every minute that passed by made your nervousness grow.

You really didn’t have anything to be worried about. You already knew that Bucky loved you, it was just that sharing all your feelings with Bucky was nerve wracking. There was no telling how he would react. Would he try to take back what he said to you in the gardens when you brought it up?

“So Buck, are you going spar with me for real this time? Last time I beat you so bad, I swear you were letting me win” You heard Steve joke with Bucky as they approached the gym door. You froze in your spot unable to move, when all you wanted was to hide. Your nerves were getting the best of you, but you took a few deep breaths and regained your composure. Straightening your shoulders, you turned to the door and waited for Bucky and Steve to enter.

Their voices became clearer as Steve opened the door and allowed Bucky to go into the room before him. Immediately after Bucky’s feet crossed the threshold of the gym, Steve slammed the door closed behind him.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, lock all the gym doors and do not open them until I give you the go ahead. Mr. Barnes has something he needs to take care of in there” you heard Steve yell from outside the door.

“Of course Mr. Rogers” the automated voice replied and the click of the doors locking echoed throughout the space.

Bucky hadn’t noticed that you were in the room as he was too busy pounding on the doors, trying to get himself out.

“Steve what the hell! Let me out you dick” Bucky yelled, clearly exasperated with Steve’s antics. You were also a little shocked with Steve’s “plan”. This is not what you had expected but if it’s the only way to get Bucky to hear you out, then so be it.

Bucky’s hands were buried in his hair as he turned himself around, obviously not getting anywhere by yelling at Steve. That’s when he spotted you. His eyes widened and he immediately began yelling at Steve again.

“Steve I to swear to god, I’m going to beat your ass when I get out of here” Bucky shouted and slammed his fist against the door again.

“Bucky, we-” you started but he cut you off.

“No, no I can’t do this Y/N” he cried. Hearing him say your name for the first time in a very long time sent shivers down your spine.

“What do you mean you can’t do this? What can’t you do?” you asked and stepped closer to him.

“I just can’t” he said and gripped his hair harder and slid down to the wall and onto the floor.

“Bucky, I-”

“No, I don’t want you to say it…I know it was stupid of me to say. The last thing I ever wanted was to make you uncomfortable. I really ruined everything, didn’t I? You have to know how sorry I am for saying it but I just couldn’t help myself. I know you deserve better than me and I know what you are about to say. I can’t bare to hear it, so please don’t” His words came out rushed and he seemed to be choking on the air around him. His gaze dropped to the floor and you took a deep breath.

“Buck, look at me” you stated firmly.

“Please Y/N, don’t” he begged you but slowly lifted his eyes to meet yours. You stood above him and looked him directly in his eyes.

“Did you mean it? What you said at the gardens?” You asked nervously, picking at your nails. The silence was tense and after a few moments he opened his mouth to speak.

Every word” He whispered. A warm sensation radiated from your chest and spread down your arms and legs. You smiled and he stood up from where he was sitting on the floor. He was no longer looking at you. He just paced back and forth across the padded floor. His hand were in his hair yet again and he seemed to be getting more flustered by the second. Amidst his pacing his eyes met yours and he stepped forward to speak to you.

“Okay listen. I’ve felt… that way about you for a long time now. At first I thought it was just a little thing that I would get over. But then every time I saw you around, I couldn’t stop staring. I found myself thinking about you all the time. And then I started talking about you when you weren’t around. I’d miss you whenever you left a room. I would wonder how you would wear your hair everyday and I’d practice how I would greet you at breakfast in my bathroom mirror. Your presence made me feel at ease, like I was a human being again. You would help me through my nightmares and play with my hair. You stayed up late with me to watch movies when I couldn’t fall asleep and whenever I came back from a mission you were the only person I wanted to see. You made me breakfast and exposed me to the new world. You trusted me with everything that you had and that is something that I had never experienced. I mean, how could I not love you for god’s sake. You are so intoxicating and insanely intelligent. You were so compassionate and you treated me like a normal person when I felt like I was a monster. We were best friends, but I always wanted more with you. I should’ve been satisfied with being friends with you and I’ve waited for years for my feeling to subside but they’ve only grown. I invited other girls around to distract myself, but on every date I would keep daydreaming that you were the one with me instead. When we went to the gardens I thought that if I could tell you, even if you were asleep, then maybe I could ease my mind. Obviously that was a shit idea. Now I’ve ruined everything and I’m sure you won’t want to be around me anymore. I’ve missed you so much and these past weeks have killed me. I understand that you don’t feel the same-” His words had you nearly in tears. He had just said everything that you had every wanted him to say to you but he just wouldn’t shut his beautiful to allow you to speak. You interrupted him and began to talk.

