(it was tasty just so you know)

Happy Christmas Eve and Merry Christmas everyone!

I hope you’re all having a good day/night but I know this time of the year can be pretty hard for some people too.

I want you to remember that everything will be okay, even if you’re spending this weekend with unpleasant people or just alone. You are loved and there so many good things to look forward to, even if you can’t really see them now ok?

You can chat with a friend again, read a great story, pet a dog, meet someone amazing, discover tasty food, listen to a great new song, watch a good show or movie, learn new things, suddenly become passionate about something you’ve never considered and so many other things. Things that are only yours and I can’t really think about. They’re worth it, so hang in there.

Thank you everyone for the support and honestly for just being out there!

Little Sister

For an anon who requested “Can I get a one shot where the reader is like Tony’s cousin or sister and he forgot his lunch so she brings it to him and Gibbs and reader take a liking to each other when they first meet?”

You tossed the bag down in front of Tony, watching his head snap up in surprise and you smirked at him, arms crossed over your chest.

“Had I know how much of a struggle it was to get in your building I would have taken it to work and eaten it myself.” You laughed, sitting on the edge of his desk and looking around, “So this is where you work? Not bad, when you were little we were just hoping you learned how to hold a pen correctly.” You teased and Tony glared, opening his bagged lunch and glaring.

“You took my tasty cake.” He accused, rummaging through his bag, “Two fruits and no pastry? What do I look like to you, (Y/N)?”

“Someone who could use more fruit in the diet and less tasty cake obviously.” You grinned, and Tony looked more then ready to argue back when you were interrupted.

“Tony who’s this?” A woman with an accent asked, and you cocked an eyebrow at Tony, causing him to send you a dirty look, “New… girlfriend, we should know about?” You spun around, both you and Tony making nearly identical faces of disgust.

“Girlfriend?” He repeated, “No, this is my sister, (Y/N), (Y/N) this is my team Ziva David, and McGeek.”

“My name isn-” Tony didn’t even bat an eye.

“Abby is downstairs, you’d like her, and Ducky is our ME. Then there Gibbs, he’s our boss, and trust me he might look like a hard ass but he’s-”

“He’s what DiNozzo?” Tony paled slightly and struggled to get back to looking like he was doing something productive.

“A great boss and and great man?” Tony offered and you laughed out loud. This was great, watching someone besides you putting Tony in his place.

“Tony you’re being incredibly rude, introduce me.” He muttered under his breath before spinning around again.

“Boss, this is my little sister (Y/N) She has all of the devilish good looks of the rest of us DiNozzos and half of the charm.”

“Hey!” You glared, punching his arm.

“(Y/N), my dear, lovely sister, this is Gibbs. My boss.” You considered giving Tony the finger, then also considered the fact that you were an adult woman, in a federal building, so you settled for an eye roll before extending your hand to Gibbs.

“I’m sorry you got stuck working with my ever so charming brother.” Gibbs took your hand and shook it, chuckling slightly.

“Well, while I have to agree with the devilish good looks part, I find it hard to believe that you’re the less charming sibling.” Woah was that a blatant flirt? You blushed slightly and laughed, looking at your very very uncomfortable looking brother.

“You don’t seem like too much of a hardass either. My dearest brother must just be really bad at describing people.” You joked, ignoring the huff from behind you. Gibbs nodded in agreement, not even sparing his surprised looking team a glance.

“Well if you’re free sometime we could always do coffee, introduce ourselves in our own words.” He offered.

“Sounds good to me, Gibbs.” You smirked.

“Call me Jethro, please.”

“Well then it sounds good to me, Jethro. But I’m running late so I’ll..” You grabbed a piece of paper from your brother’s desk and jotted down your number, handing it over and grabbing your bag, “Call me later,” You swooped and kissed your brother’s cheek before waving at this team, “Nice meeting you all!” You called before seeing yourself out. Everyone was silent for a moment, unsure of what exactly they just witness.


