Imagine your OTP- Things I've said to my SO
  • "Why the fuck are there three different rolls of paper towels??"
  • "Do we need lessons on how ziplock bags work?"
  • "Taking off my clothes takes effort. I'm sleeping on the futon."
  • "At what point if any did it cross your mind that this might be a bad idea?"
  • "Wake me up if you want something!! Seriously! Sleepy sex is awesome!"
  • "Please kill it. Preferably with fire."
  • "See, this is why we're together. No one else could handle our terrible puns."
  • "I love you. but I swear to you if you keep leaving lunch containers in the sink without putting soapy water in them I will kill you slowly."
  • "Dude, we're old... your brother just left with a 24-pack of bud ready to party, and we're sitting in front of the TV with Netflix and fancy cheese."
  • "These potatoes in the fridge are starting to flower... can I toss them?"
  • "Sleep is for those that haven't been struck with inspiration."
  • "I'll sleep when I'm dead."
  • "Sweetie, I appreciate the thought, but I meant A 50c PACKAGE of reeses, I didn't need the whole candy aisle."
  • "Goddamn it why are you so sweet."
  • "I just got out from babysitting and I am having my tubes tied immediately."
  • "Let me rephrase, I'm getting mongolian. if you'd like, you can come along, but if not, that's cool too. but I want mongolian."
  • "You bought WHAT for HOW MUCH?"
  • "I love your mother, but I almost reached across the table and wrapped my hands around her throat."
  • "Why do we even NEED more bass?"
  • "You may want to hide the alcohol because I may die from how much and how badly I want to drink right now."
  • "Aaaack that freaks me out when you do that!!"
  • "Everything hurts and I'm dying, but I'm not pregnant this month so that's nice."
How to Eat Paleo as a single person on about $5/day

This is super off topic for this blog, but…

I did this for about a year in college. Last night at the LGBTQ center we were talking about healthy eating and I mentioned it, and was challenged to bring in a shopping list/meal plan detailing what I had done.

What I consider Paleo: I lived on my own version of paleo, which I called “Functional Paleo.” I defined this as “no grain, no dairy, no legumes, no refined carbs, and no artificial sweeteners, flavors, or preservatives.” It is not organic, the meat is not free range, and I did not use coconut or other substitute flours for anything (except when cooking for my parents or special occasions). I bought very few things that had multiple ingredients, but didn’t concern myself too much with small amounts of soy or sugar (like in the tuna, stewed tomatoes, or condiments).

My other caveat is that I had (and continue to have) an Aldi near me. All prices cited are Aldi prices as they exist today (though prices can be similar at other value food stores like Marc’s and Save a Lot). You can actually do paleo significantly cheaper than this if you have to, but this level provided enough variety for me to not flip my kitchen table on a regular basis. This is what I did personally.

***Items listed are “Per Week” unless otherwise specified***


  • Eggs- 2 dozen, about $1 (Aldi eggs cost anywhere from 20c to $1.29/dozen, usually on the lower end of that with a limit of six dozen per costomer. I used 50c/dozen here as a good average)
  • Meat- 2lbs of either chicken breast, stew meat, or chorizo, about $8 (get the middle-range (Never Any! brand) chicken, its the same price as the low range if you factor in that the low range has 15% broth in it by weight, which will cook out anyway).
  • Tuna: 2 cans, packed in water, about $1.40


  • Sale veggie- 2 pkg, about $3 total
  • Cauliflower- 1 large, 1.79
  • Broccoli- 1 bag, 1.50
  • Stewed tomatoes- 2 cans, $1 total
  • 3lb Onions- $1.50 (every other week)
  • 3lb Sweet potatoes- $2
  • 10lb Russet potatoes- $3 (once per month)


  • Sale fruit- 2 or 3 pkg, about $4 total
  • Canister Prunes or Raisins- $3 
  • Frozen fruit of choice- $2


  • Whole raw almonds- 1pkg, $5


  • Dark Chocolate- 1 large bar, $1.50
  • Tea- 100 tea bags, $2 (once in a blue moon)
  • Instant Coffee- 120 cups worth, $3 (once in a blue moon)
  • Olive or sunflower seed oil- $3 (once per month or so)
  • Salt- one large canister iodized or box kosher, $2 (literally once per lifetime)
  • Condiments (I excepted these from paleo rules for my own sanity) mayo, ketchup, pickles, mustard, etc…- $1-$2 per item (once in a blue moon)
  • Dried spices- $1 each (get a good blend for about $2-$3 at Wal Mart or collect them separately and make lots of your own $1/spice) (once in a blue moon)
  • Vinegar of choice- $3 (once per month or longer, depending on how much you like vinegar)
  • Bouillon cubes- $2.50 (once in a blue moon)

Assuming you’re starting with an utterly bare cabinet and you buy all of the “once in a blue moon” and “once per month” items on your first trip (including condiments and spices), your initial investment will probably be about $50-60. After that first week, assuming you keep to the intervals outlined here, it should average a little less than $35

