beautiful

Lost - l.h

Luke looks up from his guitar at the sound of a familiar little giggle. His eyes land on wild, golden curls bouncing softly as the toddler dangles upside-down from Calum’s arms. Little Rory squeals with laughter as Calum spins her around in his arms and Luke feels his heart clench at the sight. Calum sets Rory down on the floor, her little feet stumbling after Calum as he playfully backs away from her. Rory pouts, her small voice echoing across the stage as she raises her arms to Calum. “Again, Cawum, again.”

“You will have to catch me first, kitty.” Calum laughs, using the nickname that has been attached to the toddler ever since she uttered her first word, which to Luke’s dismay was a very distinctive meow and not the word dad.

Rory giggles as she breathlessly runs towards Michael, colliding into him and wrapping her tiny arms around one of his legs. “Help me, Moochael!”

Luke finds himself staring at the scene. Michael scoops the toddler into his arms, shielding Rory from Calum as his outstretched fingers try to reach her ticklish sides. Rory squirms in Michael’s arms, extremely satisfied that she has managed to capture the attention of two of her uncles.

“What are you thinking of?”

“Hm?” Luke turns his head to the side to where Ashton has appeared. Luke’s eyes darts back to his daughter, her chubby arms now wrapped around Michael’s neck as he whispers something in her ear. “I just… the more Rory develops an actual personality the more I see her.”

Ashton sighs softly, running his fingers through his hair. “I know.”

“I wish she was here to see her grow up.” Luke puts down his guitar. “Rory should have a mom.”

Luke often wondered if it would ever stop hurting. If his heart one day would heal back to the happy state it had once been in. He knew the answer to that, of course. Time made the ache less intense, but once the grief has settled in it won’t ever leave.

The first months were the worst, because it seemed so unreal. One moment you had been there, kissing his lips good morning and bouncing a sleepy Rory on your hip.

I’ll be back before you know it.

But then when you were supposed to come back you didn’t, and Luke got the scariest phone call of his life. With one-year-old Rory bundled up in his arms he went to your sister’s house, waiting for what he hoped would be a much better phone call.

A phone call came, although it did not contain anything positive. Luke remembers sitting in the living room, watching the closed door to the bedroom with his heart screaming in his chest and Rory snoring in his arms.

No one ever uttered the words she’s dead, but no one had to. The door to the bedroom had flung open, your sister running outside, a tortured scream erupting from her as she sank to her knees. That was all the confirmation anyone needed.

Luke found himself living on a roller coaster. One day the tears would stream without a stop, another day all he could feel was anger. He found himself reaching for you every time he woke up, grabbing his phone whenever he saw something funny that he knew you’d love.

It took Luke weeks to be able to even hold Rory again. Her big eyes a copy of yours, always staring into his. He moved in with Ashton for a while, not able to exist alone in the apartment where he had once dreamed about a future with you. Any plans of announcing an upcoming tour and writing sessions for a new album had to be cancelled. Luke couldn’t function, and the boys found themselves worried when they looked at their best friend. Blue eyes dull and without the glittering emotions that would usually shine across Luke’s face like an open book.

“She should have a mom.” Ashton agrees, his voice soft in that way it always is whenever he speaks to Luke about things like this. “But she does have the best dad in the world, one that will take care of her and give her everything she could ever need.”

“I just…” Luke groans, finding that he needs to look away from Rory, her little face glowing with satisfaction as Calum plants a kiss on her cheek. “She will not remember her. She won’t remember her voice or her laugh or the way her nose would scrunch up whenever she cried.  She won’t remember anything about her own mother, and it pains me, Ash.”

“I know it does, Lu. I know.” Ashton drops a hand on his shoulder, sighing. “But she will hear every story and every memory we have of her. She will see videos and pictures and she will know how much her mother loved her. We’re going to make sure of that.”

“I just don’t want to fuck her up. I want her to be happy and I’m…” Luke swallows, the familiar feeling of tears welling up in his throat appearing. “I’m afraid I’ll always feel this lost without Y/N. I’m afraid I’m going to fuck up everything and ruin everything for Rory.”

