5 hole

FANS

david bowie fans: 

- gay 
- obsessed with glitter 
- dress like a 70s groupie 
- want to do cocaine


hole fans: 

- fights everyone that says courtney killed kurt 
- a ball of anger 
- smudges their lipstick on purpose 
- sleeps with everyone


nirvana fans: 

- probably depressed 
- buys vintage clothes 
- cries themselves to sleep 
- hates courtney love


amy winehouse fans: 

- cries about their ex 
- wears too much eyeliner 
- sleeps with their best friends crush 
- probably smokes weed


tøp fans: 

- depressed 
- makes weird conspiracies about blurryface 
- really emo
- never stops crying 


lady gaga fans: 

- gay 
- watches rupaul’s drag race 
- “YASS QUEEN SLAY" 
- "LG5 will be soon”


eminem fans: 

- “i hate women”


sky ferreira fans: 

- have an aesthetic tumblr blog 
- smoke 
- “masochism will be released soon" 
- knows deep down that it wont


lana del rey fans:

- have a daddy kink 
- flirts with their older brothers friends 
- pouts 24/7 
- wants to do acid and fuck everyone 


melanie martinez fans: 

- wears babies clothes 
- bitchy af 
- cries about everything 
- fights anyone that says something bad about mel


the beatles fans: 

- lowkey bitchy 
- cry over paul mccartney 
- listens to vinyl 
 - wish they were alive in the 60s


mcr fans: 

- emo 
- think there will be a mcr reunion 
- have black hair 
- wear 20 wristbands


oasis fans: 

- thinks theyre a roadman 
- wears parka coats 
- uses ‘your mum’ as an insult 
- says 'fight me’ to everyone


the doors fans: 

- write poetry 
- read jack kerouac 
- do drugs
- love boys with beards


marina + the diamonds fans: 

- that FROOT is familiar! 
- electra heart is the best era 
- calls themselves a heartbreaker 
- has never had a bf


halsey fans: 

- vegan 
- wears foundation darker than their face 
- has an aesthetic blog 
- probably sad


miley cyrus fans: 

- smokes weed everyday 
- hannah montana is dead ! 
- literally wont shutup about weed 
- weed weed weed weed


rihanna fans: 

- ready to fight a bitch anytime 
- never stops twerking 
- dont fuck with them 
- wears leather bras


the smiths fans: 

- "MORRISSEY IS GOD" 
- never leave their room 
- depressed 
- tweets that pic of morrissey holding his tit all day


5sos fans: 

- rats in human form 
- start wars with other fanbases 
- never stop screaming over everything 
-need to shut up


fka twigs fans: 

- probably have a ouija board 
- angelic but deadly 
- always wear black clothes 
- perfect lipstick all the time


drake fans: 

- still not over their ex 
- bitches about their ex’s new gf 
- has fake gucci bags 
- eyeliner so sharp it could kill a bitch


velvet underground fans: 

- only ever wear black 
- smoke cigarettes for the aesthetic 
- love andy warhol 
- probably bisexual


by @francesxox on Twitter.

  • officer: you kids have a good day.
  • yusuke: thank you, sir. we were worried you’d search us and discover Akira’s dubious pain medications and realistic model gun collection.
  • officer: uh, what was that?
  • akira: nothing, sir. just telling dumb jokes. we don’t want to waste time in your, um, busy day of serving the public.
  • yusuke: but don’t you always say the police are nothing but a bunch of insecure high school drop outs that want to use total strangers and a loaded gun to live out their power fantasies because the only thing they were ever any good at was being under qualified at everything except for murdering innocent minorities?
  • akira, sweating: uh, no?
3

Felicity, I trust you. - Oliver

Really? Because that hole in your back says otherwise. - Felicity

Fair enough. - Oliver

That the painkillers talking? - Felicity

I guess Far Cry 5 has joined the elite “games I normally wouldn’t give a shit about but am tempted to buy cause it pisses off angry disenfranchised white dudes” club.

