Heey everyone, please remember to check out this music video that I made for Broken Home. It’s really emotional and I think it’s important for everyone to watch and to see how much 5SOS do help teenage girls struggling with their parents fighting etc. :-)Link Here
”Where do you keep your candle lights?” He yelled in confuse while
trying to get his phone to work, the screen showing the indication of a need of
a charger and he rolled his eyes in response. Focusing back on the cupboards in
your kitchen he looked around confused but was only met by plates and fancy win
glasses. “Do you want scented ones or just normal?” You yelled back while
looking into your closet with the electricity supply, trying to find the source
of sudden blackout. You clearly were the only one on the street having this
problem. “Why would that even matter, Y/N?” He questioned with a raised eyebrow
and earned a giggle from you in response. “Well, maybe you liked the smell of
lavender.” You replied after giving up on trying to figure out what was going on
without the source of light. Walking back into the kitchen while holding onto
objects to guide yourself you giggled slightly when you could see Luke’s shadow
searching. “I think it’s in one of these, actually.” You admitted and saw how
his shadow casted over yours but that was when a hand was laid on you. “Please
tell me this is your arm or something.” His voice showed clear panic and
innocence but he didn’t remove his hand. “It’s not.” You almost had to hold in
a laugh when Luke removed his hand away from your boob in one fast movement,
the blush clear on him even in the darkness. “Let’s just pretend that never happened.”
“How does he even manage to sleep on such a small couch?” You questioned
in wonder while looking down at him with a warm smile, removing some of the
curls sticking to sweaty forehead. His cheeks were flushed in a deep shade of
red and his breathing was uneven due to his stuffed nose. “He’s sick Y/N and
we’re in a dressing room, what did you expect?” Michael chirped in and looked
up from his phone shortly. “I expected him at least to shove me away from the
couch so he wouldn’t have to be crowded in the other end in a fetus position.”
Michael grinned slightly by your words while shaking his head and readjusted
the snapback on his head. You looked down at Calum again by the sudden movement
he was making, probably by the voices, and your eyes widened slightly when his
hand came up innocently to your chest. Your eyes widened slightly by his sudden
sleepy action, his jaw falling slightly. “Well that was fucking smoothly done.”
You looked away by Michael’s sudden comment and laughed so hard the whole couch
was shaking. Trying your best to remove Calum’s hand from your boob without
waking him up you failed miserably. “What is going on?” He questioned confused
and furrowed his dark eyebrows. You looked over at Michael shortly trying to
make him zip while looking back at Calum with an innocent smile. “Nothing Cal.
Just go back to sleep.”
“Come on Y/N, is that all you’ve got?” He yelled loud over the music
while swinging his arms in the air to the beat of the music, the cup in his
hand fully empty. You lifted your hand in the air to show your middle finger
while trying to drown down the beer in your glass, feeling completely defeated
by his fast drinking. “It’s not fair you’re totally cheating!” You yelled back
after taking a short break to catch your breath, still having remains in the
glass. Michael looked at you with wide eyes in pure innocence but the drops of
beer still lingering on his chin along with huge stains on his t-shirt clearly
spoiled otherwise. “Listen Y/N, you just gotta realiz-“ He stopped in track
when he wrapped his arm around your waist to pull you into his side, but his
arm being too high and brushing the side of your boob. “Well that is definitely
an accident that I don’t regret right now and luckily won’t remember in the
morning.” He winked and moved his hand down to your hip instead apologizing.
Rolling your eyes by his small action you raised your glass in the air and
clinked with his. “Cheers, mate.”
“Oh my god Y/N why do you fill so much?” He complained while trying to
find a decent spot for him to rest on without getting pain in his neck or
shoulder. “Fill so much? You’re at least double the size of me, Ashton?” You
argued and nudged your elbow into his back while being pressed against the wall
of his bunk. The place was completely cramped with the two of you trying to fit
inside. “You were even the one suggesting we should sleep in here instead on
the couches!” “Because the couches are lame and they don’t have fairy lights.” He
giggled while moving around so his chest was pressed against your back. Might
as well spoon now that you were so close. “But at least we are able to breath
in the back area of the couch, this place is hotter than a freaking sauna.” You
moaned slightly while pressing your cheek into your shared pillow, feeling
Ashton’s curls tickle you from behind. “Come on Y/N admit it’s cozy. It only
makes our friendship closer that we can survive through this.” He breathed
while closing his eyes shut and rested his head close to yours. Cheekily moving
his hand up to your waist he brushed it up while caressing your skin but that
was when his hand brushed over your chest. “Did I just?” He almost choked on
his salvia embarrassed but didn’t quite remove his hand in confusion. You had
to muffle in a loud laugh to not wake up the other boys in the bus. “You did.”
