I’m falling for him, hard,” she admits, “and I’m terrified.”
“This is different than anything I’ve ever felt before. I’ve been in love, but this is something else entirely.”
“He makes my heart hurt, in a good way. It’s like it’s so full it’s about to burst. He gives me much more than butterflies. He makes eye contact with me and I feel like I’ve been set on fire. I find myself looking for him everywhere.”
“I’m scared out of my mind. But honestly, I don’t think that it’s love if it doesn’t scare you.”
And I wanted to love her, oh god I wanted to love her. But what I felt wasnt love. It wasn’t anything, she was so broken and I wanted to fix her. Oh I wanted to fix her but I couldn’t do it anymore and I knew it would hurt her but I couldn’t do it anymore.
Excerpt from a book I will never write #1191 // i won’t kill myself trying to mend her pieces.
I used to spend my days dreaming all day and night. I would gaze at the classroom ceiling in class using the patterned tiles to feed my yearning ambiguous imagination. I dreamt that all the holes in the ceiling were little stars in a far far away galaxy. A beautiful galaxy filled with people of many different kinds. I dreamt about swashbuckling pirates sailing the seven deadly seas and stealing away boxes of gold after gold and spending their nights sealed away in a cavern. Or beautiful mermaids spending their days lounging around with friendly dolphins who would use their immense amounts of energy to play all day and swim endlessly all night. Every night finding the most gorgeous and vibrant coral reefs. And find the most extraordinary creatures of the sea. Some big, some small, some pink, some blue, some with tails, and some with fins. But then I met you and then those patterns on the ceiling tiles started to turn into constellations on your face. One dot turned into two and two turned into three until all the dots came to form your handsome face. Your small round nose that always seems to crinkle up when you smiled too big or laughed too hard. The kind of nose that belongs with your smile. It completes the handsome painting that is your smile. Your big adventurous eyes that reel me in. Your warm brown eyes that leave me on a cliffhanger.