So, I’ve posted about this a bit before, but remember that AU where Baz and Simon meet again when they’re 32 on a Singles tour of Magickal Britain? Yeah, this is that.
Post- humdrum, Simon doesn’t have magic. Oneshot. V fluffy. Fluff x 10000
They were forced to do it, but they never thought it would end up like this
Penny talked me into this. I would have never, in a million years gone here on my own, but she was relentless.
“Simon, it’s nearly Valentines Day, and you need to get out of the house!”
She was just as persuasive over Skype as in person, though if she hadn’t been in America, she probably would’ve dragged me to the bus stop herself.
She did have a point though. I had tried to make something happen with Agatha after Watford, but things hadn’t worked out. She had run off to America. Just like everyone else.
I’m really not that bitter about all that. Micah and Penny’s kids are adorable (and brilliant) and I visit all the time. I even talk to Agatha sometimes. But, all the other relationships I’ve tried have fizzled out, so now I’m here, at 32, onValentine’s Day on a Singles Tour of Magickal Britain. Typical.
I feel a little out of place in the crowd, surrounded by magic. I lost mine at the end of 8th year, in the process of defeating the humdrum. Being a hero isn’t all fun and games. I mill around, looking for people I know. Then, I see him. His head peaks out above the crowd. He always was so goddamned tall.
It’s Baz, the vampire, my former roommate, the guy who made my life hell for 8 years. I walk toward him, not knowing what I’m going to do. I might punch him. We aren’t roommates anymore, and I don’t have a school to get expelled from. Mostly, though, I want to know where he’s been. I’d assumed he’d gotten himself a pretty little wife from one of the Old Families and had a bunch of vampire children. But, here he is, at this bus stop wearing – sweet Merlin, he’s wearing jeans.
Fiona had made me go to this stupid thing. “Meet a bloke, have some fun Basil.”
Yeah, because I’m sure I’m going have the time of my bloody life.
I walk around for a bit, looking through the pamphlet, and then I see him. Well, I don’t just see him. I see him and smell him and hear him and feel him all at the same time. Simon fucking Snow.
He’s walking - no - running towards me, his face flushed and intense. Of course he would be here. Of course.
I consider ignoring him, but that would honestly be impossible. Of all the things I could do to Simon Snow, ignore him is not one of them. I turn, putting on my old mask of aloofness and distaste.
All of a sudden, he’s right there, invading my personal space. We’re inches apart, and he looks so confused. Is he deciding whether or not to hit me? His eyes fall to my lips. We’re so close, I could… I hate this. He makes me feel like I’m 18 again and trying my best not to kiss him or kill him and I hate it. I hate being a part of his story. I hate how much I love him, even after all these years. I hate it.
“Baz, what are you doing here?”
“I could ask the same of you.”
“Penny put me up to it.”
Of course she did. Before I have time to formulate a witty comeback, however, we’re being ushered gruffly onto the bus. I’m put at the back of the top half, and Snow in the seat right next to me. I start to protest, but the tour guide gives me a death glare. I can feel the magic welling up in her. One more word out of me, and I’m getting spelled to my seat.
I turn, and let myself really look at him. His hair is similarly styled to the last time I saw him, if a little shorter. His skin is tanner, and has the slightest bit of stubble. He still has all his moles, in the exact same places. Crowley, I’m in too deep.
The bus is moving now, and he begins to speak.
“So, Baz, why are you still single?” This man is going to be the death of me. He seems to realize the indelicacy of his statement, though, and backtracks.
“I mean, I’d just assumed you’d have a wife and kids by now.”
I laugh involuntarily at the thought of me with a wife. I had been out to everyone I know since after graduation. Also, heteronormativity at its finest.
“What’s so funny?”
Oh, shit. Am I going to have to tell him?
Snow keeps looking at me intently. He will not stop until he gets an answer. When I imagined coming out to Simon at school, it was usually followed by “And I’m desperately in love with you.” But that wouldn’t do today. So, I just start.
“I was laughing because…well… I’m gay Snow.”
I sit there in shock. The tour guide is saying something, but I don’t hear it.
Baz is gay.
I lived with him for 8 years of my life, I followed him through the catacombs, I watched him sleep for Crowley’s sake, but I didn’t know that? Now that I think of it, I never really imagined him with a girl. But, could I imagine him with a guy? I – I think I did, actually. I must have. Weird.
He’s staring at me, and I have to respond.
Nice. Perfect answer. I am such a fucking idiot.
Baz must realize the awkwardness of the silence, so he talks instead.
“So, why don’t you have a wife? I thought you and Wellbelove were locked and loaded.”
“I dunno, things just, never really worked out.”
