cry//kim jonghyun

30 day writing challenge
007 : cry
kim jonghyun // 590 words
a/n : i dedicate this to my little sunspot squishyfeelsprincess bc she deserves the world and more ;u; ily bby (it’s pure fluff/crack btw)

Originally posted by dearmyfairyboy

It’s never something you plan to do, torn between buying Reese’s or Hershey’s Kisses, in the middle of a department store as wave after wave of emotion blanches through you, leaving you with a quivering lip and contact lenses threatening to shift about your eyes.

“Fuck.” You mumble, settling for both with a huff, tossing them into your basket and continuing on your way.

You don’t mean to act this way, but you’re tired, exhausted and you have to do this at least once a month if you don’t want to snap.

“Excuse me.” He says, hand on your arm.

It’s pretty dramatic, the swoop of your head, lashes lifting to reveal irises blurred by tears, and it’s also quite theatrical, the part of his lips as he rushes, hushes, trying to tell you something.

“You’re stepping on my foot.” He finally squeaks out, eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets.


“Sorry again.” Kicking a pebble, you sniffle pitifully as the man, who you now know as Jonghyun, shakes his head vigorously.

“It’s really okay! My shoes are thick, so I’m all good! I-” He stops.

“I’m more worried about why you’re still crying, honestly.” Looming nearer and nearer, his face falls as your eyes glaze over again.

“It’s fine. I don’t-there’s no particular reason.”

So used to hiding things, you can’t bring yourself to tell him out of habit, as prominent as biting your nails, as festered as a wound left band-aided for too long.

“There must be something.” He responds, and you’re becoming more and more aware of the fact that he’s practically a human heater, giving off wavelengths of pure thermal energy while he sends that wounded puppy expression your way.

“There are lots of somethings, but some things are better left unsaid, you know?” You say, and he nods like he understands. You pale upon realizing what just came out of your mouth.

Fuck, that sounded like something out of a teen romance, I’m sorry.”

Twinkling, glimmering, sparkling, Jonghyun cocks his head and raises and eyebrow.

“You’re a weird one.” If he hadn’t smiled afterward, you’d probably have started sobbing again.


First dates are supposed to be complicated, so you choose to not label your first outside-of-the-department-store meeting with him.

Helping the guy with his lyric-writing shouldn’t be too hard, right?

Fucking wrong; you happen to know asking someone to co-write is the deal-maker, or breaker in some cases.

“So what do you think?”

His pen taps one phrase in particularly, and his eyebrows are arched and focused, an action that nearly has you throw off guard.


“It depends; are you going for the more languid-lovemaking vibe, or an in-your-face sexual shabang?”

Somber, he ponders for a second, chewing the top of his pen.

“Little bit of both.”

Getting your game on, you successfully formulate a line he more than adores, and thus, earn yourself a spot in his heart.

Or, you know, the motive behind this scenario may have been a product of your paranoid nature.

“I didn’t expect anything less than perfect from you.” He teases, opening his arms for a hug, pouting when you don’t hurry into it.

“You don’t have to be so stiff. I’m not gonna eat you.”

Your eyes widen, and he smirks.

“Actually, I just might.” There’s a glint in his eyes you’re not sure you enjoy.

He might have meant it in a playful way, but no matter the intention, Kim Jonghyun sinks his teeth into your earlobe while he growls, and you nearly weep.

Happy first day of March, everybody!

I’m trying out this minimalism challenge that I’ve seen floating around tumblr, but I’ve made a couple of changes to the original to add more of the ones that will give me real difficulty (Leave today unplanned). I know it’s not really a school- or study-related thing, but I know a lot of studyblrs do self-care things and this is definitely something I need!

So, the first day is no social media. I queued this post to post today, and after this I won’t be on Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, etc. etc. I’m not sure yet if I think of tumblr as social media (I know it probably is) so I guess we’ll see.

Let me know if anyone else is doing this! And may the new month bring amazing things.

30 day challenge - Unfuck Your Life

Hey lovelies. So yesterday, as I was just being my scroll-y little self, I came across this post  - and figured that was a goddamn good idea.

BUT. But my goals weren’t the same (they would’ve been fun, but not really what I need right now), and as such I’d need to adapt most of the items. 

Being also my lazy self, I just decided to start a new list from scratch. Feel free to use it, abuse it, do it, share it. But if you do start it, I’d love it if you told me how it works out for you! Tag me, PM me, I’m yours to do as you please.

Having said that, this is based off that post (hence the credit), but I’m starting my own 30 day challenge to UNFUCK MY LIFE.


