Are Sangwoo’s emotions genuine?

I’ve seen the word ‘love’ is being used a lot lately by the fans. Does Sangwoo really love Yoonbum or not? Does he feel any emotions at all? How genuine and real his emotions can be?

There are 3 possibilities based on certain personalities:

  1. He’s written as a psychopath and doesn’t and will never truly love Yoonbum.
  2. He’s suffering from some sort of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and is using the ‘numbing’ method to cope with everything. But he can fall in love.
  3. He has Borderline Personality Disorder and loves Yoonbum.

1. Antisocial Personality Disorder

I know Koogi didn’t do any researches about the disorders so keep in mind these are more about certain personalities. I’m not focusing on the disorders! Let’s imagine what happens if Sangwoo is written as a ‘stereotypical’ psychopath/crazy person (with some psychology facts).

Psychopaths have very shallow feelings. They do not understand fear at all, they lack empathy and do not feel guilt. There are certain emotions such as love and sadness and they do not feel those like others do. There are several panels with Sangwoo with question marks next to him, showing he’s genuinely confused because he doesn’t understand Yoonbum’s fear“Of course it’s dark, it’s a basement!!!?” or when he asks Yoonbum what is he doing when Yoonbum is trying to run away. He expects Yoonbum to stay quiet while he’s cutting him. He shows no empathy when Yoonbum talks about his past, even calls it “Boring”. There’s especially a panel I came across yesterday, of Sangwoo misinterpreting Yoonbum’s expression which leads me to believe Sangwoo does not understand ‘upset’, ‘sad’ or ‘scared’ because his ‘emotions’ are very limited, mostly to anger and summarized to feeling good, feeling bad.

Everything is a game for Sangwoo. And people are the toys. That shows how shallow he is. Think about him throughout the chapters. Every single move he made was for a game.

He plays until he’s bored of the game and then throws away the toys when there are no benefits for him in the game or when the game is not fun anymore. This is especially hard for a lot of fans to accept because they can’t believe after everything someone would just end it like that. But psychopaths do!

Sangwoo’s love for Yoonbum as a psychopath is not love at all. It’s self-centered. It’s about Sangwoo, not about Yoonbum. Psychopaths grow up learning from others. It helps them survive and fit in like a normal person but in the end they do not truly understand those feelings. Sangwoo does things to show affection but those are things he THINKS must be done in that certain situation and because he does not really understand them, they look wrong, out of place and weird. (like the bathroom scene or when he hugs Bum in the car or after they kill the man from the gaybar )

Even when showing affection and care, he’s doing those because he wants to and because there’s some sort of benefit for him.
He’s always treated Bum differently (from Day 1) because he is special but doing so, he always acts as if he’s doing Bum a favor, while in reality he’s doing it because there’s an advantage in it for him. He’s having fun and playing:

In brief, In his mind, he’s being nice to Bum, he might even think he’s in love. He’s giving him ‘gifts’ and ‘rewards’ because he wants him to cheer up, understand him or stop whining but his perception of ‘love’ and ‘care’ is very shallow and wrong and it will stay like that. Even if he ever tells Bum he loves him, it’s not the same love people talk about. It’s Sangwoo’s kind of love. Bum is special to him and he’s Sangwoo’s favorite toy! Sangwoo wants  him now but Yoonbum will be thrown away the moment he’s broken or useless.

2. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

“Love and feelings are nothing but weaknesses.”
You’ve probably heard that sentence or similar sentences to it from a lot of villains. The ones who are ambitious and want to take over the world. They believe feelings are unnecessary and make you weak.

We know Sangwoo is a victim of child abuse but we don’t know how bad the abuse was. Was there any sexual abuse involved? We also know he witnessed horrible events. The murder of his parents (whether it was himself who did it or his father). These sort of things usually lead to post traumatic stress disorder. Sometimes the victims use the ‘numbing’ method to be able to live on. This means they turn off their emotions and feelings to cope with the horrible past experiences. They might see feelings as weaknesses and we can see a lot of that in chapter 5:

“You know what? I hate guys like you the most. Guys that are too scared to die but are always complaining. Too absorbed with pitying themselves to do anything. Stop going on about how lonely you are. I hate that shit!”