Why am I doing this? Why am I being so goddamned civil? We’re having a normal(ish) conversation. We never did that, in all our years at Watford. But, we’re not at Watford anymore.
I look at Baz. He’s still got those insane cheekbones, and that long, silky black hair. He’s still fucking perfect.
“So, I guess we’re just kind of… alone together, right?”
My 15-year-old self is screaming at me now. Seriously though, “Alone together”? Is he trying to kill me? This is going to set my life back 10 years. I’m never going to be over Simon bloody Snow. Well, I might as well enjoy his presence while I can. I smile.
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
We sit on the bus as the tour guide tells us about the Massacre of Warlocks Three in the adjacent park. How romantic.
“So” Simon asks, “What have you been doing after graduation?”
Small talk with Simon Snow. This is… different
“I went to Uni and worked at Starbucks for a while, but now I teach violin.”
He smiles. Simon Snow smiles at me.
“I teach too! I’m actually a counselor at a local public school. I get to help kids, which is really great.”
He’s obviously very passionate about his work. I love him so much. I know it’s pathetic, but I don’t care. Even without his magic, his company is still intoxicating. I can’t help but smile.
Baz is smiling. Not sarcastically, or out of spite. He’s just smiling because he’s happy. I like Baz being happy. I look into his eyes. They’re stormy grey, like the ocean on a cloudy day, and just as deep. He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear. He looks so cute when he smiles.
Before I can process that thought, or act on it, the bus comes to a screeching halt. The driver calls out: “Squirrel! Sorry!”
The shock gets me back to my senses. I’m on a pathetic singles tour with Baz, my former nemesis.
Who you just thought was cute.
I look over at him. He looks back, seemingly remembering I was there, and asks
“Are you okay?”
I smile again.
“Yeah, I’m fine”
We sit there, looking at each other for a moment. He’s wearing a tight sweater, with a scooped neckline. I can see his neck and a sliver of his chest. I don’t know why, but it makes me blush. Then, I remember.
He’s looking at my chest, seemingly spacing out. His curls fall over his face, begging me to run my fingers through them.
Then, all of a sudden, Snow’s eyes get wide, and he turns bright red.
He looks at me, and then turns away, staring resolutely out the window. What was that? I reach over and touch his shoulder, and he jumps, scooting slightly away.
What the fuck is going on?
I am able to imagine Baz with a guy. Not only that, but I have, multiple times over the course of my stay at Watford. And that guy was me.
I’m freaking out. Memories are running through my head. Had I really made a list of all the things… oh, I had. I had. I feel Baz touch my shoulder.
Really not the best time right now!!
I get closer to the window. I’m hyperventilating now. How had I not remembered all of this earlier? I spend most of my time reminiscing about Watford, so how had this not come up? Wanting to kiss your vampire roommate seems pretty important.
“Hey, are you okay?”
I have to turn around, or he’ll think something’s up. Oh God, I feel like a teenager again, so vulnerable and self-conscious Stay cool. Be cool.
He looks so worried. His eyes are large and full of compassion. He is so worried about me. Why is he so worried about me? I have to say something.
“I’m… I’m fine.”
Baz still looks concerned.
“Are you sure?”
He grabs my hand. I gasp, and look up at him.
The contact is electric. His skin is so warm. He is so warm and everything is so cold and I need him. He’s looking at me with those absurdly blue eyes, and I’m falling. I’ve gone too far. I have to restrain myself but I can’t because he’s right there and I’m falling. I feel like I’m 18 again and the world is on fire.
I haven’t felt magic in almost 15 years, but this is pretty goddamned close. I look at Baz’s lips. Why is he so fucking perfect?
The tour is going to be over soon. This might be my last chance. I should kiss him. I should kiss him and get it over with and move on. I should kiss him and get this out of my system. But then, he kisses me.
We’re on a bus full of people, but I don’t really care. I just care about the taste of Baz’s lips. Sugar and mint and longing, just in case you were wondering.
Simon Snow is kissing me and nothing makes sense and the world is on fire. I pull back, breathing heavily. He’s looking at me, seemingly as astonished as I am. The whole top deck of the bus has turned around to stare at us. The tour guide it silent. Someone starts clapping. A couple more join in. The first floor must be so fucking confused.
Simon leans in and whispers, “How long have you wanted to do that?”
“20 years, give or take.”
“Me too… I think.”
He collapses into me, and I rest my chin on his head.
The tour guide comes on the intercom
“Another successful match made by Signature Magikal Singles Tours.”
It’s the end of Freddy’s career, and what a career he had! Massive respect for this gentleman and his accomplishments. Here he is in Portugal about to get tubed. I never had the opportunity to meet Freddy but I still hope I do. Such an iconic man.
Wishing Freddy the best in this new stage of his life! Legend! Thank you, Freddy!