Reading a post

So I’m laying in bed reading posts to my fiance when I read the post about the little rogue and the 6int barbarian.
She’s not understanding the confusion that the barbarian is having as I explain the meaning of gait. She keeps thinking the barbarian is referring to the rogues breasts as the “Door”. 

I look at her and say “It’s a 6 intelligence barbarian and you’re currently being a 6 int Fiance.” 

She spent a solid 60 seconds laughing. Needless to say she now loves your blog but still does not get the joke.


 — ‣‣ after seeing the crying girl run upstairs, xander muttered a string of curse words to himself before reluctantly following behind her. the hallway was dark and silent – the exact opposite from the party going on downstairs – but a sliver of light peeked out from under the door of the bathroom. he gave the wood a quiet knock and leaned against it. “hey, this might be a bad time, but i’m not really supposed to have people upstairs.”

closer;; kyt

It didn’t take long for Ky to get from his weekend home to Kit’s, aside from a quick stop to the nearest 7-11 store to pick up some additional snacks and a slushy. Parking up his truck, and heading up to Kit’s door, he knocked lightly when he reached it so not to disturb the sleeping kitten in his arms, snuggled up against the warm material of his STAR Labs sweatshirt that really was far too big for him, not much shorter than the basketball shorts that reached his knees. He waited patiently, gently stroking between Mew’s eyes, his foot tapping a little against the pavement.

  • ANYA:Hey, you! This is soooo last minute, but I'm in LA until tomorrow. My sister's keeping an eye on the dogs and cat, but you're more than welcome to pop in and spend some time with them in the morning if you're up for it! If not, no worries.

i am like obsessively trying to learn how to contour my face before my j*b int*rview because even though it’s for a plus size clothing line i feel like my face is too fat for them to see me as a professional ughhhhh

anonymous asked:

4 20 6 9

  • 4.What’s your religion?

fuck god + also jesus

  • 6.Reason you joined tumblr?

somewhere to put the davekat porn that almost got me banned off of deviantART lmao

  • 9.Kissed in the rain?

i havent !!!!

  • 20.Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?

ya,,, , honestly i have brown eyes but my family swears up and down theyre hazel and look hella green if i wear the right stuff int he right lighting

spooky-gedward  asked:

wait you are swedish?? so am I!! and i love oscar too he's my father.

Jag menar jag är skånsk tekniskt sett sååå jag är ju inte svensk höhö. (Det där var sarkasm. Jag är inte stolt över det tbh. SD har sitt högkvarter i min hemstad. Klasskompisar luktade gödsel när de kom till skolan på högstadiet för att de varit ute i lagården på morgonen.)

It’s that time of year though, y’all dumbasses are gonna try n’ make a deep fried turkey. Just fuckin’ drop a giant bird int’ a full vat of oil and then get fuckin’ mad when it explodes 

“Oh my god lil’ Timmy has third degree burns! Our house is on fire! My eyebrows are gone! Thanksgivin’ is ruined!”  Shut the fuck up

If y’all fuckin’ had half a brain you’d know not t’ drop an eight pound bird corpse int’ a fryer filled t’ the brim with boilin’ oil. Liquid get’s fuckin’ displaced when y’ put shit in it- big fuckin’ whoop. Y’ also don’t just THROW thing’s int’ it. Course the whole thing is gonna blow up. But why should you be careful with hot oil? You’re special smart and perfect. Ain’t nothin’ gonna hurt you!