In brief, while he can relate to Yoonbum, he hides his true feelings and thoughts in order to stay strong. He doesn’t show any emotions but he is capable of feeling them.

Now why this theory might be wrong? because people with PTSD, usually don’t even want to talk about/remember their past because it’s too painful for them but we saw Sangwoo talk about his past without any problem and he didn’t seem fazed at all. He didn’t even show any empathy when Bum spoke. So… back to number 1.

3. Borderline Personality Disorder

I’ve already wrote 2 long posts in February about Sangwoo’s BPD symptoms: PART 1, PART 2 so check those out if you haven’t yet.

While I think it’s a good theory, the thing about people with BPD is that their emotions are too intense. They feel TOO MUCH. No matter what the type is. At least we’ve seen Yoonbum switch between the feelings of love and hate quite a lot and even cry because the feelings hurt and he was confused… while Sangwoo’s feelings throughout the chapters is pretty much static. It goes from anger to frustration to boredom and etc (shallow emotions, so again, back to number 1!). We’ve only seen him in a rollercoaster of emotions once and that was when he thought Yoonbum ran away. However, that was a panic attack! Anxiety is what causes panic attacks. While fear and anxiety are interrelated, they’re not the same thing. He mostly felt hurt and betrayed, he was mostly angry. While I’ve talked about his fear of abandonment many times, that could also just be a panic attack triggered when he thought Yoonbum ‘betrayed/left/lied to’ him. It could also be a symptom of PTSD since he even had a vivid flashback.

But since these are not supposed to be on point, let’s not be very nitpicky. If he in fact has BPD, he’s already most likely in love with Yoonbum and he’d almost be destroyed if Yoonbum leaves him. (He might even consider killing himself or Yoonbum before that happens.)

So as a conclusion you can see why a lot of people might want to support the 3rd theory. Because Sangwoo will be vulnerable and in love with Yoonbum (and well, it’s more BL-ish :S). I’m not against that idea but personally I find the 1st theory more interesting and I think more facts and evidences lead to the 1st theory. He’s proven himself a psychopath over and over by showing no guilt/remorse, no empathy and no emotions and being impulsive and reckless is also a symptom of Antisocial Personality Disorder and not just BPD.

But in the end I suppose it depends on the author. Maybe Sangwoo will be the first psychopath to ever fall in love :p

All images belong to Lezhin. Artist/Author: Koogi

Though about Killing Stalking

I read Killing Stalking today… or I should say I spend my whole night and morning to read it. And holy shit it’s horrible, disgusting and there’s more violence, both physical and mental, than I have seen anywhere. But it’s also very interesting if you don’t think it’s just “sick love story” I see someone taking it - both fans and antis. It’s very interesting “study” of how constant violence changes you, how it might courage your “darker side” or your mental unstability. Also this is classic Stockholm syndrome case and I don’t understand how anyone (yes, anyone) can find it hot or even hope they stay together. 

Then again I have to take some of that statement back, because the case wasn’t that different when it comes to Hannibal and that show was brilliant and murderhusbands just works. Of course there’s lot of fiction, lot of false truths and so much coloring in these series that you can’t compare them to life. And there is also big difference between those two thing since constant raping, beating, making someone absolutely depending yourself isn’t big part of Hannibal, but whole series of Killing Stalking bases on that. 

Anyhow, I find it kind of far fetched when some people say that Killing Stalking is promoting rape culture and it’s teaching how this kind of behavior is acceptable, sexy and trendy. It really doesn’t and if this manga is making you think so, there is something already wrong in your mind or how you have been raised. This is dark story of serialkiller, who has mentally lost his mind and keeping mentally unstable, rape victim with unrealistic crush as a hostage. He, of course, developes a Stockholm syndrome and at that point (chapter 20) when he is given the option to run, he is too far gone to do so. Being with his kidnapper has become his reality and anything else is too scary. 