“Bucky-” he cut you off again.  

“Y/N please just let me finish, I know that you deserve better and-”

“Bucky please-”

“It’s okay if you don’t want to be friends-”

“Bucky goddammit shut up and listen to me!” You yelled at him. His eyes snapped to you, wide, and his cheeks were bright pink. His line of sight dropped back to the floor while he tried to catch his breath from his speech.

“I need you to look at me so I know that you are listening, please” You whispered. He lifted his eyes to meet yours and they held a distressed look that he only expressed after a particularly bad nightmare. You stepped forward and took his metal hand in yours. His body froze as he stared at you.

“Bucky, I love you”

“You-you what?” his eyes opened even wider than they were before if that was even possible. You reached out and brushed his hair out of his face from his wild rant.

“I love you.”

He gaze left your eyes and he gripped your hand tightly.

“I’m dreaming. This isn’t real” he murmured. He lightly shook his head back and forth.

“I can promise that you are not dreaming. I’m real, and I love you very much Mr. Barnes” you smirked and chuckled at his reaction.

“Again” he whispered.

“Huh?”

“Say it again” he pleaded with you and his eyes met yours once again.

“I love you” you stated and kissed his jaw.

“Again” he asked and a smile began to spread over his perfect face.
“I love you” you kissed the tip of his nose.

“Hmm again.”

“I love you” you kissed his cheek. His hands settled on your hips quirking his eyebrows to ask if it was okay with you. You smiled at him and rested your head on his chest. You were too lost in eachother to hear the click of the gym doors as they unlocked. Steve peeked his head inside and saw smiles on both of your faces. His work was done.

Bucky’s large hands held your face as he tipped your head up to kiss him. He weaved his fingers through your hair and you wrapped your arms around his neck. You both grinned into the kiss and at some point had to pull away because you were both too giddily happy. Bucky’s metal thumb rubbed the small of your back under you shirt and he leaned down to kiss your neck. You groaned and pulled him closer to you.

“Um guys, this is great and all but maybe you should go to one of your rooms before you have sex all over the gym floor” Steve smirked as the both of you whipped your heads around to the source of the noise. He laughed at his own joke and you smiled. Bucky’s hand gripped yours as he pulled you towards the door.

“Yeah whatever punk” Bucky said and shoved his shoulder into Steve with a smile.

“Oh wait there’s one more thing” Bucky stated and stopped you right in front of Steve.

“Y/N I love you, how’s about you let me take you dancing?” your smile grew and a massive grin overtook his face. “There Steve, how was that? ‘Tell her that you love her when you know she’s listening, and take her dancing’” he quoted Steve’s words from earlier that day.

“I’m gonna say that you did pretty good” You piped up from next to Bucky and squeezed his hand. He smiled at you.

“Alright so dancing? Where are we going?” you asked and Bucky led you past Steve.

“Where ever you want, love” he stated simply and kissed you forehead.


Tags

@heytherepartner  @drinkfantasy

3

~ HEY GUYS ~

HAPPY SUNDAY AND HAPPY FIRST DAY BACK TO RUNNING FOR MEEEEE AHHHH :) :) :)

My training started today…5.3 miles in 44 minutes for the first run in 3.5 weeks, not too shabby. I felt like a whole new person with my new watch.

I didn’t track each mile time, but I’m pretty sure my first three miles were all about 7:50-7:55 pace. I struggled the last 2.5 miles, but I have to remember I haven’t ran in a long time and I shouldn’t be at top performance right now.