“Yes boss?”

“Get back to work.” 



We all know ThanksGiving and Christmas is a Time of Love and FEASTING on Delicious Tasty Foods But theres always the Inevitable weight Gain.

 How Can we stop it? Do you just accept it? Well No worries Today I give yall some SUPER EASY tips how to Keep The Fat off 

while still having some Solid Fun times with the Family and loved ones.

 Reblogs Greatly Appreciated and Be sure to Share this with all you friends and Family so they can keep the fat off as well.

anonymous asked:

Just stopping by to let you know you are one of my favorite artist. I adore everything you create and I love your art style. You inspire me plus you're just really rad! So I hope you get to eat tasty food and catch something mid-fall and peeps see it



We all know ThanksGiving and Christmas is a Time of Love and FEASTING on Delicious Tasty Foods But theres always the Inevitable weight Gain.  How Can we stop it? 

Do you just accept it? Well No worries Today I give yall some SUPER EASY tips how to Keep The Fat off while still having some Solid Fun times with the Family and loved ones. 

Reblogs Greatly Appreciated and Be sure to Share this with all you friends and Family so they can keep the fat off as well.

I really appreciate all the kind words that have been sent and people responding to when I asked for some happy news and just.. all the love and support through what I’ve been going through. I’ve gotten a lot of kinda.. vague advice and I know you guys just tried the best you could to help and just messaging me at all helped greatly, then the words also had their impact. I just haven’t been in a right place to reply, especially with so many, my replies… I would feel like it would end up repetitious. Because of this, I’d like to apologize for not replying and hope you understand that it seems very daunting to go back and reply to you all. I’ll be happy to have any convos through pm’s though because I have finally dealt with my feelings and can talk more freely now, but note the details to my problems are actually quite severe. Feel free to talk about not that too though lmao. 

thank you all for understanding and caring! <3 Please don’t think I’ve just ignored you because I didn’t like you or something. 


Rest in peace to my favorite goat, with the most beautiful soul. Over these last two years I’ve connected with Clark in ways I didn’t know to be possible with a farm animal. When I first moved to Kentucky he was just a little, shy baby and slowly, with the help of some tasty grain, I was able to gain his trust and love. Clark never tried to head butt me or eat my hair like the other boy goats. He would come when you called his name (unless he was munching on a yummy patch of grass) and would always lay right next to me when I sat on the ground. So I guess what I’m getting at is he was literally the best goat you could ask for, and I will always hold a very special place in my heart for this loving boy ❤️

A lot of people on tumblr enjoyed Clark so I figured we could all give him one last goodbye 😭

anonymous asked:

Are the rumours true? Jeff Nelson aka VegSource and Dr. John McDougall want to DEBUNK RawTill4??

But Jeff rides a bike and his kids do daily fitness. They eat more fruit than McDougall recommends and they consume refined sugars. I know because Ive eaten some of the food they made up. Tasty AF.

I think you are just trolling mate to create some drama.

Ive read starch solution but it was a few years ago. I can’t remember it having any objective fitness tips. I do remember it said something about how fruit causes obesity because of fructose so I cranked out the white out pen and covered over that part. Everything looks pretty good though. 


Tess: Oh, here’s the food now! Everything looks so tasty, I don’t know where to start.

Richard: You must be joking? This is absolutely grotesque. Waitress, I ordered filet mignon, not scraps to bring home in a bag for my dogs! Take it back to the kitchen immediately, or I’ll have your job.”

Waitress: R-right away, sir!

Tess: What? Rich, what the hell was that? Don’t you think you are being a touch overcritical, that poor woman just walked away in tears!

lizzistims  asked:

I'm new to stimming. I have really bad anxiety and stimming was related to really bad episodes in my head because of social norms and videos and stuff. I've realized stimming loud and proud with is just fine! And its already helping so much!! <3

aww :c I’m really sorry that you were so turned off to it because of other people. Stimming is sooo helpful and amazing. I really don’t know what I would do without it. It has helped me through so much when I had no way to help me calm down. I’m very glad you’re able to get help from it too! 


