0nlybeingme

Relationships these days aren’t like they used to be. Honestly, i have fallen out of love with the idea of being in love. Most relationships fail. Why? Because no one wants to put the time into making things work anymore. People would rather walk away then solve problems, problems which could easily be solved via communication. Romance is dead. People put so much effort into getting a person and when they have them they no longer find the time to make an effort. Gone are the days of cute coffee shop dates and walks in the park, instead netflix and chill and cocktails take over. People settle for less than they deserve because they don’t want to be alone. People will claim they love you one day and leave you the next. People will be in love with one but dating another, simply because they are scared of admitting their true feelings. People will claim they love you when they are still thinking about the same person over and over again. People are so quick to write “meaningful” posts for their loved ones on instagram or facebook, but how many can say those words face to face. How many of those people would take the time out to write a letter? Not many. “Love” just doesn’t seem genuine anymore. It’s a shame.
—  i don’t believe in love. Not anymore. 
It’s not always the person them self you miss, it’s more the feelings that you associate with them. You get used to them being around, their warmth radiates you. You received good news, you went to them, something bad happened, you’d run to them for comfort. They were the first person to tell you when you were wrong and the first to congratulate you. Yet once they’re gone, you don’t know who to go to, you keep hoping that one day they’ll tell you that they’re proud of you, just like they used to. This isn’t because you want their satisfaction, it’s because you miss making someone proud. You miss hearing someone tell you how well you’re doing and how you’ve come so far, achieved so much. You miss someone believing in you and supporting you. You miss falling into their arms and crying whilst they play with your hair, telling you it will all be okay. You can love a person, but you cannot love them anywhere near as much as you can miss them. Memories are reasons we hold on for so long because we cling to them hoping that one day they’ll happen again. Except life doesn’t work like that, people will let you down and people will move on and the world doesn’t stop for anyone. People will come into and out of your life but those who are meant to be there will stay and they won’t need a reason to. You shouldn’t have to beg someone to stay. You shouldn’t have to change for anyone. Because everyone deserves to be with someone who loves them for who they are. Someone who falls in love with them more and more each day. Someone who would do anything to be their everything. And sometimes the people we fall for just aren’t that ‘someone’, and that’s okay. Just because you love someone, doesn’t mean you should be with them. Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be and that’s okay, one day someone will bring warmth into your life again.
—  A letter I wrote to myself on dealing with a break up. A reminder that feelings change like the seasons and just as spring turns into summer, life will get brighter. I may always love you deep down but I will love again.