So, please, do not make this kind of behavior sexy or romantic or anything like that. It’s suppose to be sick and it suppose to stay that way. There is no “true love” and anything regarding that. It’s facinating manga about abuse of all kind and it makes us unconfortable and makes us question lot in ourselves. 

It’s art. And it’s not promoting anything. It’s not love story either. Keep those in mind.


This like almost sums up their relationship

I’ve been thinking about this, but I’ve seen a lot of people over the last few months upset about Koogi’s Q&A and I thought I’d give my two cents briefly.  It all boils down to one simple thing:  PR is not the same as storytelling.  What Koogi says in her interviews is interesting, and I enjoyed reading about the work she’s put in, but in the end, all that really matters to the story is, well, the story.  [The rest is under the readmore]

Keep reading

“Something changed in chapter 20. This used to be a guilty pleasure. I wasn’t sure why I liked it but I did and it was fine. But now I just feel bad. I don’t feel good watching what happened to Yoon. Seeing him get his legs smashed was fine, but getting thrown out, and blamed. Sangwoo being *actually* upset….it’s weird man.”

- Anonymous

“ I don’t like how people are using Killing Stalking to justify or help their mental illness/disorder. I want the best for these people and pray that they get the necessary help they deserve. Killing Stalking is not a good “representation” for mental illness, not in this genre especially. Too anyone reading this, of you do use this as representation it’s okay and I won’t judge you for it. It’s just my opinion on this serious topic.
Aside from this, good luck my friends. You can make it, I believe in you! :) ”

- Anonymous

anonymous asked:

Idk anything about ks, what's wrong w/ it?

i’ll be quick abt this bc i don’t wanna talk too much abt it. it’s a comic tht profits off of the abuse of a gay man (who is the main character). not only tht but it romanticizes tht abuse bc the author thmself groups the comic in the BL genre lol. it’s gross & fetishizes gay men The End

here’s a post tht goes more in-depth abt it if u want. tw for graphic content

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Tickets go on sale May 1. Guess who’s gonna be in line that morning? :)

anonymous asked:

As an abuse victim it fucking hurts like hell to see the people who so wholeheartedly fight against abuse ships and fictional abuse, yet they never take a stand against actual abuse or stand up for abuse victims. It's like this giant disconnect that I cannot quite wrap my head around...but no matter how much I try to figure it out, there is no way I can have complete understanding of their irrational thoughts/actions because they are- irrational

I’m really sorry seeing those behaviors is hard for you and I completely understand why you feel that way. Of course, no one is obligated to fight against everything bad that exists in the world because everyone has different limitations, but I definitely do my share of side-eyeing antis because they seem more interested in furthering their black and white worldview than actually helping anyone, and I think that’s why they focus more on harassing fans than helping victims. And since many of those fans are victims themselves, including myself, that just adds insult to injury, imo. Imagine if antis who ran hate blogs instead ran blogs focused on helping victims - boosting fundraising posts of people trying to escape bad situations, sharing resources about how to identify signs on abuse IRL, even just showing people how to blacklist their triggers on Tumblr. But you don’t see a whole lot of that - instead you see antis in the tags of things they don’t like, insistent on bothering fans when there are tangible things they can do to actually help people - even just on Tumblr.

And like yeah, I know at the end of the day everyone is a hypocrite about something, I’m guilty, we’re all guilty, but the thing that gets me about antis is that they have no self-awareness and that’s why they feel so secure in passing judgment on the rest of us and why they should, quite frankly, not be taken seriously. They’re never going to look at themselves through the same lens through which they view the world, because then they’d have to confront the fact that they’re self-righteous assholes who don’t really care about people.

koogi shouldnt write about gay characters being abused by someone who is homophobic. she is not gay, she has not experience homophobia, she does not know what its like to be mlm, therefore its not her story to tell! the whole reason why lgbt+ people can write about straight people but not vise-versa is because heterophobia doesnt exist and we arent trying to integrate it into our story