Anita’s stomach executes a slow, sickening somersault. There’s a noise between her ears that’s like crackling cellophane. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shut up, shut up, shut up. She needs more pills, she needs more booze, she needs more Austin. What she doesn’t need is anyone’s pity. Screw them. Screw Jim. He can rot in hell. Mothefucker!
Anita: Motherfucker.
It’s okay. She’s still the grieving widow. Except now she’s also the irate, incandescent, venom-spitting grieving widow.
Edward: I’m so sorry, Anita. I don’t understand why Dad would have done this-
Saffron: Yeah. What did you do, Mum? You must have pissed him off real bad.
Anita leaps to her feet. Saffron is gasping and giggling at her own audacity. She lets out a mock shriek.
Saffron: I’m sorry Mum! I’m sorry!
Mr. Fowler: Please sit down, Mrs. Aitken.

Daisy’s Present - Part 1 - Movie Nights - Jacob-Verse!AU

It was a good month and a half after Ana moved out that Ward and Skye were able to take it with a smile. At first, Ward didn’t like knowing his baby girl wasn’t around. Skye didn’t care for not having the veritable twin armies that were her children to feed two to three times a day. It gave her purpose. OK, maybe cooking for them was not her sole purpose in life, but she did enjoy it. It was nice having Ana up her ass wanting to eat everything in sight and Jacob silently wanting a sandwich but her son was such a gentleman that he wouldn’t just ask his mother to make him one. Not that he had to, Skye knew when the boy was hungry.

Yes, she refers to her 6’4” 23 year old son as a BOY because he IS. Don’t question Skye.

This end of daily activity left Skye and Ward with a lot of free time on their hands. Now, of course they tried to fill that time with things they never really had the time or privacy for anymore - sex, work around the house, and more sex. Sadly, that got boring for them. Not the sex, Skye was very proud that her and Ward could still keep the bedroom exciting after so many years of marriage. Granted, they were a very adventurous couple and those younger than them were always inventing new toys to try.

No, the boredom came during the part of the day they weren’t naked, which was a good portion of the day. Skye tried to find something to fill the hours, but she was still waiting on the background check to get finished at the pound so she wasn’t even fostering puppies yet. Skye did not do well with boredom, it was part of the reason why she had so many crafts strewn throughout the house. Also, Pinterest is her best friend after Jemma.

An idea came to Ward though, on how to spend their increased amount of free time - watch a few movies they missed out on - and Skye was all for it. The first few movies were very enjoyable to them: the Expendables trilogy, Fast and the Furious, The Secret Life of Pets, Olympus has Fallen, London has Fallen, all of them were captivating to Skye. She had simple tastes, much to the anger of the only other very well off couple in town who want imported everything. She didn’t mind pissing them off. They thought Ana was a poor excuse for a lady. May had to keep Skye and Ward from killing them, but no one ever found out why exactly that family suddenly had to move away and May bought and rented the house out to a large lower-middle-class family complete with the Escalade that the original owners had.

Anyway, the next set of movies were something fairly inconsequential to Skye and Ward, or at least they thought they were. No one knows how Marley & Me wound up in the pile, but it did and Skye wants whoever did that’s head on a platter.

The movie was going fine until near the end, when it was shown that Marley was dying. That broke them, and quickly at that. It was just like Fido! It reminded them of nothing but Fido and all the times they had and now Marley’s dead and May had to come over and clean up the house for them. Skye and Ward were a wreck on the couch for that day and well into the next.

This lead Skye and Ward to make a very simple rule: simple action films and animated comedies ONLY. Never take a recommendation from Ana irregardless of her having gotten an A+ in the Film Theory class she took in high school. She’s evil and mean and her parents are both really pissed at her and really proud at the same time because Ana’s a true asshole just like them.

Now if they could just figure out how Jacob is the way he is, they’d make real progress.

validation😈🙌😍👅 hhngnnhgggfnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn💦😩💦🙌💦😫😫😍😍💦💦💦💦😩😩💯👌✊😍👏✊💦💦💦💦💦 validate this ass ghhhhhhngnnnnnhhggggg🙌👅👅👅💦💦💦💦👅👅💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦😫😫👅👅😫😏💦💦😫hhhhfnngnnhggffuuckkgkkgmnnfhf