“It is possibly five in the morning right now.”
“You don’t even understand my cookie game, bro.”
“That wet your tasty whistle, dude?”
“Yes. No. Possibly.”
“At age six, I was born without a face.”
“My dad told me that I would be accepted as a true man, little did he know that wasn’t the case.”
“He didn’t lie, he just didn’t know.”
“I activated my trap-hole card.”
“You know what Yu-Gi-Oh! means in German? It just means Yu-Gi-Oh.”
“Why is the game playing itself?!”
“Honestly, I’m so confused right now.”
“You’re just saying words.”
“Apparently, I’m the slave and you’re the master.”
“Once upon a time, these cookies - … right?”
“No, it’s not! It’s awful!”
“I was gonna say the cookie mafia.”
“My penis went straight in it.”
“If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times. Don’t put your penis in the cookie batter.”
“Maybe I’m bullshiting you.”
“Have you ever been so sick that you shit your pants?”
“Why would you shit your pants from a cold?”
“It’s like a defense mechanism, I don’t know.”
“Do you ever think of what Randy Quade fucks like?”
“Make it fast, I’m wanted by the law.”
“I was also borned to fuck.”
“Draco from - from My Immortal?”
“I’m absolutely rocking your shit apart.”
“This isn’t a dick measuring contest.”
“You know what else is shallow? A pool. At the shallow part.”
“Well, fuck.”
“You have nailed it yet again, my friend.”
“You’re going to ask me what Einstein’s thing right now?”
“How many times have I told you that you’re beautiful?”
“Not enough.”
“Don’t say anything.”
“It’s a Justin Bieber song.”
“Is it really?”
“Nothing you just said made sense.”
“I’ve got 99 cookie problems and this is bitch is one.”
“Watch out, Jay-Z.”
“My days are numbered.”
“God damn it!”
“What if you pulled down your pants and your wiener was a Snickers? Would you eat it?”
“Don’t do this right now.”
“Real talk, would you eat it?”
“I hope you burn in hell.”
“That was the most not good way of saying that it’s good.”
“Your friendship is a treasure.”

kazechi  asked:

May I request a gif reaction of bangtan seeing their foreigner gf/bf try Korean food for the first time?

Suga: Don’t be so nervous; you just gotta-

Kookie: I know it’s delicious; I’m not even gonna ask.

Tae: /gets excited/ Is it tasty? It’s tasty right? 

Jimin: Not saying this could possibly happen… but if you don’t like it, you could always wash the taste out with my lips…

Hobi: See now you’ll know the secret to my sunshine~

Rapmon: /nervously waits for a reaction/ 

Jin: /continues eating and looks at you expectantly/ Well?…

- Devi (๑・ω-)~♥” (I really want to go to my go-to korean restaurant rn ;^; but it’s almost 2AM ;A;)

Ancient History

The actual history of the Monster Hunter world is sparse to say the least and most of what we have comes from stuff that likely isn’t even canon.  That said, for the time being, it is all we have to go on, so go on it we shall!  Just take it all with a grain of salt.  Ya know…  a boulder-sized grain.

Almost all of what we know comes from a single piece of concept art published in Monster Hunter Illustrations vol. 1 (which you all should go purchase, along with vol. 2 so we can show Capcom that us Westerners actually want more of these tasty lore-filled Monster Hunter books, and maybe they’ll give them to us.)

The Equal Dragon Weapon

The caption reads: 

“The Equal Dragon Weapon was discovered in some ruins, an ancient storage facility.  It is possibly the only remaining weapon of war from the age of the Great Dragon War.  This man-made dragon was pieced together using parts harvested from over thirty mature dragons.

However artificial, the Equal Dragon Weapon boasts a might comparable to any living dragon.  Its physical strength, endurance, and firepower are said to have posed the most relevant threat to the dragons during the ancient war.

