This was requested from anon a billion years ago. I’m sorry it took so long - part 2 will be in Robbie’s point of view. hope it’s not suckish
Rerun - Part 1
Y/N’s point of view
Every time Ben & Jerry’s hits my tongue, it always tastes bitter sweet. This time is no different. I swallow the ice cream and with it sharp fragments of heartbreak; the bits and pieces of lingering disappointment stick halfway down my throat. This won’t do. I shove more ice cream in my mouth, hoping it can push down the annoying lump in my throat that just won’t go away but it’s no use, so I let the tears fall from my eyes, silently chastising myself for allowing a guy to break me down. I can feel Robbie’s eyes on me from the other end of the sofa. At this point in our friendship it shouldn’t bother me in the slightest that he’s seeing me like this… again. But it does. The very fact that he even brought the ice cream over this time and got my flavor right, is humiliating. I wipe my nose on the sleeve of my enormous sweater before scooping up another mouthful. I’m halfway through my pint and I still feel like shit. I can feel another wave of sobs rolling over me and I refuse to look up from the little container on my lap. Despite my best efforts, a small whimper manages to escape my lips and the floodgates open. Not again. I’m mortified.
I hear Robbie sigh and get up from the end of the sofa and I grip my container tighter, trying to get a hold of myself. I’m sure this is the last thing he wanted to contend with on a Friday night. Robbie’s cologne reaches me before he does and I will myself to breathe in deeply as he kneels on the rug in front of me.
“Cake batter not cutting it?” the tenderness in his voice is enough to thaw me out. I don’t trust myself to open my mouth to say anything so I just shake my head no, avoiding his face. I don’t want to see the pity. I’m a pity party.
“Here,” Robbie scoops up some of his ice cream and holds up his spoon to my mouth “maybe some Hazed and Confused will help” I can hear the grin in his voice and I have to laugh despite myself. Reluctantly, I bend my head down and let Robbie feed me.
“Good?” Robbie asks as he pulls the spoon from my mouth. I finally look down at him and he gives me a small smile. I shake my head no again. This isn’t good. I hate hazelnut. But I don’t tell him that. Instead, I start to cry again.
“Hey, come on. I hate seeing you so upset.” I feel Robbie sweep his thumb across my wet cheek and cup the side of my face, coaxing me to look at him again. “This isn’t just about him, is it?” he asks softly. Shit, I’ve been found out already. I cast my eyes downward and hold my breath. I can’t have this discussion with Robbie right now.
The truth is my breakup with Darren was not the only culprit of my current state. Yes, he hurt me and no, I didn’t deserve it. I really liked him. I was sure that he would be the one that would finally make me move past Robbie.
Yes, the very same Robbie kneeling in front of me right now, spoon-feeding me and being the exemplary best friend. The very same Robbie that had told me ‘no sorry, he didn’t like me like that’ when I foolishly confessed my feelings for him after one too many rum and coke’s at his birthday party in junior year. I managed to blame my outburst the next day on my inebriated condition, and I played the part well. No one was the wiser, not even Robbie. We’re still the best of friends. And it’s hell. I’ve been trying ever since to come to my senses, almost succeeding… almost. But he makes it so hard.
“No more crying, please” Robbie whispers in my ear, his warm breath tickles my skin and I shiver slightly. I hate loving him.
I feel his lips press against one of my eyelids and my throat constricts. He’s the sweetest type of torture and my despair feels endless. Robbie was the first one to break me, my first Ben & Jerry’s.
My brain decides at this particular moment that it hates ice cream.
“Can we grab some burgers?” I ask, straightening myself up on my sofa, pulling away from Robbie’s hold on my face. Robbie’s mouth breaks out into a full smile at the mention of burgers. “5 Guys it is!” He gets up from the floor and kisses my forehead quickly.
I need to put myself back together again once and for all, i decide. The fastest way i can think of to do this is getting back with Darren.. asap.