Saw a man refusing to let his pregnant wife off the porch because he “saw a rat the size of a dog and I will NOT let it bite you, please go back inside darling”. Made me wonder how protective the Maheswaran’s were of their baby.
i. When they break your heart, don’t blame yourself. Some people are not right for each other. That does not make them better or worse than you. I am so sorry they caused you pain.
ii. Stitch your heart back together with love, not hatred. Never stop believing in love. Never stop believing that there is love in everything. Never stop loving.
iii. They may have stabbed you in the heart, but your heart is still beating. That is amazing. People will not tell you you are strong as much as you deserve to be told it, but I will. Never forget that you are a warrior.
iv. There are songs that will tell you it is okay to harbor anger for the rest of your life. There are songs that will tell you to stick both of your middle fingers up to everyone who makes mistakes that negatively impact you. Turn off the radio.
v. Believe in second chances. Believe in third chances. Believe in all of the chances in the entire world. But never back down. Tell people to screw themselves when they deserve it. Tell them you are not a damn doormat. Then forgive them.
vi. Don’t be afraid to let go of anything less than you deserve. This includes feelings. Leave anyone who is not positively benefiting you. That does not mean you have to hate them.
vii. Remember that there are people who hurt as much as you do. Everyone is fighting battles against the world, and more importantly, battles against themselves. The one who broke your heart is fighting their own battles. They may seem happier than you right now, but they are not always happy. You affected them more than your damaged self-confidence will let you believe.
viii. Believe people are good at heart. Believe in the good in the world. Remember the good times.
ix. When they break your heart, don’t blame yourself.
If you click around on YouTube long enough, you’ll stumble across a weirdly specific genre of videos with absurdly high view counts. Like this one, which opens with a crudely rendered Spider-Man standing atop a building while a woman recites “Itsy-Bitsy Spider” over and over and over.
Keep watching the video, and you’ll soon feel like you’ve fallen out of the world and right into some strange, Dadaist nightmare. Feast your eyes on Spider-Man seducing Lightning McQueen before taking him out for a spin around town.
It appears the video was made using a GTA IV mod, but the way all the pieces are put together is unnerving, to say the least. It’s more than the fact that the walking animation they used for Spider-Man is clearly a female one, or the unblinking presence of the Lightning McQueen car, or that Spider-Man’s main mission in the video is to go shit his tights in a Cluckin’ Bell restaurant with that sing-song nursery rhyme playing the whole time.
But let’s not stop there – we’ve come so far. Here’s the Hulk performing an exotic dance for Spider-Man, Batman, and Superman to the tune of “Do You Know The Muffin Man,” before he realizes the madness of the situation and throws a couple of Cars characters off a roof, because why the shit not:
And there are so very many of these freaking things, each one an orgy of infantile earworms and copyright violations.