0 to 0.99

  • Chekov: Hey, did you get my report on the mission?
  • Kirk: Ah, yeah, I looked it over. Nice work.
  • Chekov: Good. Thanks, dad.
  • Chekov: Why is everyone staring at me?
  • Spock: You just called Captain Kirk “dad”. You said “Thanks, dad.”
  • Chekov: What? No I didn’t. I said “Thanks, man.”
  • Kirk: Do you see me as a father figure, Chekov?
  • Chekov: No! If anything, I see you as a bother figure, because you’re always bothering me!
  • Sulu: Hey! Show your father some respect.
Bets Are A Dish Best Served Cold - Part 1 (Bucky x Reader)

Synopsis - (Sort of) Enemies to Lovers AU Based on Amy and Jake from Brooklyn 99. You and Bucky are two of Brooklyn’s best detectives, however its known throughout the precinct that you two are as good as nemesises as far as petty jabs and insults are concerned. After being partnered up on a case the two of you make a bet to see who can make the most arrests before the end of summer. Both tensions and feelings are riled. Are the two of you destined to be enemies or something else? 

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader 

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of robberies, vandalism and graffiti, petty arguing, Bucky being a smug ass 

Word Count: 2,880

A/N: First and foremost, I dedicate this Fic to @poe-also-bucky because Michelle is awesome and always so kind 💙

So I love Brooklyn 99 and Jake and Amy are one of my OTPs and yesterday whilst washing up the dishes I came up with this idea based on their bet is Season one! This idea was literally nagging me so I just had to write it despite needing to finish and write other fics, This won’t be a majorly long series, maybe only 6 parts? But if you’d like to be tagged, let me know! 


Originally posted by vintagefangirll

“So how’s work life with your temporary partner?” Natasha said, smirking a little as she walked over to your desk holding two cups of coffees.

“Ugh, don’t remind me.” You groaned rubbing your forehead. “Bucky is insufferable.”

“Well, I’ve got to say, you’ve surprised me, I really thought one of you would have killed the other by now.” She chuckled, taking a sip from one of the cups.

It was pretty much known throughout the precinct that you and Bucky couldn’t go more than ten minutes without some snarky remark, petty jab or insults that may or not lead to an argument and you threatening to throw your stapler at his head.

It wasn’t that you hated Bucky, in fact you actually felt a small admiration for the man. He was intelligent and extremely athletic making him a more than capable detective, despite one of his arms being a prosthetic. When you first met him you were actually impressed by his determination and talents. Any fondness you felt for the man then soon dissolved as the two of you were met with a personality clash. 

You would be the last person to admit that both you and Bucky were extremely similar despite the contrast of your personalities. Where he possessed the emotional maturity of a ten year old, discovering playboy magazines for the first time you were prudent and serious - minded. Clint had joked that you were the “mother” of the police force.

When he wasn’t on the field and making arrests, Bucky’s focus plummeted from 10 to zero. It seemed his focus was replaced with the ability to be the most obnoxiously unbearable man in Brooklyn. His locker stunk as though something had died, the same as his desk drawers which just had to be situated next to yours. He was constantly playing around with things on his desk, flicking pen lids and paper clips at you, singing out of key or making references to Tom Cruise movies. 

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anonymous asked:

Are you doing the b99 head canons still? (I'm sorry I saw in in some tags and thought it was a really great idea, but if I'm too late that's ok:)) Cause I'd really like to see someone write some head canons for when Amy's pregnant and her and jake go to get the ultrasound and everyone's just really proud and happy and it's just a nice idea :))) You don't have to though, don't feel pressured if you don't feel like it!!

• Amy looked at every ultrasound clinic in town to find one that had an open slot at a time when nobody would be working. She was determined to make sure she could share this moment with everyone.
• Amy scheduled the ultrasound at 2pm. Jake was afraid he’d be late as usual so he made get there at noon. He was afraid Amy’d be uncomfortable in his smaller car so Terry offered to drive them in his minivan.
• Terry offered to give their child Cagney, Lacey, and Ava’s hand-me-downs. They don’t care if it’s a boy because honestly who cares if a male infant is wearing pink clothing. Jake: “F*** gender roles!” *puts hands on Amy’s belly* “I’m so sorry our baby had to hear that kind of language, but I feel very strongly about this issue”
• Since they showed up so early, they stop at a coffee shop near the clinic. Amy drinks water, and so does Jake. Jake gave up alcohol and caffine while Amy’s pregnant so she won’t be the only one suffering.
• Amy: “Jake, you can order coffee. You’re doing more than enough to help.”
Jake: “You’re about to squeeze a tiny human out of you. I should ask Charles to kick me in the groin as hard as he can while you’re in labor so we’ll be suffering together. The pain you’re going through is worse than anything, even worse than growing up without a dad.”
• Jake gets quiet and starts thinking to himself. Then he starts whimpering, then full on sobbing. Amy panics, asks what’s wrong. Jake chokes out “I always hated my dad for leaving me and mom. I know I’ll never do that to my family. I’ll always be there for my kid.”

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