(this has been sitting in my drafts all day)

can you imagine Court players on cereal boxes like

  • kevin’s so stoked to join the ranks of wheaties athletes, he works out extra to get all buff for when the execs send his picture in to the cereal company, only for andrew to send him a photo a month later of neil holding up a box of lucky charms that has kevin standing with the leprechaun on the front of it
  • neil’s on the plain cheerios bc they asked what his favorite cereal was and he said “what’s cereal”
    • sales skyrocket
    • half those sales may or may not be matt
  • jeremy is on honey comb. jean insisted on a honey-flavored cereal bc jeremy is, like honey, naturally sweet. alvarez never lets this go and calls jeremy jean’s “honey bee” until they die
    • there is forever a box of honey comb cereal in the day-muldani household pantry. it’s never touched until the day kevin learns jean and jeremy are a couple and then he just sits in the dark shoveling it into his mouth and when it’s gone he may or may not consider eating the box just to be rid of jeremy’s face smiling at him that he can’t really see but knows is there
  • jean gets raisin bran. he doesn’t really care, thinks he’s a pretty good match for a pretty bland cereal that doesn’t get a lot of appreciation. but the thing about raisin bran is if you add a little sugar it’s actually decent
  • thea actually stole wheaties right out from under kevin. the frosted kind with her mom on the box are the only cereal amalia will eat.
  • matt asks to be on coco puffs bc they’re dan’s favorite
    • he tries to get them to put dan on cap’n crunch
  • when thea stole wheaties from kevin, they were originally going to put kevin on apple jacks. then they tried to stick allison with that special k stuff and she only agreed to it on the condition they switch kevin to lucky charms instead
  • who even all makes court
  • i don’t know anymore beyond my own headcanons
  • anyway.
  • andrew. what cereal for andrew.
  • in his picture on the box he’s scooping up cereal with his massive goalkeeper racquet like it’s a spoon
  • the deal neil had to make to get him to actually do the shoot
  • it’s hard to make andrew look not terrifying and encourage people to buy and eat the cereal. of course he isn’t smiling. his face is settled in some neutral area, he’s sporting his signature arm bands, and with his muscles bulging around the racquet spoon he just manages to pull off a convincing “eat your cereal kids”
  • the silliness of the spoon kind of counteracts the blandness of his expression
  • that and the blue cartoon toucan perched on his shoulder
  • oh yeah he’s on froot loops
  • nicky makes one (1) joke about the andrew on the box being lifesize
  • it’s so ridiculous guys
  • neil keeps a cutout though
    • it goes in his new binder. he has two. one for the foxes, and one just for andrew. he keeps it tucked inbetween a copy of that photo of them in their matching coats at the airport and the lease contract for their first shared apartment
  • just. court players on cereal boxes. dan and matt’s kids divided over whether to have aunt allison or uncle neil for breakfast (“dad you say uncle neil every time your vote doesn’t count anymore”). a little mundane thing that symbolizes their success and how far they’ve come. (“country music artists are on cereal boxes i wouldn’t be proud of that matthew” “nicky shut tf up” *kevin wailing in the background bc of lucky charms’s sugar content*)
bless the stars
keith
bless the stars

MOOD: keith’s little laugh of relief when realizing he can go to shiro’s side

this is all i need to stay alive honestly

i can’t believe it’s sheith day  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (international holiday tbh)

I don’t want Sangwoo to go to jail.

.

What most people think I mean:

He’s so HOTTT. I don’t want himmm to go to jailllll.

What I really mean:

Killing Stalking is not a superhero movie! It’s not about ‘good guys winning’ and ‘bad guys getting punished. It’s about the struggles and lives of mentally ill people and if any of the characters gets ‘eliminated’ for any reason, we won’t have Killing Stalking. This is fiction, not reality. Sangwoo is fictional and so are his victims and we’re free to be creative and I don’t see why Sangwoo has to go to jail at all just because it’s morally right in real life. There are so many possible endings for this story and ‘Sangwoo going to jail’ is the most boring, most cliche and repetitive and the most predictable ending that can happen. I want an interesting story, I’m not here to see the most interesting character in the story gets ‘eliminated’ because ‘JUSTICE’ is important in real life. With that logic, literally ALL fictional stories should end with ‘the bad guy’ going to jail and I find that tedious. We UNDERSTAND what’s morally right or isn’t in real life. But this is not real life and we’re allowed to be creative and expect an unpredictable, unique ending!

Stop treating Killing Stalking like it’s real life. Realize the difference. Don’t think your ideal ending is the morally right ending and everyone else are scum or stupid because they have different expectations. Stop judging people over fictional media ffs!!

Nicky convincing the team to go to a gay bar to celebrate before they drive back home after an away game:

  • Nicky thinks it’s the greatest idea and looks like he expects Neil to be on board
  • Allison and Renee think it’s a great idea and Matt and Dan enthusiastically jump on board
  • Kevin is indifferent at first, but then they get there and Jeremy is there so he chats him up all night
  • “Kevin, he’s hitting on you.” “No, he isn’t.” “We’re in a gay bar.” “He came with Laila and Alvarez.”
  • Guys keep staring at Kevin and hitting on Andrew and Aaron
  • Eventually Aaron hides behind Nicky and makes him play interference
  • Andrew just glares up at guys and if they don’t take the hint that he’s not interested he’ll tell them “Fuck off, I’m not interested.”
  • One guy mentions his luck that they’re twins and Andrew fucking decks him
  • Guys also approach Neil while he’s sitting at a table with Andrew
  • Neil doesn’t always realize he’s being hit on until Andrew goes all tense
  • Andrew tells them “Fuck off, he’s taken.”
  • He gets more hostile about it the more guys try it
  • At one point Andrew and Neil are supposed to be guarding the table with Dan and Aaron, but Andrew gets up to go outside for a smoke and of course Neil follows
  • They come back forty minutes later with mussed up hair and Neil’s lips look chewed up and everyone is pretty sure those are hickeys on Andrew’s neck, but they’re afraid to ask
  • Renee and Allison spend most of the night dancing together with some stops to drink and sit together
  • Matt dances with Nicky extendedly and Nicky looks so happy
  • When they’re trying to go get more drinks, guys keep trying to stop Andrew and Neil and approach them at the bar
  • So the next time they go to get another round, Andrew sticks his hand out and gives Neil a questioning look
  • Neil moves his hand even with Andrew’s, but a few inches from touching because they’ve gotten to the handholding thing with no one else around, but this is a crowded place and he wants to make sure he’s reading the signals right
  • Andrew takes Neil’s hand and guides Neil through the crowd and sometimes maneuvers them so that Neil is between him and strangers that are standing too close
2