Eight of the strongest female characters

1. She was so strong that our hero, who had always admired her strength, was moved by her murder to find within himself the power to finally defeat the Platinum Wraith.

2. Her physical awesomeness was such that armour would have only hampered her. Since she had solemnly sworn to uphold the rule of law and that included the part on public decency, she always made sure to wear at least a bra and some shorts, even though she could probably have beaten that spider god first time if it hadn’t been for the sticking-in underwire.

3. She was so strong that her only weakness was love. And also generosity. And wistfulness, that was also her only weakness. And maybe anger. But apart from feelings, she was totally as strong as all the other strong people.

4. Actually her strength was feelings. But in a science way. Through the brilliant alchemy of her brain, she was able to show that Einstein’s equations solved perfectly for all quantum universes if corrected for the force of love. And goodness me, wasn’t it fortunate that she found her own capacity for love just as her planet fell towards the black hole?

5. She could punch through a brick wall, leap over a canyon and stink out a hyena den. Unable to secure an advertising contract, she had to fall back on stress-testing superhero armour in a factory to pay the bills.

6. Her strength came entirely from within; from that deep, secret, mysterious and kind of moist place inside her where the moon’s pallid magic weaves its unknowable mystery.

7. She was definitely the strongest at sass and at least in the top ten at flirting. Some of the younger members of the team suspected that she might not have any real hero powers at all, but every time the issue came up she would fire off approximately a mega-bant of sass, leaving them disarmed and gasping.

8. Everyone agreed that she was as strong as ten women; so strong, in fact, that there was no need to even have the other nine women in the team, which was absolutely great, you’ve no idea how helpful that is, because there are only eleven seats on the hero bus and the others have already been promised to men and have you seen the prices of new buses these days?

2

Sinkhole opens in ground in front of Mar-a-Lago

  • Trump might be out of the country right now, but there’s still news coming out of Mar-a-Lago, the Trump-owned Florida resort that’s been dubbed the “winter White House.”
  • A sinkhole opened up directly in front of Mar-a-Lago on Monday, the town of Palm Beach reported.
  • The hole, measuring about four feet by four feet, is located on Southern Boulevard near the resort’s southern entrance. Read more (5/22/17)

mom: why didn’t you clean your room?

me: ‘i fell in a hole’

liam is so adorable. i bet he’s gonna be that source of happiness during intense situations  (づ。◕‿‿◕。)づ

Originally posted by jitamin

taehyung being that annoying guy your friends are friends with so you have to put up with him:

  • first of all, everything about him would annoy you since the very beginning - his overconfidence, his dumb grin, the fact that he has 5 holes in his big ears (who the fuck needs that many), the way he wiggles his eyebrows playfully when he says something only he finds funny, or his stupid deep voice that makes him sound like a man when he’s in fact still a kid, and most importantly his childish remarks and behavior in general
  • with time even his breathing would upset you
  • every time you’d walk into your friends’ house and see him there, you’d get the urge to turn around and leave
  • you were annoyed because he made fun of you from the minute he met you - he was nice to all your other friends, but he just had something personal against you and he’d always tease you about the dumbest things, and it always seemed to affect you, which is why you were mad at yourself more than at him
  • he’d always have something to say about something you were doing
  • “you’re going on a date dressed like that? no wonder you never get laid, you look like a nun, where did you even get that outfit, you went back to the ‘70s?”
  • “of course the guy hasn’t called you, you’re a pain in the ass and you wait for months before putting out, who in their right mind would call!?”
  • “why don’t you accept the fact that you’re a loser like the rest of us and stay here and watch some tv instead of going to this party?”
  • his remarks weren’t that bad, all your friend laughed at them because in your circle of friends, teasing was just the way things were - but you didn’t consider him a friend because he just wasn’t
  • so anything rude coming from him got on your nerves

