mollyismusical asked you: 2012-07-31 17:46 So... I was reading tumbled and I agree we need Lady!Puck and Lady!Finn causing mayhem with a very devious Lady!Kurt...
“This’ll be awesome,” Puck giggled.
Fiona scratched the back of her neck anxiously. “I don’t know,” she said hesitantly. “Kate’ll be pissed if she finds out.”
Puck tiptoed down the hallway to Kate’s room and tried the knob tentatively. “Damn,” she said. “Locked.”
“See? We shouldn’t do it,” Fiona said. “Let’s go. We can play Rock Band. I’ll let you have drums this time.”
“No way, bitch, drums suck,” Puck said. She ran a hand through her shaggy pixie cut and scowled. “Dammit. Do you have any bobby pins?”
Fiona tugged anxiously on her short ponytail. “A what?” she said.
“Never mind,” Puck said. She fumbled around in the pocket of her cut-off shorts, dug out a credit card, and wiped it on the hem of her neon blue crop top. “This’ll work fine.”
“Where did you learn that?” Fiona hissed.
“Juvie,” Puck shrugged. The door to Kate’s room clicked open. “Success! Come on, let’s go.”
Puck galloped into Kate’s room with reckless abandon. Fiona followed, glancing around nervously. “Kate will kill us if she figures out we messed with her stuff,” she warned.
“She’s at Warblerette rehearsal with her girlfriend till what, seven?” Puck shrugged. She bumped Kate’s childhood collection of dolls around on their shelf, tweaking them into suggestive positions. “By the time she gets back, we’ll be long gone at soccer practice.”
Fiona sighed heavily and sat down on the edge of Kate’s neatly made bed. “If we get in trouble, I’m blaming you,” she warned.
Puck grinned and sat down at Kate’s little white vanity, rummaging in her pocket. “A little bit of garlic paste in her lip gloss…a little baby powder in her hair dryer…a little Nair in her hair gel…” she smirked.
Fiona bolted upright. “Okay, you cannot do that,” she said. “Kate is obsessed with her hair. If you do that-”
“DEAR DIARY!” a sweet voice bellowed.
Puck froze. “What the hell is that?”
“TODAY I SAT NEXT TO LYLE ZISES IN STUDY HALL. I THINK HE IS THE HOTTEST PIECE OF ASS IN ALL OF MCKINLEY HIGH SCHOOL!”
Fiona frowned. “That sounds like…”
Puck leaped up, knocking off half the bottles from the vanity and racing down the hall. Fiona ran behind her.
“ALL I WANT IS THAT SWEET HUSKY HUNK TO NOTICE ME! BUT NO MATTER HOW AWESOMELY HOT MY REPUTATION IS, HE STILL WON’T PAY ANY ATTENTION TO ME!”
Puck flung the door to Fiona’s room wide open. Kate was jumping up and down on Fiona’s unmade bed in her school uniform with a hot pink diary in her hands, her white knee-highs sliding down her legs and her short gray skirt flipping up, revealing a hint of her light blue ruffled underwear. Blaire sat on Fiona’s messy desk, laughing behind her hand and clearly enjoying the view.
“Hummel!” Puck snarled.
Kate stuck out her tongue and continued to bounce merrily, her long hair sliding free of her red hair ribbon and waving nearly to her waist. “Valentine’s Day is coming up, and I really want him to ask him out!” she read, licking the tip of her finger and turning a page in the diary. “But then again, I’m a twenty-first century bitch! Maybe I’ll just ask him out!”
“I’m going to kill you!” Puck shouted.
“You shouldn’t leave your diary around in your unzipped backpack!” Kate taunted, waving it back and forth. “This is what you get for trying to mess with my makeup!”
“Give me my diary, Hummel!” Puck screamed, and she lunged for her. Kate shrieked and tossed the diary to Blaire, but not before Puck had thrown herself at Kate’s knees and shoved her off the bed.
“Oh my god, don’t kill my sister!” Fiona shrieked. “Dad will kill us!”
Kate let out a high-pitched scream and rolled onto Puck, scratching at her like a little wildcat. Puck grabbed a handful of Kate’s long hair and gave a vicious tug.
Blaire edged away from the brawl. “Here they go again,” she sighed. “Who do you think will cry first?”
“Kate, but Puck’ll bleed first,” Fiona said. “I just hope they don’t break anything this time.”
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine Rating: PG. Summary: Kurt visits Best Buy to make a quick purchase but gets more than he bargained for in the form of an adorable, over eager shop assistant. AKA enthusiastic nerd!blaine. A/N: All credit goes to daydreamcharm whose idea inspired me to write this *u* the title is atrocious, read into what you will.
