Warnings: Abandonment, Depression, Anxiety, Panic Attack, Swearing, Mentions of Character Death
Word Count: 5100ish
Summary: After the sudden and unexpected push into a new and unknown life, the reader finally crumbles under the weight of it all.
A/N: Spoilers: The reader’s panic attack is based off my own experiences with panic attacks. I know we all experience them differently, but this is how mine usually go down and how someone helps coax me out of them. Hope you all like this chapter! Feedback is much appreciated!
“Home sweet home, I guess,” Dean said as he shut the front door behind the three of you. He looked around the living room and then down at you with an awkward smile. You didn’t return it.
“I’m going to make dinner,” You responded simply.
You handed Jenny over to him and she let out an excited squeal, “Unca Bean!”
Just for a second, Dean saw your stone-face shatter at her words. But just as quickly as your expression broke, you had already picked up the pieces and hardened it, turning towards the kitchen to make supper.
It had taken you longer than usual to prepare dinner. Dean could see you struggling with the knobs and buttons on the unfamiliar stove and could make out the curses you hissed throughout your trial and error. Dean had offered to help only to have you ignore him, leaving him to occupy his time with entertaining Jenny.
gif creds to @gyuhan-17I tried to do it the usual way but it didn’t work let me know if I shouldn’t use this gif
People don’t choose the lives they’re born into, it’s completely random. No one questions this, but when you think about it, it is a bit odd. One day you’re born into a life full of different characteristics that are only specific to you. Granted someone can have a very similar life as you but it can’t be exact. You could drink milk on a Tuesday, but that similar person didn’t simply because it wasn’t on sale. The environment you’re given by life isn’t one you can reject. You have to accept it and hope to get the best out of it. You can’t decide to no longer have a brother even if you don’t want one. That doesn’t mean what life gives you is fair. Often enough, life is cruel.
By the time a young man is twenty two, he is making important decisions in his life. That could be pursuing a master’s degree, moving somewhere new, or taking on your family’s business. Jeonghan, in a way, had taken on his family’s business. He had known all his life that he would one day lead The Ban-Yeoja after his father retired or died. It was a simple but major fact of his life that he couldn’t just get rid of. At first, Jeonghan fancied the idea of being rich and so powerful that the law didn’t even affect him, but after learning the sins he would have to commit to have that much power he wanted nothing to do with the mafia life.
The one thing you didn’t mind being ordered to do was ride into the village. Apart from galloping off into the forest, going into the small village was a welcome break from the madness that had descended into your family home. It meant you could see familiar faces again.
“You don’t look well miss, not at all” you smiled walking through the market with Peter and his Aunt. The older woman was worried for you; she could see how thin you were getting. Her maternal instincts wanted nothing more than to take you away from those wrenched women.
“Why do you stay there? You can come live with us! Can’t she Aunt May, it wont be a bother.” You bumped Peter with your hip softy. You didn’t deserve such kindness
Now, only 2 months later, we hit 4 million
It’s so mind blowing!
Of course, I have a little
something-something to celebrate this milestone; nothing much really, just some
gifs of Jack dancing :3 This took longer than I expected it to XD (Also I really hope
these gifs are working!)