Keep reading

the signs as 5sos' trademark clothes
  • aries: luke's leather jacket
  • taurus: ashton's pony shirt
  • gemini: calum's bomber jacket
  • cancer: michael's mismateched black and white pants
  • leo: luke's red plaid flannel
  • virgo: calum's denim jacket
  • libra: ashton's bandana
  • scorpio: calum's snapbacks
  • sagittarius: ashton's fedora
  • capricorn: luke's nrivana shirt
  • aquarius: michael's galaxy leggings
  • pisces: every ashton shirt with holes

purequeenoftheimpure  asked:

Hi! I love your work! I have been scrolling through your blog for a while now. May I request a continuation of the headcanon where mc collapses from exhaustion? With Masamune, Kenshin, Mitsuhide, Shigezane and Nobuyuki, please? No pressure, though. You can ignore this request.

Hey~! I’m glad you do *hugs* and I hope you’ll love this one just as much! 


Masamune would entrust Kojuro and Shigezane to take care of the war council. He knew that they were capable of taking care of all the discussions and decisions that would take place and for that, he left to MC’s side. He didn’t hesitate to open the door and rush to her side. “MC, I’m here…” He mumbled softly as he squeezed her hand. “I’m here now..” He kept on mumbling over and over again in hopes of reassuring her that he won’t allow something like this to ever EVER happen to her again.

Kenshin wouldn’t be happy to hear the news, he always had a smile on his face, even in serious conversations, but now, there were only the traces of a grown and concerned lover. “Delicate… just like a flower.” He thought to himself as he left the war council. His eyes kept on moving back and forth as he rushed to her room. The worry was visible on his face, and he didn’t make any attempts to hide it as he sat down by her side, cupping and stroking her cheek in an attempt to check that she’s feeling better now. MC was unconscious for hours, and at last her eyes fluttered open. Kenshin smiled, his sun was finally up, and the words left his lips before he could stop them, “Strong… just like a mountain.”

Mitsuhide would stand up immediately, he knew that he had an important role during the war council but no one could deliver their thoughts more clearly than Nobunaga himself. Taking permission to leave, he left and rushed to be by his lover’s side. He opened the door and glanced at her face, she didn’t only seem tired but… she also seems to have caught a fever. MC’s face was pale and her cheeks were red. “Always working hard,” He sighed softly as he held her hand, “just like someone I know.” 

Shigezane’s eyes widened when he heard the news. MC? His doll collapsed?! He couldn’t believe the news. He stood up and bowed lightly before leaving the room. MC was with him before the war council started and she was fine. Wait, was she acting fine? He cursed himself as soon as he realized that. MC wasn’t fine and he left her side, “Doll, you can curse me all you want when you’re up but please be fine.” He whispered over and over again before entering the room. The doctor was there and so was MC. She was laid down on the futon and a sigh escaped his lips. He then sat down by her side for a few minutes listening to the doctor before leaning down to breath in her scent. 

Nobuyuki always seemed calm and composed, but as soon as the news reached his ears his worry started to show. Masayuki, his father, turned to him and softly asked him to leave and be by her side. Nobuyuki nodded and bowed before leaving the war council and hurrying to MC’s room. He never felt the need to be by her side more than now. “MC… I promise to take care of you.” He whispered softly as he entered the room. His eyes slowly fell to her small figure curled up in bed. He saw how exhausted she is and he could sense the regret climbing up his body for leaving her side. He quietly went over to her and pulled the blanket over her tired body, while making sure to stay there by her side all day long. 

A Random PSA On The Gei of Geisha - Part 1

The questions surrounding what arts that maiko and geiko practice comes up regularly, and instead of just posting them onto one of the tabs I’d rather lay it out in a post here first.  

The “Gei” (芸) in Geisha(芸者)/Geiko(芸妓)/Geigi(芸妓) means “Art” and there are many branches and types of art that one can master. For this part we’ll be looking at the direct performing arts that everyone knows the geisha are renowned for: music and dance.