CS AU Week : Day 2 : Crossover (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild)

After slumbering for 100 years, Killian Jones awakens to find himself in the ruined kingdom of Misthaven, which is plagued by the Darke One, an ancient evil that ravaged the land a century ago.  With no memory of these events, he travels the kingdom in hopes of recalling what had happened before falling into his deep sleep.  When his memories slowly begin to return, Killian learns of the failed attack against the Dark One, the fallen warriors who sought to defeat it, a mysterious sword with the power to seal away the Dark One forever, and the magic-wielding princess that has been holding him at bay for a century.  With her power finally weakening, Killian must find a way to destroy the Dark One before the princess, and all of Misthaven, are lost forever.

Shance Yoga Teacher au

Yes, friends, this au is 100% what you’re thinking. FLEXIBLE AF LANCE AND THIRSTY AF SHIRO

  • Starting with a bit of angst. Shiro is an ex marine (I will NEVER let go of this hc in my modern aus deal with it), who lost his hand (hand. not entire arm. just the hand) in battle. This au isn’t far in the future, so there are no fancy advanced prosthetics. The healing process was long and painful, not to mention extremely emotionally and mentally taxing.
  • Once he he’s actually healthy enough, both mentally and physically, to have enough energy for things other than treatment, the first thing he wants to do is to try and build more muscle mass, like he used to have. He liked being buff, and he still is, but less than he used to be. Both he and his therapist think it’ll be good for strengthening his positive body image, too.
  • Shiro asks his doctor (Allura) what form of exercise can she recommend at this stage, and she says Yoga. He’s skeptical at first, but what can he already lose if he goes to one session, right?
  • The hospital actually holds a class for patients, and Allura said the instructor is well experienced with amputees (amongst other conditions).
  • Shiro’s brain for the entire first minute upon meeting Lance: OH NO HE’S HOT THIS WAS A MISTAKE
  • No backing out tho he’s already been spotted and Lance is questioning him about his exact conditions so he can know best what he can safely instruct him to do and what he can’t.
  • Shiro’s brain continues to die the entire time, but he manages some answers anyway. Finally, Lance has enough, plus the rest of the group arrives and the session starts.
  • First, there’s breathing exercises. Easy enough, right?
  • WRONG
  • Lance tells them to close their eyes, but whenever Shiro does, he the only thing he has left to focus on is Lance’s voice (which is the point) and he gets super flustered because it’s so smooth? and pleasant? and kinda sexy?? and he can’t help but want that voice to whisper to him sensually and- NOPE, gotta open his eyes.
  • The rest of the class is a little harder, for two major reasons.
  • For once, the exercises are actually more demanding than he expected. He always thought he was pretty stretchy, but heavens, is a human body even supposed to bend this far?
  • Which brings us to the next difficulty. Lance’s body is more than capable of bending that far, and it’s driving him insane.
  • Despite how stressful it was trying not to stare at his ass too much and generally not turn into a tomato, the session was actually… really great. Shiro feels better when he walks out, more relaxed somehow, even though his heart still speeds up when he remembers Lance doing that one pose.
  • Lance asks him to hang back for a moment to talk to him and Shiro is all Oh No He Noticed Me Staring but nope. Lance just wanted to ask how he feels and if anything made his arm hurt really bad etc. He also excessively complimented his natural flexibility, saying he’ll be able to do “all sorts of things” soon enough. Shiro is really unsure, but it almost seems like Lance smirked while saying that? Nah, he must be just imagining things because of his developing crush.
  • The next few sessions aren’t very different. Supposedly, anyway. After basing his level and current capabilities, Lance decided that Shiro could use more personal guidance, including LOTS of touching to correct his pose. Lance, being a professional, always asks for permission to touch him first, which somehow only makes it that much worse, because Shiro wants Lance to touch him. So so bad. Shiro is literally dying. These pants are tight and they will not hide a boner. He’s suffering. Someone help him.
  • There’s no help, and Poor Shiro has to constantly deal with gentle touches and low purrs because god forbid anyone makes a loud noise in the middle of yoga class. It goes on for a couple of weeks until one day he gets a most peculiar text from Lance.
  • (They exchanged numbers because Shiro wanted to add a third yoga session to his weekly schedule but the hospital only held the classes twice a week, and Lance gives him his number in case he has any questions. Of course, barely any Yoga advice was exchanged. )
  • Lance’s text: Uggghhh I can’t do this anymore! Allura, I know he’s your patient and all and he’s “”“"healing”“”“ and stuff but I can’t hold back anymore I just can’t. He’s too hot. I know I promised to hold back BUT THIS IS IT I’M ASKING HIM OUT
  • Shaking, Shiro texts back, asking who Lance is talking about.
  • Lance doesn’t text back for like half an hour and Shiro starts seriously freaking out when he gets a long ass text from Lance, where he apologizes for being so unprofessional and confessing his crush etc.
  • Shiro could almost cry from relief, because a few minutes ago he thought he might’ve lost all chances with Lance but now… He has more than a slight chance. He calls Lance and confesses his own crush and they both laugh and maybe it’s a little awkward because what do you even say in a situation like this but eventually they manage to schedule a date.
  • They take it slow, let things develop naturally. Lance gives Shiro all the time and space he needs, since it’s the first time he’s tried dating since he lost his hand. Takes a little trial and error, but one day, a few months later, Shiro finds out just how far Lance can bend.
A Lesson in Servitude

‘He knows he’s enjoying this way too much’

Featuring: Taehyung/V
Genre: Smut (semi public)
Word Count: 2k

m.list

A/n: I really want to suck on Taehyung’s fingers :/ This has been sitting in my drafts since like June.