You breathed while feeling your cheeks heat up but it probably couldn’t compare
to Ashton’s face that clearly wasn’t blushing up because of the heat. “Well
that’s a great way to embarrass myself. I’m sorry, babe.”
“And you’re supposed to be a good girl” The popular boy said as I dragged him into the Janitor’s closet. “Who said good girls don’t have a wild side” I whispered to Luke while he pushed me up against the wall and roughly kissed and sucked on my neck. I took off his tie and tore off his shirt while Luke did the same to me. Still making out with me, Luke pulled my panties off with my skirt still on. I pulled his pants down to his ankle while he pulled out a condom. I slowly pulled his boxers down. “Jump” Luke said with the condom on his throbbing length. My Legs were wrapped around his hips and my back was pushed up against the wall. Luke slowly entered me. “OH FUC-” I moaned but was cut off by Luke’s hand. “No talking baby, they’ll hear us” Luke said while thrusting into me. “You feel so good, (Y/N)” Luke moaned into my ear. Luke kept thrusting faster which made both of us moan. “I think i’m going to cum” I said with a moan. “Me too baby, let it all out” Luke said while sucking on my neck. After we each reached our climaxes we both got dressed. Luke walked out if the Janitor’s closet with him fixing his tie and buttoning his shirt. I walked out trying to fix my hair. We each separated into different directions. “Woah, what the fuck happened to you?” Calum asked with a confused look. “Let’s just say, Good girls are bad girls that haven’t been caught” Luke said with a smirk.
Calum spread his arms over the tops of the hide couches, waiting for Y/N to return from the restroom. He chuckled to himself when he saw Michael steal tequila shots from an empty table and walk away inconspicuously. “Hey, you.” He turned his attention toward the woman who settled herself next to him, a smile creasing onto his lips as he kissed her forehead. “You know…” She caressed his jaw before continuing, “There’s a bathroom that’s out of order.”
“No man has ever talked or shown any interest in me except for you!” you exclaimed, pointing a finger at him.
“Because they all knew they had to keep their distance because they all knew you were mine.” He smirked, knowingly.
You gave an exhausted yelp and sat down on the floor, tugging on your hair.
“Every time we have a fucking decentconversation where I don’t want to strangle you from the start, you always ruin it! Do you know how frustrating it is to know that someone is in love with you and you try so hard to have a good conversation with them and all they do is ruin it and make you upset and frustrated to where you have to continuously have to start at point one again just so you don’t make it an unhappy marriage, but you just can’t get along, so you just sit there while they say that they love you when you can’t even remotely tell them the same. Do you know how much that hurts?”
“I- I had no idea you felt that way, Y/N, I’m so sorry.” He admitted, advancing towards you, pulling you off the floor and into his embrace. You tried to force yourself to not relax in his arms, but you failed, wrapping your arms around his neck, letting him hold you. He started to rub your back, soothing your nerves. While you ran your fingers through his smooth hair that seemed to give you comfort.
“Thank you, Luke,” you whispered into his hair.
“You’re welcome, my love,” You let him call you that because you knew it would start a new fight and ruin this whole moment you’ve had.
“Please?” Luke asked, pouting his bottom lip, leaning closer to you.
“Luke, you know I can’t let you in my room right now.” you whispered.
“C’mon, sweetheart,” He mischievously grinned and connected his lips with yours, tempting you. Your mind said no, and your heart said you; yet right now, with his lips against yours, your mind wasn’t really working.
“Luke,” you mumbled on his lips.
“No, don’t speak!” He continued placing kisses on your lips before he trailed down your jaw until he reached your neck. After a few minutes of kissing you outside the door of your room, he found the sweet spot on your neck, letting a gasp out of your lips.
“Fine,” you said bringing his head up to your and giving him a bruising kiss before opening to door and dragging him inside. He shoved you on your bed and continued abusing your neck while he toyed with the laces on your back. You were still running your fingers through his hair and on his back. You got tired of his lips being absent from yours and pulled him to you. He gently tugged at the strings and you nodded your head in the kiss while he untied the back of you dress. You started hurriedly untucking his shirt and pulled it off. You quickly rolled over so that you were on top, straddling him, starting out by kissing from Luke’s neck (and leaving a few marks along the way) and making your way down to the hem line of his pants. Looking up at him, you realized he took of the covering so you were just in your corset and underclothes. You stared him right in his baby blue eyes, you moved up his body, giggling, then placed your lips on his. He wrapped his arms around you and turned you around so you were on the bottom.
