6 days of the gym is enough this week

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On the left is me in 2008. 17 and really really fat. On the right is me from yesterday. I spent a lot of my life being pretty fat. Last year was the first time I stuck with going to the gym 5-6 days a week and eating right. I made several attempts in the years before, but couldn’t stick with it. I’m not where I want to be just yet, but it’s the most progress I’ve made. Determined to keep going now. When I get to my goal weight, I’ll be content enough to completely show off my transformation.

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Melbourne is beautiful. Honestly, it may have been a rough start but this is awesome! I have a lot of housemates, so enough people to ask questions, and I have another day off tomorrow to adjust 😊 I’m curious what I’ll make of the next 6 weeks!

Eating wise it’s gonna be a disaster though 😂 I had Hungry Jack’s for dinner (~1000kcal. Whoop.) but Australian food is super expensive?? So no idea how I’m gonna do that. Either way, my apartment has a swimming pool and a gym (somewhere??) that I’ll definitely use. Also brought my running gear with me :) I’ll make the most of it!

What I am tired of:

Reading blog posts that say ‘girls with a certain look have it so easy and make so much money because of it.’

I am a blonde with big fake boobs. I was not aware that *some* other strippers think blondes with big boobs have it so easy until recently, thanks to tumblr.

Look here. I WORK really hard. I didn’t start stripping at a young age and I paid for my implants before I was a dancer, I got a second job and worked 12 hours a day in the week and gogo danced on the weekends until I could afford my surgery. I WORKED really hard.

I am old enough that some girls in the club could literally be my daughter. Yeah, literally. But I would challenge any one of them to come close to touching my take home, mostly because I don’t sit in the dressing room or on my phone all night! I WORK when I’m at WORK!

I go to the gym 6 days a week, I use three apps to track my diet and fitness stuff. I watch my diet, and for a traveling dancer, that’s not always easy. I get my hair done every 5 weeks and I have the absolute best weave, the best makeup and skincare products. I do Botox every six months and lips once a year. I have amazing shoes and jewelry (nothing basic, nothing), and put thought into looking polished and sexy with my outfit choices. I call all of this “investing in myself.” MANY strippers know, to look your best, it takes some WORK.

I am tired of reading on blogs and stripperweb that girls with a certain look have it easy. I look at blogs sometimes when I see these comments and I am like, WHAT are you wearing??? What is happening with that hair?? And that lipstick??? You are a MESS!! It takes effort to succeed in any job, even this one.

I am not the hottest stripper out there, or the biggest hustler, or the best or the most or whatever else. My look doesn’t appeal to everyone. My own boyfriend prefers brunettes. But I am a hard worker, and I put effort into myself.

And anyone else can do the exact same thing.

We’re in this era of incessant exercise. Don’t get me wrong, I love training. Lifting is my happy place. I love getting stronger, and challenging my mind and body.

What I’ve noticed, though, is that there’s this overwhelming pressure to workout every second of everyday. Sometimes, following elite CrossFitters on Instagram is aggravating. They post shit like “Today was an active rest day, so I just rowed a light 10k, went for an evening swim, and worked on some gymnastics.”

The training frequency of the average person is getting higher. So many people are devoting 3 or more hours to the gym each day.

While I think the proliferation of physical activity is great, it sometimes makes me feel like I’m never doing enough. I train hard 5-6 days per week, and those people make it seem like in order to be in great shape you need to have 10+ hard training sessions weekly. Like you have to constantly be lifting and sprinting and rowing. If you don’t, you’re lazy.

When I take a complete rest day, even though I know I need them, sometimes it makes me feel guilty, like I should still be biking 5 miles or something.

It’s crazy how high the bar is for training now. I can’t help but compare myself to those people.