2p russia

crookedinsanity  asked:

Really glad you're back!! I love your blog, so I'm really happy! So, here's my ask! How would the 2p allies react to an s/o who is secretly a yangire? Again. Really happy you are back! I feel bad that I haven't said this any earlier!

Thank you love! Glad to be back!

Yangire- A normal person who suddenly becomes violent. (Basically a Yandere, but without the love.)

A little shocked, maybe a bit confused and uncomfortable, but know that they could beat you in a fight so they aren’t scared- 2p America, 2p Canada

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Don’t really care, but if you tried to hurt them then they would become very scared- 2p Russia, 2p France, 2p China

Originally posted by canonspngifs

They are completely and utterly terrified, they don’t know what to do about you- 2p England

Originally posted by sooper-dee-dooper-natural

What They Have on Their Tumblr

2P America: Fandom crap, edgy aesthetics, occasional sports stuff.

2P England: Pastel aesthetics, decorating tips, and baking recipes. Occasionally a pretty knife. He uses it like Pinterest.

2P China: Pretty much anything that makes him laugh when he’s high. It’s pretty boring, actually.

2P Russia: He doesn’t have a tumblr. He hates computers.

2P France: Vague inspirational quotes and pictures of birds.

2P Canada: His blog is pretty inactive, when he does post stuff it’s pictures of trees.

2P Italy: Vaguely suspicious life tips (how to get blood off things, stuff like that).

2P Germany: Memes, cat pictures and videos, memes.

2P Japan: Tattoos.

2P Romano: He’s a fashion blogger. What’d you expect?

2P Prussia: Motivational quotes, mood boards, and cat pictures.

Reader-chan Has Multiple Personalities

“Which of you am I talking to?”: 2p America, 2p Italy

“Oh.. *doesn’t know how to cope with this*”: 2p Canada, 2p France

“(He wants to be there for you but then again feels bad and a bit scared for you) You don’t remember? That’s disappointing…”: 2p England, 2p Russia, 2p Japan, 2p Prussia

“(He enjoys your split personalities but doesn’t take advantage or make fun of them) Taylor was being such a bitch today, you should’ve seen her! Brittney was cool though.”: 2p China, 2p Germany, 2p Romano, 2p Austria

The 2ps as shit my friends (and family[and me]) have said pt.  2
  • 2p America: Listen bucko I've seen more pussy in my 17 years of life than you ever will
  • 2p England: The first time I tried to cook I caught an oven mitt on fire and burned an orange. Don't ask how because I don't know either
  • 2p China: If you can't remember my name you can call me ling-ling or dumpling, I don't care
  • 2p France: I will literally break your finger if it comes any closer to my face
  • 2p Russia: *pouring 4 packets of sugar into a cup of tea* it's 6 in the morning and I went to bed at 4. I have so many regrets
  • 2p Canada: I'm going to slit the tires on my neighbor's car if he doesn't stop coming onto our land I swear to fucking god
  • 2p Italy: *breaks finger after catching a football**completely monotone* it seems that I'm in a bit of a situation. How unfortunate. Now, if you'll excuse me *goes to the nurse crying his eyes out*
  • 2p Germany: Yeah, I can speak German. Eat meine Dick
  • 2p Japan: The only thing darker than my soul is my hair
  • 2p Romano: *in response to 'you should wear a suit to bed'* you're right, I'll look dapper as fuck while I take a napper as fuck
  • 2p Austria: I can play skrillex on my ukulele
  • 2p Prussia: *nearly in tears* she took my flower crown
  • 2p!Russia: (Holding a broken coffee machine) Who broke it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.
  • 2p!Japan: I did. I broke it.
  • 2p!Russia: No. No, you didn’t. Italy?
  • 2p!Italy: Don’t look at me, look at Romano.
  • 2p!Romano: What?! I didn’t break it!
  • 2p!Italy: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?
  • 2p!Romano: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!
  • 2p!Italy: Suspicious.
  • 2p!Romano: No, it’s not!
  • 2p!France: If it matters, probably not but… China was the last one to use it.
  • 2p!China: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!
  • 2p!France: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
  • 2p!China: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that!
  • 2p!Prussia: Let’s not fight, I broke it. Let me pay for it.
  • 2p!Russia: No. Who broke it?
  • 2p!Germany: America’s been awfully quiet…
  • 2p!America: Really?!
  • 2p!Germany: Yeah, really!
  • Everyone: (yelling ensues)
  • 2p!Russia: *inner monologue*(I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. Its was getting a little chummy around here.)
The 2ps in the world meeting
  • 2p Germany: *Having a paper ball fight with 2p America*
  • 2p America: *is winning the paper ball fight*
  • 2p Russia: *is annoyed by everyone*
  • 2p China: Who wants to get stoned with me?
  • 2p England: Everyone calm down, surely we can handle this like adults
  • 2p Romano: I could be doing something productive, like shopping for new outfits, but no…I’m stuck with you guys
  • 2p Prussia: *is hiding under the table*
  • 2p Japan: *sits silently also very annoyed*
  • 2p Austria: *drawing Satanic symbols on the table*
2p! as filty frank gifs

Jason J, Jones/ 2p America:

James Williams/ 2p Canada:

Louis Boneyfoy/ 2p France:

Oliver Kirkland/ 2p England:

Sergei Braninsky/ 2p Russia:

Yang Wang / 2p china:

Siegfried Beilschmidt./ 2p Germany:

Luciano Vargas/ 2p Italy:

Flavio Vargas/ 2p Romano:

Klaus Beilschmidt./ 2p Prussia:

Kuro Honda/ 2p Japan:

Ryszard Edelstein/ 2p Austria:

Santiago Fernández Carriedo/ 2p Spain:

Anastasia Braninsky/ 2p Belarus:

Maryska Braninsky/2p Ukraine:

Julia Héderváry/2p Hungary:

anonymous asked:

What motto would the 2ps have?

