I have a dream
where I’m reaching out for you
I have a dream
where I tuck myself
between your jawline,
your seamless shoulder.
It’s a little bit like drowning
like dying and wanting to be alive
in the same frame of motion.
I am breathing the salt in.
I am breathing the air out.
I am breathing the salt in.
I always knew we were made
from nooks and crannies,
your breath, where our skin touches,
like the bellows of the Earth
I always knew
that a cheek to a shoulder blade-
you are setting me on fire
I am letting you
raze me. raze me.
I have nothing more to do
than be here & isn’t that nice?
Bring me into your body,
your pulse around my fingers,
your muscles tangled
with my nervous limbs. I will show you fear
in a handful of dust.
Are you afraid?
Summary: Jim, a poor and simple employee, struggles from getting hurt as he falls for the rich, hot and beautiful, Mayim, whom he can only have as his girlfriend in his dreams for he was too out of her league.
Mayim remained faithful to Ryan since she had Jim as her secretary, she had certain flings but then she decided to stick out with Ryan instead. Jim would always see them flirt out right next to him but he remained silent about his feelings for her, she loved her a lot but he knew he wasn’t enough so he just let things flow next to his eyes.
Mayim felt strange about Ryan lately. She felt like he’s cheating on her and she was right. She discretely followed him by chances to catch him on act. Little did it surprise her that she was right — he was cheating on her with his ex girlfriend, Kenya.
“How dare you!” She yelled as she ambushed him with slap upon seeing him make out with Kenya at his office. She followed it with a slap on Kenya’s face. He immediately protected Kenya from her. “I knew you were cheating on me!” Mayim yelled at them, he was guilty. “You’re such a slut! You were an ex for a reason but you can’t keep your horny self to yourself!” Mayim continued yelling and repeatedly slammed his face in anger. “Stop it!” Kenya stopped her. “Stop flirting with my boyfriend!” She countered, she won’t stop so Kenya slapped her — silencing everyone.
“Fuck you.” Mayim swore.
“Yeah, fuck me. Did you know that you’re boyfriend fucked me too?” Kenya countered. Mayim’s eyes grew in her response. “He fucked me hard.” She added.
“Let me tell you something, bitch. I fucked this guy you were kissing seconds ago first before you did!” She replied which provoked Kenya to slap her face. Ryan tried to stop them from fighting. “Let me go!” Mayim yelled as he separated them.
“You know what? I’m done! We’re done, Ryan! Fuck you and your sluts!” She yelled and broke up with him before walking out.
Mayim has been in a bad mood lately since their break up causing her excessive yelling to Jim. Ryan and Mayim’s break up has been around the company already causing her so much annoyance hearing the employees gossip about her.
Jim handed Mayim a document for review when she suddenly bursted out in fury causing her to say hurtful words to him out of nowhere.
“Seriously? Can’t you see what I’m going through right now and you’re giving me another bullshit to think about? Are you that inconsiderate? Don’t you understand? Oh! It’s Jim! You don’t have feelings! How can I forget. You know what? Fuck you all. You’re probably laughing behind my back lately because of my break up but who cares? I don’t care about you! Fuck you! You’re a useless piece of shit. You don’t even talk! You’re so shy. You’re so scared. Guess what? Who cares if you’re talking behind my back? At least someone cares about me? How about you? Nobody cares! So get the fuck out of my face now!” She said continuously startling and hurting him.
“Now!” She slammed her table — he panicked and immediately walked away. He was badly startled with the words he heard from her, he wasn’t used to such things and worst part is it came from Mayim, the girl he looks up and woes to.
Afternoon came, the employees started to go home. Jim went back to the office to get his things trying to act timidly to keep from getting Mayim’s attention. She looked at him as he entered the office and fix his things. He looked so nice and soft, she felt so guilty for saying the things she said to him. She sighed and stood up heading closer to his small desk.
“Hey.” She said in a soft voice. He was a bit stunned, he has always been like that when she talks to him.
“Uhm… Hello, miss Mayim. I’m about to go. Do you need anything else?” He replied politely.
“Oh. Uhm, nothing. I… Uhm… Just wanna… Apologize?“ She began, he didn’t see it coming.
“For yelling at you a while back. I was just carried away. I didn’t mean it. Really.” She continued. He always had a soft spot for her in his heart that he didn’t have a second thought in forgiving her. He smiled softly at her. “It’s alright, miss Mayim.” He replied. She was amazed with how easy he could forgive her and be able to give her a smile. “Really?” She had to confirm. He replied with a polite nod and continued fixing his things.