“Princess Y/N? You have your tea with Lady Celeste in 20 minutes!” You heard someone yelling and knocking on the door.
“Fucking cockblocker…” Luke mumbled. You smiled at him and kissed his swollen lips.
“Princess?” the same person asked.
“One moment, please! Tell Celeste I will meet her in a moment.” You never broke eye-contact with Luke while telling the maid to leave. You got off the bed, just to be pulled back on by Luke.
“Celeste won’t care if you cancel, baby.” Luke whispered, nuzzling his head into your neck. “Just stay here with me and we can finish what we started.”
“I’m having tea with Celeste, wether you like it or not.” You started putting back on the covering of your dress, and brushed your hair so that you couldn’t see the slight bruises.
“I’m gonna miss you.” a voice spoke from behind you. Luke was putting on his shirt. He stepped towards you and kissed you softly before leading you to the door. “I love you.”
“You’re boring.” Linda breathes as she hands me a
glass of coke, her other hand in front of her eyes to shield them from the blistering
sun. I chuckle, dropping my book on my lap and grasping the needed drink with
both hands before taking a sip. “I’m just enjoying having to do absolutely nothing.” I haven’t felt this relaxed in
ages, no worries, no obligations luring around the corner. Just me, sunshine,
free time and a good book. I can’t even remember the last time I had enjoyed
life for a few minutes.
Linda drops onto a sun chair besides me, the ones that
are strategically placed around the pool for tanning. “I haven’t seen Luke
around. Are you still tutoring him?”
I pick up my book again, my eyes scanning over the black letters as I let my
sunglasses fall back onto my nose. “Nah, told him to revise on his own and I’d
look it over with him after the weekend.”
“Finally you took some time off. I’m sick of those
frat boys constantly prancing over.” I can’t help but furrow my eyebrows as I
discard my book again to turn my head and stare at the now smirking Linda.
“Frat BOYS? As in multiple?”
Linda pulls her dress over her head, revealing her hot
pink bikini before she replies. “That tattooed boy, he’s in Luke’s frat, right?”
“Michael? Calum?” I know she is referring to Calum but somehow I hope Michael
needed me for something and didn’t think to ask my number, seeing as how all
three other boys had my number.
“The second one! Calum. Blackish hair, dark eyes? Hell of a tan?”
Linda wiggles her eyebrows and I chortle, nodding my head along to every word
she says. “That’s Calum alright. When was he here?”
“When you and Luke went to get a cup of coffee when he spent so long here…
Monday I think? And the week before sometime as well.”
Luke never mentioned Calum coming over here during our
almost daily meetups. Maybe Luke didn’t know himself and Calum came here for
something totally unrelated. Nevertheless, I am kind of aghast by him showing
up unannounced. How many times had this happened? Was it more than the two
times Linda failed to mention earlier?
“Did he say what he wanted?”
“Well yeah, to talk to you.” Linda states as if it’s
the most obvious thing in the world, and I discard my book completely on the
pavement beside me as I lay my head back, staring into the clear blue sky. Why
would he possibly want to speak with me. I thought I made it clear when I
stormed out of his bedroom that I wasn’t agreeing to the call you later bullshit. I considered myself more than just a cheap
hook-up and even though it hurt to make such mistakes, I wasn’t dumb enough to
make them twice.
“Yeah Rosalee?” I lift my head up and turn it sideways
to see the blonde approach me. Her walk towards us is tentative, almost as if
she’s afraid for whatever that’s about to occur.
“You have a visitor.” Rosalee awkwardly states, stopping a meter in front of me
as she rubs her elbow in circles. “You know Sher and Luke by now dear, just
tell ‘m to come over.” I shrug my shoulders and turn my head again, closing my
eyes as I feel the sun burn on my skin, giving me a healthy glow and I breathe
out, trying to relax again. I could feel my day of nothing slipping away from me and there was nothing to do about it.
“Uh – It’s Calum.” I sit up straight as soon as the
words leave her lips and am just in time to see Linda give me the
I-told-you-so-look before she gets up and curls her arm around Rosalee’s
shoulders. I know she’s trying to do good by leaving us alone, but right now I
don’t want to be. I didn’t anticipate him coming over this instant and I’m
unprepared, kind of curious but also terrified by his presence.