The technology behind crafting an Equal Dragon Weapon reached is pinnacle during the Great Dragon Wars, but that technology, along with the great dragon hunters of the day (ancestors of the modern day monster hunters), were not destined to last.  The humans engaged the dragons in a war of epic scale, with both sides fighting valiantly and viciously until they were simultaneously brought to the brink of extinction.”

Basically put, at the time, humanity (and wyverians?) were more scientifically advanced than they currently are in-game, and, as now, the majority of their inventions required monster bits.  Unlike now, they were not so ecologically friendly about how they got said bits, and the dragons, far more numerous and possibly more intelligent than in modern times, got just a bit fed up with being driven to extinction for the sake of human technology.  The result was the Great Dragon War, which was so costly and horrible that both sides were nearly driven extinct.  Having learned their lesson, the Hunter’s Guild was founded to regulate hunting, preventing the over-exploitation of any single species and allowing the humanoid races and monsters to live… well, if not exactly in peace, then at least in balance.  (This, by the way, is the reason behind why some quests in the MH games cycle, especially the Elder Dragon quests.  The idea being that Elder Dragons are rare and slow-breeding and need time to repopulate, lest their numbers become too low to be sustained.)

There is a lot of speculation on the internet about this period in MH’s history.  Some people seem to think that “more technologically advanced” means computers and space travel and genetic engineering and what have you. I disagree with this conclusion very strongly.  Not only is it simply not supported in-game (there are no ruined computer labs or rocket launch pads or rusting rebar in the ruins we see), it’s not supported by the Equal Dragon Weapon itself, either.  Look at it.  That is not a genetically-modified organism.  That is not a robot.  That’s Frankenstein’s Monster.

Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein in 1818, and she didn’t write it in a vacuum.  The Western world at the time was infatuated with electricity, especially with galvanism, discovered by Luigi Galvani in 1780.  Galvanism was essentially the observation that muscles contract when exposed to an electric current, even muscles belonging to a dead corpse.  It was thus believed that, if given the right conditions and just the right electrical stimulation, a dead creature could be shocked back to life.  This electricity was thought to be literally the “spark of life”.  Galvani’s nephew, Giovanni Aldini, often acted as half-scholar and half-showman, showing off the results of his research to crowded audiences throughout Europe.  Aldini used everything from frog legs to the corpses of executed criminals to display galvanism’s power and spread the idea of it far and wide.

With the Equal Dragon Weapon’s inspiration in mind then, I believe that, at it’s peak, the MH World’s level of technology was equivalent to Georgian-Victorian Era England.  So no computers, aside from possibly punch-card-powered calculating machines.  No genetic engineering.  Cars are unlikely (and certainly no weaponized rockets or space craft), but combustion engines and industrialization could be a thing and electricity definitely existed in some form, even if it wasn’t yet widely available.  People tend to forget, when dealing with fiction, that there are more levels of technology than just “Medieval” and “Star Trek”.

And that’s really about all we have to go on in regards to the world’s ancient history.  Even if the Great Dragon War isn’t actually canon, we know with some certainty that something BAD happened in the past in the MH world.  Because there are ruins everywhere.  EVERYWHERE.  In almost every single hunting area in the entire series you can find traces of past civilization, from the carved cliffs of the Deserted Isle, to the Dune’s caves, and the Ancestral Steppe’s crumbling cinnabar walls.  Even in remote, supposedly unexplored areas like the Everwood.  And almost all of them at the same level of decay, which means they were all abandoned around the same time.  What could have happened to cause so many disparate places to be abandoned all at once?