He was so poised. Dark eyes pointedly scrutinizing everything in his wake. He was the first born into the Park family but would never be the first in line for the throne.

There were constant whispers and gossip floating around the castle about how the illegitimate child of the king was much more suited to the throne than his brother Jimin who only seemed interested in playing all day long.

That didn’t dissuade Taehyung’s faith in his brother’s capability to be a noble ruler. Plus with his ineligibility to lead his kingdom, he was able to get away with more. The spotlight had inevitably shied away from him, leaving him to venture out into less than suitable situations.

Situations involving a certain servant. He was always sure to keep you at arm’s length. Nods of acknowledgement were just a pleasantry he offered all of staff, so you never thought anything of it, until he propositioned you.

He explained to you how he only kept concubines out of ‘spite for his betrothed’, and felt it more beneficial to ‘fool around with someone not so dirtied by the hands of other men,’ his words not yours. Thus this arrangement was formed, although who would you be to deny a close associate of the Park family.

He had a limited amount of time, before people would start to grow suspicious of his absence. Seeing as this was a gathering to welcome his potential in laws.

It was suffocating, being met with empathetic smiles. His head was growing weary with all the clinking of glasses and buzzing of too many voices. A blur of people coming up to him with faux congratulations on getting engaged to a she demon. He needed a break from the glitz, needed to get away from that room full of phonies.

One glance your way from across the ballroom had you scurrying to excuse yourself to the head maiden, addressing how lightheaded you’d been feeling tonight. She let you out for a walk, not without a disgruntled huff coming from her lips before shooing you away.

“Your majesty?” You step out into the dimly lit lanai looking around for the noblemen, suddenly swept off your feet by long limbs.

“Look, who came running to check on her master, how cute.” He pushes you against the cobblestone wall, pressing his chest into your back.

“W-well of course, I wanted to make sure you were feeling a-alright.”

“Is that the only reason you came out here?” If you hadn’t known any better you would have thought he was hurt by your cover up but the teasing lilt in his voice says otherwise.

“___, you don’t have to save face around me. I won’t judge.” He pushes you further into the wall until your cheek is pressed against the cool stone and you squeal out at the tight space you’ve found yourself in.

He pulls off your bonnet, flinging it to the ground, watching in mild fascination as your silky tresses fall down your back. He moves them to the side to gain access to the supple skin of your neck.

“You’re..so…fun…to…tease.” He accentuates every word with a kiss to your neck, sending chills down your spine.

His hands idly slide down to the hem of your dress, pulling up the fabric to reveal your ivory slip. Your legs are squeezed together in fear of letting him move forward in such a communal area of the castle, especially where stray guests and guards making their rounds always roamed.

“Open.” His voice is firm, authoritative, and you spread your legs at his command.

No one would ever believe you if you told them that Taehyung’s hand was palming you over your slip in earnest. Working you up like he had done so many times before, with such ease.

You’re lips release a shamelessly loud whimper, earning a pleased chuckle from Taehyung. “Baby, do you want me to pump my fingers into you?”

“Y-yes, your majesty.”

Taehyung slips a hand into the elastic of your cotton slip, middle finger brushing up your wet slit. He rubs along your lips until he feels the tell tale clenching and unclenching of your thighs around his playful hand and decides to give you what you want. What you’d been denying yourself of all night.

He delves his middle finger into your center, slowly sliding in all the way to the knuckle. Describing your pussy as wet would be an injustice. His finger felt like it was drowning and in order to stay afloat he’d have to clutch onto your warm walls, which is exactly what he did.

He curls his experienced finger into your heat. The friction having your nails dig into the overgrown foliage decorating the castle walls.

His finger pumps into you with skilled precision, palm grinding into your clit with each ministration. Your mouth is gaping, inaudible moans leaving your throat.

Taehyung sucks in a breath, completely enraptured by your body’s response to his touch. He decides to up the ante. “If you want more, all you have to do is ask.”

“Y-your majesty please…” your voice falls flat at the feeling of his other hand coming up to grip your clothed breast. Your eyes shut at the added sensation, nipples growing painfully taut.

“I can’t hear you ___.”

“P-please your highness, I need more.”

He lets out a hum in satisfaction over your desperate plea, sinking a second finger into you, this time with much more force. He didn’t even wait for you to adjust to the stretch before he was thrusting both fingers synonymously inside of your weeping cunt.

Every noise that leaves your mouth fuels Taehyung’s lust, further contributing to the ever growing bulge in his trousers. You yourself were too far gone to notice the subtle frotting he administered to your backside.

“Are you close my love?” His voice was disgustingly sweet against your ear, adding a nibble for good measure.

You nod against him and he takes this as his sign to let loose on you all the pent up desire he’s been repressing for the past twelve hours of not being able to touch you.

His fingers plunge into your pussy at a tempo that fell into sync with Offenbach’s Can Can playing inside the ballroom. He kept up the assault of his fingers with a consistency only he knew how to execute.

Your walls clench around his fingers spasmodically, rippling through your nerves in strong waves. Your knees buckle from the force of your first orgasm. You’d be on the ground, a crumpled mess, had Taehyung not been there to keep you braced against the wall.

His fingers rest inside of you, until the last few quakes of your thighs come to complete stop, and he slips from your slick folds, removing his hand from under your dress. Your forehead rests against the brick, too exhausted to hold your head up.

When you finally regain enough energy to raise your head once again you are met with Taehyung slick fingers in front of your face. They are close enough for you to get a whiff of the pungent smell and you turn your head away out of embarrassment.

This action doesn’t discourage Taehyung from pushing his digits past your plump lips and into your mouth. The taste of yourself hits your tongue in a flurry of bitterness. You’d never have thought to taste yourself before and it’s oddly enticing.

His fingers swirl around inside your mouth, willing your tongue to move around his digits. No one would believe your tales of his insistence for you to suck hungrily on his fingers, only after he’d assaulted your dripping pussy. They’d probably have you beheaded at the first sound of your deluded accusations.

“You don’t want me to go back in there dirty do you?”

“No.” you muffle out, mouth full of his fingers.