I get up into a sitting position, turning around and seeing none other than
Calum Hood standing on the grass, his body dressed in his signature black
skinnies along with a ripped muscle tee.
“You’re ignoring me.” I roll my eyes, taking the towel
that’s hanging off of the head rest to wrap around my bikini-clad body. I
thought that ignoring someone was the
most logical thing after last time’s occurrences. Apparently, I was wrong in
Calum’s eyes. I stand to my feet and face the boy who is slowly creeping
“How can I ignore you when I don’t hear from you?” I think back about the
promise of calling me over a week ago and a scoff leaves my lips almost
immediately. I should’ve known better. I shouldn’t have drunk that night and I
sure as hell shouldn’t have done that. Even though if a later description would
“I texted you, I came over. You just disappear off of the face of the earth,
only Luke sees or hears you.” Calum states with an aggravated tone, crossing
his arms over his chest as he stares me down. He almost sounded as if he were
jealous of me only speaking to Luke. But Luke and I speaking had a purpose.
Calum and I speaking didn’t. Although Calum has sunglasses covering his own
eyes, I can feel them boring into me.
“I literally heard two minutes ago that you came over.
For what reason I still don’t know. And do you want me to reply to a text
merely stating hi? What do you think I am?” I clutch my towel closer to my body
as I see his head slightly tilt, feeling his gaze wandering along my exposed
Calum seems flabbergasted, his mouth slightly hanging
open as his arms uncross and drop to hang limply amongst his side. “Why did you
“I – Well, you ignored my texts and – “
“I have no obligation towards you Calum. Have you never had a girl ignore you
before? Is that what this is about?”
“You’re a fucking bitch, Y/n. For once I wanted to
actually hold my word and I guess it was with the wrong person!” Calum yells,
stepping closer towards me as his tall frame towers over my smaller one. “I
didn’t expect you to Calum, please don’t feel liable for making me feel okay.” I’m not sure if it’s anger that I
feel bubbling in the pit of my stomach, along with a hint of curiosity at his
words. For once.
Calum scoffs and he takes a defensive stance once
more. “I thought I did a better job than okay,
I can’t help but roll my eyes and raise my arm to lightly push his chest. Of
course he has to make a sexual reference instead of taking this seriously when
“You know damn well that’s not what I mean, Cal.”
“Why do you
ignore me? Did I do something wrong?” Now it’s my turn to take a defensive
stance and I cross my arms over my chest, clutching the towel in that way so
nothing would be too visible, although he had seen all already.
“How about throwing me out like I’m a withering vegetable?” I almost yell out,
throwing my hands in the air and I feel my towel drop to the floor. Calum’s
gaze immediately transfixes onto my bosom and I raise my hand to smack him
across the cheek but he stops me with his fingers curled around my wrist.
“I’m a man, what do you expect? And don’t compare
yourself to a vegetable.” I try to break my arm free but he keeps a firm yet
gentle grip, lowering my arm but still holding on to it. I think he realised
the second he let go I would go for a second attempt of marking his face with
my small fingers.
“I thought we were at least more than acquaintances, Calum. I don’t even know
why. Still you throw me out as if I’m one of your cheap slags.” Calum’s grip on
my arm tightens again and I see his mouth pull into something that lets the
tiniest bit of anger breaking through.
“Excuse me, you tried to escape my bed while I was asleep. What do you call that?” I break
my wrist free and rub the tender skin with my other hand, biting my bottom lip
as I am reluctant to answer.
“Trying to get out before you kick me out like you did?”
“If you didn’t try to leave, like everyone else, I might’ve let you stay.” Calum breathes, his
lips slightly parted before his tongue darts out to lick his bottom lip slowly.
“You think with that reputation of yours I wanted to stay and find out?” I reciprocate his tone, taking a deep, visible
breath as my heart hammers against my chest. I have no idea where this
conversation is going but I find it thrilling to feel all these emotions again.
I thought we were friends! I thought you were different.” Calum bursts but his voice wavers towards the end and I
have no answer for him. Perhaps I had judged too soon. But I find it rather
normal that in a situation like this, my normal response would be to flee.
“But if you can’t see past my reputation, I don’t need a friend like you.”
Calum states, nodding his head before he turns on his heel, stalking away
Even though Calum pulled a dick move, we had started
on the wrong foot, I’d rather have him as a friend, then not at all. “Calum!”
Damn my stupid crush. I could’ve ended it by letting him walk away.
He stops in his tracks, turning his head as I walk over to him.