“Do you need anything else, miss Mayim?” He asked. “No…” She replied. He nodded and started to walk away. “Jim.” She stopped him. He turned around and looked at her. “Do you wanna hitch in?” She asked. “Hitch in?” He asked in confusion. “Yeah. Uhm. Ride my car. I’ll ask my driver to drop you by your house.” She clarified.
“Oh, that’s not necessary, ma'am. Thank you-”
“Come on.” She grabbed his hand and insisted. He could no longer say no.
As they rode her car, he started to doubt the reality. He couldn’t believe he was on solo with her and it is not in the office. They were so close to each other inside her car.
“Uhm. Thank you for this ride, miss Mayim.” He cuts the silence.
“Yeah.” She replied shortly. He wondered what was she thinking. “Are you alright, ma'am?” He asked. She wanted to hear that, she’s been yearning for someone to ask her that and she felt so glad he did. She looked at him and saw the sincerity of his concern.
“I’m sorry to ask, if you think I’m crossing a line, you don’t have to answer-”
“No. I needed that.” She cuts in.
“So…” He hanged.
“Have you ever felt like want to bomb the whole world, punch everyone, yell at people because you’re so angry at something… Or someone?” She began sharing. He couldn’t recall being in such scenarios but he recalled a place called “Plates” — a restaurant where you can buy porcelain as much plates as you want for only $1.00 each and throw it against the wall to release your anger and frustrations.
“I know a place that can make you feel better… It is called plates. It is beside-”
“Louie, you heard him. Bring us to Plates.” She cuts in and commands her driver. She had no idea what that place is but she believed him.
Jim guided her as they entered the place. She looked around feeling odd as she saw several people throwing plates at the frustration booths as if it was a thing. Jim came closer to her and handed her a pile of plates. “Give it a try.” He offered. She snorted. “This is embarrassing… And stupid.” She refused. He looked at the other girl beside them yelling as if it’s the end of the world while throwing the plates. Mayim looked at her as well and looked back at him.
“Fine… But this is really weird.” She said as she grabbed a plate and took a deep breath — closed her eyes and silently swore about Ryan. She threw the plate against the wall and the sound of shattering made her feel bizarrely better.
He looked at her with his eyes asking if that helped her. He extended his arms and offered her some more plates. “That actually helped.” She confessed and continued throwing plates and her swearing just got louder.
“Fuck you, Ryan!”
“You’re such a fuck boy! Go to hell!
“You are useless, why did I even trust you!”
“You’re the worst!”
“You should die in the carnal level of hell!”
“I’m going to find-”
She stopped as she ran out of plates. “That’s all that we’ve got?” She asked Jim. “Uh…” He uttered. “Get some more!” She said eagerly.
“I’m going to find someone better than you!”
“That would be so easy!”
“To find a nice guy who’s not a fuck boy like you!”
She continued swearing and ended up being breathless with the extreme release of anger.
“I hope that helped…” Jim uttered as she breathes heavily. “It actually did.” She replied and smiled at him.
“This is a restaurant right?” She asked. “Yeah.” He answered. “Let’s eat here.” She suggested. He paused for a while, he thought that the restaurant isn’t classy like where Mayim usually eats at and he was afraid she’ll be disappointed with it. “Well, this is’t the restaurant you usually go to-”
“Let’s take our orders!” She squealed. They took their orders and luckily, she enjoyed the meals even if she wasn’t used to eating on some mid class types of restaurants. She vented out to Jim as they go through their meals, she never felt more comfortable and relieved in venting out about Ryan than him. He listened to her, he wasn’t biased — her friends would always say that she has to get back with Ryan for the sake of the company and they always see their arguments as shallow and easy to mend up.
“Thank you, Jim. Good night.” She said before he went down the car as they arrived at their place. “You’re welcome, miss Mayim. Good night as well.” He replied and left.
To be continued…
A/N: spoilers for next chapter is a lot of Jim and Mayim’s bonding and hanging out! Hope you like this chapter! Keep supporting!
Summary:Jim, a poor and simple employee, struggles from getting hurt as he falls for the rich, hot and beautiful, Mayim, whom he can only have as his girlfriend in his dreams for he was too out of her league.
Mayim and Jim continued hanging out after work hours. Mayim enjoyed his company, it helped her ease her distress over Ryan’s cheating and the pressure from her father.
“Where are we going now?” Jim asked. “Somewhere I always go to when I’m mad.” Mayim replied. As they reached their destination, Mayim assisted him. “Firing range?” Jim gasped. “You got plates? I got bullets.” She winked at him as the people assisted her.
“Miss Mayim.” The guy handed her a revolver and a 9mm. “This one’s for you.” She handed him the 9mm. His eyes grew in overwhelm. “I don’t know how to use this.” He said shaking. She placed the eye protector on jim. “I’ll teach you.” She said before she covered his ears with the ear puffs.
