ravvitas  asked:

[pt.1] This might take a bit of explaining but, i painted a (completely sfw) picture of a frog skydiving, right? Nice and fun, light, no sexual connotation whatsoever. Posted it to pixiv, and this guy bookmarks it, gives it a 10 star rating, and comments on it. My first comment! Nice! "nice job on the webbed fingers!" he says. his name is webbed fingers. i go to his profile. My painting is the only sfw thing in his bookmarks, covered by a sea of hentai. pages and pages of hentai. i dig deeper.

[pt.2] the hentai gets progressively more and more fish related. frog related porn starts popping up. more frogs. the frogs start to stop being nsfw, and are now just distorted paintings of frog. one is a round frog with no body, just a head and legs. it’s eyes haunt me. another is a seemingly normal frog, but with hypermuscular arms, kneeling, praying. there is a picture of an octopus on a table. i stop looking and reply to his comment, saying “Thank you very much!” he later replies

[pt.3] “I sure would love to see a frog girl with webbed fingers! I’d bet she’d have cute webbed toes as well!” i don’t know what to say. he’s very nice but if i met this person in real life i would be scared. one of the frogs had a gun dave


Well then get your shit together. Get it all together. And put it in a backpack. All your shit. So it’s together. And if you gotta take it somewhere, take it somewhere, you know, take it to the shit store and sell it, or put it in a shit museum, I don’t care what you do, you just gotta get it together. Get your shit together.
—  Raphael Santiago to Magnus Bane at some point, probably.

anonymous asked:

When I was around 8/9 years old I got into rocks, and of course my parents took me to some fair about it. I don't know when or why I acquired it, but it was a tiny neon blue rock thing, p cool on its own right. Then the seller told me smth I hadn't expected; 'whatever you do, you must not lick the stone.' The same evening I sat alone in my bedroom, in the middle of the room on the floor, eyeing the box. I had to do it. Apparently it was poisonous and I had to go to the hospital.

negative consequences exist


You had been a vampire for a while now, but the time in which Valentine had captured you was the worst.
You couldn’t even say how you had managed to escape. Maybe it was luck, maybe fate, you didn’t really care. All you cared about was being back at the hotel and in front of Raphaels penthouse.

Weakly, you opened the door and walked inside. Raphael was sitting on the couch, looking devastated. But when he saw you, it seemed like he was seeing a ghost. You probably looked like one, right now or at least  more dead than alive… even more than usually…

“(Y/n)?” His voice was only a whisper.
Even as hurt as you were, you managed to smile lightly at him. “I thought I’d lost you.”

With vampire speed he was next to you in a second, holding you up.
“You think Valentine can keep me away from you, Raphael?”, you gave back with a smile.

Maybe the last few days had been the worst in your living and undead life but coming back to Raphael was worth surviving it. 

requested by @fandomsfanman
hope you like it

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Simon Lewis Headcanons, Pt. 5

Downworlder Week - Day 3 - Vampire Day

  • For a few weeks after being Turned, Simon kept forgetting he no longer needed any of the necessary things he needed to stay alive before. He pours out glasses of water, starts making coffee, or plans what he wants for dinner before realising he can’t eat or drink anymore
  • He does still try to eat or drink human food sometimes, because he’s been told that some vampires can do it. He’s never been very successful and it’s always messy
  • He has been openly pansexual since he was 16 years old. The first person he came out to was Clary and Clary helped him gain the courage to come out to his mother and sister, who were both very accepting
  • He has pansexual jokes for every occasion
  • Owns a million different shirts but only ever wears the same three
  • While Simon struggles with his vampire training, he takes to learning about the Downworld in general with flare. He asks Luke and Maia endless questions about werewolves and they are always happy to answer, he asks Raphael endless questions about vampires and various other aspects of the Downworld. Raphael is less enthusiastic about answering them all, but doesn’t have a choice

anonymous asked:

one time when i was in preschool i was like hella bros with this chick. like we were RIDE or DIE best bros. in preschool there was this super arbitrary tule that u had to take out ALLLLLLLL ur food before eating any of it. cut to day when my forgetful ass starts eating my sandwich b4 taking out my carrots. teacher comes and yells at me, i start crying meanwhile best bro is smoldering. next day, she brings matches and sets the sandbox on fire. she was expelled. i havent seen her in yrs

oh my god. holy fucking shit. oh my god

Raphael Santiago Headcanons, Pt. 5

Downworlder Week - Day 3 - Vampire Day

  • He likes taking long candle lit bubble baths while reading a book, but this is something very few people know about him
  • He always keeps a bottle of the cheap perfume his mother used to wear so he can remember her better. Occasionally he’ll wear it while visiting his elderly younger siblings in the hopes of triggering their memories too
  • He spent a long time after overthrowing Camille fixing a lot of her mistakes in the clan. He also had to figure out if any vampires were still loyal to her and were therefore a threat to him and the rest of the clan which took a long time and was a job he did not relish
  • Raphael always advises new vampires to let go of their mundane families. He never gets a very good response to this and he hates to do it - family has always been the most important thing to him - but he knows from personal experience that clinging on causes much more pain in the long-term
  • Sometimes Raphael hates being the bad guy - the guy who has to tell people to let go of their families, the guy who has to use tough love to get someone to accept that they’re a vampire now, the guy who has to make all the difficult choices. While he doesn’t care about a lot of people, he does care about his clan, and he hates having to make himself a bad person in their eyes sometimes. But he knows this is what he needs to do to help him and eventually they’ll thank him. It never gets any easier though.
  • Camille ran the clan in a very business-like manner, which Raphael dislikes. While it’s still necessary for certain vampires to have certain jobs within the clan, Raphael thinks of the clan as a family rather than a business, and he tries to make it a much more relaxed environment so the other’s will come to see it that way too