Picked up some vanilla soy milk and some Lara bars for today, and had a post-run breakfast of natural PB, Medjool dates, and vanilla soy milk. I am excited to see how eating plant-based affects my running.

Love you all and have an incredible day! xx

In the haze of cumulative fatigue last night, my wife convinced me I’d be better off sleeping the extra hour this morning and running after work. Which sounded like a great idea until I actually got home and had no motivation to run.

I changed and monitored my son’s bike riding for about 45 minutes before loading up and taking off for 7 miles. And it wasn’t a fluke. My legs were legitimately dead. Positive splits that I won’t post but averaged out around 7:50 pace. Not bad really, but the perception was worse.

Now I shove some carbs in my body so I can run 10 more tomorrow morning with CES and a faster 16 on Sunday on my own. *gulp*

Chicago Marathon, Hansons Plan: Week 15/18, Mid-Week Check In

With bonus good hair day! 

Obviously, the big news of the weekend was that I did my first triathlon! Thanks for all the support guys. If I hadn’t been falling asleep on the couch at 3pm, I would have replied to you all much better. It was really fun and I hope to write up a race recap as soon as the pictures are posted to marathonfoto possible.

Other than that, this week has gone swimmingly re: running! Thank you for the cooler temps, fall! All of a sudden I’ve gone from a hot sweaty panting mess to a graceful gazelle. Sort of. 

Monday was supposed to be 3 x 2 miles at 7:50 pace with ½ mile recovery periods (total milesage 9) but I planned on  running 9 easy miles instead since it was the day after the tri. As always, plans went awry. First, I totally overslept and realized I only had time for 6 miles. BUT THEN, it was SO nice outside and I was feeling SO good that I ended up doing 2 x 2.5 miles at 7:50pace because…why not? I was going to stop as soon as my body started pushing back but it never did!

So yeah, not exactly what was planned but I’m going to go with a firm “nailed it” anyways.

Then yesterday was a true rest day. It was amazing. I totally agree with you ariavie, I don’t understand how some people don’t take them! 

Today was another sort of weird run day. It’s tempo run day and I had to do 10 miles at marathon pace plus of course the warm up and cool down miles. Gulp. On any morning, this is daunting but I had the added challenge of having to go into the office today. So I was up before 6am to drive to work and run around Gaithersburg. It actually went a LOT better than I was expecting. 

Splits were:

1 (warm up) 9:00

2- 7:54

3- 7:50

4 - 7:52

5 - 7:52

6 - 7:54

7 - 7:53

8- 7:52

9 - 7:54

10 - 7:56

11 - 7:54

12 (only .75 and the cooldown) - 6:50

I did something new for this run as well and for the first time in years, ran with music (other than the rare times I run on a treadmill). I think it really helped actually because it prevented the run from becoming monotonous and my legs wanted to follow the beat.

Overall, I’m tired still but feeling like I’m in a much better place. This weekend I run my second and last 16 miler before starting the taper. Eek!

Graphic T-Shirt Friday

Current mood. I’m wearing my big headphones in an effort to have people not talk to me at the office. Management is overrated. This is also why I hated group assignments in school. I prefer to be responsible for my work and my work alone. Also probably why I am a solo runner, not like an awesome team sports person. I’m also feeling tired and cranky today which is not helping my work team spirit. 

I am so tired of marathon training. I’m not just tired OF it, I’m obviously tired FROM it. I was walking up to meet a friend for dinner the other night and felt absurdly lightheaded just because it was an uphill walk. 

This past weekend was my last LONG long run: I ended up running 17.8 miles in 162 minutes.

Looking at it now, I realize why I was so tired since I ran the first, oh ELEVEN MILES way too fast. I guess I didn’t pay that much attention during the run.  

Three hours after completing that, I went to a wedding. I ended up totally leaving right at 10pm when people moved on to the after party because I was so tired just from that run. Plus, I had to be up early to run again on Sunday morning, even if it was just an easy recovery run.