“Then finish cleaning me up.”

You hum out in understanding, slurping along the length of his fingers. You thoroughly slurp up every last drop, until there is only a hint of your essence on him.

Taehyung groans out at the feel of your sloppy tongue working hard to clean him off. He became painfully aware of just how hard you had made him and snapped his hips into your clothed ass.

You look up to him through your lashes in complete shock, you’d both been out here for quite sometime and people were bound to start looking for the pair of you if they hadn’t started already.

“What did you expect, sucking on my fingers so erotically.” He ruts his hardness into your backside, pulling you back onto him harshly.

“Y-your majesty, you should g-get back to the party and tend to your guests.”

“I’d much rather tend to you my lady.” He rubs at your bottom through your dress, reaching down to flip the fabric over your back to reveal the curve of your ass. Your legs tremble at the cool air greeting your searing core.

You hear the rustling of clothes behind you feeling Taehyung’s knees fitting into the backs of your own as he tries to position himself. You feel the head of his cock rub against your folds, tickling your swollen clit.

He slides in with ease, welcoming the surge of warmth with a low rumbling groan. He pulls back, leaving just the head in before plunging himself into the hilt. If anyone heard your choked sob at the abrupt intrusion, they didn’t bother coming to check on the noise.

Taehyung rams into you with a force that has you standing on the tips of your toes. “Lift your leg up for me.” He breathes out, helping you adjust your position.

His hips piston into you at an angle that has broken sobs leaving your mouth. You dig your nails into the wall, not caring how damaging it was to your nail beds because the way his cock drove into you was just too good for you to care.

With each buck of his hips you are quickly nearing your second end. He knows he’s enjoying this way too much. Your complete servitude to him, how simple it is to pull submission from your deepest depths. He loves every minute of fucking you any and everywhere he sees fit and sees the slight obsession to overpower you unhealthy. But that doesn’t deter what he’s gaining from this. You give him forbidden pleasure, a thrill he can only find between your legs.

“Y-your majesty, I-I’m so close.” A mewl interrupting your declaration.

Taehyung begins to fuck you into the wall at full force, not saving a drop of energy for anything else but to have you cumming.

With each thrust he is met with a moan louder than the one before and he’s content with his handy work. Not even a second later you are cumming around his pulsating cock in a sloppy rhythm that’d undoubtedly disappoint Taehyung’s piano teacher.

When he feels the coil in his belly begin to unravel he pulls out of you. Taehyung jerks himself onto your uniform, the ivory rivulets from his release contrasting against the black of your uniform.

He is left panting behind you, leaning his head against your back. The aftershocks of your orgasms rock through both of your bodies in strong tremors. The aftermath of your rendezvous is spent in silence, the only sound being ruffling of cloth and the clinking of his belt buckle. You try to sober up as well, figuring your long absence will result in you having kitchen cleanup for the next 6 weeks.

“Come up to my room later. I want to play with you properly.” He whispers out into your ear before heading back inside the grand patio doors. You know for a fact Kim Taehyung always gets what he wants and if you aren’t knocking on his door at 12:00 am you were going to reap the retribution.

gajevy-trainwreck  asked:

Ohhh could you do one where the RFA + V + Saeran switch bodies with MC for a day please? I really enjoy your writing! :D

Sorry for the delay with this one! This submit has been sitting in my inbox for awhile now and I apologize. There’s been a series of mishaps, such as me finally finishing this imagine and my internet shutting off. Or my drafts just magically not saving. All of which sucks because this request is so fun!^^

I also apologize if this is too long for your liking.

Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy it~!

Zen

  • you woke up cuddling with zen in his bed
  • you were the big spoon???? how is he fit so snuggly against you like this??? Why he so smol???
  • your eyes open in panic
  • “WHY AM I CUDDLING ME” you scream “WHY IS MY VOICE SO DEEP” you scream again
  • the MC that you were snuggling with opens their eyes in panic when they hear you scream
  • “WHY ARE YOU ME?” they scream, then clamp their hands around their own mouth once they hear their own voice
  • You get up and run to the bathroom to look in the mirror
  • White hair, red eyes, gorgeous looks
  • “I’M ZEN!” you yell
  • you hear running and suddenly the MC from before is right next to you, also staring into the mirror
  • “I’M MC!” they yell
  • you both look at eachother “I’M YOU!”
  • *cue panicking in the bathroom for like 2 hours*
  • when you both finally calm down, you’re sitting on the floor with your backs pressed up against the walls
  • MC/Zen speaks up first, “MC?”
  • “Yeah, Zen?”
  • “Can I just say that you look absolutely beautiful today?” He winks.
  • You giggle, “Oh thank you! I’ve been working out!” You lift your/his shirt up to show off your/his toned abs.
  • You spend the next hour making jokes of the similar caliber
  • While laughing, you go to run your hands through your/his hair and are greeted with a long silky ponytail
  • A devious smirk crosses your face as you think of a joke
  • “Zen?”
  • “Yes, MC?”
  • “What would you do if I were to…” You slowly stand up. He/you looks uneasy.
  • “…cUT OFF YOUR PONYTAIL” you take off running toward the kitchen where you know a pair of scissors is
  • he’s screaming pleads and chasing you

Yoosung

  • baby wakes up next to your warm body and decides to go make breakfast for the both of you
  • he goes in the kitchen and makes omurice (which i highly recommend that shit is GOOD)
  • once it is plated he sets the two dishes onto the counter and goes to wake you up
  • but…wHY IS HE STILL ASLEEP IN BED??
  • HAD HIS SOUL LEFT HIS BODY TO GO MAKE OMURICE??
  • the other Yoosung stirs and slowly wakes up
  • they make eye contact
  • and sCREAM
  • “ARE YOU ME??”
  • Both confused. both screaming. both end up hugging each other for comfort.
  • while crying he gets a glance of himself in the bedside mirror
  • he sniffles “Oh…I’m so cute…”
  • “Me too!” you dramatically cry.
  • “Thanks, honey.”
  • “Thank you too, honey.”
  • you calm down and try to make it through the day
  • the blind belief that this will all be sorted out in the morning was the only thing driving you
  • thank the stars that it was a weekend and neither of you had anything planned.
  • you both eat breakfast and chat, still getting used to your new bodies
  • after a bit of settling down, you get notification from a guild member requesting your assistance in LOLOL
  • Yoosung tells you that you need to play for him
  • and omg
  • you suck
  • the guild members are yelling and asking you if you are alright
  • Yoosung needs to take over before you destroy his ranking
  • Everyone hoots and hollers at the girl in the voice chat and Yoosung is pissed
  • Why can’t he be a girl and play without being harassed
  • Makes a mental note to scold the men in his guild once this is over