I also quickly wanted to address another idea I’ve seen floating around in the intertubes.  The idea that Monster Hunters are half-wyverian, mainly as an explanation for game mechanics, like not taking fall damage and… ya know… not instantly dying after being stepped on by a dragon weighing several metric tons.  As you can probably guess, I don’t agree with this either.  One piece of evidence offered was the notion that hunters have slightly pointed ears…

That is not a pointed ear.  That is a low-polygon ear. :P

On top of that, it’s very questionable whether humans and wyverians would be able to have children anyway.  Wyverians are not even closely related to humans, they’re descended from wyverns.  They ARE wyverns, technically, just like humans ARE apes.  Expecting a wyverian and a human to be able to have offspring is a bit like expecting a human and an ostrich to be able to.  Not happening. :P  (Not like that’s ever stopped fantasy/sci-fi stories before, hello Mr. Spock, but MH does tend to be decently science-y for a fantasy world.)

Game mechanics are game mechanics, and it’s a mistake to think that there’s always a good in-universe reason for why they exist.  They simply aren’t always going to, because this is a video game, and in a video game the gameplay comes before EVERYTHING else, including story and lore.

And that’s it for the history of the MH world!  If there’s a particular topic you’d like to see in a future post, feel free to drop me a note.  Thanks for reading, and may your hunts always be ecologically friendly!

thecurlycaptain  asked:

I'm literally so in love with Cosmic Boy that it fills my lame-o heart with this mushy feeling of happiness, and I just want to teleport to wherever you are and like, buy you a tasty burger or whatever you'd like because you're so kind and nice to us for writing all these great things like CB. That was a super run on sentence mess but really thank you so much, I appreciate you, and your kindness, and your Adam memes and your writing ~tons~

omg saying things like this make me so happy because I love writing for you guys but knowing that you all appreciate it/like it makes it all the better and that’s all I could ask for (also cute messages, i love receiving them bc my heart wants to explode) :’) thank u so much!!

BTS  They Cook For You

Jin – This would not be the first nor last time he cooked for you. Mama Jin wants to feed the people he loves and you would definitely be on that list. He’d enjoy experimenting and trying new recipes for you, things that he’d never made for anyone else. Everything coming from his kitchen would be tasty and gorgeous like it should be showcased in a gourmet magazine. However if this was for a special occasion he’d make all your favorites just so you know that he loves you and wants to comfort you not just with his presence but also on a much more basic level.

Suga – Despite jokes that he can’t cook, he can follow basic recipes. It would be a simple meal but he would make the effort and you’d be able to see that clearly. If you complimented him on the food he’d drop his head a bit and thank you, then steer the conversation to something less embarrassing for him but on the inside he’d be glowing. He’d probably only share the fact that he cooked for you with Jin. It’s not that he’d feel emasculated or anything. Suga just wouldn’t want to put up with the teasing that would ensue from the other members.

J-Hope – Hobi would try, he really would. But he’s not going to work himself up in knots over it. If the food turns out well, great. If not there’s always delivery. He’s more concerned about enjoying your company and making sure you have a good time. If he tried to prepare something simple it would probably not be too bad. He’d also crack jokes about his own cooking if it wasn’t that good. Anything to keep you happy and laughing. If his cooking did turn out horrible though he’d order dessert with the delivered dinner, presenting it to you with aegyo so you’d forgive him.

Rap Monster – You’re probably thinking the kitchen would catch on fire, but nope. Joonie is going to be very careful and approach this logically. It’s just following directions, right? It’s not the ingredients he has problems with it’s the mechanics of cooking. There will be mishaps. Food will fly off the counter, fingers will get sliced, and things will boil over as he’s focused on the finer points of dicing. The food would be edible but undercooked in some parts, overcooked in others. But he greeted you at the door with a hopeful, dimpled expression and bandaids on his fingers. How could you not love it with how hard he tried? Even if it didn’t taste good it would be one of the best meals you’d ever had.

Jimin – Jimin would jump into this idea with both feet but then panic when it can time to actually do it. He wants so, so much for it to be a good meal and impress you that he’s going to make very simple mistakes when he’s looking out for bigger ones. Even if it turned out decent, Jimin would still be self-conscious about it. Hurriedly he’d leave to pick up carry out and plate everything before you got there hiding the damning restaurant containers in the closet until you left. He’d never tell you unless you’d been together for years and then he’d confess.  