“The pain will never go away, Luke. You loved her, it’s always going to hurt.” Ashton looks at Luke, eyes filled with all the big brother-concern he feels for Luke. “But it will hurt less, and it won’t be as intensely of a grief. And you won’t feel lost forever. You might not realize it yourself, but you’ve come miles from where you were two years ago. You’ll be fine, and so will Rory.”

“Thank you.” Luke’s voice drops to a whisper, afraid that it might break if he speaks any louder.

“Daddy!” Rory’s voice slices through the bubble Luke has found himself in with Ashton. He looks to the side and watches as Rory squirms away from Calum, her little legs now carrying her towards him.

Luke bends down, a soft smile tugging at his lips as he watches Rory. Golden curls wild and cheeks rosy from laughing. She collides into his open arms, her little fists grabbing onto Luke’s t-shirt for dear life. “What is it, baby girl?”

“Cawum’s gonna get me!” She shrieks with giggles, struggling to climb up on Luke’s lap, pulling hard at his t-shirt where her fists refuse to let go.

“Calum’s going to get you? Oh no. I better save you, then.” Luke scoops Rory up in his arms, standing up with her on his hip. “He won’t be able to tickle you all the way up here.”

Kitty!” Calum groans, pushing his bottom lip out in a playful pout as he stops in front of Luke, hands on his hips. “How am I supposed to tickle you now?”

Rory giggles, pushing out her own bottom lip the way her uncles have taught her to. Then her little head drops to her dad’s shoulder, a big yawn erupting from her.

“Are you sleepy, baby?” Luke runs his fingers through her curls, his cheek pressed against the top of her head.

At that, Rory’s eyes open wide and she squirms in Luke’s arms. “No! I’m not sleepy!”

But Luke knows his daughter, and her blue eyes tell a different story.

“I think you are, silly.” Luke pokes her in the stomach, earning a soft giggle. “Everyone’s going to nap, baby. Otherwise, we won’t have the energy to play.”

Rory stares at her father in disbelief, brows furrowing as she thinks hard. “We can’t play?”

“Not without a nap. Look at uncle Cal, Ash and Mikey.” Luke gestures to the boys, and without having to ask they all yawn, stretching out their arms as if they are tired. “They’re really tired. They won’t be able to play without a nap.”

“Okay.” Rory finally nods, accepting her fate with the knowledge she will be able to play even more afterwards. But then she looks up at Luke, raising her little hand to his face, her palm softly patting Luke’s scruffy cheek. “Daddy sleepy too?”

Luke feels his heart warm at the little touch, his lips stretching out in a fond smile at his daughter. “Yes, Daddy will nap with you.”

Rory seems satisfied with the answer as she once again puts her head on his shoulder, her eyes struggling to stay open. Luke squeezes her closer in his arms as if trying to protect her from the world with his arms wrapped around her.

He wishes more than anything you’d be here with him, spoiling the little girl with unconditional love. But you can’t. And so Luke closes his eyes, promising himself that he will do whatever it takes to fill Rory’s life with as much love a little girl could ever need.

Luke walks towards the green room, Rory safely wrapped up against his chest. He drops his lips to the top of her head, his nose in her soft curls as he leaves a kiss on her forehead. “I love you, baby girl.”

-

taglist - @irwinkitten @irrevocablylukes @astroashtonio @plaidpantsluke @wrappedaroundcal @blameiuke @pumpkinsmashton @catchinqcalum @qualitylu @flannelpunkcalum @therainydays4 @calumsdemons @dukehoods @darynn

missing out | a.i

Originally posted by 5sospicturesque

requested: not really but i’m on a torture train today
pairing: ashton x reader
notes: this one is technically @astroashtonio‘s fault as it’s sugar daddy!ash #sorrynotsorry and it’s fluffy have fun weeeeeeee find the song puns
word count: 1.8k!!

Keep reading

I’ll Be There : {C.H}

Requested : No

Pairing : Calum Hood x Reader

Word Count : 925

Authors Note : I may rewrite this, not entirely how i envisioned it. Send in requests if you have them though, i will try to get them out when i have time to.

-

You felt the tossing and turning from the other side of the bed and tried to keep your eyes shut and let sleep find you again, but it was no use. Calum was having a hard time sleeping again, it’d been happening nearly every night for the past week and Calum had yet to explain himself to you. He’d just shake his head and give you a weak smile, telling you it was nothing and that he was okay. His words failed to reassure you however.