“Let’s give it a shot. Friends?” He smiles, his pearly white teeth coming into
view before they sink into his lower lip. “Friends.” This will feel sore very,
“Are you and Cal still not speaking?” Luke questions
as soon as we sit down on my queen sized bed, his books scattered between us. I
can’t help but scoff loudly at his question.
“If you showed as much interest in biology as you did in my love life, you
would’ve passed with honours.” I chuckle as I skim through his biology book in
search of the right chapter for today.
“Ah come on Y/n, don’t keep me in the dark. This is my
daily soap opera.” Luke clutches my upper arm between his large hands, juggling
my body, a groan leaving my lips in stutters. Luke was like the annoying little
brother I never had – thank god, an older one was bad enough.
“He came over – yesterday? I think.”
“Well we’re friends and keeping it that way, I
presume. And friends don’t sleep with one another. Is that a suitable answer
“Calum won’t keep his end of that bargain.” Luke
laughs, pushing his books to the side before he crosses his arms over his
chest, leaning back on the head rest of my bed with his legs stretched out
along the length.
“What do you mean?” I push his books back towards him,
granting him with a pointed look while motioning to his books. “I mean you’re
hot. Calum can’t resist you.”
I start laughing so loud I drop onto the bed, my arm thrown over my eyes as I
can feel tears prickle and my abdomen burning from the amount of laughter.
“Focus on DNA replication instead of my looks, Luke.
Or you’ll never pass.” I turn onto my stomach, my feet in the air, head resting
on my hands.
“Sometimes you got to take time to appreciate a few things.” Luke points out as
he drops the thick book on his lap, winking overdramatically before fixating
his gaze on his book.
“Stop flirting or I’ll tell your girlfriend on you.
But thank you, you’re too sweet.” I blink a few times and I open my mouth to
ask Luke something else, but I’m interrupted by my phone buzzing just within arm’s
Your friends with benefits relationship with Calum had only lasted two days so far but you knew this was the best decision you’ve made in a while. All of your friend group was scheduled to go to this silly concert on the cruise ship you were on. You and Calum both were dreading going because it honestly sounded like the most boring two hours ever. You were currently walking beside Ash and his girlfriend talking about the amazing dinner you just had when Calum comes out of nowhere and whispers in your ear.
“What do you say we make tonight interesting?” His smirk told you that maybe this concert wouldn’t be so boring after all.
Of course Cal somehow got a seat right next to you and when the show began the lights dimmed out and you immediately felt a hand on your thigh. You didn’t want to just give in to his wants so you tried to move your leg further from his hand just to bother him. However he wasn’t going anywhere. In fact, he squeezed your thigh and slipped his hand under your sundress. Another one of your great decisions was bringing tons of sundresses on this cruise, it allowed for easy access and that was all you wanted.
He kept teasing you by drawing shapes with his pointer finger all around your upper thigh for a good ten minutes. Then when he made sure the music got really loud, he snapped the band of your panties against your body. Right after he slipped a finger underneath and began rubbing your clit.
You were so shocked he actually was touching you in public in front of everyone, when he mentioned making it interesting you thought you’d just go to the bathroom or something. It felt so dirty knowing that you were getting off while all of these people were sitting around you, anyone could be watching. After a few minutes of him rubbing you, you’d had enough teasing.
You leaned over and whispered in his ear, “I’ll be in the ladies room if you need me.” Quickly, you stood up and got out of everyone’s way as you made your way to the bathrooms. You expected to have a few moments to yourself before Cal came in so it wasn’t so obvious but as soon as you shut the door it was burst wide open.
He immediately pushed your back towards the wall and put his lips to yours, he was harsh and fast. He was exactly what you needed. His hands soon came up to the straps of your sundress and slid them off your shoulders. He tilted his lips back to catch his breath and let your foreheads rest against each other. For a few seconds he just watched his hands move across your skin, shoulders, arms, hips, until finally he focused back on your face and cupped it to pull your lips back to his. After a quick kiss he then slid your dress down all the way and stepped back to look at you.
“Baby girl you’re just so pretty I can’t help myself.”
“Then why don’t you do something about it?”
This was his cue to jump on you again, he continued at his fast pace and continued undressing you until you were completely naked. He started rubbing your clit again and could feel how wet you were. His smirk sent sparks up your spine and you started to pull at his tshirt.
“It’s not fun being naked alone, join me.”
That was all he needed to rip his shirt off and begin unbuckling his pants. When he was finally naked you both reached for each other and started making out again. Both of your pairs of hands were wandering all over each other’s bodies. Yours landed at their end location first. When you first grabbed Calum’s dick he let out a very frustrated groan. You started rubbing him down and he lost all control. His head leaned back and he had his arms wrapped around you, clinging to you. It wasn’t long before he started whispering dirty things into your ear.
