5 seconds of heartbreak more like it

So...

1. For a couple of seconds I thought Mary might be alive

2.Your allowed chips.

3. Mrs Hudson continues to be a total badass

4. John didn’t you hear Molly Sherlock is KILLING HIMSELF WITH DRUGS

5. Culverton Smith is so slimy and creepy it made me feel uncomfortable to watch him

6. John hitting Sherlock had me flinching

7. I don’t want to die

8. You cock! Trust Sherlock to have me laughing 5 seconds after crying

9. Mycroft bow chicka wow wow

10. Mary giving great advice even from beyond the grave

11. Yay Irene I love Irene

12. Awww Happy Birthday sherlock

13.John crying was the most heartbreaking thing

14. THE HUG! Need I say more

15. Totally thought for a second Euros was Moriarty in disguise. (Seriously I thought he was gonna pull of some elaborate prosthetic mask and be like hiiiiiiii)

What I’ve gathered from the liveblogging: 

  • Kane’s awesome. 
  • Jaha’s endearing himself back to people
  • Jasper was present for like 0.5 seconds. 
  • Octavia’s still murdery and pissed off. 
  • Clarke’s absent with her new bedmate? 
  • Raven’s still a super bitch. 
  • Luna’s so much more precious than we deserve. 
  • Murphy’s still heartbreaking and endearing.
  • Roan’s DramaticTM
  • Bellamy is “yes sir” (hell-fucking-yeah he is)
  • Hate crime??? 
  • Monty’s hella badass. 
  • Octavia and papa Miller are Pike’ing out?
  • Ilian’s dying? being executed? by Octavia? papa Miller? both??
  • Kane pulling the Lincoln card 
  • Octavia peaces out

5 steps to getting over the girl who left.

Step 1: Watch sad movies.
Sit on your couch, and click on the first depressing film on Netflix. Get 6 minutes and 38 seconds into it, before you realize why it’s so familiar. Before you realize that this is her favorite movie- the one she told you about. The one she said you two would have to watch together. You’re already almost 7 minutes in, so you can’t make yourself turn it off now. You keep watching, until you get to that line she always quotes. You don’t remember anything after that.

Step 2: Delete her number.
Delete her number, but don’t pretend like you won’t memorize it first. Like you don’t know it by heart, and like your heart doesn’t get caught in your throat every time you hear your phone ring, and like your eyes don’t jump to the caller ID looking for that familiar 908-319-1-800-Why-Did-You-Stop-Loving-Me-?.
And like your heart doesn’t drop back down every time it’s not her. And, trust me, it’s not her- every time.
So don’t pretend like you won’t write her text messages at 3am, hitting the delete button and pretending it says send. Don’t pretend like you won’t call her, even though you know she won’t answer, just to breathe into her voicemail, hang up, and pretend she doesn’t know you’ve been there.

Step 3: Try not to think about her.
Don’t think about her. Don’t think about her hair. Her hair like cinnamon and fallen red leaves in autumn- that poppy flowers mixed with caramel auburn. Don’t think about her eyes. Her eyes that shine like steel grey wind chimes. Her eyes that used to look at you like- used to. Used to. Don’t think about how you used to be. Used to be inseparable. Fingers clasped around each others’. Don’t think about how it’s been 72 days since she last held your hand. Don’t think about how you think your hand must have been keeping count, because you can feel the number etched into the bone of each finger.

Step 4: Find someone new.
Bury yourself in the first person that will have you. Make a home in them. Act like you like it there. Tell yourself its just like her- no, tell yourself its better. That you don’t need her. That these arms are just as warm as hers. Ask what your new home means when they say you don’t love them. You love them. You love her- you mean, them. You love them. They leave you. It doesn’t hurt like when she left you- just feels numb. Just feels empty. Nothing to fill her absence with.

Step 5: Repeat. And hope it works better the second time around.

—  Loosely Based Heartbreak