((spain problems))

And the sh*t goes on

You may not know this, but Spanish golfer Sergio García has just won the US Masters. Jon Rahm - a Basque golfer who was favourite - also played but ultimately lost to García.

And because some people are unable to praise someone without insulting another person, actor-turned-far-right-politician Toni Cantó has tweeted this jewel:

“It’s their problem if someone want to stick to their 8 weird surnames, to their little language, to the tribe. Spain is García”.

We’ll leave aside his gratuitous attack to Basque people. He refers to the fact that García is one of the most common surnames in Spain. The problem is:

Originally posted by my-ahs-world

anonymous asked:

Hello, first of all, i have to say that i have discovered your blog today and i really like it😍. Can you do a headcanon about erazel getting jealous??, Sorry about my english, i know that is horrible but i am from spain😅

No problem~ Puedo hablar español un poco :D 

I’m really happy about your message, you don’t know how much it mean for me ^^ I don’t have any resquest but yours sooo~ Let’s do this !

Ezarel being jealous

  • Most of the time he shows it by being meaner than usual. For example: If Nevra is flirting with you like his usual self , he will not be jealous because he knows Nevra is like that with everyone. But if he sees him, blushing and not controlling the situation like he usually does, he would step in the conversation and says dark and sarcastic remark about Nevra.
  • He trusts you, but not the others. That’s why he doesn’t like when a boy touch you. He hates it so much that when you come at him and try to touch , he orders you to wash your hands… Even all your body. He will glare at the boys just after, who does he think he is ? Sometimes he comes at you at take your arms with a empty smile saying he needs you. He is so calm that he is almost creepy.
  • If you want him to be jealous, it will make him angry. He doesn’t like being jealous because whatever he does, he still has the little feleing inside hhis heart which makes him think of you and the reason far what he is jealous.
  • He hates being jealous but he looves seeing you jealous. It makes him laugh so hard. Sometimes he even put a scenarios for you to be jealous but you yelled at him so much that he felt bad. The next morning , you find a honey jar in front of your door. Of course, he pranks all the boys who makes him have this annoying feelings.

anonymous asked:

Do you think that Elizabeth would have been able to influence Henry to treat Katherine better had she lived? He didn't seem to listen to her on such matters but Elizabeth would prob have at least tried to make her more comfortable.

Maybe? I’m not so sure if she would have influenced so much as she might have quietly provided Catherine of Aragon with some money like she did her sisters. Maybe with Elizabeth their Henry’s temperament would have been different in his later years? Hard to tell it wasn’t Elizabeth’s death alone that caused his shift, it was just the final straw. 

I think you need to keep in mind Elizabeth not dying doesn’t prevent the problems in Spain from not happening. Catherine became an unattractive bride because of her mother’s death and the conflict between Philip the Handsome and Ferdinand of Aragon. Then after that was over Ferdinand didn’t want to finish paying her dowry and that really pissed Henry VII off (Lol he was a major dick about money). Elizabeth not dying doesn’t stop any of this. I’m still certain that Henry VII wouldn’t have allowed Catherine and Henry VIII to marry even if Elizabeth hadn’t died. It wasn’t politically what was best at the moment. 

But I speculate maybe Elizabeth would have offered charity towards her due to the fact that she was her daughter-in-law. 

anonymous asked:

Story of Don Quixote please? (I just love the way you write them out)

don quixote usually starts with our title character, hereafter referred to as don q, and his trusty sidekick sancho panza.

don q has lived life a lot, being sort of an old fart, and decides that he must live a life now of chivalry and knighthood because fuck it, PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW HIS NAME. he follows the spectral image of dulcinea, who is sometimes his long lost love who he can’t fucking get over, and who is sometimes just his dream lady, because idealized femininity is rad as fuck yo. often times, don q is portrayed as a little touched in the head, because whoever wrote this damn ballet decided that mental illness was a fun punchline

next we run into the town of barcelona, where a lot of fun stuff is happening, mainly this bitch kitri

she’s basically the hottest slice of ass in town and she fucking knows it. she waltzes in and everyone is like “damn our girl is back again hallelujah.” she’s got a hot boyfriend, basilio, who is a barber  and also possibly one of the hottest humans to grace this godforsaken swatch of spain. only problem is that homegirl has an overbearing dad. usual patriarchal bull shit where the dad decides that HE should be the one who decides whom his daughter marries even though you know, her fucking life, her fucking choice.

despite the fact that this guy basilio

is a hot piece of ass, lorenzo, our dad bro, thinks he is poor shit. plus, basilio likes to dick around and play his eensy weensy guitar a lot, which makes lorenzo thinks that he isn’t serious enough to support his precious angel daughter forever. instead he wants to marry kitri off to this absolute turkeyfuck gamache, who is the richest guy in town and an absolute idiot.

kitri’s fucking around with gamache, oftentimes literally knocking him to the floor, when in wanders don quixote and sancho panza on their magical mystical quest. don q gets a little confused, thinking that kitri is dulcinea, because all beautiful ladies look the same when you are elderly and probably need an old timey glasses prescription. he gets friendly with kitri and so of course, when she and basilio book it the fuck out of town, he follows them, taking not only the very frustrated sancho panza, who has just been literally tossed around by a bunch of smack happy villagers, but also gamache and lorenzo, who want to stop this shady business once and for fucking all!

