• Me and Sarah:*eating ice cream*
  • White man in car:hey bud! Do they take credit card here?
  • Me:yeah they do
  • White man:alright thanks! Where you kids from? PAKISTAN?! IRAQ?!
  • Sarah:San Luis Obispo?
  • White man:No No! I mean ORIGINALLY?!
  • Sarah:yeah San Luis Obispo?
  • White man:.... Well alrighty then *drives off offended*

Remember the time a stranger tricked me into going to his apartment and tried to sleep with me?

So you know in the first episode of Degrassi: The Next Generation when Emma goes to a stranger’s hotel room and almost gets attacked..that kind of just happened to me.

All day I was studying at the Starbucks in the hospital four blocks away from my house. At one point in the afternoon I look up from my accounting homework and see this guy on his MacBook across from me just looking at me. I looked embarrassed and smiled awkwardly..I assumed he was looking at me because of my habit of singing along to music when I get in the zone.

Anyways, I asked him if he’d watch my stuff when I went to the chapel to pray. He said sure. A few hours later I asked him to watch my stuff when it was prayer time again. He did. When I got back he struck up a conversation and since I’m polite, I talked with him. He noticed I was studying accounting and told me he took a lot of business classes as an undergrad. I told him accounting is difficult. He told me he still had his old accounting books and notes in his apartment. This was my first mistake. I should’ve known he was a liar because no one keeps their accounting stuff. They burn it when they’re done with the class. 

I start packing up my stuff and he says he should head home too. He asked if I lived close and I said yeah I live a few blocks away. Coincidentally, he did too. So we left together. He told me I should come with him to his building because he wanted to give me his old accounting stuff. Again, I was polite and said sure. We walked to his building which is only a few minutes away from mine. I sit in a chair in the lobby and he told me to just come up. At this point, I was a little creeped out but I knew I could kick his ass if it came down to it. When I got in the elevator with him I messaged Sarah, Hanadi, Rustan, and Amira that if I don’t message them again in an hour it means I’m dead. 

When we were in the elevator he asked where I went to school and if I worked. I lied about what school I went to and my job. He mentions he’s unemployed to which I respond, “Wow, this is a really nice building to live in if you’re unemployed.” That led him to tell me about how it was his Mother’s apartment who recently passed away…and he starts tearing up. We get to his apartment and he tells me to sit on his couch while he looks for his accounting stuff. 

I knew he was crazy when I got in his apartment. He had photo collage posters on his walls that he made himself. There were five of them and they were each for a different anime show. Oh and he had the entire Disney classics collection. He was talking to me about his dead mother from the other room while I sat and waited. He comes out and says he can’t find them. I was like oh cool let me leave. And he says no stay for a bit. I was like um no but he insisted. I was really confused. Then he went over to his liquor cabinet and legit asked me, “What’s your poison?” 

I told him I had to study more so I shouldn’t drink. He insisted and I told him I don’t drink. He said no one will know and finally I said I’m actually a recovering alcoholic..I told him I was 7 months sober. I have no idea why I said that but it worked. He then told me how he never actually graduated from undergrad he dropped out. I don’t think he even took accounting to be honest. He then saw me “admiring” his Disney collection and told me his favorite is Aladdin…that he’s always had a thing for Middle Eastern guys because of the film. Um what the hell does that even mean?

I asked to use the bathroom at this point and he showed me the way. I just stood in his bathroom for a few minutes hiding coming up with a plan. He had a lot of medicine in his bathroom I will say. I’m pretty sure he was crazy. I didn’t know what to do. And me being an idiot I left my phone on his coffee table. I walked out of the bathroom and was thinking of an excuse to leave because nothing had worked earlier..

But when I come out of the bathroom it got even creepier…he turned on music…baby making music. I was in shock. I couldn’t move it was so weird. He sat next to me and was just being so awkward. He told me we should watch a movie and he dims the lights. I just got up and said sorry I need to go right now. And I start heading to the door. He gets up too and tells me he understands I have to get back to studying. He then starts telling me since we live so close we should hang out sometimes. My response was ummmmmmm maybe I really have to go. He was standing in front of the door and told me he’d walk me out. I said I got this and I kind of pushed him out the way and headed to the elevator. I walked out of the building and I legit ran home…in a backpack. It was not a pretty sight. I even took detours because I was afraid he was following me. 

I just don’t understand. I’m going to sound like a girl right now but wow, guys are so creepy. Just because someone is nice and polite to you..does not mean they want to sleep with you. Oh and I’m offended about the whole thing. First off, in what world did he think he could get with me. I’m straight but still, even I know I’m way out of his league. He’s a ginger. Second, what made him think I’d be that easy. I don’t understand. 

Moral of this story is that you should not talk to strangers. You should not be polite. You should not be nice. You should just be a douche to everyone because you will give them the wrong impression and they will try to sleep with you. 

Men are the worst. 

I know Eid isn’t Thanksgiving but I wanted to give a shoutout to some people here I’m thankful for and/or inspired by.  

Ali http://baluchx.tumblr.com/

Sarah http://1000meaninglesswrds.tumblr.com/

Mujib http://mujibb.tumblr.com/

Amira http://cholahijabi.tumblr.com/

Omar http://omiedahomie.tumblr.com/

Hanadi http://morrawr.tumblr.com/

Ainee http://faineemae.tumblr.com/

Rustan http://rsvnr.tumblr.com/