Strip Club

Pairing: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Author: @ninja-stiles

Words: 2427

Prompt #1: Why are we at a strip club? by anonymous

Author’s Note: This was fun to write, and I’ve been told that I need to make a part two or a mini series! Thanks to @were-cheetah-stiles for proofreading this for me, she’s great guys!

Originally posted by sarcasticallystilinski

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Description: Dan’s touch was an accident. Phil’s roughness was an accident. Or at least that’s what they each said. But only one was telling the truth.

Genre: Smut, but you know me, there’s a lil bit of fluff at the end 

Warnings: v kinky shit, Smut, Swearing, BDSM, Choking, Major Character Injury

Word Count: 1269

A/N: Why do I feel like most of my smut is really more of a crack fic smh

“Dan, come on! We need to get filming!” Phil called. Dan stumbled out of his bedroom, wearing Phil’s emoji pajama pants and tousled hair. “You just woke up, didn’t you?” Dan nodded, and Phil rolled his eyes. “Just get ready.” 

After about fifteen minutes, they were settled in their gaming chairs. Phil put on his gaming channel face and they turned the camera on. “Hello there, DanAndPhilGAMES papis!” Dan burst out laughing, stretching out his legs. The camera couldn’t see, but under the desk, Dan was wearing his tightest black jeans, which he knew turned Phil on. Now was not the time. 

He tore his eyes off Dan’s bulge and up to his eyes, giving him a stern look. Dan smirked before turning to the camera. Despite Phil feeling like minutes had passed, the whole exchange only lasted a second. “Today we’re going to be playing Dream Daddy again!” Phil grinned. They launched into the game, attempting to forget what had just happened, but it still remained in the back of Phil’s mind. 

“Oh, damn!” Dan said as they arrived on the choice whether or not to go into Robert’s house. “This is getting steamy.” He laid himself out over Phil’s lap, a sexual smirk on his face. 

“You’re just making this more editing for yourself.” 

“Worth it.” 

Phil rolled his eyes, finally deciding to give Dan what he probably wanted. “If you don’t get off, I’m going to have to punish you later.” 

“Oh, pity.” 

“Get off of me!” Phil laughed, pushing Dan up and back into his chair, which creaked from the bouncing springs as he settled his weight back into it. The two decided to get back to filming so Dan would have time to edit before their joint liveshow at eight. Dan surprisingly didn’t bother Phil again, but he had a feeling that wouldn’t last long. 

Phil walked in while Dan was editing out the part of the new gaming video with him on Phil’s lap. He watched as Dan clicked the button and sent the clip into the abyss. “Having fun there?” 

“Not really. I’m pretty hungry,” he said, peeling himself out of his chair and walking past Phil, brushing his crotch against Phil’s as he made his way to the door. He peered around the corner, winking before heading to the kitchen. “Sorry. Just an accident.” Phil needed to start coming up with punishment plans. 

Phil was a bit terrified when Dan plopped down beside him on the couch at 7:59. He knew the man would have something planned, but he was worried about its subtlety. They couldn’t edit this stream; whatever was said was said. There was no going back. 

Dan and his tight jeans sat obediently waiting for the liveshow to start; this in itself told Phil he was definitely doing his favorite thing: waiting for the perfect time. Usually he did that for videos, but this time it was mayhem. “Hey, guys!” Phil said, on time for a liveshow for once. 

“Yo.” Dan made finger guns at the camera, acting like his normal self again. All went well until the liveshow was nearly over. “Oh, yeah!” Dan shouted. He suddenly sprawled himself across both Phil and the couch, reaching over to the table on the other side and grabbing a candle. “I wanted to show you my new candle!” He pulled it back across Phil, rubbing it across the slight bulge in Phil’s jeans as he sat cross-legged. 

Phil’s eyes went wide as Dan put on his signature smirk. Could the viewers see that? He anxiously watched as messages in the chat popped up. 

Did you guys see that? 

Look at their faces! 

The candle! Did you see what he did with the candle?

Oh my gosh phan is 10/10 real!

“You know, it’s been a while; I think we should probably get going,” Phil said, a nervous smile crossing his face. He said a few goodbyes and waited until the show completely cut off before slamming his laptop shut. “Do you know what you just did?” He screamed at Dan, his face red with anger. 

“Of course I do. I caused more hype. You should be thanking me.” 

“You do know they expect even more from us now, right?” 


