...put that in your pipe and smoke it

Tweaker Problems

When your really high and you forget where you put everything. You hit the pipe then walk 5 ft and you some how loose the mother fuckin lighter. Fuck. 30 minutes later you find the lighter and decide to smoke a cigarette, well FUCK-MY-LIFE where are my cigarettes? Holy shit. You spend another hour looking for them BC every drawer you open your ass can’t help but tweak through everything. Your busy doing that and you forget what your even looking for in the first place. So you decide your going to hit the pipe so you can gather your thoughts….but oh wait my stupid ass can’t find the lighter AGAIN.
Fuck I seriously hate how motherfuckin burnt up I can be sometimes.

Stoner witch tips

make sure to cleanse your pipe periodically, especially after smoking w large groups of acquaintances or people with clashing vibes

Name your piece and take care of it, bond with it, and it’ll treat you well.

Charge the salt or rubbing alcohol you use when you clean your pipe. Throw in a couple sprinkles of herbs or essential oils to fit your purposes

Leave your piece sitting out at night and charge it under the full moon, or maybe put a crystal in the bowl overnight, or charge it using gem water

Consider having a personal pipe if you have the money for one, !!especially!! If you use weed as a part of your craft.

Instead of using incense to symbolize air, use a joint.

Use moon water in your bong. Cackle ominously and whisper “bubble bubble toil and trouble” for extra effect. Depending on if/which deities you worship, that might be disrespectful. Charged crystal water is unproblematic as far as I know, but be sure the crystal isn’t going to leave poisonous particles in the water.

Carve sigils into apple pipes. Smoke next to a tree or flowers and have a bonding smoke sesh. Apple pipes are a nice to leave as an offering to a tree or plant you’re trying to bond with, but make sure to ask first to see if the plant is comfortable with that. It could be seen as a sharing of resources and nourishment after a sesh, or a major disrespect ((bc u did just burn another plant for your enjoyment)) bury it near the roots or leave it out for the animals.
be careful with that tho bc the apple will have your magical signature on it.
Enchant your weed using the strain as a guideline if you have that information
Enchant your grinder to purify and filter out your weed, and remember to cleanse it every so often


Down at the Crossroads | 8tracks 

If you’re ever in need of guidance go down to the crossroads at midnight. Bring some tobacco, matches, a loaf of bread and a small bottle of whiskey. Go to the crossroads draw this sigil in the dirt and state your problem. Papa Legba will help.

He usually appears as an old man with a cane wearing a broad brimmed hat and smoking a pipe. He doesn’t need the cane to walk but he carries it with him anyway. A dog happily trots along beside him and then sits at his feet.

Give Papa Legba the tobacco, matches, bread and whiskey but don’t say a word. He’ll probably put them in the pockets of his coat but sometimes he’ll give some of the bread to his dog and add some tobacco to his pipe. Don’t say anything until he asks you what you want.

If he can help you with your problem he will. If he can’t he’ll try to bargain. Don’t take the bargain. Smile. Nod your head and say “I hope you enjoy the tobacco, whiskey and bread” and walk away. Don’t look back. Don’t ever look back.

If you’re smart he’ll smile. If you fall for his trick, temptation or gamble then he’ll smirk. So if you’re ever in need guidance, go down to the crossroads at midnight but make sure you have your wits about you.

Dazai: We’re gonna put your profile on Match.com.

Kunikida: We thought maybe you could meet somebody new.

Ranpo: I’ll tell you what. What if I wore a checkered hat and smoked a pipe?

Ranpo: That’d work.

Dazai: Why would you want a checkered hat and a pipe?

Ranpo: You know, for the Sherlock Holmes look.

Kunikida: Why would you want to look like Sherlock Holmes?

Kunikida: Who are trying to attract, exactly?!?

theclumsiestninja  asked:

Hey, I saw your tags on the bong post. So essentially how bongs work is that you put the weed on top of the little arm that sticks out, and then light it so that it will produce smoke. The smoke travels through the little arm into the bottom of the large pipe, where the smoke filters up through the water (or milk in this case) as bubbles. You then inhale the smoke that rises to the top, and apparently it is easier to smoke than other methods, idk I've never actually tried it :V


Sounds like a lotta trouble why not roll it up and just smoke it like a cig

Please stop underestimating the depth of Emma and Killian’s love

Dear all Once characters,

If you don’t get it by now…

Everyone around Emma and Killian has truly underestimated how they feel about each other, or how deeply for one another their love runs.

Killian snapped out of it when Emma was threatened. Emma wasn’t going to die, he knew that. Nimue said that she couldn’t kill Emma. But that was enough for him to come out of his darkness induced haze.

The people around them certainly underestimated it. And Nimue’s fatal mistake was threatening Emma. 

He sacrificed himself for her, and she’s going to the Underworld to get him back, because him not being there with her is not an option.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

I’ll admit it: I completely forgot that Synths’ bodies can’t change (weight gain or loss). So that is my bad.

The Institute crushes everything I love. I’m gonna stick with my stress-eating!Danse headcanon out of spite. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Father. *double birds*

maybe one day my bones won’t be so heavy
and everything i touch won’t catch fire. maybe
i’ll be able to pull my burning fingers out of the flames
of every good thing i ever knew and maybe
i’ll put them to work mending the open wounds
i left on my own body.
maybe i’ll find relief
from a place that isn’t at the bottom of a glass pipe and
i won’t need to fill my lungs with hot smoke
to feel alive for a few hours.
maybe you’ll call and you’ll be drunk
and you’ll say you didn’t mean it
and i’ll tell you that i hope the bottom of your bottle
tastes just like me.
and i’ll hang up.
and i’ll be free.
—  i hope it tastes just like me.