They walked to the range area and set themselves up. She taught him the basics of handling. “This is a 9mm. It’s recoil is weaker than this (revolver).” She told him. “Alright…” He uttered still quite nervous in handling the gun. “One feet backward. Hold it straight. This is where you’ll look at, and then this and then the target.” She continued. “Now, this is the trigger lock, open it, move your hands to the trigger, don’t hold it when you’re not going to fire yet.” She informed him. “Alright.” He replied. She unlocked his trigger lock and took a step back. “Now try firing.” She told him. He gulped and aimed for the target and pulled the trigger, he took his first shot. “Great!” She cheered and assisted him in putting down the gun as she pointed to him where his shot went.
“Now try again. Finish your sixteen rounds.” She cheered for him and he took his rounds getting a bit shocked for every shot which he got used to after a couple more.
After finishing their firing session, they decided to go home.
“Thank you for the day, Ms. Bialik.” Jim thanked her before he was about to go down. She wanted to spend some more time with him and so she thought of an idea. “It’s a cold night. Won’t you invite me for some coffee?” She asked making him a bit stunned. “Uhm… Sure. Sure.” They went down the car and he escorted her inside his small house and immediately prepared a cup of coffee for her. “I’m sorry, I only got this kinds of coffee.” He apologized and showed her his instant coffee packs. “I’m sure you’re used to some imported coffees. This is all I’ve got.” He elaborated and handed her the cup of coffee. “It’s fine.” She replied and smiled.
He sat opposite her in the couch awkwardly clueless of how to start a nice conversation. “You seem tensed.” She noticed. “Oh. Uhm.” He uttered and giggled. “So you live here alone? What are you doing? Where’s your family?” She asked. “Yeah. I actually live in Texas but I stay here for work. I pay for my cousins’ basic needs.” He shared. “Oh… Where’s your parents? Your family?” She asked again. “Oh… I don’t actually have parents. My mother isn’t my real mother, she said my real parents left me in front of their gate when I was a baby… So… Yeah. I’m all alone.” He shared. She heard the insincere happiness in his voice, she knew he wasn’t very okay. “Oh. I’m sorry to ask.” She apologized. “It’s alright.” He replied. She took her last sip of coffee and bid her goodbye. “I should probably go. It’s getting late.” He escorted her outside up to her car.
“Thank you again for this day, Miss Mayim.” He thanked her. “Sure. Thank you too.” She replied and they exchanged smiles. “Good night.” She told him. He blushed a bit. “Uhm… Good night, miss Mayim.” He replied shyly struggling not to blush in front of her. “Yeah.” She uttered waiting for him to initiate some sweet good night kiss. An awkward silence swarmed them and their blushing cheeks are the only relevant that moment. He wanted to kiss her good night but he hesitated fearing she would find it disrespectful and gross.
“Ugh. You really won’t do it, do you?” She breaks in the silence making him speechless. “I said good night.” She repeated. “Uhm… Yeah. Goo- good night.” He stammered and didn’t kiss her. She rolled her eyes finding his awkwardness cute. “You’re such a dork.” She uttered and initiated a kiss on his cheek. “You kiss a girl after a date.” She informed him and went inside the car. He was left speechless as her car drove away. He touched his cheek and reminisced that short time that his dream girl’s lips patted on it, he couldn’t believe it happened, it was like a dream.
Next day was a Sunday, no work day. Jim decided to stay home for he didn’t have plans. He took a bath, and got into some nice shirt and khaki shorts. He sat down and watched the television as he ate some chips.
Someone knocked on the door, he looked at his watch, it was just 9AM, too early for the landowner to come to ask him to drop some cash advance. “Who could it be?” He whispered and opened the door. He turned speechless, his feet abruptly turned into a hard cement as he saw Mayim standing at the doorsteps. “Miss Mayim?” He uttered in surprise. “Hey!” She exclaimed. “Sorry, I wasn’t able to inform you that I’m coming.” She apologized making him wonder. “Are you ready?” She asked. He felt clueless. He gasped and grabbed his phone in his pocket and checked on the inbox.
Hang out tomorrow? You can’t say no.
An unread message from last night. “Oh.” He uttered. She smiled at him. “You can’t say no.” She said. He was too busy thinking about her last night that he didn’t check his phone at all. She looked at him and thought his clothes were good already. She grabbed his hand and pulled him over to her car, he had no choice and he wanted to be with her too anyway.
“Wait, I forgot my wallet!” He panicked. She held his hand stopping him. “No need, put it all on me.” She winked at him. “To the theme park.” She told her driver. “Theme park?” He asked. “Yeah. We’ll have some fun.” She told him.