Hansons doesn’t have a very long taper period so despite running my last long run, there are two more weeks of speed and strength workouts to do. Monday was 4 x 1.5 miles @ 4:40ish pace with quarter-mile recoveries:

I was surprised by how well this went considering the long run on Saturday and all the rest of it. 

Rest day on Tuesday! I went to Barre class that evening and my poor legs just hate me but the stretching and movement felt good (it’s not like a fancy barre class. It’s a ballet barre class so it’s not too stressful).

Wednesday, the ten mile tempo run. God, these are hard. Really, nothing like a tempo run at marathon pace to make you feel like you are going to fail miserably at running the actual marathon. 

I tried really hard to keep it right between 7:50-8:00 mile pace so I could avoid the numb quad problem I’ve been encountering at the end of my tempo runs but no such luck. 

But here it is: one more week of hard runs ahead of me, one week of taper and then MARATHON! Usually at this point I can’t wait to have a margarita or whatever after the race but right now, I’m most looking forward to waking up and not feeling like I have to hit a certain time or mileage on my runs. That sounds lovely to me. 

Chicago Marathon, Hansons Plan: Week 14/18, Mid-Week Check In

Firstly: I’m sorry I was totally MIA last week. Work has never been quite as crazy as it was. September 1 hit and all of a sudden the phone wouldn’t stop ringing. I stayed late all week except Friday and that’s only because I refused to work past 5 on a holiday weekend. So, sorry kids. I just had no brain capacity to tumbl.

Blarghy blargh blargh. I hate everything. I mean, that’s obviously a lie because at least I am running right now. But the quality of said running has been…lacking to say the least.

A recap: Three weeks ago I took off about a week from running, including my first 16 miler. Then I ran a sort of easy week, going for quantity as opposed to quality–aka miles but no speed. I spent all of last week feeling really really SORE, especially my quads. Which was annoying in and of itself.

So this past weekend was my first 16 miler of the Hansons plan. You know, the longest run I’ll do. The one where I feel like I shouldn’t be hating everything. Spoiler alert: hated everything and questioned my entire reasoning for running marathons.

I mean, it was FINE. Except for the last half which felt like everything was falling apart. This is nothing new though: my long run route takes me downhill into Rosslyn, along the Potomac river and then the return trends uphill. It’s a pain in the ass, literally. I spent a significant time after this run in bed because I felt awful.

Monday I was feeling hopeful about the speed/strength workout: 2x3 miles at 7:50 pace with a 1 mile recovery between the two 3 milers. It looked totally doable on paper. However, I decided to sleep in on Monday and by the time I got going we were closing in on 80 degrees and humid with the sun beating down on me.

I nailed the first 3 mile interval (split 2) but I spent all my energy on it. After my one mile recovery I had nothing left in the tank. As I said, I ended up walking portions of it (which is why the split times and distances are super wonky because I kept hitting lap to try to get going again). If I thought my long run sent me into a crisis, it had NOTHING on the self doubt that flooded my brain after this run. I also spent a lot of time lying on the couch afterwards, again.

Tuesday was my rest day but I swam some easy laps at the pool. I feel like I needed it, it’s so soothing.

Today, Wednesday, is tempo run day: 9 miles with an extra mile for the  warm up and cool down. Tempo runs for Hansons, remember, are actually marathon pace runs. Another reason why I feel like these shouldn’t suck quite as hard as they do for me.

So…I walked that one unhighlighted portion. I KNOW. I just couldn’t anymore. I needed a break. And then afterwards I just focused on “doing my best” instead of necessarily hitting 8 minute miles.

Okay, real talk: it shouldn’t be this hard, right? I mean, I’m doing easy miles most of the time which is why I should be able to hit the tempo and speed runs. How am I supposed to run 26.2 miles at this pace when just NINE is killing me? And let’s not even talk about the doubt about this whole 16 mile long run thing. That’s a good ten miles short of a marathon. HOW, Hansons.

I’m grumpy with running right now. I am trying to tell myself that this is totally normal self doubt creeping in with a month to go. Right? Right.