Sighing after a moment you finally let your eyes creak open and rolled over onto your side, propping yourself onto your elbow and gazed at your loving fiancé.

Sweat was covering his body like a film, his chest was rising rapidly, his hair was a mess from the constant tossing and turning. He looked like a mess, you were going to calmly wake him up, but once you saw that some tears had escaped his eyes, that did it for you.

“Calum!” you say, panicked concern lacing your words as you pushed against his shoulder with one hand and your other running through his hair. “Calum!”

“(YN)?” he mumbled.

“Calum!” you say again, pushing a little harder and finally his eyes opened, a hand reached up to rest on top of yours. “Calum, what happened? Don’t tell me it was nothing, baby, you look like you’ve just had the worst nightmare a person could have.”

Calum didn’t answer you, he only tightened his grip on your hand and pulled you so that you were lying on top of him, his hands finding their way to the back of your head and around your waist, securing you to him. His heart beat continued to race below your head, you turned your lips to place soft kisses along his neck in a slight hope of comforting him.

You weren’t in any hurry to get an answer out of him this time, you could tell that this dream had been worse than the rest and he needed to come out of it on his own. His hands continued to run through your hair and along the bared skin at your waist, he always did that when he needed to calm down. No words were spoken, just the silence of the night and the slowing of Calum’s breaths as he held you.

Sleep was beginning to find you again when you felt Calum underneath you, squirm up so that he sat against the headboard, keeping you against him. His breathing had slowly returned to normal, you tilted your head back to look at him and saw that even though his breaths returned to normal, he still wasn’t okay, tears still escaped down his cheeks.

“It was bad.” He croaked, his voice raspy from the internal screaming he had done in his sleep before you’d woken up. “Don’t leave me. Promise me, please.”

Softly, you placed a hand on his cheek, turning his head to face you. “Calum, I will never leave you. I promise you that, you’re stuck with my crazy ass forever.” Your attempt at humor brought a small smile to his face and you relaxed the smallest bit you could. “There you go.”

“With the wedding getting closer, I keep worrying that you’re going to decide that I’m not the one you want to be with anymore. That this lifestyle is too much. I’m afraid that I’ll wake up one morning and you’re going to be gone, not a trace of you left in this house. It’s stupid, I know.” He huffed. “I just can’t help it.”

Maneuvering yourself in Calum’s hold so that you could get a better look at him, you held his face in your hands. “Is this why you’ve been smoking more lately? Hard time sleeping lately? Stressed out over these fears?”

A small nod.

A sigh escaped your lips. “I promise you Calum, I’m not going anywhere. This is a crazy lifestyle yes, but, it’s become my life and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I want you, and only you. You don’t have to worry, I’ll be here every morning when you wake up, every night when you go to sleep. And when those doors open at the church next week, I promise you that you’ll see me walking down that aisle towards you. I’ll be there. I promise.”

This time a true smile appeared on Calum’s face. “We’re getting married next week.”

If it was possible, a bigger smile appeared on your face as you leaned in and gave Calum a quick kiss. “We’re getting married next week, now, let’s get some beauty sleep so we can prepare for the wedding. We don’t want to look like people who belong in a horror movie.”

Calum let out a chuckle that warmed your heart. “That’d be quite some wedding.”

“It would be,” you agreed, “but for now, we’ll leave that to a future time and just worry about getting back to sleep now, okay?”

He nodded and together, you two lied back down and you rested inside of Calum’s arms, his gentle heartbeat sending you to a land of peaceful dreams.

Once you were asleep again, Calum glanced down at you and felt his heart warm and his worries cease. A perfect angel was resting in his arms and next week she was going to be his wife. His worries seemed silly now, with you in his arms, Calum drifted off to the first night of peaceful dreams he’d had in a long time.

anonymous asked:

“My mom keeps setting me up, so I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend” with ash pleaseeee

Fake Dating - #11. My mom keeps setting me up, so I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend.

-

Originally posted by emptyymind

-

“Oh, sweetheart! One of the girls I work with has a son around your age and I think he’d be perfect for you,” she squeals and I internally groan, leaning forward while rubbing a hand over my face.