Jaehee

  • she wakes up next to you
  • immediately sees that she was sleeping with herself??
  • silently panicking
  • checks a mirror to see if she’s a ghost or something
  • she’s you??
  • you’re her??
  • silently panics harder
  • shakes you awake
  • “MC, something is wrong.” Her voice comes out fast and urgent.
  • You immediately see that she is you
  • “WHAT.”
  • “MC, I have work today! I can’t go into the office like this! You don’t work there! And there’s no way Mr. Han will give me a day off!”
  • You realize what you are going to have to do
  • You start silently panicking
  • she helps you slip into work clothes and heels
  • you wink at yourself in the mirror and put up finger guns
  • “None of that. I would never do that.” She scolds with a smile.
  • “Yes, ma’am.” You salute
  • “I wouldn’t salute either.”
  • “Yes, ma’am.” No salute this time.
  • Once you get to C&R, a crushing anxiety hits you
  • you walk in, heart pounding
  • you find you desk and sit down
  • there are sticky notes everywhere with reminders of what you need to get finished
  • and people keep coming by your desk to glare at you and give you more work
  • it’s hell
  • you don’t even know the password to her computer
  • you give up and just start throwing office supplies at your co-workers when they have their backs turned
  • it was fun for about an hour until THE Jumin Han catches you
  • he leads you to his office
  • P AN I C
  • he sits down at his chair behind the desk
  • “Care to explain.”
  • “Uhhhh, Jumin-I MEAN- Mr. Han.”
  • fukin nailed it
  • “You are acting quite strange today, Assistant Kang.”
  • “N-No, I’m not!”
  • He raises an eyebrow and you feel your face go warm in embarrassment
  • You cough. “Sorry, sir.”
  • “Care to explain yourself?”
  • You don’t know how to respond.
  • “I could fire you for this. You have done nothing productive all day and have even interfered with the productivity of other employees,”
  • You’re freaking out. You can’t be the reason Jaehee loses her job!
  • he continues, “furthermore-”
  • “JUMIN WAIT!”
  • he looks taken aback, “Assistant Kang-”
  • “I’m not Jaehee!”
  • it takes A LOT of convincing but he finally gives you a ‘sick day’ until this is all cleared up.
  • you go home and collapse into Jaehee’s arms
  • she works so much
  • you’re glad that she at least got to sit at home and do nothing in your body

Jumin

  • he’s mentally freaking the fuck out when he first sees you sleeping in his body
  • keeps calm and emails the correct people to tell them that he can’t come to work today
  • you wake up to the smell of strawberry pancakes
  • you follow the scent to the kitchen
  • wHY ARE YOU MAKING STRAWBERRY PANCAKES
  • you let out a little shriek and the MC making pancakes jumps a little
  • You hear them inform you of a little mishap
  • it’s weird to hear your own voice sound so formal
  • “Jumin.”
  • “Yes, MC?”
  • “I’m in your body.”
  • “yes, it appears so.”
  • YOU DAB VIOLENTLY
  • HE LOOKS LIKE YOU JUST INSULTED EVERYTHING HE STANDS FOR
  • The rest of the day is you just breaking his character
  • You call the chef
  • they pick up and ask you what you would like
  • “Is our company’s refrigerator running?” you ask, making sure your voice sounded deep and stoic
  • “Yes, sir.”
  • “Hmm, you better go catch it.”
  • Before the chef can even respond, you start laughing like a school girl and you hang up
  • You go into the chatroom
  • SHITPOST
  • You text Zen:
  • you: I LOVE YOU ZEN
  • zen: ??????
  • you: I. LOVE. YOU.
  • zen: wtf????? ew????
  • you: I LOVE YOU MORE THAN CATS
  • zen: aren’t you with MC????
  • you: IT WAS ALL A LIE TO MAKE YOU JEALOUS
  • zen has left the chatroom
  • Jumin can’t tell if this is the worst day of his life (his image is destroyed) or the best day (he’s been staring at himself in the mirror all day. you can’t leave him if he is you)

707

  • you wake up to loud screaming
  • “FREAKY FRIDAYYYYYYYYYY!!!!”
  • “Luce, what the hell?”
  • then you open your eyes
  • to meet…your own eyes??
  • “WE SWITCHED BODIES. DON’T ASK QUESTIONS, JUST ENJOY IT.”
  • You look around the room…well…you try
  • “I CAN’T SEE!” You panic.
  • “Oh, here!” He puts his glasses on you.
  • “Oh, hey gorgeous.” You wink.
  • “Hey~” he bats his eyelashes
  • “So what happened?” you ask, sitting up.
  • “We switched bodies. I don’t know how or why.”
  • “Oh cool. It’s like a filler episode, right?”
  • “Yeah.”
  • You study him/you
  • he seems to be also studying his own body
  • he starts by touching his/your face, feeling your features
  • then he touches your hair, “Hmm, soft.” he mumbled
  • then he pulls the blanket off of his legs and trails his hands up and down them. then to your arms.
  • he drops back down to your hips and trails him hands up, resting them on his breasts.
  • he squeezes
  • he squeezes again
  • hE KEEPS SQUEEZING
  • “SEVEN!”
  • he looks at you innocently, hands still cupping boobs
  • You gesture to his hands.
  • “Hey, you can touch whatever you want on me, deal?”
  • “Okay, deal.”
  • You run your hands over his body a couple times
  • You get bored pretty quickly
  • You gasp, “CAN I TRY ON YOUR OUTFITS?”
  • He gasps, “CAN I TRY ON YOURS?”
  • “YEAH.”
  • “THEN YEAH!”
  • “AWWW YEAHHHHHHH” He runs over to your closet and immediately starts making outfits
  • You do the same.
  • You both try them all on and strut around.
  • fucking nerdssss