Life Mottos

2P!America: “Eat pussy not animals”

2P!China: “Support your local drug dealer”

2P!England: “Treat yourself to cake anytime you like because it’s someone’s birthday somewhere

2P!France: “Do what the fuck keeps you happy”

2P!Russia: “Violence is never the answer, you idiots”

2P!Italy: “Always be the most intelligent person in the room”

2P!Germany: “If no one from the future comes to stop you from doing something then how bad of a decision can it really be”

2P!Japan: “Only owe your loyalty to those whom you never had to question theirs”

2P!Canada: “What doesn’t kill you fucks you up mentally”

2P!Romano: “Life’s too short to wear boring clothes”

2P!Austria: “Find a role model and then become them… but better”

2P!Prussia: “Never be afraid to live your life”

Cinnamon rolls

Looks like a cinnamon roll but can actually kick your ass: 2p England, 2p Romano,

Looks like they can kick your ass is actually a cinnamon roll: 2p Germany, 2p America, 2p Canada,
2p Russia

Looks like a cinnamon roll and is a cinnamon roll: 2p Prussia, 2p China

Looks like they can kick your ass and can kick your ass: 2p France, 2p Italy, 2p Japan

2ps Reactions To S/O Wanting Kids

2p America: “You really want a mini me running around here, huh??” He would laugh about it, but certainly wouldn’t be against it.

2p England: “Oh, poppet! I’d love to, if you want to, but-” He would be all for it, very excited, but also very worried. What if something goes wrong? What if he isn’t the best father? He doubts everything that could happen.

2p China: Cue nervous laughter and a lot of stuttering. As much as he would like kids, he’d find the whole thing to be kind of difficult. He’s not the most consistent person, let alone a consistent father.

2p France: “….” He wouldn’t really want a kid. He feels like he messed up raising Matt, and he doesn’t want to mess up again.

2p Russia: “I see. You really want a child?” He would make sure that it was truly okay with it. He’d be somewhere in the middle, as the idea would put him off for a little bit, but if you give him time he will warm up to the idea of having a child.

2p Canada: “You sure..?” “…Okay.” He’s wanted kids before, but never asked. He wants to prove to himself that he can take care of a child, better than he thought his own father did.

2p Italy: “Oh,bella,I don’t see why not… But why?” He’d be okay with it, but would want a specific reason as to why you wanted to have a child with him.

2p Germany: He’d give you a big hug immediately. “Hey, of course! I mean, they’re basically a little bundle of insomnia, but that’s not so bad!” He’d love to have a child with you, as for him it shows him just how much you do love him.

2p Japan: “Hm…” He wouldn’t decide immediately, not really liking the idea a whole lot. Though he isn’t completely against it, just let him think about it.

2p Romano: Cue dramatic gasp. “Oh bella, of course!!” He’d be all for it, already making up plans for the baby. Name, baby shower, room, whatever; he’ll have it done in no time.

2p Austria: “Oh, darling, of course~, I was wondering when you’d ask~” He has been wanting kids for a while now, as it kind of says to him that now there’s no way that you’d leave him.

2p Prussia: “W-What? Are you sure? I don’t… Think that I’d be the best father, but…” As much as he would love children, he doubts that he’ll be the best he can be for his child, so is mostly just worried.

2p!Hetalia as teachers
  • 2p!America: health/sex ed teacher who makes dick jokes
  • 2p!Canada: industrial tech teacher who literally just rips the fucking wood
  • 2p!France: history teacher that remembers being there
  • 2p!England: teaches the cooking class and is way too kind, never gives anybody detention
  • 2p!China: math teacher who's not good at math
  • 2p!Russia: science teacher that does these crazy ass experiments, it scares his students
  • 2p!Germany: really soothing counselor
  • 2p!Italy: teaches theatre/drama and is too good at it, can be heard from another hallway
  • 2p!Japan: geography teacher who can draw the entire fucking map from memory
  • 2p!Romano: overdramatic art teacher, can passionately yell about a single stroke for the whole class period
2ps trying to cook

Allen D, Jones/ 2p America

James Williams/ 2p Canada

Louis Boneyfoy/ 2p France

Oliver Kirkland/ 2p England

Sergei Braninsky/ 2p Russia

Yang Wang / 2p china

Siegfried Beilschmidt./ 2p Germany

Luciano Vargas/ 2p Italy

Flavio Vargas/ 2p Romano

Klaus Beilschmidt./ 2p Prussia

Kuro Honda/ 2p Japan

Ryszard Edelstein/ 2p Austria

Santiago Fernández Carriedo/ 2p spain

2p’s react to s/o bursting into a room and asks to feel their freshly shaved legs

2p america: HOLY FU- , damn soft as a baby bottom.

2p canada: no I DoNNT WANT TO FEEL YOUR DAMn le- this feels nice.

2p england: Splendid! How did you get them so soft poppet?

2p france: *looks bored* nice. *silently to himself* mon dieu.

2p china: Kittin, any place else I have to feel hmm? ;)

2p russia: Yes very nice, now shoo, i need to work.

2p italy: CHE CASO RAGAZZA WHY THE HELL YOU BURS- mio dio *keeps petting your leg without saying anything*

2p germany: SCHEISSE- ohh. Might wanna wrap those legs around me so we both can enjoy them?

2p japan: *monotone voice* nice.

2p prussia: s-soft as a baby bird.

2p lovino: What cream did you use darling? The new one I bought you?