Taehyung – He’d probably only do this as an opportunity to be cute and playful with you. If it was to cheer you up from a rough week, he would want to pick something up for you from your favorite restaurant and set up the table romantically. Cooking is not Tae’s strong suit. But if this was just for fun he’d have a blast. He’d buy cookie cutters and food dye. Things would be all kinds of shapes and colors. And to top that off he’d toss in some of his favorite, unusual, food combinations and pester until you tried them. This would be so much fun and you both would laugh all night.

Jungkook – Straight up he’d call Jin for advice and have him walk him through the process. He’d taste it several times as he cooked it but by that point his taste buds would have become accustomed and he just flat out can’t tell anymore. He’d be so nervous setting it before you then taking a quick step back like it was a snake about to bite him. When you honestly tell him it’s good he’d blush and stare at his feet while he grinned uncontrollably. Later when he saw his hyungs he’d strut around a bit about what a great meal he made for you. ​

Red Dragon con recap #4

Part 1: Friday - Arrival, Opening ceremony, Meet & Greet

Part 2: Saturday - Scott and Aaron Q & A

Part 3: Saturday - Lara Jean and Kacey Q & A

SATURDAY - Mads and Katharine Q & A

  • Mads arrived with a beer (of course) and started the panel with “Hello fannibals. You all look very pretty”. Someone in the audience: “do we look tasty?”, Mads: “Always. But I just had a pizza…”
  • Then, ALREADY, my worst fears came true and someone asked a fanfiction question omfg. I was ready to leave the Earth at that point…HOWEVER Mads being Mads, he answered the question with such a good humour and the answer was so great that I had to be glad the question was asked! You all should know how it went by now, but here’s a reminder:
  • Katharine on working with Michael Pitt: he was crazy in the best way possible!
  • She also commented how Hannibal was actually pretty supportive of Margot. “I always thought Hannibal was lovely to Margot. He’s like the sweetest uncle but in a fucked up way.” Mads: “He always sees what’s right for people before they see it themselves” Katharine: “He’s like Oprah.” M: “She’s going to love that”. 
  • On if Hannibal would ever kill Alana because he “promised to do so”: Alana has to live with the knowledge that it may come to her eventually, and he was joking about eating their kid: “he belongs to me. I might get hungry…”. I think he also mentioned stealing the kid for himself…
  • I also tweeted “Hannibal got a bit irrational with some things” and oh god isn’t that the understatement of the century, but honestly I don’t remember the context for it??? Like Mads explained something how intelligent & logical Hannibal is, but he’s also very emotional.
  • Katharine explained how in her sex scene with Caroline they had to wear nude thongs+nipple pasties, and they couldn’t eat anything the whole day…and after filming they pretty much raided a hot dog stand lol
  • Mads about the S3 final scene: “Yes, I know what we did…” and then he seemed surprised to learn Bryan had cut the ending since he has not seen the final product himself. “They toned it down??”
  • Katharine auditioned for My Little Pony voice over omg
  • About Clarice: she wouldn’t replace Will in Hannibal’s heart, they would have to have a different kind of relationship

Everyone pretty much died of laughter when Mads made this face…I just blanked out so I have no memory of the context lmao