V

  • You wake up in the morning and stretch
  • you open your eyes
  • “V, HELP, I CAN’T SEE!”
  • V wakes up to your screaming
  • immediately turns to the source of your screaming
  • is shocked to see everything so clear and bright
  • he sees himself/you looking around frantically
  • how was he looking at himself, and how was he looking??
  • “Calm down!”
  • You turn towards the sound of your own voice
  • “Is that you, MC?” he asks, trying his best to keep calm.
  • “Y-yeah?”
  • You cannot see anything out of one eye, and the other only supplied you with a huge blurry mass
  • but you could see colors
  • and the person talking to you did not have the same colored hair as V
  • they actually had the same colored hair as you
  • “Is that you, V?”
  • He hums a yes, “I think we are not in our correct bodies”
  • You take a moment to process this, you suddenly get really excited
  • “Wait…so you can see!?”
  • he matched your excitement
  • “Yes, everything is clear!”
  • You heard him take a sharp intake of breath
  • “I’m going to go look at you.” and with that you could feel him get out of bed and almost run to a mirror
  • it took longer than a look in the mirror usually should
  • but that boy was trying to memorize every detail of your face
  • deep down he knew this wasn’t going to last, so this would be his first and last time seeing you
  • when he hears you calling him, he hesitantly looks away from the mirror and goes back to you
  • “You’re beautiful.” He greets.
  • You blush, “V, let’s go everywhere we can! You need to see things!”
  • He helps you out of the house
  • You go to the park, stare at the sky, and feed the birds
  • V takes the prettiest pictures
  • You even call 707 to give you a ride to the   b e a c h
  • he stares out the window the whole time
  • He watches the ocean and observes the tiny granules of sand
  • throughout the trip he cannot stop looking at himself in reflections and his phone camera
  • takes so many selfies in your body
  • the nicest selfies
  • better than any selfie you’ve ever taken
  • he sees so many pretty things that day, but he thinks that you were the prettiest by far

Saeran

  • you wake up to see yourself staring at you with wide eyes
  • he is not saying anything
  • “I’m you.”
  • he says nothing
  • “And you’re me.”
  • still silent
  • you cannot tell if he’s calm
  • or just silently freaking out
  • he is expressionless in your body
  • you, however, are having a great time taking as many selfies on your own phone as possible
  • smiling pics of Saeran, fuck yeah
  • he keeps playing with his hair
  • “It’s so soft.” he mumbles.
  • is constantly brushing it
  • “so pretty.” he whispers to himself when looking in a mirror
  • he feels so fragile he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt you so he tries his best to stay still
  • keeps gently touching your face
  • he just sits somewhere and makes a bunch of facial expressions just to know what it feels like when you make them. just imagine him scrunching up your face and smiling and just trying to make faces that he’s seen you do
  • you haven’t mastered the art of bitch facing like Saeran
  • everytime you look in the mirror to imitate his glare, you just start giggling at how cute you look
  • you’re both too cute
they say the crown is always heavy but i wonder if they truly know:
how it wears you down like a stone around your neck and leaves you begging for a gulp of air. how it snaps your wings and reins you in, how it takes and takes from you like the most experienced of thieves.
and i wonder if they’ll ever see what the crown really took from me:
my love, my heart, my freedom, whipping past me like the ocean breeze i’m not allowed to get in touch with anymore;
and yet how grateful i am still —
for the countless hungry strangers that try to rob me of this newfound glory i did not ask for, and how they try to decorate their precious crown with the jewels they’ll readily steal from my very veins, red and rich like rubies.
but most of all, i wonder if they realize:
each scar, each fat drop of blood, each tear is a new day their sharpened knives and monstrous teeth have missed my lifeline.

and the crown is still not theirs.
—  long live the king / nikolai 
Bts reaction to you dressing sexy:

Anon requested: Can u do a bts reaction of their s/o always dressing modest, but one date night they decide to wear a tight, lace up front dress or something? Lol this is really specific sorry!

This one has been sitting in my drafts for so long I am so sorry of the person who requested this. Here you go ~
———

Jin:

Originally posted by ofzico

At first, when you showed up in that flashy dress, a smile lit up his face, and he pulled you in for a soft kiss. He will be so mesmerise by your beauty that he can’t help but smile all night.

Suga:

Originally posted by markjin

It wasn’t about the exposed skin or anything, it’s about the fact that he discovers how beautiful you are each day. Yoongi is going to stay quite all day, just hearing you speak and looking at you as if you are a precious pearl.

Jhope:

Originally posted by jjilljj

Shameless love. I bet you he is going to spin you around like show me what you got girl and why don’t you show me that more often and ugh you are going to spend the entire day blushing over his never ending compliments.

Rap monster:

Originally posted by sugutie

It made him fall in love with you more. The way you keep yourself modest and down to earth. But when you try to spice it up, you blow his mind and leave his jaw open. Really it just makes him realise how much you are precious to him.

Jimin:

Originally posted by sweaterpawsjimin

He bit his lip when he saw you coming his way in that dress. Kissing your lips furiously to keep any intruding men away from your sexy figure, he lustfully whispered in your ear, “why do you have to show the world too”. He will stay quite all evening, interrupting your speech to drop one or two sexy comments.

V/Taehyung:

Originally posted by taetaehyungs

You wouldn’t have doubted yourself if he didn’t gasp so dramatically. You’ll shrug cutely like do you like it? And he is going to pull you in, kissing your face like are you kidding me I love it.