After a couple of minutes, they reached their destination. The owner of the theme park was her friend and so they got the entrance for free. She immediately pulled him to the Haunted Mansion hoping she would hear him scream but it ended up that she was the one screaming in fear. She found it inevitable to control herself in shock and surprise, she was tightly squeezing his arms and unconsciously burying her face in his biceps. On another hand, instead of being shocked and surprised by horror, Jim got his attention to how close she was to him inside the mansion, he could feel butterflies trying to explode in his stomach.
As soon as they reached the exit, Mayim realized she didn’t hear him shout. “You didn’t even shout. What the hell?” She complained and got them laughing. “I know.” She uttered and pulled him to the Space Mountain. As they were almost in front of the line, Jim failed to resist his urge of asking. “What is this ride?” He asked looking so clueless because everything was dark.
“A roller coaster in the dark.” She winked at him. “Next, ma'am and sir.” The lady assisted them. His eyes grew. “A roller coaster?!” He asked as they assisted the passengers of the ride with their designated seats and seatbelts. “Enjoy.” She uttered, the ride started to move. “Oh my goodness.” He uttered. She felt thrilled. The ride began to move slowly forward and slightly increasing its speed and going fast after the first loop. Jim shouted in fun and fear as the ride hastened. Mayim couldn’t see him but she could clearly hear him making her laugh so hard. “Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!” He shouted. She couldn’t stop laughing barely noticing that he was already embracing her. After several loops, the ride stopped and a slight light shined through them making them realize how close they were. He looked at her with his lips just an inch away from her, she hoped he would kiss her but he didn’t. “I’m sorry.” He apologized and fixed himself as the ride freed them from their seats.
“Wanna eat?” She asked him. He still felt embarrassed. “Sure.” He uttered. She bought some nachos and cheese sauce. “That was so fun!” She recalled. “I didn’t know you can produce louder sounds.” She joked and fed him with a piece of nacho looking so sweet. “Oh no. I’m so embarrassed.” He closed his eyes. “I think it’s cute.” She smiled at him. He looked at her as she continued eating the nachos while they were walking.
Soon after they rode the other rides, the decided to go home.
As she arrived at home, she started to evaluate her feelings. She felt so happy around him, so happy that she almost forgot that she broke up with Ryan and that he cheated on her. It felt like nothing to her, she thought that she just wanna be with Jim all the time. She felt safe, loved and sincerely valued which she never felt from any other man. She knew he liked her for being her, not just because he wants to have sex with her and she loved that feeling.
Favourite Famous Person: Tom Hiddleston, Aubrey Plaza
Favourite Book: I’m gonna go with “the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” this time
Dream Trip: New Zealand, Ireland, Japan
What I’m Wearing: Work scrubs, they are blue and white :)
and then bdragneel tagged me in this awhile back I’M SO so sorry for being lazy!!! :3
Anything I’m looking forward to? I’m going downtown with a friend tomorrow night. There’s this bar that has “dueling pianos” they play music all night, take requests and get people on stage for shenanigans (the waiters even dance on the bar, omg ITS A BLAST)
Any body alternations you want? more ear piercings (triple forward helix and a third on my lobe) a tattoo may be in my future. Also, get in better shape, I am so lazy :P
My most played song? WAMS and Twenty Dollar Nosebleed - Fall Out Boy
My favorite ice cream flavour? I love all ice cream ^^
Am I happy with where I am? Living with mom, so no. Work is great, just got a raise. Its so-so
Name one embarrassing moment? Weeell I was at Magic Mountain last week, my friend and I like to play “Heads Up” when we’re in line. She was trying to guess Napoleon Dynamite and I yelled the first thing that popped into my head “TINA YOU FAT LARD!” like 30 people turn to look at me like I’m crazy :P
My favorite meal? Breakfast after my morning coffee.
Anyone I miss right now? my kitty cat. He’s in the custody of my ex. boooo. also some old friends I’m trying to reconnect with (don’t forget the code like I did! Hoes before bros. Uteruses before duderuses. Ovaries before brovaries. -thank you Leslie Knope!)
Name one bad habit? sleeping in when I should be at the gym.
Christian Charity (1 Peter 4: 7-11)
“The end of all things is at hand. Therefore, be serious and sober for prayers. Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace. Whoever preaches, let it be with the words of God; whoever serves, let it be with the strength that God supplies, so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.”
#catholic #AMDG #JMJ #prayer #christian #scripture #firstpope #firstletterofthepeter #peter #pedro #vivailpapa #pope #saint #stpeter
i never noticed it before but on/around christmas my mom leaves boxes of cookies and some money on top of our garbage can and mailbox for the garbage men and mail lady and that’s probably the sweetest thing i’ve ever heard
she also gives presents to the traffic directors outside of my school