Me neither.

(You know nothing, Jon Snow.)

Here we go.

  1. Get a journal. Open it. Write. Be it a line. Just your name. A sentence. A quote. Be it five pages and keep going. Doodle. Hate your hadwriting and then smile because it’s perfect for you.
  2. Make a study plan. A realistic study plan. Print it. Complete it.
  3. Don’t just sit around studying in your pajamas. I know it’s comfy, but get up, get dressed, shine that fucking awesomeness.
  4. Clean your room (Yes, even the pile of clothes hidden in the closet. And under the bed. And the ones forgotten in the bathroom.)
  5. Call old friends. Just say hi. Go from there.
  6. Go to bed early. Count sheep to fall asleep.
  7. Get up early too. Spring from bed and don’t look back.
  8. Go for a walk, with company if possible. Your Ipod counts too.
  9. Go to the library. Check out books you’ll like. Check out some you won’t either. Read them all.
  10. Watch the news. Talk about them. Discuss them. Accept different points of view.
  11. Cut your hair. Buy a new pair of shoes. Of pants. Eyeliner. Paint your nails. Look in the mirror and go “yeeeeeah, I’d hit that”. Even if you stay at home all day.
  12. Compliment your mom. Hug your dad. Thank your grandparents. Blow a kiss to your sister. Ruffle your brother’s hair. Squeeze your dog and rub his belly.
  13. Breathe. In. Out.
  14. Go out. Be happy. Show off your legs even if they’re short. Even if you have cellullite. Even if that means wearing a pair of tights because it’s cold out. Flip your hair and smile.
  15. Go out. Drive. Be scared. 
  16. Choose your outfit the day before. Even if you change your mind in the morning.
  17. Smile. Smile. 
  18. Meet up with your best friend. Be your sarcastic self, they love it.
  19. Update your playlist.
  20. Find a new TV show to watch. Make it a documentary.
  21. Say hello to people.
  22. Go downtown. Take pictures. Panoramic pictures, ugly pictures, blurred pictures, selfies. Don’t erase any. Not just yet.
  23. Go out to get coffee. Drink tea instead.
  24. Wear a skirt to college. Rock those hot boots too.
  25. Buy chewing gum. Offer it around, it’s okay if you’re totally ripped off.
  26. Surprise-visit someone.
  27. Have a meal with your mom.
  28. Go shopping. Don’t buy anything.
  29. Change your profile picture.
  30. Take a shower. Kiss the mirror and dance naked. If it jiggles, it’s because it’s there.
  31. Watch the sunrise. Watch the sunset. Feel small. (bonus)

30 Day Ship Meme
Day 1: What is your current favorite ship?

As of late, I’ve been obsessed with Hiccup x Astrid from How to Train Your Dragon. I really could write a good whopping chapter on why I like this couple, why I think they’re realistic, how they relate to my world, and why I don’t have a problem with Astrid. Instead, I will just satisfy with saying that I like this ship more than any other Hiccup ship.


30 Day Challenge - 6th Day - Your Fav Character Overall


Effy. Why her? Well, I’ll explain:

Unfortunately, I’m too much like her. With two differences: she’s stronger than me and she is pretty.

My parents discuss a lot. Like since ever… Since I can remember. IT make me weak because all i wanted was a close family. & now my family is broken. I have that kind of strange conection with fire. I’m always burning things and that makes me happy. I feel so alone sometimes. Most of my life. I always felt like that. Alone. Empty. Think about others. i don’t talk much as she in G1. I have a few friends but my paranoia tells me that they don’t love me, and so I end up losing them. Staying alone. always alone. with my paranoia and my panic and my sadness and all my mental disorders. My mom always tries to help me, but I don’t like to expose my feelings. i ending up with them inside me what makes me  feel very badly. Since I was a little girl I see and hear things. that’s why I’m so weird. & it makes me really scared. I’ve had a depression. At two/three years ago. I think I already got over it. Maybe or maybe not. Honestly I’m not sure if I’m okay and happy. All I feel is a huge void. I have many thoughts together which makes me feel confused. I never know if I’m happy, sad, angry… I’m always empty. Effy, you know… She wants to be strong for everyone, but she is so fragile and sensitive. She falls a little everyday. she is broken inside. she just want to act like evrything is fine when everything is just fucked up. And so am I, too. I also fuck everything. Always. I have that strange energy that makes things become a shit when I come or stuff. I feel like shit. I feel useless. I feel empty. I feel like I’m nothing. & Eff always help me to feel better. So, i love her.