My mother has probably set me up on a lot of dates. Which isn’t totally normal for a parent to do… At all. I let out a sigh, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear as she continues to talk all about this guy.

Ashton, my roommates friend, walks into the living room with a couple beer bottles between his fingers. He gives me an adorable smile as he walks into the kitchen.

I bite my lip, my eyes moving after him. Jesus, he’s so cute. “Hey, ma? I gotta go. I’ll see you this weekend,” I tell her while getting off the couch.

“Okay, sweetheart. I’ll make sure Jeremy is there so you can meet hi-,”

“Ma! That’s not necessary. I-I actually have a boyfriend,” I stutter. My eyes meet Ashton’s as he stops in front of me, two fresh beers in his hands as his eyebrows furrow together. “Yeah, he’ll be there this weekend. Yes, I love you too. Bye.”

“You have a boyfriend? I don’t remember Mike ever talking about one,” he teases and I roll my eyes.

I run my fingers through my hair, letting out a quiet sigh as I grab one of the beers from Ash’s hands.

“Sure, you can have that,” he laughs and his dimples show.

“My mother has been up my ass about getting a boyfriend,” I mumble, tapping my fingers against the neck of the beer bottle. My eyes widen, an idea coming to mine as I snap my head up. “Ash! Are you doing anything this weekend?”

His lips part, moving slightly as his eyes move towards Mike’s bedroom.

“C'mon, please? My mom keeps setting me up, so I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend,” I mumble while reaching out to grab his forearm. I give him my best puppy dog look, watching his hazel eyes roam.

“I-Y-Yeah, sure,” he mutters and I let out a quiet squeal. I wrap my arms around his neck, muttering a bunch of thank you’s into his ear. His arm wraps around my waist, hugging me back as Mike’s door opens.

“Ash! What’s taking so lo-oh,” Michael pauses, stopping in his tracks as his eyebrows raise. “Gettin’ cozy with my roommate, bud?”

Ashton and I pull away from each other as Mikey wiggles his eyebrows at me. “Shut up,” I laugh and playfully punch his arm. I hand him his beer, giving the two of them one last smile before retreating to my room.

-

Ashton and I sat close together as my family was conversing with him, getting to know him better. I couldn’t help but chew on my bottom lip, his hand burning a hole on my thigh as it rests there. My fingers are itching to grab his and lace our fingers together.

A laugh erupts from his lips, my heart fluttering at the cute sound. My eyes drift up towards him, looking over the side of his face as he converses with one of my cousins.

I press my lips together into a thin line, sliding my hand under his and interlocks our fingers. His hazel eyes move down to mine before glancing at our hand. Ashton smiles softly, squeezing my hand while turning his head back towards my cousin, Josh.

I lean my head against his arm, my stomach doing flips as I take in our couply act and his thumb rubs the back of my hand gently.

-

The two of us walk down the hallway towards my apartment, my fingers clasped together in front of me as I couldn’t help the smile on lips growing.

“Thank you for doing this,” I tell him, glancing up at the drummer as he smiles down at me. “I really appreciate it.”

Ashton shoves his hands into his pocket as we stop at my door. “It’s not a problem. Honestly, I’ve been wanting to get to know you a bit better. I’m glad I offered to be your fake boyfriend for a few hours,” he confesses and my cheeks heat up a bit.

“Um, if you ever wanna hang out… like just the two of us, I’m down for it,” I tell him, biting my bottom lip as I try not to smile.

“I’d love too,” he muses and grins. His dimples indent in his cheeks and I lean up on my toes, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

I unlock my door, stepping inside and turns back around to face him. We kept eye contact the entire time I close the door, the smile on my lips widening as soon as the door latches. I rest my forehead against the wooden door, a sigh leaving my lips.

“Good time?” Mikey asks and I jump slightly, quickly turning around as he looks over his shoulder on the couch.

I nod my head, walking into the room and plops on the couch beside him. “Fantastic time. I uh, I might like him a lot,” I confess while blushing a bit.

“I know,” Michael comments and my lips part in surprise. “What? You’re not exactly subtle at hiding your feelings.”

(a/n: this is the second time I wrote this because my phone died and lost everything 😭)

anonymous asked:

Calum with a bi girl?