Meal Prep Tips:

  • Boil most of the eggs, leave a couple for if you like fried eggs occasionally or want to make banana-egg pancakes. You can easily take boiled eggs in a lunchbox or eat them with prunes or raisins for a quick breakfast.
  • The prunes/raisins and almonds were and still are my go-to easy breakfast.
  • Grate the cauliflower- steam it with salt, oil and spices as a side later or mix it with the crumbled chorizo for a 1-bowl meal
  • Cook the sweet potatoes and regular potatoes ahead of time. There are lots of ways to do this and they are all delicious. They are also easy to pack in a lunch box.
  • Hard veggies like carrots, cauliflower, sweet potatoes, and broccoli are AMAZING when tossed in olive oil, salt, and spices and roasted or broiled.
  • Cook and pull the chicken (easiest in a pressure cooker but you can also boil the crap out of it too). Makes it super versatile. You can make like 10 different things with it and they will all feel different. No more plain chicken boob for you!
  • Stew with the stew meat, any veggies (including onions and potatoes) and spices will give you many easy future meals and can be made with just about anything you’ve got (throw the stewed tomatoes in this too).
  • Tuna salad (with oil and vinegar and spices if you’re really feeling paleo or mayo, onions and pickles if you’re me) and leftover roasted veggies make a great lunch.

Freeform (formerly ABC Family) has announced the line-up for its annual 13 Nights of Halloween programming from October 19-31.

Highlights include The Addams Family, Addams Family Values, Sleepy Hollow, Edward Scissorhands, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Frankenweenie, ParaNorman, and an all-day Hocus Pocus marathon on Halloween.

Read on for the full line-up.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Going grocery shopping with the Avengers

Originally posted by wakandaentertainment

  • Having written out a carefully planned list of thing you need, only knowing the second you walk into the supermarket that will idea go to shit. 
  • You’re in charge of the shopping cart! 
  • “Because Tony last time you fitted boosters to the wheels and we got banned for six months from that store” 
  • Clint and Sam throwing in unnecessary items into the shopping cart. 
  • “We don’t need 102 flossing sticks Sam” 
  • “Ok (Y/N) but what if we do?”
  • Pietro speeding back to grab stuff you missed and Wanda using her magic to get stuff off the top shelf that you can’t reach(and generally being the only ones who are listening to you) 
  • Natasha just brazenly opening a packet of chips while you walk around. 
  • “We haven’t paid for that yet Tasha” 
  • “But I’m hungry” 
  • Tony complaining about the layout of the store and drawing a better blueprint on the back of a cereal box, then getting yelled at for defacing items. 
  • You’d give him the stink eye as he placed the item in the cart sheepishly. 
  • Having Steve add up the items as you go. 
  • Inevitably having an argument over the cost of coffee. 
  • “$5!! That’s ridiculous put it back that’s too expensive” 
  • “Steve it’s only $5″ 
  • Steve is basically the Dad that always goes for the offers to make it cheeper. But you’d draw the line at home brand cookies.   
  • Bruce having to calm you before you got to frazzled and ‘hulked out’ his words not yours! 
  • Sam and Bucky having shopping cart races down the isle’s and knocking displays over. 
  • “I swear to god if you don’t act your age I will smack you so hard into next week. 
  • “Is that a promise doll?” 
  • “Don’t push me Barnes or I’ll put your coco pops back” 
  • “You wouldn’t!”
  • “Try Me” 
  • You’d basically be the Mum Friend trying to wrangle your overgrown avenging children.  

Headcannon Hour

Happy My Birthday To All Of YOU

I know it’s going to be MY birthday, but a present to all of you.
I’ve discounted everything in the Redbubble until midnight tomorrow night. I’ve removed the profit margin completely so discounts on items are anywhere from 50c to €7, you’re getting the stuff at cost price, essentially.

I appreciate people giving me a few euro for the designs now and then (and for my general shitposting), but I know a lot of followers don’t always have the cash, so here it is lads.


“For a moment all she could see were the shadowy men closing in on her, and all she could feel was the cool wrought-iron behind her. Then, suddenly, something gave way and the gate opened impossibly back. She yelped in shock as she tumbled backwards, a warm, golden, glow surrounding her as she fell into warmth.”

- Parallels, @kytrin, @mslead

This was a lil’ something-something I did for b snow and kytrin’s fic. @snogfairy phi if she asks about it again, im blaming u, the rebel in u and the $10 bucks now $23 you lost your chance. now $23.50 wow.

oh how this was one of the most lit things I have ever drawn. I enjoyed drawing it so much bc im weak for hair tyme. also this can be pre much an artist’s interpretation. also took a bit of inspiration from the current cover on ff for the fic rn. 

im ded inside ppl i have lost a potential $23 today.

@doublepasse this is the one.