The bunker was eerily quiet. Too quiet. The bunker had never been this quiet. Dean never like the quiet before. Sam watched the hollow figure of his brother walk around aimlessly around the bunker, a bottle of Jack in his hand, and the other running through his hair. HIs chest heaved heavily, like he carried all the burden of the world on his shoulders. And in a way he was.
It was the break of dawn when Dean mumbled something about going for a drive. Sam frowned, thinking about the amount of alcohol he had consumed throughout the day, but he realized that the bottle in his brother’s hand was the same one was the one he saw him holding since yesterday. He took little sips here and there, but he didn’t even finish one bottle. Before Sam could even blink his brother had disappeared, leaving the bunker.
Dean drove aimlessly around, appreciating the endless roads. His mind was entirely on Y/N, and how much she had suffered in such a short period of time. He thought about the idea that you don’t know what you have until it’s gone, and sighed. He always thought he appreciated everything he was given enough. Being a hunter was a tough job, and it made them appreciate the little things in life even more. Clearly, he had forgotten how to. Dean thought about all the women in his life- specifically, Lisa. He thought about how much he had loved her, and how easy it was to love her, and to fit into her apple-pie life. He wondered how or why it was so hard for him to do the same with Y/N. How could he have cheated on her? What in the world had driven him to cheat on her was beyond him, but he needed to know. He needed divulge into this part of him, so he can ask for forgiveness properly. It was then that Dean began to analyze their relationship.
Sam watched his brother through the crack of his opened door. He was kneeling over the bed, head in his hands.
Cas was there in a heartbeat, both of them watching Dean Winchester- the man who had defeated darkness, stopped the apocalypse, and claim to have never believed in God, pray. Sam pulled the angel away from his room, and led them to the kitchen.
“Dean is praying,” Cas said plainly. “He’s never prayed to anyone, but me.”
“Yea.” Sam nodded, letting out a sigh. His heart was breaking for his brother and best friend. “They’re going through the unimaginable.”
Dean walked in the kitchen, a hand running over his face. “I’m going to talk to her,” he said gruffly. His voice had not been used in a long time. He stared at Sam, and it was only then that he realized his older brother was asking for permission to talk to her.
“You should leave the door open,” Sam suggested, knowing it was enough of an answer for his brother.
He nodded, making his way to your room, and knocking on it. If he noticed Sam following him, he didn’t say anything. “Y/N, it’s Dean. I’m coming in.” He left the door ajar, just like Sam suggested, and made his way to the side of the bed, sitting on the chair that Sam usually sits in when he tried talking to her. He sighed, running his hand over his face, just watching her stare at the ceiling, no emotions on her face whatsoever. There was a few minutes of silence, none of them knowing quite what to say. Dean took in a deep breath, finally saying the words he wanted to say since he first told her of his infidelity. “I know I don’t deserve you, Y/N, but if you can hear me out, that would be enough.” He took in a shaky breath, tears rolling down his face. “If I could spare our baby’s life. If I could trade your sister’s life for mine. They’d be here right now, and you would smile, and that would be enough.” He tried putting a hand on top of hers, feeling her flinch at his touch, and he quickly retracted his hand back. “I won’t pretend to know the challenges you’re facing,” he whispered, repeating her words to him when they had first met. “I know there’s no replacing what you’ve lost, and you need time. But I’m not afraid,” he choked on his tears, taking a deep breath before continuing. “But I’m not afraid. I know you. You’re my better half- so much more stronger than me. I know you can get through this- it’ll take some time, but just know that I will never leave you. Please, just let me stay by your side. That would be enough.” He finished his speech with a sob, rubbing his dark circles with the palm of his hands. “I’m not going to give up on you, Y/N. I’ll be here. I love you.”
Here is the first collection of border patterns, from manuscript Þjms 1105, attributed to Ragnheiður Jónsdóttir, the wife of the bishop from Hólar (one of the two archdiocese in Iceland). The manuscript dates from the 17th century.
The finished piece is 15″ x 26″, stitched on a fat quarter of 36-count Zweigart linen. The DMC colors are 347 (dark red), 351 (peach), 310 (black), 3799 (dark gray), and 535 (medium gray).