Jungkook:

Originally posted by apgujeon

Ah this boy. At first he seemed like he didn’t care, casually taking your hands, but when you are not looking, he is staring at you with so much love like he can’t believe how lucky he is. He will wrap an arm around your waist to keep off any hungry eyes off you. Taking tons of selfies and pictures of you so he can keep it as his screensaver.
IN AMIDST OF A WAR [GEORGE WEASLEY]

summary: they were best friends, like siblings as they often tell the others, but just as the battle of hogwarts is taking place, one of them decides that it’s the best time to confess certain feelings — not exactly the right moment when you may or may not face death while protecting the castle.

a/n: fRED DOESN’T DIE HERE BECAUSE I SAID SO OKAY. oh and this is a bit cliche but meh, i’m a sucker for cliche and fluffy stories lol (and my writing here isn’t the best, i’m sorry 😂)

also this has been sitting on my drafts for a long time and i finally decided to finish it since classes are suspended from where i’m from ahaha.

Masterlist

Keep reading

You can do what you want, but remember that people talk.

I happened to hear a phone call recently, and I will give this cast of characters names to make it easier to share with you. Mary and Elaine are friends who work in the same industry. Roger used to work with Elaine, and is now seeking employment with Mary.

Mary knows Elaine may have worked with Roger, and she also knows that Elaine has a great understanding of their industry and is really good at analyzing the strengths and weaknesses of her coworkers. So Mary calls Elaine and asks her, “What do you think of Roger? Would you hire him?”

Not only is the answer no, the answer is filled with stories of Roger’s incompetence on every level. It’s already clear that Roger isn’t going to get the job, but when Elaine mentions, “Yeah, and Roger was honestly just really mean to me the whole time we worked together.” the final nail is in the coffin.

Sorry Roger, better luck next time? Try not being such a douche, I guess.

But I realized, as I shamelessly eavesdropped on this call, that these calls happen all the time. They happen between former coworkers. They happen between old friends and neighbors. They happen in IMs between tumblr users.

Roger will probably never know that call happened, and perhaps he should have assumed it would. But maybe nobody told him: people talk.

No Other Men Like Me

Original imagine:  Imagine possessive!Dean when you’re flirting with the bartender to get info for a hunt written for @aprofoundbondwithdean. This is also #35 public sex/semi-public sex, (specifically semi-public) requested by an anonymous requester for my Follower Appreciation Day Drabbles from the 100 Kinks List.

Author: Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Dean Winchester x female reader

Word Count: 2586

Warnings: Explicit language, nsfw, explicit sexual content, smut, unprotected sex

Author’s Note: This has been sitting in my draft folder for a while. I wanted to write something for Kale, because she does so much for the authors in the fandom. This one is for you and all the things you do for us. xoxoxo

Tagging: @spnfanficpond  @jensennjared @mrswhozeewhatsis @the-mrs-deanwinchester @official-shipper @balthazars-muse @brooklyn-writes-flangst @climbthatmooselikeatree @mamapeterson @rizlow1 @eyes-of-a-disney-princess @winchesterenthusiast @salvachester @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @katnharper

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So you guys might be wondering why I haven’t been posting as frequently as before… and that’s because…

There’s a Baby Onion Ninja on the way!

So yes, I have been having terrible morning sickness all the way into the third trimester (my hospitalization earlier this year was partly due to it and around when I first found out), and one of the triggers for it has been the smell of cooking oil, which meant no cooking.

I’m slowly getting slightly better, so I’ve been able to do some cooking, and there’s a fall-related recipe sitting in the drafts folder right now, and it’ll be up in half a day! But for now, updates are going to be sporadic. (And of course you’ll have to wait a few years before I can do Amaama to Inazuma stuff with Baby Onion Ninja. )

Of course, I hope Baby Onion Ninja won’t be as picky as Nakiri Erina, the baby in the pic. Anime: Shokugeki no Soma, pic from google.

Fanfic - Lazy Sunday - 1/1

Summary: Barry and Iris spend a lazy (and romantic) Sunday in bed together all day. 

Rating: PG

Word Count: 1721

A/N: This has been sitting in my drafts for months so decided to share with everyone. 

Barry can hear birds chirping outside his window when he opens his eyes. The sky outside his window is swirls of soft pink and purple as the sun began to wash away the night. He turned his gaze away from the coming dawn to look across the bed to where Iris was sleeping.

To Barry there wasn’t a moment when he didn’t think Iris wasn’t the most beautiful woman in the world. She always took his breath whether she wore her old sweats or silk dresses. But right now she never looked more beautiful to him.

The white sheets twisted around her petite body giving him glimpses of her naked body underneath. Her brown skin looking soft to the touch in the early light of morning. Her face relaxed in sleep with her full lips slightly parted. Looking at her made something ache in Barry’s chest. He couldn’t help inching closer to her. An invisible pull that always existed between them. His hand reached out to gently curl around her cheek. His head tilting to brush his lips against hers.

Iris shifted closer to his touch. A smile pulling at her lips when Barry leaned in to press another kiss.

Keep reading

An Unusual Hobby

Ok, so this has been sitting in my drafts for a while, a plot bunny born from pure silliness! <3

Fic Master List :)


An Unusual Hobby.


 The house still rang with the laughter of their family as Claire and Jamie made their way to bed. Jamie as usual was doing the rounds, making sure every window and door was bolted for the night, Claire slowly following close by. He’d been everyone else’s tonight; his sister’s to playfully argue with, his daughters to spoil, his sons to discuss day to day life on the Ridge. Even the grandchildren all wanted some time with their grandda. Now Claire was loathe to spend any time apart. She loved - as he did, she knew - seeing him surrounded, smothered by them all, but now, he was hers alone to do with as she pleased; she missed her husband - not that he gave her much time to indeed miss him that much.

They’d all decided to spend the night at Young Ian’s cabin, with Fergus and Marsali’s visit coming to an end soon, they wanted to keep the night’s festive atmosphere going, and the kids were all still fizzing with unrestrained energy. So the big house finally stood silent, and Claire and Jamie’s for the night. Jamie finished checking the window in his study - the only light that of the solitary candle Claire’d been holding - he noticed Bree’s journal on his desk.

“Och, the lass’s gone and forgotten her wee book. Shall I bring it to her, d’ye think? I’m sure they havena gone far yet,” he said, grabbing it off the desk. As he did, a few pages fell to the floor.

“Not to worry,” Claire said, swooping down to pick them up. “They’ll be back up here tomorrow.” She noticed the handwriting on one of the sheets wasn’t Bree’s, but Marsali’s.