Kurt had only entered the store to make a quick purchase – he was going to swoop in, collect a gift voucher for his obsessive gamer of a step brother’s upcoming Birthday and slide on back out and home in time for the re-run of America’s Next Top Model series 5. But, as he was browsing the computer section – he had made a wrong turn and had got distracted by all the gadgets and had started marvelling at the slim line computers and how shiny and new they looked – one of the shop assistants had sidled on over, and started chattering on and on about the inner workings of the computer Kurt had touched for a mere three seconds.
“Hey, welcome to Best Buy.” Kurt closes his eyes briefly and pulls his lips into a thin line, he really dislikes attentive shop assistants, more so when he really just wants to go home. He inhales through his nose deeply, fixes a tight smile on his face and turns, “…its brand new. It can also be purchased in an assortment of col-“
“Yeah…” Kurt says, but it comes out on a shaky exhale.
The assistant, this boy, short but lean and muscular, is…well, beautiful. His curls are stretched tight across his scalp with an abundance of gel, yes, but some of the curls have sprung free and dangle behind his ears and over his forehead, and his eyes, though hidden behind a pair of dark horn rimmed glasses, are a bright molten gold. Kurt gawps at him for a moment, his eyes raking over the boy from head to foot. His royal blue polo stretches across his torso, hugs at his sinfully muscular biceps, is pulled taught at his thin waist and is tucked into the waist band of his tight beige pants. Of all outfits to find attractive, this should not be one of them.
Kurt should feel embarrassed for admiring this boy so blatantly, but as his eyes trail up the boy’s body again to his face, he finds that he isn’t alone in his ogling. The boy’s eyes, now a mesmerising honey brown seem to be exploring every inch of Kurt’s body with such awe. Kurt thinks he should feel weird about it, embarrassed even but he doesn’t, he feels kind of proud, especially when their gazes meet again and the boy’s lips part into a small ‘o’.
Rating PG-13 (future parts will have higher ratings)
Summary Five years after graduation, Rachel and Kurt run into a billboard with Blaine’s face on it in Times Square. They sneak in to watch him rehearse (because, hey, it’s not the first time they’ve broken into Gershwin) hoping to rekindle the friendship they once had, and for Kurt, maybe a little more.
Summary: Blaine gets a visit from Kurt, who has some rather good news that could brighten his day.
Kurt grinned at him as he sat down on the chair, opening the magazine up. “Oh, I know,” he said, and then he began to read, and Blaine leaned back against the headboard again, unable to take his eyes off of his boyfriend. Under his breath he began to hum A Pirate’s Life for Me.
“Stop,” Kurt said, not looking up from the magazine, but Blaine could see the smile from over the top of the magazine.
“Aye, aye, Capt'n.”
Kurt reached over and flicked his shoulder. “Oh, hush, you.”
(The Snow White gif has nothing to do with anything, but IT HAD DISNEY AND I AM AMUSED BY IT.)
I’ll be back next Thursday, so yay! And while my queue isn’t nearly as exciting as I want it to be (things get a little hectic when you start a new job), there are three updates of Poison and Wine waiting for you! Tell me what you think of it, mmkay?
I’ll be back soon! You can follow my adventures on my Twitter if you’d like! (My handle is OsmosisGirl.)
ALSO I GET TO MEET VALE. WE’RE SPENDING A DAY TOGETHER IN THE PARKS. IT’LL BE VALE AND CAITLIN DAY YAAAAAY!!!!
Girl!Klaine. Going shopping together (for anything).
:D :D :D
“So, what do you think of… this one?” Blair asked as she grabbed the dress and held it up to her body, twirling around in a circle once.
Kate crossed her legs as she leaned forward, her eyes narrowed as she attempted to look at the dress and not her girlfriend’s body. “Hmm… I like it!” She finally stated, glad that they had finally picked out a dress for the upcoming dance.
Blair gave her a happy smile, one that had Kate’s heart dancing up and down in her chest. “Thank you for your input, sweetie. You know how horrible I am at finding dresses that accent my body, as you put it.”
Kate nodded, then stood up and took Blair’s hand. “Let’s go make the purchase then.”
They walked hand in hand up to the counter, where the dress was paid for and placed in a bag. On the way out, Blair leaned over and placed a quick kiss to Kate’s cheek. “Are we still going to stop by that lingerie store?” she whispered. “I really wanted to get that one piece I saw, because it would look fantastic on you.”
Kate’s grip tightened on Blair’s hand as she turned on her heel and headed towards the other end of the mall. “And you’re buying this one?” she asked as they made their way towards the store.
So, Kris and Vale wrote fic together without me, and then in response to my keysmashing at them and their awesomeness, told me to go and write. So this is for them, because they tend to keep me sane in this fandom, and I love them. ♥ The chance to write Blanana friendship was a bonus.
Spoilers for 3x05, but mostly the really old ones that we’ve known about for weeks.