Dancing On My Own: Part 7
Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader / Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word Count: 1342
Summary: Bucky Barnes never imagined himself falling in love with anyone, especially his best friend’s girl. Of course his plans were shot to hell when Steve decided to surprise everyone and propose to you on your birthday. Had he missed his shot, or would he be willing to risk both of his closest friendships in hopes of winning your heart?
Author’s Notes: Thanks for being patient! I always love hearing from you guys <3. Please let me know if you would like to be tagged
The last thought you had had before drifting to sleep had been about Steve – which followed you through your dreams. As his body moved near yours in the warm early morning sun you couldn’t help but wrap your arms around his neck and press your lips against his. Through the haze of your tiredness you had noticed that his lips felt softer as his stubble scratched against your face. It felt like he hadn’t shaved in a day or two which seemed odd. It wasn’t until you felt the coolness of metal against your cheek that you opened your eyes and pulled away in panic to find Bucky.
“I… god… I thought you were,” you mumbled frantically as you sat up.
“Steve,” Bucky finished the sentence for you. “I… I’m sorry,” he added miserably as he sat up beside you. You could feel a blush creep slowly up your neck as you looked at your best friend as he sat beside you. The sound of Steve’s name caused panic to bubble in your chest. How would you tell him about this? Would you? You weren’t completely convinced that you didn’t know it was Bucky. Regardless – it had happened, and there was no way to undo it. It was in that moment that you felt the uncomfortable sense of your life shifting. The sensation was jarring at first, but after the initial shock it felt as if something had snapped into place. You sat in silence unblinking as you stared at one another. You swallowed hard as you grasped your resolve before scooting closer to Bucky – until you were right in front of him. “Y/N, what are you…” he began to ask uncertainly.
“I just – I…” you whispered softly as you placed your hand gently on his face. Bucky’s eyes closed at the contact – at first with relief, but his features soon contorted to pain as his hand cupped yours and pulled it away. You opened your mouth to speak but a crack of lightening shot across the sky emitting a loud rumble of thunder – effectively cutting you off.
“We should go,” he whispered – not meeting your eyes – as he stood and pulled you up alongside him.
“Yeah… we should go…” you muttered as you slowly broke from your stupor before departing your peaceful dwelling. Something had certainly changed, but maybe it wasn’t for the better.
You walked through the field behind your house in silence. Before you could work up the courage to speak your mind the sky opened up and released a torrential rain. “Let’s wait it out in the barn!” You yelled over your shoulder as you ran through the walls of water.
You reached the barn completely drenched and out of breath. You were relieved to find shelter from the storm that seemed to be growing in intensity. “Buck?” You called as you turned to find Bucky running in behind you – hair soaking wet and his shirt plastered to his torso.
“I’m here. Are you okay?” he asked breathless as he peeled his shirt off and carefully placed it to dry. The action made you blush and look away.
“I.. um.. yeah I’m fine,” you muttered nervously as you desperately tried to wring your shirt dry.
“I can look away,” Bucky’s voice came from behind you – causing you to jump.
“What?” you asked startled as you turned to look at him.
“I can… I can look away so you can take you shirt off to dry,” he replied sheepishly.
“It’s fine Buck. It’s not like you haven’t seen me in a swim suit,” you answered with your best casual shrug. Of course – he also hadn’t kissed you until today either, but you decided to file that issue under things to think about later as you lifted your shirt over you head and tossed it next to his to dry. Bucky kept his eyes fixed anywhere, but you. “I think there’s a picnic blanket in one of the chests over there. I’m going to go check,” you explained as you tilted your head in the direction of the chest. As you turned your back to him you could feel his eyes bore into you. His look was the least of your worries as you rifled through the chest and procured the dusty picnic blanket. In fact, since the kiss – since that sudden shift – every bit of you longed for every bit of him. It was as if someone had pulled a veil from your eyes and suddenly you saw him for the first time. As you turned to walk back to him you nervously chewed your bottom lip. You weren’t reasoning with yourself anymore as you admired him. You were both here together – completely alone. Bucky had flown you halfway across the country and refused to leave you. He was here, and with that realization the words flew out of your mouth before you had time to bottle them up. “You kissed me back.”
Bucky’s eyebrows shot up as his face reddened. “I’m… I’m sorry, doll,” he managed to say as he nervously ran his hands through his hair.
“Why?” you asked as you sat down and wrapped yourself in the blanket – motioning for Bucky to sit beside you. Bucky obliged– careful to keep enough distance between you and him.
“Well to be fair… you kissed me first,” he chuckled nervously.
“Why did you think I was kissing you?”
“Why do you think I kissed you?” Bucky retorted. You could tell that he was going to try anything to continue dancing around the truth.
“That’s not fair – you can’t answer a question with another question,” you huffed as you crossed your arms under the blanket. You shivered suddenly. It was quite cool in the dark barn and the rain outside made it seem even cooler.
“Come here,” Bucky muttered as he wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close. His warmth immediately radiated around you eliciting a sigh from your lips. He chuckled softly as you rested your head on his shoulder. The feeling of his hand on your waist ignited the magnetic pull you had noticed in the tree house. Your breath caught in your throat as your heart threatened to burst from your chest. “Doll, what is it?” Bucky asked.
“Why did you kiss me back, Bucky?” you asked – making sure to keep your voice measured. Bucky tensed beside you – it was evident that he had no intention of talking about it. “I need to know. I need to hear you say it,” you whispered softly as you turned to look at him knowing that his answer could change everything.
Bucky wanted to tell you. He wanted to take you in his arms and kiss you. He wanted to never let you go. This was the moment he had been waiting for for years, but nothing felt right. “I…” he muttered uncomfortably under his breath. He felt gripped by panic. The words fell from his lips before he could stop himself. “It was just a mistake doll. It’s… it’s been a long time since anyone has kissed me like that, and I guess I just got caught up in the moment,” he answered matter-of-factly.
“Oh,” you muttered as you diverted your eyes to the ground. Bucky watched as disappointment played across your face. He wanted to tell you the truth of course, but he couldn’t. Not now – maybe not ever. He had thought that he had made up his mind – that he would steal you away from Steve, and he thought he had reconciled his conscious, but he hadn’t. You were too good – too beautifully broken for a man like him. He would ruin you, and he knew it. You deserved a man like Steve. “It’s stopped,” your voice snapped Bucky out of his self reflection as you stood and pulled your wet shirt back on.
“So it has,” he answered miserably as he watched you leave. “I did it because I love you,” he whispered sadly to himself as he hung his head in his hands.
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