Eeeek I’m so happy you asked this. I’m Pan by the way so I’ll squeal for any LGBT stuff…


Anyway…. so firstly he’d be really supportive. And he’d probably be very open about his support to. He’ll tell interviewers off who dare to say anything about it and he’ll most certainly preach acceptance. I also think that he might put a mini bi flag on his mike stand at one point. Like he sees a fan with one in the audience and asks for it. And through the whole show he kinda just looks at his and immediately starts smiling cause it reminds him of you.


I also have this scene in my head… so the two of you are walking down the street and you see a really good looking girl. The girl looks over at you guys and smiles. The two of you kinda just freeze and can’t compute. And then you both look at each other and burst out laughing cause you both just did the ‘holy shit she’s hot’ thing. And I feel like Calum would just pull you into him at that moment, he’d try to kiss you but he’d be smiling too much so he’d settle for saying ‘Man, I fucking love you.’

Please Check These Blogs Out!!!

so I do try and not promote my side blogs very often but i made three blogs which I am immensely excited for and hoping you guys may be interested in as well

they are..

@outfits-5sos-should-wear

@outfits-crystal-should-wear

@outfits-bryana-should-wear

they are all outfit blogs which showcase outfits which I feel all the guys of 5sos would look good wearing and what Crystal and Bryana would look good wearing

even if you are not fans of these people it’s also aesthetics of outfits!! and it would make me so much motivated to have some followers who are as keen to see my posts as i am to post them :))))

Tags(I’m Sorry, its only the cashton network tho!!)

@cashton-queen @lurhemmings @ghostsofhood @mysticalhood @gigglyirwin @lukescherrypie @ripashtonscar @calumamongmen @calumvertigo @comingcalum

It’s Complicated Pt.3 // Hogwarts 5SOS

Pt. 1 Pt. 2

Calum ended up being in four of her classes. Sometimes, she swore he did these fucking things on purpose. Potions to be honest was really the only one she had to worry about, because they sat at a table with Michael and Rachel. Rachel was on a strange self-improvement kick ever since Michael gave her a moral philosophy book an an end of the school year gift. Part of her grand master plan was defusing Kaelyn and Calum’s rather strained relationship. Her respect for Rachel was the only thing standing in between her and sitting with Parvati on the other side of the classroom while also sending bewitched paper planes into Calum’s cauldron when he wasn’t looking.

Keep reading

things each 5sos album reminds me of

somewhere new: awkward first kisses, nervous stuttering, cool nights, felt tip pens, knit blankets, dim lit rooms, warm coffee, cutoff jeans, worn out tshirts, chipped nail polish, cold kitchen tiles, chapped lips

5 seconds of summer: hot summer days, fast cars, flirting, makeout sessions, bonfires, first heartbreak, sneaking out, bottle caps, acoustic guitars, streetlights on an empty street, colorful beads, fireworks, fresh cut grass

livesos: sweat, guitar riffs, broken drum sticks, lightening, mosh pits, sore throats, cherry lollipops, smudged mascara, energy drinks, 24 hour drive thru’s, ripped holes in shirts, rubber bracelets, heavy breathing, warm beers

sounds good feels good: lilac, the sound of the ocean, silver coins, paint canvases, cloudy days, willow trees, soft pillows, speeding down the highway, skyscrapers, paying in change, laughing til you cry, deep colored sunsets, sprinklers

youngblood: hickeys, full moons, crowded clubs, vodka shots, cartilage piercings, black eyeliner, loud bass booming through speakers, heartburn, the lump in your throat before you cry, high heels, the smell of cigarettes, broken mirrors

Best Friend
5sos
Best Friend

you’re welcome

when calum sang “we’ve got our whole lives but livin’ ain’t cheap” i felt that shit in my soul AND my bank account

4

At last, I finally did it. I finished all three jackets!!!
I’ve never done anything like this before and the amount of work that went into designing these and painting them by hand was enough to make me wanna smash my head into a wall several times.
I wanted to to take the old 5SOS eras and mix it with 5SOS3, i.e. red, black and white colour scheme from their first album meets youngblood and SGFG x 2016 silhouettes meets youngblood lyrics.
I hope you guys like them as much as I do!

it would make me the happiest girl if you guys could do me a favour and RT or tag the boys on twitter here:
https://twitter.com/leaknielsen/status/1048978899575734272