Phil was done. He couldn’t handle Dan’s shit that day anymore. “You’re going to get it now.” He shoved Dan against the wall, pressing his lips to the younger man’s. Just like a movie, Phil pulled him from the wall and forced him into the bedroom and onto the bed. “Undress.” Dan did as he was told, knowing the punishment would be way more severe if he didn’t. 

Phil pulled out a box from underneath his bed, his cock throbbing just at the sight of it. He opened the wooden box and took out a few ropes. “You’ve made quite a few mistakes today, slut.” He looks up to Dan, who undressed while he was getting the ropes. “Now it’s time for your punishment.” 

He casually tied Dan to the bedposts as if it was nothing. He didn’t need any foreplay; the sight of his boyfriend tied up and ready to be used like his rag doll was enough to get Phil hard. 

He slathered his boner in lube before going straight in. Dan winced at the abrupt entrance, but Phil didn’t feel remorse. It was all part of the punishment. He knew Dan liked it anyway; it was just a bit extreme to punish him for his actions.

Picking up his thrusts, Phil wrapped his hands around Dan’s neck. He tightened his grip to cut off a bit of air flow, choking Dan rhythmically with his thrusts. Falling into his own head, Phil stopped paying attention for a moment and was suddenly met with the sound of muffled screams. “Phil!-” Dan spluttered, his face turning shades of purple. “Pineapple!” He wracked his brain for a moment before realizing pineapple was the safe word. Jerking himself back to life, Phil pulled out, his hands falling limp. After a moment of pure shock, he untied the ropes binding Dan to the bedposts. He fell to the sheets, panting. Phil still couldn’t seem to grasp the situation. 

“I- I’m so sorry!” he stuttered. “Are you okay?” Dan nodded wearily, but Phil wasn’t convinced. “It was just an accident, I’m so sorry!” 

“Yeah, sure,” Dan said, the color returning to his face. 

“It was!” Dan glared at him. “You think so lowly of me.” Phil shakes his head. “I would punish you, but that didn’t seem to go too well tonight.” 

“Maybe another time.” Dan winked. Phil wasn’t quite sure how Dan still had so much trust in him after that, but he was simply thankful for it at that point. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Phil asked, legitimate concern showing on his face. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Let’s just get some sleep, okay?”  Dan nestled himself under the covers, red marks from Phil’s fingers streaking across his neck. Phil didn’t think he’d do much sleeping at that point, but he crawled in beside Dan anyway. “I love you, Phil.” He had no clue how Dan was being so nice after he nearly choked him to death, but it just went to show how amazing of a boyfriend Dan really was. 

“I love you too.” Phil sighed, closing his eyes and entering his own world of thought. He reviewed the day in his head, tensing up at a few points. Finally reaching the end and finding himself with his arms wrapped around Dan’s waist, only one thought ran through his head: what a day of “accidents”. 


Under My Umbrella

This is my first headcanon, have mercy. I had to! Thank you to @centixue whose artwork inspired this fic. (Click that link the images will change your life.)