“Wait baby, wanna cum inside that pretty pussy.”
You slowed down and he grabbed your hips to sit you up on the bathroom counter. He lined himself up with you and kissed you while he rubbed up and down your slit with his head. You couldn’t help but whine, you were so tired of the teasing.
“Cal please I need you I wanna feel you inside of me I just need you so bad please.”
That was enough for him, he slipped himself inside of you and you both immediately moaned out. He quickly picked up the pace, you had to grab onto the counters to keep from slamming into the mirror behind you. Cal was fucking you so good you couldn’t help but be so loud. You bit down on his shoulder to keep from having security come knock on the door. Both of your moans and groans were becoming louder as you got closer to your climaxes.
“Fuck baby you’re so tight around me feels so good. You like when I fuck you like this yea? I’m so close, gonna cum all inside of you.”
Calum’s dirty talk was quite possibly the hottest thing you’ve ever experienced. Just by those words you were set off and started clenching around his cock. You let out an even louder moan as you gripped onto his shoulders to keep him close to you. He kept rocking into you during your orgasm and you saw stars. He came soon after you and then he pulled out and you guys caught your breath while pulling back on your clothes.
“During a concert, that’s a new one for the list.”
“Oh so there’s a list now?”
“Of course it’s titled “Y/N and Calum’s fucket list.”
You just rolled your eyes and sighed at him before exiting the bathroom to see the concert was actually over. Whoops.
hi would you write an imagine where y/n gets an anxiety attack while michael is on stage but the backstage people don’t tell him because he’s in the middle of a show but when he sees her after and she tells him why her makeup is smeared and she’s sad he gets pissed and it’s all fluff??? sorry this is so so long! ily
Michael x Reader
Triggers; anxiety, heartbreak
Please read at your own risk about things as serious as anxiety attacks and feelings of depression. I frequently have panic attacks and so this writing about them is coming personally from me. If you have triggers, then I have other stories if you’d like to read them. Remember, you all are shining lights in this world, and if you’re in pain, I’m always here to talk. Ok, on to the story.
Watching Michael on stage was always the highlight of me visiting him on tour. The way his hands moved flawlessly on his guitar, the way the veins in his neck protruded when he sang higher and more powerful notes, and the way he always put his sweat, blood, and tears into every show. Lately the fans have been cheering on the guys to the point where they all cry, and I’ve seen a few tears slip Mikey’s eyes since. It’s an honor to stand here while a legend is going out on stage every night doing what he loves and making people happy about it. And I’m proud to say that legend is now mine.
However, I’m not the only one here for Michael. His ex fling Crystal is still here on tour with them. For a reason that I don’t know, but she sticks around the guys all the time and won’t go back home, but will stay here and follow them around. Even when I go back home, she stays, making sure to try and move in on Michael. I trust him though, and I know that what they had is done, because well, he met me. She often sends me death stares from the backstage couch while the show is going on, and will whisper something in Arzaylea’s ear, both of them looking at me, and proceed to laugh very obnoxiously. It makes me nervous, and it makes my heart beat faster and my skin start to burn up. I could feel my face heating and the feeling of vomit building up in my throat. Quite often I get anxiety attacks. Not just because of her and Arzaylea, but because she triggers feelings inside of me that I tried to suppress when I was in high school. I was bullied everyday, from the timeI walked into the school by the time my car was out of the perimeter. Girls would spit in my face and laugh at me down the hall, one girl even beat me up in the bathroom and it ended with me lying on the tile floor with a bloody nose and busted lip. Boys would often call me ugly, weird, and fat. And sometimes even push up against the lockers or dump their food and drink on me. They hurt me so bad that I ended up dropping out of high school my senior year and did it online, which in my opinion was the best decision I had ever made for myself.
When I met Michael, all those feelings of isolation and being unloved went away. He made me feel like I was a part of something, that I was needed, and that someone finally cared about me and stuck with me despite what others said about me, and the mistakes I’ve made. He accepted me, and then, fell in love with me. As I smiled at him on stage singing his heart and lungs out as ‘Jet Black Heart’ started, I felt another presence behind me. A tap on my shoulder, and I turned around to be faced with my worst enemy.
“You know he still loves me right?” She tried caressing my hair but I smacked her hand away, with a disgusted face and turned back to watching Michael. I heard her chuckle, but my actions didn’t stop her, and she proceeded to talk in my ear.