Dance - Mai (舞)
All traditional Japanese dance styles have their roots in Shinto ceremonies that date back at least two millennia. There are two main styles to traditional dance practiced today:

-Noh (能): Originally arrived in Japan from China in the 8th century and developed into the style we know today in the 13th century by Kan’ami (assisted by his son Zeami). Derived from the classical court style dances, it features small, precise movements to tell a story. It can be seen as “boring” or “obscure” if you’re not sure what to look for as you need to understand the movements to appreciate them to the fullest. This isn’t to say that it isn’t beautiful to behold without prior knowledge as it is quite enchanting! Gion Kobu’s Inoue school is part of the Noh tradition. 

-Kabuki (歌舞伎): Derived directly from Shinto ceremonies, it was created in 1603 by Izumo No Okuni, a shrine priestess who created her own style of dance and performed it on the dry riverbed of the Kamo River. She became so famous that she was invited to perform in front of the emperor! After seeing how popular the style of dance had become rival dance groups sprung up around her and established the kabuki that we know today. The style is known for its dramatic and often “wild” movements that are meant to be appreciated by the common people. Pontocho’s Onoe, Miyagawa Cho’s Wakayagi, Kamishichiken’s Hanayagi, and Gion Higashi’s Fujima schools are part of the Kabuki tradition.


Music - Raku (楽)
What would dance be without music? Music, like dance, can be broken down into two types: voice/song and instruments.

Singing - Uta (歌): Maiko and geiko learn traditional ballads that are performed alongside dance. There are two types: Kouta (小唄) which means “short songs/ballads” and Nagauta (長唄) which means “long songs/ballad.” They are learned by listening to an instructor and then repeating and/or transcribing the words and melody together. There’s no “set” way of reading or learning a song like there is for Western music, so it takes a large amount of practice to perform any uta properly (although there are a few methods that do exist).

Instruments - Gakki (楽器)
There are many instruments practiced in the karyukai, but I’ll only go over the most common ones that are seen and heard on a regular basis.

-Shamisen (三味線): A three stringed instrument that is played with a plectrum. It is the most common instrument in the karyukai as it developed as an instrument that the common people used. Most uta were created to be played with a shamisen. It resembles a simplified guitar and is played in a similar fashion.

-Tsuzumi (鼓): The all encompassing word for drums, but specifically dual sided drums that are roped together. There are three main types learned by maiko and geiko:

-Kotsuzumi (小鼓): Literally “Small Drum,” or sometimes known as the “regular” tsuzumi, it is held onto one’s shoulder and played by striking the drum with the free hand. 

-Ōtsuzumi (大鼓): Literally “Large Drum,” it is a larger size of the tsuzumi and features one end that is larger than the other. It produces a much deeper sound when struck.

-Taiko (太鼓): Literally “Great Drum,” they’re not the gigantic ones that are often seen at summer festivals, but rather closer in size to an otsuzumi. The taiko sits on a stand while the musician strikes it with rods known as bachi (桴). It is the closest equivalent to Western style drums.

-Fue (笛): The all encompassing word for flute, which in traditional Japanese style is usually made from bamboo. There are two types of fue that include:

-Shakuhachi (尺八): The high pitched iconic flute that is actually rare in the karyukai, it features 5 holes (4 on top and 1 underneath). Its sound is often described as “haunting” as it gently pierces through silence to deliver melodies full of both happiness and sadness.

-Shinobue (篠笛)/Yokobue (横笛): Flutes that are much closer to Western ones, but are still made from wood. It features 7 holes that allows it to play more notes than the shakuhachi. This type is often played with the end resting on the musician’s shoulder.

-Koto (事): A 13 stringed instrument that’s considered a type of lute although it plays closer to that of a harp. Due to its size it lays flat on the floor and the musician plucks the strings individually to produce sound. Those who are new to the koto often wear metal guards on their fingers to keep the strings from slicing into their skin until their hands have developed enough to withstand the pressure. 

-Kokyū (胡弓): Taught exclusively in Miyagawa Cho as it was once considered an instrument of the oiran, a kokyū is a smaller version of the shamisen that’s played upright with a bow instead of a plectrum.