Ballet!Peter, LipSyncBattle!Peter, Crossdressing!Peter, Spideychelle

  • So one day it just randomly came up that Peter knows how to dance ballet
  • Pick your reason why.
  • Maybe Ned and Michelle are joking around about how Michelle used to have to do ballet when she was five, and how she only stayed for two lessons. All she remembers are the stupid ballet buns that she hated being pulled into.
  • And Peter being the little shit he is walks up and mentions eagerly that he still danced ballet
  • And Michelle and Ned are like no you don’t
  • And Peter does a pirouette and a leap to show them
  • And Ned is like BLOWN AWAY and keeps asking him to do it again.
  • So Peter decides to try and teach them how to do it. While Ned is just having a blast, Michelle falls a lot. Peter is doing his best to stop laughing but finally she hits the floor face first and he just loses it.
  • And Michelle is like “if you’re so good at it, how many can you do?”
  • Being Spiderman, Peter says 100 which is impossible but he likes challenges. Besides, he’s Spider-Man, so he can do anything.
  • Michelle insists that’s impossible but since Peter disagrees, she decides to make it a bet. So she proposes Peter needs to wear women’s clothes and do a wild dance for her and Ned if he can’t do it and if she loses, then Michelle and Ned will swap clothes for a week. Ned isn’t okay with this part of the deal but Michelle insists because Peter will lose.
  • Peter is so confident about this, he just goes for it without worrying. He’s on 34 pirouettes when he sees Michelle staring at him. She’s biting her lip and looking very amused, almost too amused. As he spins, he starts wondering why. This matters soooooo much for some reason.
  • Suddenly his focus point, what he uses to keep his balance, becomes her face. So he makes eye contact with her for every spin and she starts giving him these really confusing looks. He wants nothing more than to figure out what this face means and why it’s making him blush. Is she checking him out?
  • That question is enough to startle him, he stops spinning, he nearly falls flat on his face.
  • While Ned asks if he’s okay, Michelle just smiles down at him.
  • “Make it a really good dance, Parker,” she requests before walking out like she got what she wanted.
  • Once his ego recovered, Peter decided he’d have to really go for this. He took a week to prepare. He went into Aunt May’s closet for her party clothes and he put together an outfit. He rehearsed every day, sticking more and more risque dance moves in the routine, knowing he’d really make his friends laugh if he made it scandalous.
  • They settled on meeting in Ned’s house. When he walks in, he sees an open box of monopoly.
  • Michelle’s there already and she is splitting all of the monopoly money between herself and Ned
  • “The entertainment arrives,” she announces when she sees Peter.
  • “What are you doing?”
  • “We figured we could toss money at you while you dance.” Fuck.
  • This is to be expected from her.
  • He ignores her to go change in the bathroom. Peter even gives himself a pep talk in the bathroom mirror.
  • Something like “You’re Spider-Man. You can do this.” bc this little shit has battled giant mechanical birdmen and lived, he stole Cap’s shield, he took a punch from the Winter Soldier. He is ready to dance like he’s never danced before.
  • As he comes out, Ned and Michelle raise their voices and holler at him, Michelle even wolf whistles. Peter gets really into the song, his prop umbrella becoming almost a partner in the dance.
  • He’s shaking his hips and gesturing at both of them. Ned is covering his eyes for most of the routine, and Michelle is grabbing onto Ned’s shoulder for help as she holds her stomach and laughs.
  • Peter keeps running through his routine because he’s practiced and he knows exactly how to impress them. He’s flexible af and he uses that to the best of his ability.
  • He even gets so cocky he starts mouthing the lyrics to the song.
  • Finally, Ned and Michelle come back to the present and just starting clapping whenever he does something impressive. There’s one part where the umbrella goes between his legs and they both cover their eyes and have another laughing fit before they throw the fake money at him.
  • Peter actually starts to enjoy that part.
  • Honestly, this isn’t half bad.
  • Finally, Michelle seems to recover and just watches him as Ned still can’t keep it together.
  • And in that moment, Peter recognizes a difference. She isn’t embarrassed anymore, she’s just watching him with this smug look on her face. Just like when he was spinning. He stops for a moment, suddenly very self-conscious about the experience.
  • “No one told you to stop, Parker,” she chimes jokingly.
  • They stare at each other for a second before Peter resigns himself to his fate
  • He continues the routine, putting his game face on, but regretting including the part where he grinds against the umbrella
  • Especially since his eyes naturally traveled towards Michelle to see if she was making fun of him
  • Instead, she was making smug eye contact, looking content with herself and watching him dance.
  • When he finishes, there is a long silence before Ned and Michelle pushed into each other laughing. Ned asks how Peter learned to dance like that, and Michelle just praises him for going all out
  • How Michelle went back to pretending she wasn’t watching him like that, he didn’t know
  • She was acting like nothing happened.
  • Peter just bowed, keeping up his good spirits as they applauded him
  • When they finally stopped laughing, ten minutes later, Ned asks him where he got the outfit
  • Michelle stands up suddenly.
  • “I’m going to be late for dinner,” she pipes up. She walks up real close to Peter and takes a good look up and down before smiling. “The look suits you.” She pulls up one of his dress straps and tucks in a small folded up wad of Monopoly money, letting the strap snap him when she let it go.
  • “Bye losers.”
  • Peter stares after her, wondering what he’d just done and how he’d let himself walk into this situation.

Read the next part!

11 Reasons Lance is NOT stupid

If I have to read another INSIPID tumblr post calling him stupid by Sheith or Shallura stans who don’t like Lance because he’s silly or sassy or flirtatious and didn’t have ALL the character development like Keith had in Season 2 (aka Season Keith), I’m going to have to declare war.

1. He was accepted into an elite space exploration program.

2. See #1 and contemplate it a bit further. Consider that he’s from a large family and his personality isn’t bookish. He’s a fairly well rounded character if you consider these two points and the fact that he made it in. This ain’t ROTC. It’s the freaking GARRISON aka NASA.

3. He was accepted into a cargo pilot program. Please review requirements for even the most basic professional pilot training program. Now add SPACE.

4. He was promoted to fighter class as soon as there was an opening. He was on a WAITING list to move upwards into an even more exclusive program.