“He only got with you because he felt sorry for you, because he knew about your whole high school drama that went down, and the reason why all the kids hated you.” I felt the fimilar feeling of burning in my skin start again, and my vision and hearing began to fade slowly, remembering the terrible memories.
“I know all about it too you know. How you slept with some guy you barely even knew at a party, and he ended up getting you pregnant. So you decided to abort it, and that’s why everybody bullied you so bad. Because you’re a slut, because you’re a sleep around, and you’re unsafe and gross. Michael knows it too, he’s just waiting until you’re better again. So why don’t you get out of here while you still can, and stop embarassing yourself. Your baby is probably up there right now seeing how big of a whore her mother is-“ and with that I shoved her, so hard she hit the ground and bashing her head into the floor. I felt my food I had eaten earlier start to come back up again, and I ran straight for the bathroom. In Michael’s dressing room bathroom, I began puking profusely, missing the toilet a couple times because it kept coming out. It was almsot as if the emotions I had hidden deep within myself was now coming back out all at once and it was a lot. My face was burning red, while my eyes cried out enough water to fill a swimming pool. My forehead pounded on all sides, making me begin to vomit more. As I held onto the toilet, I thought about the moment I found out that fuckboy of a jock roofied me, had sex with me, and didn’t even have the decency to wrap himself up. Nobody believed me when I told them that, and the next day when I threw up in the middle of class, everybody knew that I was pregnant. I was called every bad name in the book, and that’s when it all started.
This was how my body reacted to that, it put itself in anxious mode, and tried to physically let it all out, ergo the vomitting, crying, etc. Everyone, including Arz and Crystal, know of my anxiety attacks, and so I’m guessing this is Crystal’s way of making me leave the tour. She might just get her wish.
For what seemed like hours I sat with my back against the bathroom door, huffing and puffing trying to control my breathe, while my hands and legs shook making it hard to sit still. I kept crying, even when I told myself to stop I just couldn’t. I kept checking the time making sure I would look okay when Michael came off stage so he wouldn’t worry about me. He tends to get a little upset when I get like this, definitely not because of my anxiety attacks alone, but because he’s upset with himelf for not being there enough to stop them. I could never blame him for not being able to calm me down fast enough, anxiety is not easy to kill.
I heard harsh banging coming from the door about a half hour later, my breathing and crying still going on. I quickly got up on my shaking legs to open the door, and saw my beautiful man with fear in his eyes ready to pull me into him. My legs immediately gave out, and he caught me into his chest, rubbing my back. I continued to cry into his sweat stained muscle tank.
“Baby, baby what’s going on. Is this another anxiety attack?” He asked frantically, but my only response was a nod, too choked up to say anything.
“Hey, hey hey it’s going to be okay, you just need to tell me what happened ok.” He sat me back down on the floor, and pulled me into his lap. He brought his shirt up my face to wipe the flowing tears, and I swallowed down the vomit still wanting to come back up.
“C-Crystal…mentioned m-my preg…pregnancy…my abor-abortion…I couldn’t, I couldn’t take it Michael!” It was so hard for me to speak, my breathe not even coming out anymore, but only sharp short breathes. Michael punched the wall behind us, leaving me on the ground huddled into myself.
“That’s it, I’m kicking her off the tour. She has no right you were drugged! And that guy didn’t even have the mentality to put a condom on knowing damn well he’d get you pregnant!” He began walking out of the room, before I grabbed his arm to stop him. Still on shakey knees, I stood up.
“Just, take me to the bus first. I need to get out of here.”
Michael laid me down in his bunk, with more blankets and pillows to keep me comfortable. He also brought me a pad and pencil, knowing I like to draw to keep my mind occupied after an attack. He was currently making tea for me as well.
“I’m going to kick her off. She isn’t even a friend to me or the guys anymore, only to Arzaylea, but that’s not enough for me to want her here. You’ll be safe ok. Just draw and wait for me here to get back. Text me if you need anything.” And he kissed my forehead before disappearing off the bus. Hearing the sound of the bus being packed, and feeling the smoke rise out of the tea, I began drawing mindlessly. I was still feeling insanely sick, but for now, everything was dying down and I was starting to feel something I haven’t in a long time. Good.
I watched her from a distance. How the wind blew through her hair, as soft giggles left her cherry stained lips. My demeanor changed when I saw him walk up to her. My hands tightened on wood table, as I watched him touch her, again.