  • “What kind of mixtape would you make for your characters?” Mads: “Doors, for the martyr he is.” Katharine: “Wu Tang Clan” LOL
  • If Margot would had been an only child, she might have become Mason
  • Mads would definitely continue working with Hannibal if possible, because the show is something special, and thanked the fans for sticking with it. “Hannibal is the kind of show that can sleep and then be picked up”. Mads also said Bryan hasn’t made anything that isn’t worth supporting. Katharine actually teared up a bit when Mads was explaining how special this show is ;__;
  • Every time Katharine explained something about her previous film works (often very lascivious) Mads was like “I have to see that” omg
  • Hannibal would be proud of Will’s “firefly man” tableau in Lithuania
  • Will forgetting him was the last thing Hannibal wanted to hear, so that’s why he surrendered. The only way Will would see him again is if he’s in jail, and he would eventually visit. He was afraid he’d never see Will again otherwise.
  • Mads about Hannibal/Bedelia: “I don’t think it’s super healthy. I think our relationship is the healthiest *points at Katharine*”. They’re also very into brushing & washing  each others’ hair ahah. Somebody also asked if they did do the do, and the answer was “many times” x’D
  • Katharine said she grew up as a vegan but she “got over it”
  • If Margot had Will’s baby, it would be very hard for Hannibal to get over it. He’d be jealous and very grumpy
  • Abigail was never meant to be food (though she’d would surely be tasty, so ”maybe on a rainy day” LOL). But this is the point where I think everyone in the audience died a little bit because of this:

Now, here’s the “Would Hannibal allow Will to keep dogs?” question:

NOW, LET ME ADDRESS THE ABOVE TWEET…some people apparently heard him using the word “marriage” (or they paraphrased) but I…don’t remember hearing it? Anyway, some people really went with the “IT’S NOW CONFIRMED THEY’RE MARRIED!” which…is not true. He was talking about partnership and perhaps a marriage LIKE situation, but not about them being officially married. 

  • What kind of dog? Purebreed, of course, with a name from a very old dictionary (or Fluffy! Or Tyson the Killer???), he then shortly came up with “Encephalitis” for the dog’s name because it was the only long word he could remember LOL

It was kind of funny when Mads got told one more question, and he then suggested the people in the question line to fight XD But then he said “no, six more!”. Also, at the end of the panel Mads said he’d have more time to talk with everyone during the autograph sessions and he’d be around the whole weekend aww. It seemed he really felt bad for not being able to answer everyone’s questions!

Oh lord this got long, but I tried to include as much as I could! 

NEXT: Part 5: Sunday - Aaron and Scott Q & A II

Sonja takes out a Pocky bag. Jordan says he’s never tried it before, tastes it, and says that it’s just a chocolate stick. Sonja says yeah and that it’s tasty. In the background we hear Tom say ‘you don’t know where it’s been’, so Jordan smiles smugly and pretty much deepthroats the Pocky. Had to watch it twice to make sure.
And then Jordan pointed the camera at Tom and Tom mimed eating really fast, like a squirrel.
I can’t with those two, they’re just so sweet!

I’ve always been told not to be hung up on one person, theres more fish in the sea…
But as my feelings for you worsen, i realise you’re the only fish for me. Doesn’t matter how hydrated I am the thought of you will still make me thirty, with those frosted tips those lush lips god, have mercy. Hair, white as snow and a shirt covered in flames, I just want you to know I jerk of to guy’s grocery games! All I want is to feel you inside me. I would kneel down, as you pull down those pants and deepfry me. Anything you want, Guy, vanilla or kinky, my asshole can stretch, so insert more than a pinky. Put your whole fist in their, I promise I’ll make it real stinky. I promise you, Guy, I swear that I’m tasty. I'm  your fucking thanksgiving turkey, baste me! Any hole of mine is yours to pound. I’m begging you, Guy, take me to flavor town. You could pulverize me with a strap on harness, you can cum on my face and call it a garnish. Guy, when I see you eat shit on t.v. I see the passion in your eyes, weather you’re chomping on chicken tendies or just a fucking hand full of fries. Smash Mouth, yeah, you look like their lead singer. Down south, is where I wanna go to find your big dinger.

  • White woman #1: I won’t eat couscous anymore.
  • White woman #2: [genuinely shocked] Really? Not even Israeli couscous?
  • White woman #1: [sarcastically] I don’t know, Stacy, does it have couscous in the name?
  • - white women, in Boulder
  • submitted by Angie