*gmw

  • Maya: Wait for it. Wait for it...9:01! Riley Matthews is officially late for the first time ever. All right, let's do this. Who's got theories?
  • Zay: Uh... Alarm didn't go off.
  • Maya: All three alarms? All with battery back-up? Come on, who wants to take this seriously?
  • Farkle: Oh! She was taken in her sleep!
  • Maya: That's what I'm talking about! Super dark, Farkle, but way more plausible than Zay's idiotic alarm clock theory.
  • Lucas: I bet she tucked herself into bed too tight and got stuck.
  • Smackle: Mm, maybe she fell into another dimension where she's interesting.
  • Cory: It's 9:00 A.M. Why is no one working?
  • Maya: Riley is a few minutes late, and we're all trying to guess why.
  • Cory: I'd like to play. I'd say she's... in line at the bank. This is fun.
  • Maya: It is fun, but you're all wrong. She clearly slipped through a subway grate and is having terrible sex with a mole man.
  • [Riley runs in frantically]
  • Maya: There she is. Riley. Where have you been?! We've been worried sick! Do you care to explain yourself?!
  • Riley: I'm just 70 seconds late. It's not a big deal. Don't worry about it.
  • Cory: Riley, you will tell us, and you will tell us now.
  • Riley: ...There was a problem at the bank.
  • Cory: Hot damn!

nothing is as unsatisfying as a cancelled tv show with a otp that had potential to be endgame if they just had one more season to sort their feelings and shit out