She backed away, slowly into her group of friends. Her smile turned into a straight line, as she played with her purple painted nails. The final bell rang ending school, as I walked to my black Mercedes waiting for Y/N.
I saw her walk over here, looking down at her black ballet flats. She immediately reached for the passenger door, not saying a word, and I think I know why. “How was your day?” I asked. “It was good, until a few seconds ago.” She mumbled. “Can we just go home? I’ll talk to you about it later.”
I heard a faint knock on my door, “come in!” I look from my desk and see Y/N standing there with a worried look on her face. “Ash, can I talk to you?” She asks. “Yeah of course, c’mere.” I say. She sat at the edge of my bed, in front of me.
“Today, before school let out, Ryan um told me something.” She cringed saying his name. I sat up, my fists clenching. “He told me that if I didn’t then he would keep harassing me.” She said.
Blood rain through my veins as I walked over to her. “Y/N, why didn’t you tell me when we were in the car? You know you don’t deserve what he does to you.” I say. “It’s just, Ash I feel safe around you, like I can tell you anything.” She said.
She bit down on her lip, looking at me. Power took over me and I crashed my lips onto hers. “God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to do that.” She sighed. “But we can’t, Y/N, you’re my step sister.” I moaned.
“Yeah, step not blood at all.” She giggled. “Fuck it.” I grabbed her hips and moved her up on the bed. “I think you know what you’re doing to me,” I growled, my hands releasing her waist and slipping down to her thighs, and rubbing the inner skin.
“I’m not doing anything, i think you’re the one who has a dirty mind.“ She mumbled. “I can show you my dirty mind, if you’d like baby girl.” i smiled, grabbing both sides of her jaw, and pulled her lips into mine, enveloping our lips together.
I wasted no time to slip my tongue into her mouth, pressing it upon mine and dominating my lips with her own. I couldn’t help but smile, but it was no smile of innocence. Her legs were pressing together underneath me.
She guided her own hand down to my clothed crotch, palming me through my jeans. My eyes darkened to a deep shade of green, my mouth parting from hers and showing the scowl forming on my lips. She looked up at me, her actions continuing.
Her delicate hands unbuttoning my jeans. “Hands to yourself, princess.” my glare diminished into a playful smirk, releasing the grip to one of her wrists and guiding her hand, now, to the heat between her legs.
“Who’s making you feel that way, hmm, Y/N?” she closed her eyes, taking in the motion of my fingers that began circling her clit from underneath her oversized t-shirt
“I can’t hear you.” My voice was no longer sympathetic, but demanding and low. “You.” She sighed, rolling her hips into the movements I made with my fingers.
Small whimpers fell from her lips as her muscles clenched around my fingers. “Ashton, I’m close.” She moaned. “Mm, you wanna cum for baby girl? Huh?” My movements sped up.
She squirmed underneath me as my fingers rode out her high. “Fuck, it feels so good.” She moaned. I smirked to myself, as she became sensitive from my movements.
“I’m going to have you begging for mercy after i’m through with you.“ with that, I plummeted my lips into the crook her neck, sucking and sloppily kissing every inch between her ear and collarbone, massaging her breasts with each movement of my lips.
“Ash,” she moaned, clinging to my body. “Ashton, please.” I retracted my mouth from her skin, gasping for air and reaching down to the waistband of my jeans tugging them down. “You’re gonna be screaming that all night.”
I rid my jeans and boxers, before lining myself up with her. “You’re on the pill, right baby girl?” I asked. “Yes, now please fuck me!” She whined. “Alright, alright.” I chuckled before slamming into her.
“Fuck you’re so tight.” I groaned. “Ash, move.” She whimpered. I slowly pulled in and out, “Mhmmm,” she moans, her hips thrashing around as her cheeks turned a darker shade of red, tears falling from her eyes. Tears of pleasure. Too much pleasure.
I slowly enter her again, this holding her hips still once I’m fully inside her. “Ashton, please.” She begged. My hips slammed against hers as she gripped the white duvet that laid messily under us. “I’m going to cum.” she cries. “Please.”
“Cum for me baby girl, let everyone know who is making you feel this good.” I moan. “Mm fuck Ashton!” She screams. “That’s it baby, that’s it.” I say. I feel her muscles clench around me as I struggle to move inside her. “Fuck Y/N, I’m close.” I moan. “You wanna cum for me Ash?” she provokes.
“Fuck, you feel so good.” My face scrunched up as I twitch inside her. “Oh my fuck.” I moan releasing inside her. “God, I wish this happened a lot sooner.” She giggled. “Oh it will now.” I smirked.