so kitri and basilio flee to the closest place outside of town a ~g*psy~ camp because ballet is a big fan of appropriating oppressed cultures, where they hope to hide and dick around for a bit. not for fucking long though because SURPRISE don q has followed them. their frolicking and canoodling and makin out is seriously interrupted when don comes in. not only can they no longer make out, but in the confusion of it being too damn dark, and him being old as balls, and the aforementioned other shit going on, he mistakes a windmill for a giant, and attacks it with his lance. because immovable structures generally stand up pretty well to attack by human, don q loses and ends up knocked out on the ground.

while he’s out, he has a twisted fucking dream. not only does he see the vision of kitri, who now starts to symbolize dulcinea, he also sees a big ass flock of dryads, who are basically tree spirits, their beautiful bomb as hell queen, and cupid, the spirit of love.

in this whacked out wild dream, he starts to realize that no, kitri and dulcinea are not the same bitches, and that he wants to help out our precious baby to get hitched to her tasty man. when he wakes up, he follows k and b to a bar where they want to party and live it up. unfortunately, as they are drinking and living largeee, in comes kitris dad and her pompous dicksauce fiance gamache. and what a surprise mister I KNOW WHATS BEST FOR MY DAUGHTER BECAUSE SHE OBVIOUSLY DOESNT dad i  pissed as all hell. he starts demanding that this bitch come home with this idiot, who is falling all over himself, not being used to being around pretty girls and also being trapped int he motherfucking friendzone (not just friendzone but basically endzone, as this bitch has literally thrown him on the ground. dude. take a hint).

so they come in and kitris like noooooo when BOOM SHIT HAPPENS. basilio comes in and he’s like “imma kill myself right now” and everyone is like nooooo. basilio fakes his suicide, because as we know, S u I cI De is KeW l rather than terrible and not something to make light of.

realizing that this is all a bunch of fucking malarkey, don q persuades lorenzo to marry kitri to the dead basilio because another important fact, necrophilia is also cool and somehow lorenzo is more likely to allow her daughter to marry a fucking dead guy than a live and sexy one. so kitris all “pls dad its his final dying wish dad why you gotta do this to a ded man” and so dad bro agrees.  JOKES ON YOU OLD DAD when the marriage to the dead guy is over THE FUCKER JUMPS UP because he aint dead and surprise haha you married your daughter off and now this bitch ass punk is alive.

act three opens on their wedding and these fucking cuties get to get all married and shit, and don q and sancho wander off into the sunset, much to sanchos continued dismay, and for once, they all live HAPPILY FUCKING AFTAH

(ballerinas wear tutus on their wedding days because SCREW COMFORT)

*closes storybook* and that is the ballet of don quixote

Brief summary of the beginning of the XIX century and the Napoleonic wars: (Spanish Perspective)
  • Spain: *is under a useless and spineless government*
  • France (Napoleon) to the Spanish government: Spain help us or we'll invade you.
  • Literally everybody in Spain: *side-eyeing PM Godoy* Bitch don't you dare.
  • Spanish Government (Godoy mostly): Okay Mr. Napoleon
  • Literally everybody in Spain: The bitch did dare!
  • *
  • France: Make sure for us Portugal doesn't help Britain or we'll invade you both.
  • Spain: OK *does the oranges "war" thing*
  • Portugal: *Shows up late with coffee* What?
  • *
  • ~Stuff happening in the Americas that nobody actually cares about that much~
  • *
  • BATTLE OF TRAFALGAR:
  • France: Spain, we need your navy to help us invade Britain.
  • Spain: Do we have to?
  • France: I'm sending over Admiral Villeneuve to command our combined fleet.
  • Villeneuve: I'm in charge. You'll do as I say
  • Spanish Admiral Gravina: But I know these waters, I know my fleet and how the British fight at sea I know... wait... no... don't do that... you are useless.
  • Villeneuve: I AM IN CHARGE NAPOLEON SAID SO
  • Villeneuve: *is useless*
  • Admiral Horatio Nelson: "England expects that every man will do his duty"
  • Villeneuve: *still useless*
  • Gravina: We are so fucked.
  • Spanish/French fleet: *is fucked*
  • *
  • Britain to Spain: You have a problem dude.
  • Spain: No shit! *has a list*
  • *
  • PENINSULAR WAR:
  • France: Well now I'm gonna invade Portugal. Let me through.
  • France: Invades Spain now that they are at it and puts Napoleon's brother as King.
  • Spanish People: NOW YOU'VE DONE IT BITCH *invent guerrillas*
  • Britain, Portugal & CO.: Here. We're gonna help.
  • Spain: Thanks guys, but can the helping involve less trashing around maybe?
  • Everybody: Trashes around, burns everything to the ground, steals chickens.
  • Spain: THAT'S IT!!! EVERYBODY OUT!!! EVERYBODY FOR FUCK'S SAKE! AND FRANCE THE FIRST ONE LEAVE ME IN PEACE YOU BAGUETTE PIECE OF S***
  • Ordinary people with pitchforks: Throw Napoleon's army out.
  • *
  • AFTERMATH:
  • Spain: I'm so... fucking tired... just... let me rest in piece... for a while. Just a little
  • Immediate internal and colonial conflicts: Hi :)
  • Spain: T_T