5. He is in a leadership position with Hunk and Pidge. This also shows his immaturity since he couldn’t hack it but hey he’s not perfect.

6. He is people smart. He knows what to say to get Iverson to ignore Pidge’s comments about Kerberos. He can convince Hunk to go against his excellent senses of self-preservation. He recognizes that Pidge is sensitive about Kerberos and intuited that she’s hiding a secret from the team. He overestimated his piloting skills but his commands to Hunk and Pidge were spot on. In the comics he recognizes a similarity in behavior to save the day.

And no But Nyma! doesn’t mean he’s not good with people. He can still mess up. You can be savvy with people’s behaviors and emotions and still get burned or tricked. No one. Is. Perfect. And, as we see with Lance, he is his own worst enemy and is often the cause of his own problems. He didn’t see through Nyma because he had added her to a storyline in his head. He didn’t see the situation for what it was but what he wanted it to be and Nyma, a manipulative person, used that to her advantage.

And no, not guessing Pidge’s gender isn’t a sign he’s oblivious or stupid. He tends to take people at their word, unless he has a personal issue with them, like with Keith. 

7. He is a fairly rational and logical person when he puts on his game face. Whether he’s questioning weak points of the plan in the shack or suggesting they run from the Galra to regroup and think of a better plan, he’s pragmatic and has good judgment. He defers to Shiro’s leadership regarding the wormhole even over Blue and everyone else, recognizing his experience and seniority. He sees patterns, realizes that Rover without Pidge isn’t safe, and moves to protect Coran basically off the thought that Rover alone and turning red isn’t safe.

8. Despite Keith’s comments, he was able to fly a giant magical space lion, fight off a Galra ship, fly to the edge of the solar system in just a few minutes. Without wrecking it or killing anyone. And fight off the Galra at the same time, and immediately after while covering Hunk as he retrieved the Yellow Lion.

9. He’s got fairly good spatial skills. Keith was actually wrong in the maze. And Lance was able to guide him through without injuring Keith. Sorry that last part was based off of a fanfic I read, lulz. But he was correct with blaming Keith’s directions and was able to Naruto-run and dolphin-jump to catch a coin in his TEETH!! Plus he was able to use his legs to retrieve his helmet while cuffed. Coordinated with Keith to climb up an elevator shaft. He’s fairly good at judging situations/spaces. Remember, he’s his worst enemy, so he only got hit in the head because he turned to gloat at Varkon. And while he failed against Ulaz, everyone else did too because Ulaz is an elite soldier (he didn’t give up though, he tried to pull him out of the sky even after Ulaz dodged every shot). 

10. He’s a good conversationalist. He cares about people (knitting sweaters anyone?) even if he’s only just met them. He takes people at their word (see #6) and likes to be everyone’s best friend (per his website description), joining Pidge in a quest to retrieve a game system that they can’t even play. He communicates his feelings well when he needs to and is able to support others as well as share reasonable doubts or encourage others through jokes, general silliness. He’s open to Coran, the mindlink, supports Hunk’s gassy genius ways, and even himself (S2 Ep6). He recognizes all of the team’s strengths and is open with Shiro about his feelings when he takes Keith on the mission. 

11. He’s a good shot. Period. See #7 and #9 for evidence of his spatial and situational awareness.

I’ll add more once more people have seen season 2. But yeah King Lance is not an idiot. You may not like his mannerisms but he’s no dummy.

Your mouth is like medicine

It was so much fun to write this omggggg Hope you guys like it Ari xxx 

Title: Make you feel loved -Cade

Will swears that fire hydrant was not there this morning.

There was an emergency at the hospital and as the doctor on call, he had to practically sprint there. At 5 am, when he was still half asleep, you have to cut him some slack that he didn’t notice the bright red fire hydrant.

On his lunch break, he saw a policeman writing a ticket for an idiot who parked right next to a fire hydrant. Imagine his surprise when he realized that was his car. 

“Oh fucking shit. This is just great.”, Will muttered.

He put on his best fake smile, “Officer! Hi. I’m here and I was just about to move my car. I’m a doctor at the hospital and there was an emergency. I didn’t notice the hydrant. Please, and can you just let me off with a warning?” 

“Sorry, doc. The law is the law. I’m sure though, being a doctor, you can pay off this ticket with no problem.”, the police officer raised an eyebrow at Will. 

Because Will was closer to the officer, he could now properly see the the man, and and in all of Will’s 26 years, he has never seen a man as beautiful as him. 

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