i know we’re all up in arms about the fyre festival, but as we speak, a hacker going by the name of The Dark Lord has secured season 5 of Orange is the New Black and is now blackmailing Netflix for “a modest ransom” and quite frankly i have never heard anything more hilarious in my life, like honestly, what is this day????
“Look, thank you. Thank you. Knowing you, it… it’s been the best part of my life. And the things that… the things we’ve shared together, they have changed me. You’re my family. I love you. I love all of you. Just please… please, don’t make my last moments be spent watching you die. Just run. Save yourselves.”