Dearest good-sister,’ it began. Quickly scanning the sheet, Claire was struck by the informality of it. Unable to stop herself, she read on more precisely.

Dearest good-sister,

 I’ve been most taken by the conversation we shared last week in regards to the many books you’ve read, with which you described in such vivid and fervent detail. So overcome indeed, I haven’t been able to think of much else! I have been taken over by a most provoking muse and the urge to write has been most powerful. So, last night, after I had put the children to bed and Fergus had long fallen asleep, I stole out of bed and wrote a wee something for you. Mayhaps it will harken back to some of the novels you spoke of.

Yours with love,

Your good-sister, Marsali.

Post-script: To say this is for your eyes alone would be a most gross understatement!

Claire stood transfixed. She’d been so absorbed, in fact, she hadn’t heard Jamie speak till he gently put a hand on her shoulder.

“Is something amiss, Sassenach?” he asked tentatively.

“No, not at all. Just… curious,” she said distracted, as she flipped to the next sheet.

“Ye shouldna be reading that! They are Bree’s private thoughts, no?” Jamie said, but she could sense his curiosity had been piqued by her own.

“It’s something Marsali’s written, I’m just wondering what could have been so—oh…”

“Oh?” Jamie tried reading the sheet in her hand over her shoulder, but she immediately folded it.

“It’s nothing!” she said hastily, hoping he couldn’t see her flush in the candlelight. But, as always, he was too tuned to her that he needn’t have looked at her glass face at all. Still holding the candle, she tried to stuff the letters back into the journal one handed, but Jamie, taking advantage of her awkward grip, snatched them faster than she could have imagined.

“No! Jamie, you can’t read that! Honestly, its most private,” she helplessly exclaimed. But he’d already read the first sheet and had flipped to the second before she’d finished speaking. 

“If ye didna want me reading it, ye shouldna ha’—oh!”

“Oh,” she replied dryly.

Even in the dim light she could see the blush rising under his collar, the tips of his ears flaming. She knew he’d read stories like this before, but was sure the shock came not from the words, but from the author. His moment of disbelief was enough distraction for Claire to snatch the sheets back - well there was no going back now, she thought, might as well finish it. She began reading out loud, amused, much to Jamie’s discomfort.

 Mr. Darcy stole from his chamber, having given up any attempts of getting any sleep. He was restless. He was irritable. And he burned most fiercely. His thoughts of Elizabeth filled him with fire and he roamed aimlessly through the cold, dreary halls, trying to quench his fiery need, yet knew there was but one cure.

He found himself outside Elizabeth’s door, the soft light of her candle visible beneath the crack of her door…

 And so Claire read on as Mr. Darcy uncontrollably slipped into Elizabeth’s bedroom to find her in nothing but shift, hair loose, cheeks flushed at the appearance of her midnight visitor.

…Elizabeth felt the heat rise within her, her nether regions tingling pleasantly at the thought of Mr. Darcy undressing her further with his eyes. His member twitching in his breeches in greeting. She played such coquettish games, moving from bed to dresser, just out of reach, Mr. Darcy all the while moving in earnest towards her, finally forcing her to vault over the bed to the window-

Jamie snorted at that particularly acrobatic bit; Claire ignored him and read on.

-The room filled with the musky smell of arousal, both Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy sensing the change in the air. There was no going back from that point.

“I burn for you most ardently,” Mr. Darcy gasped, undoing the fly of his breeches, his member strained for freedom, demanding attention.

Elizabeth felt dizzy, the unaccustomed rush of arousal weakening her knees. The secret space between her legs engorged and slippery. A flush rose in her cheeks as she stared at Mr. Darcy, naked and ready before her, awaiting her acquiescence.

She moved, hypnotized, toward the armchair by the window. She settled back, unable to take her eyes from him, lest he suddenly disappeared, fearing this being naught but a dream. “How long I’ve desired you, Mr. Darcy? How long I’ve yearned to feel your lips against those secret parts of me,” Elizabeth whispered. She rucked up her shift, exposing her hidden lust, draping her legs up onto the armrests, opening herself to him.

Mr. Darcy breath caught in his throat, seeing her exposed so. Ready. Waiting. He stepped forward, seeing the muscles of her inner thighs tremble in anticipation. He fell to his knees before her, hands tracing her legs. His mouth was dry and he licked his lips, his breath shallow. “A taste first,” he said, bringing his mouth to her nether region. “I must!”

Elizabeth felt his tongue-

 “You’ve got to be bloody kidding me! It just stops! Is there another page?” Claire asked, Jamie at once already searching the floor for the next part. Clearly he’d been just as carried away as she’d been. “Nay, I dinna see another!”

“Perhaps in the journal?” she suggested, but a quick investigation yielded nothing. “She can’t have sent it incomplete, surely?” Claire said exasperated.

“I dinna ken,” Jamie shrugged, “but I must say, yon girl has quite a way wi’ words, aye,” he cocked a suggestive eyebrow at Claire that went straight through her nether regions, sending shivers down her spine.

“She most certainly does,” she replied primly, tucking the sheets of paper neatly back into the journal, avoiding his gaze entirely.

He came up behind her, wrapping his arms about her waist. “D’ye maybe think it’s things she’s-” he stopped abruptly, the thought having gone a wee bit further than he would’ve liked.

“No,” Claire said firmly. “Besides, I hardly want the imagery of Fergus and Marsali quite in that way.” The thought of Fergus and Marsali’s encounters weren’t really something either one wanted to dwell on for too long. So as a means to distract him - and herself - Claire turned in his arms and wrapped her own round his neck. “You on the other hand…” she teased. Her hand ran down the front of his shirt, then lower down.

“Aye, well. I canna imagine much of anything else wi’ yer hand where it is, Sassenach.” He bent down and kissed her, slowly, thoroughly, his own hands finding and cupping her perfectly round bottom, just as her hand found its way neatly beneath his kilt.

After what seemed a rather long time later, they finally broke apart, breathless, but mightily roused. “She may not have finished it, but we certainly can,” Claire said, with a firm and unrelenting grip on his cock, she steered him out of the study and up the stairs.