*closer

Let the Light In

Chapter 37: Directive

Rey awoke to repeating thuds with her mind fuzzy and her body heavy. One bleary glance around the room showed her that light was filtering in. Rey guessed she had slept for about four or five hours. Four or five glorious, dream-free hours. There was a subdued, almost humming, presence in her mind, and Rey found that Ben was still there. He had not left, although…Rey huffed a tiny laugh when she realised why his consciousness was so unresponsive. He had fallen asleep too.

She let her head fall back onto her pillow, her eyes closed again, and smiled just for herself.

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Just a Closer Walk With Thee - Grant Green ‎(Feelin’ The Spirit, 1963)

I NEEDED TO MAKE THIS.

Original videos:

Take a closer look at that snout: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvemPyOJZEY

Australia’s Got Talent 2016 Promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRGuf81DAXg

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how about  ~s  u  n  r  i  s  e    l  a  n d 

SnK Ch 78: It’s that kind of death wish season

In June 2014, Hajime Isayama posted a song on his blog that he thought would be fitting for Bertholdt. It was called “The Season I Want to Die”.

I caught the cherry blossoms while suicide bombing
Holy voices playing a melody
Find me right now

Hey, that’s right. If we give up
Somehow life becomes easier

When @didanwhisperer​ first posted it, I remember wondering if Isayama was trolling us or giving us new insight. With chapter 78, I think I have that answer.

This chapter drew unmistakable parallels between Bertholdt and Mikasa. They were born into a cruel world. Acknowledging that cruelty made them strong. Mikasa stopped shaking; Bertholdt stopped sweating. Their fear was replaced with clarity and control.

But it’s the areas where Mikasa and Bert diverge that I find most interesting. When facing the cruelty of the world, Mikasa could look beyond it to see beauty and love. She chose to focus on those things and in doing so, she found the strength to live.

That hasn’t happened to Bertholdt. While his love for Annie and Reiner are undeniable, he’s drawn clear lines. Annie can be fed to the pigs and Reiner may not survive the blast. Bertholdt is ok with that. Friendships are of secondary importance to him. 

I almost get the sense that Bertholdt views killing them all as merciful. The cruelty of the world is too much for him. He can’t fight it. He thinks back to Marco’s death and the betrayal of his friends as tests of his resolve. 

Still, he’s no monster. I laughed at how quickly he tried to reassure Armin that he wasn’t evil. He didn’t want Armin to die thinking it was his fault.  Essentially Bertholdt tells him, “You are my friends and you are good people. You’ve done nothing wrong but I have to kill you.” He says it with a calm and earnest expression like somehow it will make sense to us. 

If I’m being honest, very little in this chapter made sense. I am once again left with more questions than answers and I find my frustration growing. Why does humanity have to die? Why did the peace within the walls come with an expiration date? Who really is the enemy?

Bertholdt’s character song ends on an ominous note:

I want to hurry up and die,
I want to hurry up and die,
It’s that kind of death wish season.

I wonder if Bertholdt is thinking along those same lines. Perhaps he’s able to accept the deaths of everyone he care for because he believes his own death won’t be far behind.

bts on valentines day

jungkook: too embarrassed to talk to you, taps you on the shoulder and puts a sticky note on your forehead before running away, the sticky note says “happy valentines day you look kind of ok sometimes”

jimin: the actual perfect boyfriend, buys you lots of roses and chocolates and caters to you all day, makes you feel like a princess and pampers you

namjoon: probably tries to do something romantic like buy fancy wine or something but when he tries to pour it into your glass he fucks up and spills it all over the table

yoongi: not really one for romantic gestures but he really understands you and knows whatll make you happy, buys you something substantial like a new pair of headphones or maybe even concert tickets since its something you two can enjoy together

jin: the most romantic of bts, he would be so warm and gush over you and make your day the absolute best it can be, hed go out of his way to make you happy, takes it a little overboard when he hires a violinist to come play a special song to dedicate his love to you over a filet mignon dinner

hoseok: wants to do something unique, hed probably do something like choreograph a dance and then dedicate it to you in a special performance, coming over to you at the end with a dozen roses, smiling at how flustered he was able to make you

taehyung: romantic but also dorky, prints out valentines memes and sticks them all over your bedroom walls, yet makes up for it later by giving you lots of warm hugs that have you melting in his arms